Jealous One’s Envy
Leighton and Tatum are snuggled on the couch finishing up the documentary of Paris is Burning.
Tatum seems mildly impressed with what she saw.
Leighton: Well?
Tatum: That was interesting. I knew nothing of any of this whole scene but it’s also before our time.
L: They still have balls in this day and age.
T: Oh? In New York?
L: Yeah.
T: Well, now that’s…
L: Don’t worry, I’m not going to ask you to go to one cause I know you’d be uncomfortable.
Tatum gets huffy: Babe, as long as I know what’s going on beforehand, it will be fine. I don’t like surprises.
L: Same. You ready for bed?
T: Mmm hmm, come here.
Tatum grabs Leighton and they kiss. Tatum starts kissing her neck and Leighton literally has her breath taken away. She almost starts to give in but then Tatum’s phone goes off. It snaps them both out of it. Tatum grabs Leighton’s hand and leads her into the bedroom. They both climb in to the Monarch Vi-Spring Bed and assume their favorite sleeping position: Leighton lying her head on Tatum’s chest.
Tatum’s phone goes off again.
L: It’s almost midnight, who is texting you at this hour?
Leighton feels her jealousy start to creep in.
T: I don’t know. I’ll check it in the morning.
L: Maybe you should check it now.
Tatum looks at Leighton quizzically and then it dawns on her that Leighton is jealous. “Oh shit!” she thought. In a show of good faith, she hands Leighton her phone.
T: You said you were gonna work through this. So how about I help you? You check my phone for me.
Leighton grabs her phone out of her hands and looks at the message and reads it out loud.
Hey It’s Stacey! I haven’t talked to you in a while. I miss you. How about we have a talk near our favorite hotel sometime this week.
L: Stacey huh?
Tatum’s blank expression hides the anxiety she’s suddenly feeling even though she’s done nothing wrong.
L: Who is she, Tatum?
T: I can’t even believe we’re doing this right now. I haven’t talked to her which she says in the text that you just read. She’s just somebody I hooked up with a couple of times. It wasn’t serious.
L: Your favorite hotel? Would it be the Browningside Hotel? I think I know it well.
T: Leighton, please don’t do this. I wasn’t unfaithful the first time we were together or during this time where we are trying again.
L: Neither have I.
T: Okay so what’s happening here?
Leighton sighs: I don’t know. You’ve been the first person I have dated to where I am scared I could lose you to someone else.
T: Leighton, I’m right here. It wasn’t me who left.
L: Actually you did.
T: You were talking crazy to me, I wasn’t sticking around for that.
Leighton goes silent.
T: Look, if you can’t handle I have had other experiences, I don’t know what we’re going to do.
L: What are you saying?
T: Babe, Graduation Day is not far away, I can’t deal with relationship stress along with the other shit.
That snaps Leighton into a realization. She and Tatum don’t have long to be together. She seriously doubts Tatum would do long distance as she knows she couldn’t.
Leighton begins tearing up. Tatum holds her.
T: Maybe we need a couple of days away from one another. And don’t even open your mouth to say so I can talk to Stacey. No, that’s not it. We’re not breaking up okay? Just a little reset. But we’ll deal with it in the morning…
Leighton falls asleep immediately on Tatum.
The next morning Tatum Uber Eats breakfast for she and Leighton. Leighton sits in Tatum’s lap eating her toast and fresh oats along with fruit. She teasingly feeds Tatum as Tatum sips her cappuccino.
T: What time do you have class?
L: 11:30
Tatum looks at the clock on the wall: Its 9:30 right now. Let’s take a bath.
Leighton: We have ten days left, babe.
T: You can be intimate without sex…babe.
Leighton and Tatum slowly undress as they both eye each other and get into the bathtub together.
Once again, they assume the position, Leighton in Tatum’s lap.
Tatum takes the shampoo and begins washing Leighton’s hair and peppering kisses and rubs on her head…and shoulders.
Leighton is smiling from ear to ear. She does not want the distance of a couple of days away from Tatum but she feels she might be right about a reset.
Tatum begins bathing Leighton caressing the body wash all over her body from her neck to her breasts to her stomach to the rest of her body. Leighton shivers even though the bath water is steaming hot.
Leighton turns to look at Tatum, scanning her dark blue eyes, cheekbones and full lips.
L: Stand up.
T: For what?
L: So I can return the favor.
T: Well, I’ll be…
They both stand up in the bathtub and share a kiss.
Leighton takes the shampoo and begins caressing Tatum’s scalp, their lips never leaving the other’s. She puts the shampoo down and picks up the body wash. Like Tatum did for her, she rubs the body wash from her neck to her breasts to her stomach to the rest of her. Her favorite part of Tatum, aside from her lips, are her arms. She rubs the soap down both her arms and then her armpits. She can feel Tatum shivering with all of it. Tatum looks square at her, blue eyes darkening.
T: Ten more days.
Leighton laughs.
They finish up and get out of the bathtub, brush their teeth and get dressed.
Leighton: I’m going to talk to my therapist about this.
Tatum: Okay. Listen, I will pick you up on Friday (it’s Tuesday right now) and we’ll go to Hen of the Wood for dinner.
Leighton: Ooh, that place is delicious.
Tatum drops Leighton near her room with Kimberly, kisses her goodbye and drives off.
Leighton walks into her room and Kimberly greets her.
K: I have been worried about you so thanks for at least posting on Instagram you were watching a movie so I knew you were fine.
L: I was at Tatum’s.
K: I figured but I wasn’t sure.
L: How have you been?
K: I have been great, actually. The research for Senator Chase is going good. Politics is a dirty business.
L: Oh I know. Love life?
K: Canaan and I are taking it slow. I see Jackson every now and then but we don’t converse. Alicia?
L: She’s not happy but I’ll see her today. I’m working today at the center and most likely will run into her.
K: How are things with Tatum?
L: They’re going okay. We are also going to take it slow. We both have trust issues.
K: About?
L: Her mouth and my jealousy.
Kimberly looks confused.
Leighton laughs: Yeah, exactly.
K: Leighton Murray is jealous? I never thought I’d see the day.
L: Yes, while we were getting ready for bed, she got a text from a hook up.
Kimberly braces herself.
Leighton continues: She let me read the text. It was more of the girl wanting to see Tatum than the other way around. She said we should take a few days away from each other. I don’t really want to but she’s probably right.
K: You think she’ll go talk to her?
L: I doubt it. This isn’t a big school so if she does, I’ll know about it. I got class soon, I just wanted to check in. I’ll see you at Sips later and we can talk more.
K: Sounds good
Tatum and her friend Madison are walking towards Pilates.
M: Is Brandi leading the class?
T: I think so but maybe Brynn.
M: You seem nervous *laughing*
T: I am. I haven’t really seen her outside of class since me and Leighton agreed to try again.
M: You mean after you cheated on her with Leighton…
T: Fuck. Yeah. I also got a text from Stacey while Leighton was over last night.
M: Tatum! This is like freshman and sophomore year all over again!
Tatum looks pained: I know it. Freshman and sophomore me would have absolutely taken Stacey up on her offer. We had fun together but I can’t do that anymore. You and I are out of here shortly.
M: What are you gonna do?
T: I’m going to call Stacey and let her know I’m not available.
M: And Brandi?
T: We have business class together tomorrow but I saw her last week in class and we kept it cordial.
M: Well, Deena is being a bitch and not talking to me.
T: Perhaps you shouldn’t get drunk and yell in her face that you two aren’t fucking enough.
M: We aren’t.
T: Then dump her! Sex is a big part of a relationship. You’re already experiencing LBD at 21?
Maddie shakes her head: We all can’t have the eyes and the dimples that you do, TT.
Tatum smirks at Maddie: Well, that’s true.
Maddie playfully hits Tatum.
T: Alright, here we go. Who is it at the front?
Maddie sees a tall skinny sandy haired blonde girl: It’s Brynn.
Tatum and Maddie look at each other and breathe sighs of relief.
Leighton is at the women’s center going over plans for a speaker with Jane.
J: Who is coming, Murray?
L: Willie Wyms
J: Sounds like a Marvel character.
They both laugh.
L: Short for Wilhelmina. She’s coming to talk about safe sex for our community.
J: How goes things in that area?
L: Well we’re on four days clean so far.
Jane laughs.
L: We’re gonna keep apart for a couple of days. We’ve got some stuff to work out.
J: Fighting?
L: No actually, we were together this morning. She dropped me off. It’s just she got a text from a girl last night.
J: Oh.
L: It didn’t sound suspicious but I got jealous and kind of let it be known.
J: Well I’ve known Tatum since she arrived on campus. Girls love her.
L: That’s comforting.
Jane: I mean back in our freshman and sophomore years, she basically pulled a you just without the STI.
L: Damnit.
J: But late sophomore year, she really calmed down. She got involved with a professor. A woman, obviously. It was kept secret but Tatum fell for her hard. It’s hard to imagine confident as shit Tatum being a simp but she was.
L: Whoa!
J: Don’t ever tell her I told you that.
L: Does the professor still work here?
J: She does. They were both of legal age even though the balance of power is with the one with the credential, right? The professor got a slap on the wrist and Tatum wasn’t punished. She transferred out of her class.
L: Who is it?
J: I’m not in the business of outing people, you get me?
L: Oh…I see. I get it.
J: Did you see who the girl was who texted her?
L: Stacey.
Jane rolls her eyes: Oh yeah, her. A bit possessive that one. They were never serious but she came sniffing around after you and Tatum split up the first time.
Leighton winces.
Jane: Hey it’s okay. She was furious for a while and probably still is but she cares about you.
Leighton smiles.
L: I care about her too and we don’t have long since she’s graduating soon. I don’t know what we’re gonna do after that.
J: Take it one day at a time. Enjoy the time you have together for now. Value it.
Leighton nods: The jealousy thing is getting to me.
J: If this was freshman and sophomore year Tatum, I would be concerned. But she’s mellowed out since then. She’ll look but won’t touch.
L: She cheated on Brandi with me.
J: And you cheated on Alicia with her so you are even.
Leighton shuts her mouth after that.
Alicia comes by to take a look at the speaker: Willie Wyms? Sounds like a Marvel character.
Leighton and Jane smirk.
A: Hey Murray, how are you and the other half of Blondage doing?
L: Everything is fine. I don’t want to discuss it with you really.
A: We’re all friends here.
L: Are we? You don’t like her, Alicia and she doesn’t like you. My business is my business.
A: Boundaries? Okay, noted Murray. Guess you no longer have to worry about paying for two meals.
Leighton hugs Jane goodbye and half jokingly says: You’re right, I don’t. I have to go…
Wednesday comes and goes and Tatum and Leighton don’t speak to one another either by phone or text and it drove the both of them nuts.
On Thursday, Leighton talks to the doc:
D: How are you, Leighton?
L: I’m doing okay.
D: How’s the abstaining going?
L: Well, although I’m getting antsy. It’s been five days. We didn’t talk to each other at all yesterday and I didn’t even see her on campus.
D: How did that feel?
L: Not good, we agreed to give each other a couple of days. She’s picking me up for dinner tomorrow.
D: What led to the not seeing each other?
Leighton sighs and repeats her story:
We were together Monday night, getting ready for bed when she got a text message from a previous fling. I let the jealousy seep in. She suggested taking a small break. I don’t think she’ll seek her out but I don’t know.
D: I want you to practice gratitude.
L: okay?
D: Instead on focusing on the jealousy aspect of what you’re going through with her, think about what you’re thankful for being with her.
L: I feel safe with her. She’s beautiful obviously. She’s funny and I laugh all the time. She’s quick to protect me or comfort me if I start to lose it. I never thanked her for making me feel safe enough to come out to my dad while we were out at dinner. I mean I did thank her later on that night. *both the doctor and Leighton giggle* but you know what I mean. She’s a wonderful lover. She caters to my likes or dislikes in bed. It feels good not having to pay for things when she’s around. She loves art and her family. She’s goal driven and it’s such a turn on. We do communicate well if we like or don’t like something so I guess I’m grateful for all of that. She is opening up about getting to know things about queer culture.
Doctor: Okay that’s good. So why is the text message bothering you?
Leighton: Because the last time one of us got a text message while in bed together, it was from my ex.
Doctor: I see. And you’re worried the same thing will happen in reverse.
L: Ye…I don’t know. She doesn’t seem hung up on old girlfriends like I was. I’m sure it’s because her experience is more than mine. But…I have a nagging feeling.
D: Have you mentioned that is what your concern is?
L: She had no problem with me seeing Alicia. My trust level is not where hers was at the time. But I know that’s gone. I don’t have the desire to see Alicia anymore like that but I know because of it, her trust level is low.
D: Don’t change the subject, Leighton. We’re talking about your trust level. Is it guilt masking itself as jealousy?
L: I think so. But I get worried. She’s like a magnet to women. I mean I had my fun too last year but I don’t know…it’s different.
D: Are you feeling insecure?
L: A little. I know she finds me extremely attractive and I find her irresistible so that’s not an issue. But still, I have had two of her flings come up and confront me and neither one of them was the girl who texted her.
D: You’ve been confronted?
L: Yes. Some girl named Michelle called me a whore and that I don’t deserve Tatum after what happened. I didn’t tell her that another girl named Amber also made a comment towards me.
D: Why haven’t you said anything to her?
L: I don’t know. She’ll say she’s not doing anything and she can’t control what they do..and she’s right.
D: You’ll see her tomorrow?
L: .Yes.
D: Talk to her about it. She’s not prone to outbursts you have said so you should be able to have a mature discussion about this.
L: Yeah.
D: Okay, we’ll talk next week and we will see how it goes.
Thursday comes and goes and neither of them speak or see each other on campus.
Friday comes and Tatum immediately texts Leighton that she can’t wait to see her. Leighton grins to herself and texts back the same thing.
Neither have class on Friday so while Tatum hangs with her teammates, Leighton has breakfast with Bela and Whitney. Bela argues with Eric on the phone briefly. She hangs up the phone, shakes her head and says she doesn’t want to talk about it. Leighton and Whitney laugh.
B: Still not having sex?
L: No, we have eight more days
B: She’s so hot though, Leighton.
L: Bela, please stop looking at my girlfriend.
B: I’m just saying.
Whitney shakes her head: Well, Matt and I are doing well.
L: Yeah, he seems like a cool dude. It’s good to see you happy.
Whitney smiles. Breakfast goes off without a hitch.
Leighton has a snack for lunch and eagerly awaits seeing Tatum later that night.
8 pm arrives. Leighton gets a text:
I’m here, babe.
Leighton has a light red dress on to go with her Louboutins. She spots Tatum outside, in a short black dress that shows off her long legs, as well as black heels. They make quite the pair. Tatum kisses her: “You look good enough to eat.” They smirk at each other.
Tatum opens the door, taking a peek as Leighton positions herself in the car. Leighton shakes her head and giggles.
Tatum gets in the car but can’t shake the feeling she’s forgotten something. She thinks to herself : “I have my purse and my wallet. My phone is right here, Leighton is right there. What am I forgetting?”
As Tatum and Leighton get out of the car, hand in hand to Hen’s, they’re giggling and laughing as someone approaches them.
Standing in front of them, a very attractive woman with shoulder length brown hair, blue eyes and ruby red lips opens her mouth and says “Hi Tatum. Can’t answer my text huh?”
Tatum internally screams, “Oh shit! I forgot to call Stacey!”
Leighton gives a look to Tatum who stands there frozen.
To be continued…