He didn't know how it happened, or why. He couldn’t think right now. He didn't know what triggered it. His chest was heaving, his body felt so so heavy. He was so small. Everything around him was so...uncomfortable. He was sitting on the ground, and it was a carpet and he hated that. He hated the softness, hated the contrast that the hard wall gave on the back of his head.
His vision was blurry, he was so confused. He didn’t know what was happening but he felt like he wasn’t even here in the moment. Everything that had came before was forgotten and he was trying to figure out a way to get his emotions and surrounding’s stable and comfortable.
He tried to get up, moving his arms to try and push himself. But for some reason they didn't work, they didn't follow his command and that confused him so much. Maybe it's because there was nothing to hold on to. Tears pricked his eyes, and he let a small whimper escape his lips.
Tony was staring at the kid in front of him. They had been talking about one of the kid’s funky inventions when they stopped just to look at the news. A story was playing, something about a man named ‘Skip’ being arrested. He didn’t know who he was, and he would of found out what happened if it wasn’t for Peter turning off the TV quickly before sliding out his chair. Falling down and crawling to the farthest corner within the room.
He didn’t react at first, shocked by the way the boy was looking around with wide eyes, his breaths heavy. He tried to get up, but his legs didn’t cooperate and he ended up falling back. Peter whimpered, hands coming to wrap around his knees as he curled up in a ball. Head resting on his knees, like he was hiding from the world.
Tony watched, then frowned when he started to cry. He was confused, but the man didn’t want to pry too much. He needed to figure out how to calm the boy down before he gave himself a panic attack.
“Kid?” The man whispered, getting up from the chair as he came towards the high schooler. “Kid are you okay?” He knelt down on one knee, a look of concern settled on his face. Peter didn’t say anything, his ball just got tighter and Tony was left confused.
Peter had only did this once before, after the boy had fallen and broken leg due to a bus accident. It was when he got silent, and could really only speak three words. He acted like a little kid, and while Tony wasn’t well versed in what it was, or the name, he knew it was a process that therapists used or recommended sometimes.
“Peter.” He tried again, before remembering the last time this happened. “Spider?” Tony said to get his attention, to get the boy to realize this was serious.
It worked, because slowly Peter looked up, lip trembling as wet cheeks from tears gleamed in the room’s light. He smiled a little bit, from approval and sighed. “Hey Buddy,” Tony sat down, criss crossed to seem less threatening. Peter looked at him, eyes locked before he looked at the TV. When he saw it was off, he relaxed his body, just a tad - and sniffled.
“What happened? What’s wrong?” He questioned, and he knew it was a half shot. Peter could barely speak in this state, which confused him just a little. Peter had the thought process of a eight year old, he could read and write when like this. But not speak.
The boy’s eyes flashed from the TV to Tony and whimpered. “Daddy,” It was soft and if Tony hadn’t been a few inches away from him, he wouldn’t have heard. That was a new word. He frowned, taken aback before he tried to play it off and be casual. “Me?” Peter shook his head, “Papa,” He looked to the man, eyes locked on his before they shifted to the TV. “Daddy,” He pointed to the screen before he curled up more, but didn’t hide.
Now Tony was really confused. ‘Papa’ wasn’t a new word, he called him that twice before the last time this happened. ‘Daddy’ was a new word, and he figured Peter was referring to the man named ‘Skip.’
He nodded though, he’ll figure out all the details later. He sighed and went to one of the cabinets in the office room, pulling out a sugary sweet. It was a simple lollipop, but he knew this Peter liked it. So he then walked back over and handed it to him.
The boy snatched it out his hand, before his eyes went wide and he frowned. “Sorry..Sorry,” He then opened it before plopping it into his mouth. Tony smiled, “It’s okay,” He reached up and softly ran a hand through his hair. Peter relaxed a little, looking at the older man before looking back at the TV screen. The man frowned, and looked at it, before going over to the remote. It had fallen due to the boy practically sliding it off the table.
Tony fiddled with it, before he turned it on. He didn’t keep it on the news for long though and switched it to one of the more family friendly channels. There was a show about some blue dog, and he decided to keep it on there.
His eyes flashed to Peter, who wasn’t so tense, his eyes were fixated on the screen in a less worried manner and he sighed in relief. Peter’s phone then started to ring and picked it up. He went over to the kid, and ruffled his hair before he spoke. “I have to go make a call..you stay in here okay? Make yourself comfortable,” Tony smiled and Peter whimpered. “Pa’pa,” It was a little distorted from the lollipop, but he understood it.
“It’s okay, I’ll come back, promise,” The older man assured and the kid hesitated, looking at Tony’s eyes. As if he was looking for a lie, before he nodded.
When Tony made it out the door, he immediately accepted the call on Peter’s phone. It was from the person who was in Peter’s life for the longest.
May Parker.
As soon as Tony picked up, she started to talk immediately. Her voice rapid and a little frantic. “Peter? Oh my goodness are you alright?!” She sounded so panicked. “No, no it’s me,” Tony explained, and the woman let a few beats of silence happen before she started to speak again. “Is Peter okay? Did he see the news?”
“Yes, yes he did..And um, when he did he…changed? He..I don’t know how to explain..but that’s why I picked up the phone instead of him..”
The woman let out an exasperated sigh. “You’re probably confused…aren’t you?” May asked, and Tony could only hum a “mhm.”
“I-Ill explain it all to you..it’s kind of a long story, but I’ll try and keep it short.”
Peter was staring at the television, watching the cartoon. His body relaxed. A small voice in his head was urging him, telling him to go find Aunt May because she knew what to do in these situations. But he mostly ignored it, because Papa said to stay here. He let his brain think why he was so upset, why he was triggered into being small: It was him. He was..arrested…For what? He didn’t know, but he doubted it was because of what he did to him. Those nights…babysitting him at seven..eight…nine…
Those touches and whispers. Daddy telling him how he felt so good, even when Peter was crying and begging. Even though he was fighting for it to be over soon. Daddy was mean, he liked him quiet. He only liked a few words spoken when he was told. It kept happening until he got the courage to tell Aunt May…To tell her how Daddy had been hurting him.
He was crying again, but it wasn’t fearful or panic. It just felt good. To cry at the moment. He didn’t have to fear the man coming to hurt him either. Because Papa was here, and he was always so kind to him.
Soon enough the door opened again and the boy smiled, and pushed himself up to sit on the back of his thighs. Tony came in, he looked mad and a little irritated.
Peter whimpered and sat back on his backside, and leaned against the wall again. Why was Papa mad? Was he mad at him? Thoughts surged in his head as the man came closer. The sound of the shoes against the carpet was unusually loud to his ears, and it made him cover them. Scared and confused, he closed his eyes. Why? He didn’t really know, maybe it was to prepare for whatever Papa was going to do to him. Maybe it was because Peter didn’t want to look at him. Maybe it was because he just didn’t know what else to do. And truthfully: he didn’t.
Next thing the boy felt was arms around him. He gasped in surprise, the sucker almost falling out his mouth. Peter opened his eyes, and looked up. The man was over him, hugging him in a warm embrace. He took in a breath, feeling so utterly small..but…in a good way.
Tony breathed as he looked down at the boy. Watching him look up at him meekly, processing what was happening. He himself was trying to process too. Process what May told him, processing that any human being could do that to a boy. He sighed, the boy still trying to figure out what was happening.
“Oh Spider,” He used the name to get the boy to focus on him, noticing the poor thing had no clue. “May told me what happened..why this is happening.” He informed, and Peter breathed out slow. Mouth slightly open, like he was acknowledging what Tony had just said. “I’m so sorry kid,” His voice was as soft as he could try and make it.
Peter blinked, before he pulled his hands from his ears and slowly hugged Tony back. Pulling him closer, like a little kid desperate for contact. It made Tony’s heart melt, just a little. “Papa,” The boy whispered, looking at him, smiling a little before frowning. “Sorry,”
“No, no kid, why are you apologizing?” It felt good to ask the question, even if it would take a second him to figure it out. Peter only knew so many words in this state, after all.
“Sorry,” He said again, and pointed to himself, and then with a hand gesture did the ‘just a pinch,’ sign. Tony understood then and shook his head. “No, no kid,” He frowned and stopped hugging him only for the hands to go to his face. Cupping his cheeks gently. “There’s no need to apologize, Peter. This is perfectly okay,” He smiled, hoping it was reassuring.
The kid seemed to think for a second, before smiling back and nodding.
It was a few hours afterwards, that Peter came back. They had spent the rest of the afternoon watching cartoons. Aunt May had came over, to take care of the small one. Tony learned he liked to play with building bricks, and hated when things were too soft. He liked a soft blanket in a slightly hard cushioned chair to sit on, and his favorite cartoon was ‘Daniel Tiger.’
When Peter came back to them, his voice was no longer higher pitched, his movements were more coordinated and he got his voice back.
When he came back, May hugged him, before he told her that he wanted to talk to Tony alone. The woman agreed, kissing his forehead before going out the room.
Peter turned to Tony, and sighed nervously. “So..Mr. Stark..what happened?”
The older man raised an eyebrow from where he was sitting. “You..don’t remember?”
“I do..I think..but I’m also an unreliable narrator sometimes..when I’m like that.” Peter explained, and the man nodded. “I see…” He sighed and sat up more. “Well..we were talking, when the television suddenly covered a man’s arrest. The man’s name was…”
“Skip..”
“Yes…” Tony nodded in confirmation. “Then you turned off the TV and..regressed?”
“Yeah…” He sighed. “Do..you know why he was arrested?”
“They um..finally took your reports seriously after it happened to another kid…” Tony told him. “May informed me,” He added, not wanting to come off like a creep.
Peter let out a soft breath…maybe it was relief? He didn’t really know, his brain trying to gather and wrap his head around it all. “I’m really sorry Mr. Stark. You shouldn’t of had to deal with that…I..I couldn’t control it at the moment I’m really sorry-“
“Kid, kid, calm down.” He put a hand on the boys shoulder. “It’s fine..I didn’t- I don't mind at all.” He smiled, and the boy sniffled, eyes getting watery before he hugged the man. “Thank you…”
“You’re welcome.”