Lose me to love you

"What the hell does he want from me after all these years?" you pulled him closer to you then you got on your knees so you could wrap your arms around his neck.

"I don't know but you need to keep this information to yourself for now and get to the root of it" you whispered as you pressed a chaste kiss on his neck.

"Don't tell me what to do" he mumbled but he wasn't trying to be rude, he was just trying to be dominating. He always had to be the dominating one, anything other than that made him feel wimpy.

"Sorrryyy daddy" he sighed as you mumbled ,

"Don't be baby" 

"I love you .. I just want to tell you that I'm here for you, with you" 

"I know sweetheart " 

"You don't..you have no idea how much I need you in my life and how much I appreciate you for taking care of me..i know i have been a brat before but–" 

"Where is all this coming from? Are you feeling unsafe?" He asked you as he gripped your hair in his fist and pulled your head back so he could look into your eyes.

"Noooo..not as long as I have you ..but without you..it –" your eyes teared up and lips trembled as you felt overwhelmed "Just the thought of being without you feels like.. hell" his eyes moistened too as he heard your shaky voice. He truly wished he could have kept you safe and happy but he wasn't really sure if he was capable of giving you both at once.

"What is making you feel this way?" 

"Nothing..I just..there was this girl in my orphanage..she wasn't my friend or anything but we talked sometimes..found her on a pornsite today..she was around the wrong man in her life, alone and lost..that could have been me.. without you" as your tears dripped down he wiped them with his thumbs and then you felt his lips on yours. He kissed you as tenderly as he could, as softly as his physical self could provide.

"That would never be you, I was always here and I'll be here forever darling, we met for a reason, I was supposed to take care of you all my life" Maybe it was the fact that he tried to hurt himself was what got to you finally, you imagined your life without him after you turned 18 and everything seemed like hell, it gave you the same feeling you got at the center, it wouldn't have been hard to spiral down and get into wrong company like that girl did.

But he never allowed you to get yourself in deep trouble, he could have exploited you in the worst possible ways, as fucked up as he claimed to be he had all the reasons to pick the wrong side, he could have made you do anything he wanted and you were so obsessed with him you would have obliged to make him happy and keep his attention, he knew everything and he still chose to keep you guarded, safe and protected from everything bad out there. 

"Don't ever think about leaving me again..I can't take it..I won't be able to move on" you sniffled as the emotions felt too much.

"I know..I'm not going anywhere I promise..i promise sweetheart…shhhh now..stop crying " his voice was so soft and whispery, his thumb kept wiping your tears, he kissed you in between his words and he just wanted you to feel better even if he didn't know how to do it that well.

You pulled him on the bed and snuggled him closely, momentarily he forgot about everything else and the warmth of your body kept him calm, your voice on his ears made him feel safe, your fingers caressing all over his back felt lovely but as soon as you fell asleep the fears creeped in again. Odin was nowhere to be found and now he had an intruder in his own house, his own ex wife came here with an agenda, not knowing what her intentions were was killing him. You wanted him to be calm but it was nearly impossible. 

Next morning you found him in the kitchen making breakfast, thankfully Jolene wasn't there so you went behind him and hugged him 

"One of these days I'm going to be really upset that you never wake me up when you do" he chuckled as you said that 

"You like to sleep in..why would I wake you?" He asked you so you sighed "By the way what were you watching on the pornsite?" Your face flushed as he questioned.

"I wasn't watching porn.. someone sent me the link on facebook" he turned around and picked you up so he could make you sit down on the countertop.

"That better be true..you're not allowed to watch porn from now on..I'll give you a show whenever you are feeling naughty" you kissed him as soon as he finished his words

"You're the naughty one" he chuckled and pulled away from you.

"Mmmm okay let me finish this up, i have to drop you to the set" 

"Drop me? Where are you going?"

"Just something I have to do" He was glad you didn't remember the date, the first year of living together he brought it up and you passed out right in front of his eyes, he freaked out and vowed to never remind you again. 

"Leaving me alone?" 

"You're not alone baby, you'd be working, you'd be safe there.. nobody can get in without an ID and I promise I'd be back in two hours max" you hugged him tightly as he said that, you didn't ask further questions, if he wanted to tell you he would have shared it. You trusted him blindly, one thing you knew was the fact that he'd never hurt you in a way you didn't want him to hurt you.

"What about the traitorous bitch wife of yours?"

"I'm going to take care of that" 

Jolene was shocked to know that Loki didn't want to take her with you two today, after the supposed attack she was hoping that he'd be ridden with guilt and will crawl back to her slowly but nothing like that happened. He told her where he was going after dropping you to the set and she informed Thor almost immediately, that's exactly what Loki wanted. 

"Just keep it on the shelf dear" he smiled as he heard her voice, your mother wasn't that much older than him, not even a decade of difference, she was delusional in her faith but her heart was pure, ever since you all came to the center he had formed an emotional attachment to both mother and daughter, everytime she was hurt by your father she came to him to talk and he always welcomed her with an open arms, the relationship remained pure, she felt like an elder sister he never had. 

"How are you today?" He asked her after he stacked the books on the shelf. The bruise on her cheeks didn't go unnoticed, her husband disappeared two days ago, courtesy of Odin, another blessing he offered to your mother to trap her emotionally and she fell for it.

"I'm good..yeah" her eyes contradicted her words so he walked over to her and hugged her. 

"Lolooo come play scrabbles with me..it's not fun playing alone" he smiled as he looked at you. You were busy with the game and his heart clenched as he looked at you. Things were getting worse at the center, Thor told him that father was getting close to fulfilling his mission, he had to do something to get you away from this monstrosity. 

"Loki can you promise me something" he nodded as she asked him that "If something happens to me–" 

"Don't say that–" 

"Just make sure she's taken care of, my y/n just promise me you'll take care of her" His eyes teared up as she said that

"She needs you, she'll always need her mama, just say a word and I ...I'm thinking of something to stop all of this–" 

"Stop this? What are you talking about? This place is heaven Loki" 

"You don't know the lies you have been fed by my father"

"Enough loki ..I won't hear a word against him..just promise me..you'll take care of her" he sighed as she said that. She was too blinded by her faith to reason with him.

"I promise..i promise I'll never leave her alone" 

He placed the bouquet down on her grave, the memories surfaced over and it hurt to think of your mother, out of all the people that became the victim of his father she was the one who trusted him blindly, she was also the one he wanted to save with all his might but he was so weak at the time, he couldn't do anything, he could barely protect you. He felt a presence around him so he wiped his tears, 

"I know you're there Thor" he turned around to face his brother and Thor finally came out of hiding. Loki's jaw clenched as he looked at him, a part of him wanted to run to him and hug his older brother but knowing the tainted shared history their relationship seemed like a sin now, children of such an evil man, he wouldn't be surprised if Thor was still bidding for Odin.

"Cat is out of the bag I see" his demeanor still as boastful as he remembered his brother to be and that only made him angrier "You know we fucked right..me and her mother? Now you're fucking the daughter..we truly are fucked up brother" As soon as Thor finished his words Loki walked up to him and punched him which only made him laugh in response "You have gotten stronger I like that" 

"Why the fuck are you here again?" Loki asked him as he grabbed the collar of his shirt, 

"Not the question I expected after like what ..12 years of not seeing each other?" 

"Don't do this Thor, i fucking saved your life" 

"You abandoned me and mother to run off with your little starling" Thor snapped at him and that earned him another punch.

"I made a decision, I wanted to do something right for once, what did you do? What did mother do to protect us? She allowed us to be abused over and over again..right in front of her eyes" 

"And you think her life was easy? You think she didn't suffer?" Thor's eyes teared up so Loki took a step back.

"Why are you here?" 

"For your little starling " 

"Don't you even think of hurting her" 

"I am going to..i have to. Mother said she's going to ruin everything" 

When Loki returned to you after a few hours, he was badly bruised and bleeding. 

"What the hell happened" you asked him as you looked at him.

"Nothing..just got into a fight" 

"With whom" 

"Get in the car and seal your lips shut for sometimes" you sighed as he said that. When you both reached the apartment, he grabbed Jolene by the arms and threw her out of the apartment with no explanation offered whatsoever, she cried and yelled, blaming him for ruining her life but he shut the door, that made you feel slightly better. He grabbed your hand and took you to his bedroom

"Just stay here, I'm going to take a bath..don't go anywhere..you hear me?" You nodded as he said that, his voice remained harsh but you could tell he was hurting, he was probably relishing all the pain though. Did he meet Thor? He must have, what did he want?" 

As he came out naked as the day he was born, you noticed how bad he was beaten up, his chest had a gnarly black bruise ..so did his ribs, his right cheekbone had a cut and his face seemed messed up. He put on a brief and stormed out of the room, he was careful to not shut the door loudly, he was trying his best even though he knew he was failing you every second. He was lost in his thoughts when he felt you sitting on his lap, you had a first aid box that you placed next to him on the couch. 

"You met Thor" you mumbled as you used the disinfectant solution to wipe the cuts on his face. He winced as the solution burned but there was a hint of gratification in his moan, your eyes teared up as you looked at him, his need to feel pain just so his mind would stop screaming at him for a moment broke your heart. He grabbed your hand and placed it on his chest right where he was hurt, 

"Hurt me" he looked at you and his eyes were burning red with tears.

"Noooo" you shook your head and moved your head down to place a soft kiss on the mark giving him the opposite of what he asked for. He let out a small moan, almost sounded like a whimper. 

"Hurt meee please..I need it..I need to stop thinking" your arms wrapped around his neck as he said that, his voice sounded broken.

 "Think about me then..I'm all yours to think about" you kissed him as tenderly as you could, avoiding the cut that went past his jawline. His arms wrapped around your waist, face hidden between your neck then he took a bite, not harsh enough to break the skin but enough to sting, it only turned you on though. Your hips moved mindlessly over his crotch then you pulled back so you could take him out of the confinement and play with him, anything to distract him, you'd give your whole life just to have him stop feeling so tormented "I love you Loki..so much..you're so so so goddamn beautiful to me" you whispered in his ear and he shook his head, shattered little moans escaped his throat as you moved your hand up and down slowly.

"I'm a monster..I have always been one" his teeth greeted as he spoke,

"Nooooo.. that's not you..that was your father..you could never ever be one ..you're my angel, you saved my life, gave me a better one and that makes you my god" 

"Don't say that..fuckk"  he put his head down on the couch as your words melted in his ears. Your god? Just the thought of his sweet precious girl considering him as one made him painfully hard. Your strokes remained slow, your thumb wiped the precum from the top and you used it to aid your movements. "Keep talking baby" 

He mumbled softly and it made you smile.

"The day you came for me..one of the thoughts I had was that I was utterly blessed" you whispered in his ear and he hummed, he always loved it when you stroked his ego..that combined with you stroking his cock was too much to bear

"And the other thoughts?" He asked you

"Mmmmm just wanted you to take me home.. and fuck me..my body under yours, rubbing against each other.. I have fantasized about doing this with you for as long as I remember" he gripped your hips and gave it a squeeze as you kept mumbling sinful words in his ear, the sensations increased in the pit of his stomach as your movement got faster, the sound filled the room and it made your cheeks feel warm, you were dripping but this wasn't about you at the moment, it was all about him as it should be. "Without you I'm nothing my god..just want to serve you, pleasure you and worship you all my life" his breath came out in shuddering waves as you whispered in his ear, 

"Mmmhmm..that's right baby..I own you my darling, I own your whole existence" 

"You do..cum for me please..need your cum" you begged him and he obliged, he was tipped off the edge as soon as you decided to play to his ego. He moaned your name as he let go, your hips continued to move on his thighs as you watched him fall apart with such intensity. You scooped his cum on your fingers and for a moment he thought you'd lick it but you had something filthier in mind, he underestimated your Virgin self at times, you lifted your hips up and your fingers sneaked inside your panties, you rubbed his cum all over your lips and the lewd action made you both moan simultaneously. 

"Touch me daddy please" you placed your head down on his shoulder as you whined, you felt so close already that you didn't need much stimulation, he took your night dress off and then pulled your underwear down, your wet dripping cunt seemed inviting. He scooped the rest of the cum from his torso and rubbed it over your clit then his thumb rolled in circles over the swollen nubs, your juices soaked his hand almost immediately.

"You're such a pretty girl you know that? So breathtaking" He grabbed the back of your neck with the free hand and kissed you tenderly "Cum for daddy my little girl" 

That was enough to make you fall apart, your world spinned as the orgasm washed over you. You both fed into each other's kink today and it was a liberating experience, you also managed to get him off again without giving into his need to extremely hurt himself. He grabbed you in his arms like a baby and you both showered, after dinner as you both got in bed you asked him about Thor but he didn't say much. 

He couldn't have told you that Thor wanted to hurt you, he didn't want to scare you, his brother thought he was doing the right thing finally but it wasn't right, not for him, anything that harmed you could never be right in his eyes and he'd protect you even if if meant that he'd have to hurt his whole family.

"Please don't hurt me ..i always did whatever you asked me to" Natasha told him. She was scared, she had a child now and now she understood the pain she had put those kids through at the center. The man in front of her terrified her, the fact that he found her even after she changed everything about herself shocked her. She didn't know how he got inside her apartment even when there were cops outside her building on the patrol. 

"Hurt you? Oh no my sweet disciple I'm not here to hurt you, I'm here to take you away with me...this time I'll fulfill the ritual. Blood of a virgin, she's still a virgin..that little girl is still pure and I know where to find her" 

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