Loki Laufeyson – Never ruin an apology with an excuse
Loki Laufeyson - Never ruin an apology with an excuse
My name hung in the air like a fog, filling the room with an eerie silence as everyone stared. The reporter's pens scratched their papers in a chaotic, uncoordinated rhythm while their inquisitive eyes roamed over me. Suddenly, one man mustered up the courage to speak. He stepped forward and adjusted the glasses perched on his nose before turning his attention to Thor. "So." He began, slowly moving his gaze towards me. "What exactly will Loki's role be on this team? We all know about his past... Will there be any boundaries or limitations?"
Thor's steel gaze met Tony's. A look of understanding passed between them and I found myself holding my breath for his answer. The tension was palpable as they stood in silence for a moment. Finally, Thor broke the stillness with conviction. "Loki will have a key role on this team." He declared. "The specifics of it will depend on the situation, but ultimately it is up to us to decide how best to use him."
The room filled with a cacophony of murmurs and whispers, each chatter becoming clearer and more distinct as it seemed to be centred around me. The atmosphere had shifted, the air thick with unease. Everywhere I looked, hands were frantically waved in the air as Tony stepped in to take control of the situation, motioning for Thor to step back so he could address the riled up crowd.
Tony stepped forward, his face stern yet gentle. He raised his hand to quieten the outcry of disapproval. He spoke in a soft but firm voice. "Loki has had a troublesome life." Murmurs of dissent echoed around him, yet he remained unmoved. "But I believe with our help and understanding, he can get back on his feet and find his redemption. As far as what part Loki plays on this team, that is still to be decided. His health is gradually improving and soon enough his strength should allow him to utilise his magic again." A faint glimmer of a smile tugged at the corner of Tony's mouth.
The reporters exchanged wide-eyed glances and whispered to each other, their confusion palpable. I had to physically bite my tongue to prevent a snort of laughter from escaping as I felt my lips quiver with a mixture of emotions - shock, disbelief, and despite myself, excitement. I hadn't known what to expect when Ms Romanov explained I would be involved in this conference, but I'd assumed I'd be facing it alone. Tony was doing his best to keep the situation under control and I couldn't have been more surprised by his support, standing beside me as an unexpected ally. The press conference slowly retreated into an oppressive calm as Tony stepped back, giving the floor back to Thor.
Thor nodded his head in approval before beginning again. "Loki is a powerful being, and although his past actions may not reflect it, I can assure you that he is capable of great things." His voice echoed throughout the room, the intensity in his words reflecting the conviction with which he spoke, leaving no doubts in anyone's mind whether he believed in what he said. I could feel the tension slowly begin to dissipate as everyone accepted his statement.
A stocky man pushed himself up from the crowd, his beefy arms crossed defiantly over his chest. His face was pinched with contempt and his eyes glinted with malice as they met mine for a brief moment before he directed his attention to my brother. "What about the Chitauri?" He asked, his voice loud and clear. "Are you saying that Loki had no part in their attack on Earth?"
The atmosphere in the room hung heavy with anticipation, as if all the oxygen had been sucked out. An unbearable silence filled the air until it became oppressive and every pair of eyes was glued to Thor as they waited for him to speak.
"I am." Thor answered firmly, his eyes never leaving the man's. "He was manipulated by larger forces at work, though he can take responsibility for his own actions."
The reporter smirked. "But what if Loki betrays us again, like he has done in the past? Will you take that risk?"
Thor paused, and for the first time during this whole debate, I saw a slight hesitation in his eyes that froze me in place. His doubts were justified - I had been honest about my deceit since my re-arrival. Yet, there was something in his gaze that told me he wanted to believe me, even if he wasn't sure if he should.
In my moment of hesitation, I felt someone's eyes on me and I turned to meet Amelie's gaze. A renewed strength radiated from Amelie as her eyes met mine, sending an unexpected surge of courage to my heart. My throat opened and strength filled my veins. Focusing on her belief in me, I stepped forward and addressed the crowd with newfound confidence."I can make no promises that I will not fail you." I began, slowly lifting my chin. "But if given the chance, I swear that I will do everything in my power to prove myself worthy of your trust."
The crowd was silent after my outburst and I clasped my hands behind my back to help maintain my composure. I took a deep breath, steadying myself amidst the tension. Suddenly, a hand landed on my shoulder and I turned to find Thor standing beside me. His twinkling eyes held a mixture of admiration and pride as he gave my shoulder a firm squeeze. The whispers and murmurs that had filled the air before were now laced with a timid admiration rather than doubt. Tony smirked at the sight before us, his eyes dancing with amusement.
Every one of the Avengers seemed to recognise this moment for what it was - a sign of true progress, a show of hope for what could still be achieved. It didn't matter that there were still many questions left unanswered or lingering suspicions. I'd been accepted; cautiously and under certain parameters, but accepted all the same.
The reporters began to pepper us with a flurry of questions. They wanted to know about my past mistakes, and what I could do to prove myself. Thor handled the inquiries with grace, tactfully side-stepping any mention of my misdeeds while providing enough detail for the reporters to be satisfied. He answered every single one without so much as a pause. His answers were like a dance; artful and precise, with not a single misstep.
I stood back and listened intently, grateful for Thor's unwavering support throughout this whole process.
Finally, the conference came to an end, and the murmur of chatter once again filled the room as everyone slowly began to leave. That's when I felt a gentle tap on my shoulder; I spun around and saw Amelie standing there, her eyes still filled with that same understanding from moments before. She smiled softly and reached out to take my hand in her own. The warmth of her skin against mine stirred a wave of electricity that jolted through me. My legs quivered beneath its force, but I mentally steadied myself and smiled at her admiringly.
"I know you can do this." She said softly, her voice nothing more than a whisper against the noise of the dispersing crowd. "You don't have to prove anything to anyone else but yourself. Just take it one step at a time and remember, you are stronger than you think." She gave my hand a heartening squeeze as she finished speaking, giving me a sense of comfort I hadn’t realised I needed.
Amelie smiled at me knowingly, her eyes conveying a sense of understanding. In that one moment, I felt so much more than just gratitude for her - I felt as if I had found something sacred and unspoken within myself. Something powerful and yet fragile, something that could never be taken away. A feeling of immense admiration swept over me as I gazed into her eyes, held captive by her support and assurance. Her kind words acted like a warm embrace, giving me inner strength and confidence. I held so much respect for this mortal... this woman, who had remained at my side despite all the accusations against me, and my heart swelled as I looked into her steady gaze, brimming with both faith and optimism. At that moment, I realised a depth of understanding that could never be expressed in mere words.
The most powerful and sincere apologies can never be uttered, they have to be expressed in tender action or quieted through a warm embrace. My guilt was wordlessly conveyed through my silence, and yet it became the loudest apology of all. It was communicated through an enigmatic stillness, to such an extent that it seemed to fill the space between us like a tangible force. I bowed my head quietly, my only acknowledgement for the hurt I had caused.
In an instant, the very soul of this world had been unveiled before my eyes in all its breathtaking grandeur, and she stood before me now.
Suddenly, my arrogant and lifelong notion that I was worth more than any other creature on Earth disappeared. The entire universe unbarred itself to me as surely as if the gates of paradise had been opened. No one knows what is coming next in this river, there are no guarantees. We can only surrender to it and ride along with our eyes focused on the far shore. Each individual life matters just as much as any other living thing in our vast universe; we all belong here equally to share in its beauty without judgement or comparison.
The planet known as Earth spun at twenty-eight thousand revolutions every 60 minutes and travelled at sixty-seven thousand miles per hour around its star. The world was not travelling, yet its tiny spinning self carried the main bodies comprising the solar system, with all humans facing the sunset. The sun was blasting all its heat and light upon the nine planets that were projected on its mutable surface. As the heat was violently expelled from their surface into space, it circled the planet and returned to the sun in the form of an endless loop. This vision revealed to me that we were part of something much bigger than ourselves, something beyond human or even divine comprehension. Something that connected us to the infinite universe, allowing me to understand just how insignificant my mere existence was within the grand scheme of things.
The enormity of my realisation struck me with the force of a freight-train, and I struggled to comprehend the gravity of my newfound convictions that had settled in my core. I blinked, looking again to Amelie's eyes as she watched me, completely unaware of the shift that had taken place within me.
Silently, I gave her hand a gentle squeeze in return.
"Thank you, Amelie."