Loki Laufeyson - Heavy
Loki Laufeyson - Heavy
I swirled the whiskey around the glass, paying more attention to it than to whatever nonsense was on the TV.
We’d moved to the sofas. Thor and Amelie had bickered about what to watch before Banner made them flip a coin. As it was, my brother had won and we were now watching what he referred to as a ‘period drama’. Seemingly some kind of romance where there was never actually anything romantic happening.
I looked to the screen.
“How little of permanent happiness could belong to a couple who were only brought together because their passions were stronger than their virtue.”
I snorted quietly and took a large sip of whiskey. Looking around at the others, it seemed I was not the only one who was not enjoying the film. Amelie had fallen asleep and Banner was on his phone. Only Thor sat with his eyes glued to the screen. I rolled my eyes and smiled ruefully. Thankfully Banner had had the good sense to bring the bottle of whiskey to the coffee table…
What felt like en eternity later, the end credits finally rolled and I’d made my way through an entire bottle. Not a huge deal for a God, but enough to make me feel something. Dr Banner stood and stretched before downing the last of his beer. “Time for me to hit the hay. I haven’t stayed up this late in ages.”
Thor laughed. “It is still early Banner! Where is your sense of fun?”
Banner shook his head. “I know where you’re going with this. I’m not going out. Last time you kept me out all night.”
I rolled my eyes. If Thor was intent on going to a nightclub with Banner, then his mind would not be changed.
“Come Banner, you owe me a drink.”
“I don’t remember saying I’d buy you a drink.”
Thor laughed and clapped Banner on the back good-naturedly. “No, but you were quite drunk at the time. Come, I will call for a car.”
Looking exasperated, Banner watched as Thor simply headed to the lobby and I laughed quietly. “Go Banner, he’ll only hurt himself if he goes alone.”
He sighed and looked to Amelie who was still asleep on the sofa. “You alright with her?”
I swallowed and smiled tightly, not looking away from Banner. “Of course.”
He nodded before sighing again, resigning himself to a night out with Thor. I watched him leave and chuckled softly, not envying him. I sat quietly for a while before looking at Amelie. She’d slept peacefully through most of the film and showed no signs of waking any time soon. I frowned, should I leave her on the sofa to sleep? Or wake her to go to bed?
Quietly, I scolded myself for not asking Banner before he left. He’d asked if I’d be alright with her, what did he mean? Amelie sighed softly in her sleep and I felt my lips pull into a smile of their own accord.
I pondered his words. Could he see the inner struggles that I faced? The mere thought of lifting Amelie in my arms was daunting, and not because of her size. She was petite and anyway, for a God, such things were easy. This anxiety came from my overwhelming desire to hold onto her, a longing to gaze upon her face and feel the warmth of her body against mine. I hoped that Banner hadn’t guessed that.
Deliberating for a few more minutes, I decided to wake her. I didn’t want to frighten her if she woke up to me carrying her through the dark halls of the tower. I stood, moving closer to her and lowering myself. I placed a hand gently on her shoulder. “Amelie?” I whispered.
Drowsily, her head leaned into my hand and I placed my palm against her silky smooth cheek. I felt as if time had stopped and I could have stayed there forever, feeling the warmth of her breath tickle my skin with every exhale. My fingers moved delicately across her face in a mesmerising dance, allowing me to marvel at how flawless she was even in sleep. As the room became heavy with my emotion, I was captivated by the sound of her breathing - a lullaby that made me forget all else besides us. In that moment I wanted to never let go.
I looked around the room, trying to remember where I’d seen blankets in here before. I could just conjure one, my strength had been growing day-by-day and I was certain that such a small dose of magic would not push me too far.
As I deliberated, Amelie’s eyes softly fluttered open and I froze, my hand still cupping her face gently. Her eyes flicked to mine, half hooded and not completely focused, and I prayed she couldn't see the adoration that I was sure was evident in my gaze. “Loki?” Her voice was groggy and thick with sleep.
My stomach twisted slightly at the sound of it, wanting to bottle up each moment and take it with me. Just imagining her voice waking me up like this, realising that this would be what she’d sound like in the mornings, were I lucky enough to be by her side as she woke. If only I could be so blessed to hold her while she slept, to ease her into slumber and sleep peacefully beside her every night.
Her eyes fluttered closed briefly before opening again. She was struggling to stay awake. “You can go back to sleep Amelie. I did not mean to wake you.”
She smiled softly and closed her eyes again. “Will you take me to bed?”
I froze.
She wanted me to carry her? To her bed?
I felt a lump form in my throat as the beat of my heart rapidly increased. Carrying her in her sleep was one thing, but to hear her request for me to hold her - it ignited a fire within me. A strong surge of protectiveness coursed through my veins, and I tried to swallow as I felt a small but undeniable sense of pride that I’d somehow managed to make this woman feel safe enough around me that she would trust me this much. Like tending to her was the most natural thing I'd ever done, as if I were made for it. I tried to ignore the tremor of emotion that went through me as her eyes opened again, lazily focused on me. “You… wouldn’t mind?” I asked.
She shook her head softly before her eyes fell shut again. “Only if’m not too heavy.”
I breathed out a laugh and shook my head. “I highly doubt it.”
As carefully as I could, I moved my arm around her back and used the other to hold her legs. I lifted her easily, her head resting against my collarbone with her breath tickling my throat. Idly, she brought her hand to my chest, her fingers curled slightly and I wondered at how warm she was.
Slowly, I turned towards the corridor and began walking as gently as I could. As we moved, I smelt her perfume drifting up to me. She smelt of soap and something slightly floral, a pleasant smell that was undeniably Amelie.
We moved down the darkened corridor, heading for her room. I was careful not to jostle her around too much. I was also attempting to not think too much, she felt wonderful in my arms and my body yearned for her closeness. I swallowed, focusing my attention on the floor ahead. All too soon, I rounded the corridor and was at Amelie’s bedroom door. I rearranged her slightly so that I could get one hand to the handle.
It didn’t budge.
I frowned and tried again. Nothing.
I cursed silently. Of course it was locked, why wouldn’t it be? I looked down at Amelie, my eyes squinting as I tried to see what she was wearing. No pockets. Where did she keep her key? I looked around the corridor, hoping for a plant pot or a mat, anything she could hide a key under. Unsurprisingly, there was nothing of the sort.
I stood still. The only sound was Amelie’s steady breathing. This would definitely be too much magic for me at the moment.
Suddenly I felt embarrassed for not thinking of this earlier. All the rooms could be locked; I’d locked my own when I’d left. I could wake her up to ask...
Looking down at her sleeping peacefully, it seemed criminal to wake her.
I could call someone, but who? Thor would be drunk by now, he was an expert at smuggling Asgardian liquor, and Banner would have his hands full looking after him. Ms. Romanov, Clint, Bucky, and Steve were all out at some kind of sporting event, so they were unlikely to hear their phones. That left Tony Stark.
Somehow, the image of calling him and asking where to put his niece didn’t sit well.
I sighed, frustrated with myself and the situation. There was little light in the corridor, but I could see Amelie’s face. I looked at her, deliberating.
Finally, I made a decision. “Apologies Ms. Stark. I’m not sure you’ll like this.” I whispered.
I moved quickly down the darkened corridors, Amelie still cradled against my chest as I tried to ignore the feeling in my stomach. It had always seemed odd to me that the human expression for this feeling was butterflies. It felt more like a thunderstorm, as if my brother had hit me with lightening again.
I grimaced at the childhood memory, rounding the corner as we arrived outside my bedroom door.
For some reason I hesitated, questioning my own decision. Stark would definitely have something to say about this arrangement, but what else was I to do. I looked down at Amelie’s sleeping form and chewed the inside of my lip. I was certain he would accuse me of kidnapping his beloved niece if he even got a hint of where she was.
As if sensing my turmoil, Amelie sighed softly and nestled her head into the crook of my neck. I froze, resisting the urge to whimper.
Gods do not whimper.
Shaking my head slightly, I rearranged Amelie to allow me a free hand to unlock the door and tried to ignore how this pushed her tighter against me. Once inside, I backed up against the frame and clicked it shut. The room was silent. Only Amelie’s soft breathing broke the stillness of the dark. I hugged her tighter to my chest and pulled back the covers of my bed before lowering her gently. As her head hit the pillow, her arms wrapped lazily around my neck, her hands clasping behind my head.
I squeezed my eyes shut tightly, again trying to ignore the pounding in my ears as I allowed myself to enjoy the feeling of Amelie holding me to her. My body practically screamed at me to settle next to her, to cradle her all night against my chest.
I smirked in the dark. Amazing that after all the centuries I’d been alive, it ended up being a mortal who claimed my heart. Gently, I pulled her hands away from me, tucking her under the covers in the middle of the bed. I stood still for a moment, committing the sight of her in my bed to memory before conjuring a notebook and pen. Amelie would be confused when she woke and I did not want her to panic. The words came deliberate but slow, my conscience trying to drag out this moment, but I finished the note and propped it on the bedside.
Turning towards the door, my hand stilled as I reached for the doorknob. “Stop hesitating.” I whispered. “Just go.”
I glanced back. She was like a magnet, pulling me towards her with an invisible force that felt like it was tearing me in half.
Pressing my lips together tightly, I shook my head before returning to her side. When would I get this chance again? Slowly, I lowered my face to hers before gently brushing her hair away from her forehead. She truly was beautiful, only seeming to grow more so as we spent time together. I would give-in to myself just this once. Gods often took what they desired, but what I wanted was not something that could be taken... I would settle for a small indulgence.
Gently, I pressed my lips to Amelie’s forehead, breathing in deeply, and softly caressed her hair between my fingers before pulling back. As expected, rather than quenching my desire, my actions had fuelled it, fanning the flames as they threatened to consume me.
I sighed. “Goodnight Amelie.” I whispered. “Sleep well.”
Turning toward the door, I left, tucking a blanket under my arm and heading for the main lounge.