You Got Me Right Where I Wanna Be

𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢: 𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘪𝘦, 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘏𝘰𝘰𝘯'𝘴 𝘣𝘪𝘳𝘵𝘩𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘰𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘢 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘥

𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢: 𝘞𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘣𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘦𝘦 𝘵𝘰𝘥𝘢𝘺?

𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘯: 𝘐'𝘮 𝘧𝘳𝘦𝘦. 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘣𝘺 10𝘢𝘮

𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢: 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘶𝘯𝘯𝘪𝘦! ❤

///

𝘍𝘜𝘊𝘒

Nayeon's not one to lie. Really, she isn't. But telling Mina that she actually has something to do today would only disappoint the girl and who would want that? Surely, not Nayeon. And besides, cancelling a — perhaps.. important — appointment would be worth something if it's for Sunghoon. Come on, the boy deserves a little something for his special day and Mina deserves a hand to help her.

Nayeon purposely ignores the thought at the back of her head, scolding her: "Mina will understand. There's Jihyo and Momo to help. Sunghoon will have a party with or without you. And this is just you being selfishly delighted of a 'perhaps this could lead to something' moment with her."

That wouldn't be so true. Every moment with Mina can be a perhaps moment. Nayeon tends to believe on what most likely wouldn't occur because she hopes highly and further ignore consequential damage. She inflicts and restores, break and then mend. It's a never-ending cycle with all the perhaps that could bloom soaring hopes into Nayeon's chest only for it to wither in despair eventually.

The keys starts to dangle lightly in her loose grip and she walks towards her car with a frown.

"Hello, dad? Yes."

She opens the car door and closes it with not much force exerted, breathing a heavy sigh and an apology at the tip of her tongue. Oh, the things that she'd do just for this selfish delight.

"I apologize, sincerely, for my ability to attend this appointment we set might deem impossible considering the.. uh,"

Come up with something, let it roll off her tongue so naturally and that would do it. An access. A permission that would most likely to be granted. Then she'd see her again.

"Circumstances.. that in unfortunate fate has become a hindrance."

A chuckle escapes from the other line and Nayeon only smiles dumbly at her steering wheel.

"By any chance, is this.. hindrance named Mina? Takes the last name, Myoui, perhaps? I've figured you out already, so stop flowering your words."

A whine itches at her throat at the not-so-subtle teasing her father decided to put her through. And she's used to it really. After all, her father had seen it all: Nayeon's first cry, first walk, first academic achievement, her eventual success in life, her vulnerability, the words that she confessed to her father in a soft, feathery breath: "I'm deeply in love with Mina" as 15 year old Nayeon and her father has seen her daughter's eyes still chant the same exact statement at 23 years of age.

"Father," Her whine that itched and disturbed her had become one that's too unbearable to just let be. "Fine, it's Mina. It's just that it's Hoon's—"

"—Birthday," Her father finishes with a cheery chuckle. "I know, darling. Let your good old fella handle Mr. Cha."

Nayeon smiles. "Thank you, dad."

"Anything for my daughter. Oh and, before I forget," Nayeon frowns and stays silent for his father to continue his sentence (—that he for sure cut off intentionally to serve as "thrill"). "Stop chickening out, my daughter. I've raised you to be more than that. I'm rooting for you."

"FATHER!!"

///

𝘑𝘪𝘩𝘺𝘰: 𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢, 𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘔𝘰𝘮𝘰 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳.

𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢: 𝘯𝘰!!!

𝘑𝘪𝘩𝘺𝘰: 𝘩𝘶𝘩?? 𝘸𝘩𝘺??

𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢: 𝘶𝘩, 𝘏𝘰𝘰𝘯'𝘴 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘰𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘶𝘴𝘶𝘢𝘭 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘔𝘰𝘮𝘰 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘮.

𝘑𝘪𝘩𝘺𝘰: 𝘰𝘩

𝘑𝘪𝘩𝘺𝘰: 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘶𝘴 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳? 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘥𝘰 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧.

𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢: 𝘯𝘰 𝘯𝘰 𝘯𝘰, 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘦.

𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢: 𝘚𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘯 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘴 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘪𝘳𝘰𝘯 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘦𝘮 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘱𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦. 😅

𝘑𝘪𝘩𝘺𝘰: 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘳𝘰𝘯 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘦𝘮?

𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢: 𝘰𝘩 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨!

𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢: 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘑𝘪𝘩𝘺𝘰! 𝘚𝘢𝘺 𝘮𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘔𝘰𝘮𝘰, 𝘵𝘰𝘰 ❤

𝘑𝘪𝘩𝘺𝘰: 𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢???

𝘑𝘪𝘩𝘺𝘰: 𝘞𝘏𝘈𝘛 𝘐𝘚 𝘈𝘕 𝘐𝘙𝘖𝘕 𝘎𝘖𝘓𝘌𝘔, 𝘔𝘐𝘕𝘈

///

Mina places her phone on the table with a sigh of relief. She checks herself at the mirror once more (—for probably the hundredth time now). An overwhelming surge of agitation and light distress gnaws at her system with such unbearable persistence. But at the very same time, is the feeling of excitement and pure bliss at the tip of her heart at the thought of seeing Nayeon. Her heart skips a beat at the mere thought of the girl.

She takes a selfie with a nervous smile, ccompletely tainting the composed facade she tries to put on. But she sends it to Jihyo nonetheless.

𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢: 𝘑𝘪𝘩𝘺𝘰, 𝘥𝘰 𝘐 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥?

𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢: *𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘢 𝘱𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦*

𝘑𝘪𝘩𝘺𝘰: 𝘰𝘧 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰, 𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢. 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯?

𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢: 𝘐'𝘮 𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘰𝘶𝘴, 𝘪𝘵 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘐'𝘮 𝘨𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘯 𝘢 𝘥𝘢𝘵𝘦.

𝘑𝘪𝘩𝘺𝘰: 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘏𝘰𝘰𝘯'𝘴 𝘣𝘪𝘳𝘵𝘩𝘥𝘢𝘺. 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘥𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯? 😭 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘢𝘹, 𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢.

𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢: 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘭𝘺 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘥.. 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘩𝘺 𝘰𝘧 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘳𝘰𝘯 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘦𝘮. ❤ 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘑𝘪𝘩𝘺𝘰!

𝘑𝘪𝘩𝘺𝘰: 𝘍𝘖𝘙 𝘛𝘏𝘌 𝘓𝘖𝘝𝘌 𝘖𝘍 𝘎𝘖𝘋, 𝘞𝘏𝘈𝘛 𝘐𝘚 𝘈𝘕 𝘐𝘙𝘖𝘕 𝘎𝘖𝘓𝘌𝘔.

///

Mina giggles at the last message Jihyo sent her. One that which she will not send a reply to.

Her gaze averts right back to her reflection on the mirror. She inhales and then exhales. Her eyes flash subtle determination tainting her soft gaze.

"I can do this. It's just Nayeonnie." She breathes. "A-and Nayeonnie can't possibly turn away from me if I spoke of the truth, would she? She wouldn't. Nayeonnie's too kind.."

"Wasn't that the sole reason of falling for her, Mina?"

Knock. Knock.

A smile forms on her lips as she walks towards the door.

'Calm breathes. Calm thoughts. Calm heartbeats. Calm down, Mina.'

Her way of comfort to herself will never serve justice in any court of law by the way Nayeon looks — so radiant and exquisite, all with her grace just with a simple bunny smile and Mina's on the verge of melting ; it's so Nayeon and it's so Mina to not stop slipping on the edges that engages her being in an eternal free fall for this woman.

"Hi, Mina."

"Nayeonnie, hi."

Mina smiles and Nayeon thinks it's way too delicately crafted to exist. God must've had crafted this being with his own hands using delicacy and unadulterated sublimity for such excellence as an outcome. Or is it that because Nayeon's just so.. fallen?

Nevertheless, Mina is one of the most — if not the only — exquisite being she had ever layed her eyes and heart on.

And it's so Mina and Nayeon, so heartwrenchingly Mina and Nayeon to keep these thoughts and feelings at bay.

"Come in." She manages to stay through rapid heartbeats and she can't help the smile that ought to form on her lips. She feels so excited to share the same space with Nayeon again, alone.

"So, what's the plan?" Nayeon smiles cheekily.

"Simple but thoughtful."

"Have you bought materials yet?" Mina shakes her head that settled confusion in Nayeon.

"I wanted your help because you're good at this," Mina looks at the floor to hide a subtle blush but Nayeon's quick to notice with sudden giddiness. "You know, you're creative. And I know Sunghoon best. We'd make a great team for this, don't you think?"

Nayeon laughs lightly. "You're creative too, you know. You're just shy to share your thoughts."

Mina grins at her. "That's you being kind and lying to me."

"Nope," Nayeon in immediate action shakes her head. "This is me stating honesty and encouraging you. Come on, let's go buy some things."

Nayeon smiles at her and proceeds to walk out the door, leaving a flustered Mina trailing behind.

///

"First of all, we should need ingredients for a cake." Nayeon says in a matter-of-factly tone to which Mina hums in agreement to. They stroll around the grocery store sharing thoughts and ideas about the party.

"What's the design of the cake? Something that would.. make sense and visually tell Hoon that 'it's me, Mina, your sister made this for you'." Nayeon says amidst searching for flour. Mina frowns and thinks about Nayeon's question — that if constructed in simple words: what would associate her to Sunghoon as his sibling?

She tries hard to think of something and ends up temporarily deaf to Nayeon's suggestions. Until Nayeon notices that Mina's deep in thoughts and instead takes interest in the way Mina is walking a little rushed. Nayeon smiles fondly at her.

"Mina."

"Minaaa."

"Mina!" That snaps her back to reality — a reality in which Nayeon is looking at her like that and it makes her heart flutter and the fact that she couldn't come up with anything.

"You were walking too fast. Wait, actually — you were waddling."

A sudden imaginary light bulb illuminates beside Mina's head. Nayeon's a genius!

"You're right! You're a genius!" Says Mina amidst her happy dance. As much as Nayeon wants to take a video of Mina doing that, she frowns and asks, "Why, exactly?"

"Penguins! We both like them and people say we waddle too!"

Nayeon's mouth forns an 'O' at the sudden realization.

"That's gonna be such a cute cake."

"But penguins are adorable. Wouldn't it be hard to eat them?"

"Right," Nayeon chuckles. "Penguins.. they aren't that hard to adore but if it's dessert, oh, Im Nayeon wouldn't let anything hinder herself to get a taste."

Mina laughs at the funny expression Nayeon puts on.

Nayeon smiles and leaves the end of the sentence unsaid: "—especially when your hands made it, Mina"

They continue walking down the aisles with Nayeon pushing their trolly listening to Mina's bittersweet rants about her younger brother. "You know, when we were kids.. I wanted him to grow quickly." Mina confesses and it suddenly feels bitter to think about that in the present.

"Why?"

"Because I found him annoying when we were young. He'd bug me and question dumb things and force me to make him food," Mina chuckles. "I never expected it to be this hard — to see him growing up."

Nayeon stops pushing the cart when Mina halts.

"Now that it's here, that he's turning the age he is now.. it makes me want to have my stubborn, dumb and annoying younger brother back who used to whine everyday."

Nayeon never knew how that would feel for she was the only child. Now that she thinks about it and tries to figure out how would that exactly feel like, she can't help but place a hand on the younger girl's shoulder with the intention of comfort. She rubs her thumb on the soft texture of Mina's clothing, causing Mina to look at her with eyes that would render Nayeon breathless. Mina is always breathtaking.

"Sunghoon was a kind kid — he'd always tell me how good of a sister you are, treat me candy and said that as payback I should treat you instead," Nayeon can't help but chuckle at the memory. While Mina's cheeks burn up in a rosy color, her skin kissed with a light shade of pink as remembers why her brother did all of that.

~~~

"Mina unnie, I gave Nayeon unnie her favorite candy—" little Sunghoon pauses with an adorable smirk plastered on his face, his eyes lighting up in such mischief that Mina doesn't even try to surpress an upcoming shudder.

Sunghoon has been nothing but a menace to her ever since he found her diary — a notebook that she took great care of, hidden carefully where she thought no one would look into. But her nosey brother, one day, decided to barge into her room with his lips in the form of a playful grin and searched for the toy he lost inside his sister's room. And that was when he found something. A notebook. Hidden under the bed. And may or may not have discovered the love Mina had in store for someone.. for a someone, that unfortunately for Mina, Sunghoon knows very well.

"Oh God, what did you tell her this time?"

"In return, she would take you out on Sunday and you two will buy ice cream together." Mina's cheeks heat up in a bright shade of red at the thought of her and her long-time crush having a.. friendly date. With ice cream and joyful conversations and synchroned heartbeats and teenage fun.

Hell no.

"Hoon!! I told you not to do this again." Mina scolds him as she ignored the flutter in her chest, the heat in her cheeks, the twitching of her lips. Sunghoon? Well, he looks unconvinced.

"But Nayeon unnie said yes."

And that's all Mina needed to know. Two seconds later, she envelopes her brother in a hug that told him "i-hate-you-but-thank-you", which made Sunghoon smile and hug his sister back.

~~~

"Now that I think about it, I wonder why did he did that almost all the time?" Mina was pretty sure her face was bright red and she hopes Nayeon would act blind to that particular fact, which Nayeon did, thankfully.

"He's.. honestly, I don't really know either." Mina says with a shy smile. Nayeon just shrugs.

"Anyways, don't think about it too much. Sunghoon's still your younger brother. He will always be." Somehow, it lifts up the weight that seemed to dig right through Mina's heart. And although it left a hollow spot, Mina's sure Nayeon will fill it with her name and voice and laughter soon. Because in times like these, Nayeon always knows what to say and Mina will always be grateful for that.

"Thank you, Nayeonnie. What would I do without you?"

Nayeon smiles and her heart swells, something stirs deep inside her stomach — "You're welcome. I always got you."

///

Nayeon witnesses Mina's skills in baking. And she must admit, the girl would be considered quite a connoisseur with kitchen utensils and a couple of eggs and flour — it was amusing to watch, honestly. Especially when Mina sticks her tongue out when she's (adorably) serious in stirring some mixture in a bowl. Or when she sighs when she pours a little too much than needed. Or when she smiled and clapped her hands when she was finally done.

It warmed every cold edges in Nayeon's heart to see Mina do the simple things in life, and yet still look so gorgeous in her eyes. Mina.. she was something. Mina looks mesmerizing with her apron on and with a messy bun. Mina sounds heavenly when she hums amidst a task. And Nayeon just seems to keep on falling for every little thing Mina does.

Mina warms her heart. Mina makes her smile. Mina makes her do stupid things. And Mina makes Nayeon feel contentment.

"Hey? Nayeonnie, are you okay?" Mina asks after she had caught Nayeon staring at her for multiple times now and she worried she may have something on her face or a part of her clothing had a small rip or something.

"Oh, yeah. I'm fine. I-I'll just.. finish.. these.." Nayeon clears her throat with a blush evident on her cheeks.

"Okay.."

Mina wonders what's going on with Nayeon.

Nayeon wonders what it would feel like to tell Mina she loves her.

—And Mina also wonders if Nayeon's cheeks are still okay with all the blowing of balloons she has done.

"Unnie, let me help you." Nayeon doesn't protest because her cheeks are starting to ache now (—she refuses to consider the possibility it may have been because she kept on smiling).

(Nayeon finds her adorable with her now round cheeks when she blows the balloon.)

"Random topic, but I think Sunghoon has a crush on someone." Mina frowns and continues to blow the balloons. Nayeon laughs.

"Of course he's gonna be crushing on someone. I mean, he is already 18 years old."

Mina nods then she looks at Nayeon after tying the balloon. "The annoying thing is, he won't tell me who," Mina huffs. "It's quite frustrating when he tells me about this person and yada-yada and I won't get a name for all the cheesiness I had to suffer from — he sounded so smitten I had to prevent a vomit to come through."

Nayeon just laughs at her even more which made Mina glare at her. "Sunghoon must be shy."

"Not an excuse," Mina rolls her eyes. "He had found out about my feelings for someone long ago—"

"Wait," Nayeon cuts her off with an almost shaky voice. "Y-you have feelings for someone?"

Mina eyes went wide upon realizing the situation she had put herself into. It was silent when she said nothing and instead pressed her lips firmly against each other with words stuck in her throat.

Oh God.

But when Nayeon had to look at her like that, like displeased, she knew she had to say something.

"I- yes."

Nayeon blinks.

"Oh."

Nayeon wasn't expecting that. Not at all. And sure it had caused her more than an ache in her heart, but she forces through the emotions with a smile. The ache can wait. She just can't break in front of Mina.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Nayeon grins, gripping on the balloon she had yet to blow tightly.

And Mina seemed to be very nervous about the topic they had just opened. So much that her palms became sweaty and her eyes starts shifting at anywhere than Nayeon's eyes.

(And Nayeon thought it was a good thing. Because she was sure her smile didn't quite reach her eyes.)

"I- uh.. it's pointless if I did."

"Still, aren't I your best friend?"

"Yeah.. I-I was just embarrassed about it." Mina bites her lip in an attempt to prevent herself from saying more than just that. It was silent. It gets harder to breathe. Mina looks at Nayeon, and she finds a smile. "How long?"

Is this gonna be it? Is this the part where I say it has always been her?

"Since I was 14."

"Oh. That long?"

Mina nods reluctantly.

Nayeon didn't hear a crack, she heard a shatter. And for now, she forces herself to act appropriately. To act as if it didn't faze her.

𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘴𝘰 𝘶𝘯𝘧𝘢𝘪𝘳, 𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢.

"Th-that's.. I don't even know. I just feel betrayed that you'd tell Sunghoon first than me and hid it for so long." Nayeon chuckles and nudges Mina with a playful grin. It was such a great act.

"I-I didn't! He found out himself."

"Yeah?" Nayeon feels uninterested in what Mina's saying for the first time. She feels hurt not because she didn't know, but because Mina had someone else for so long. And Nayeon has had her heart restored for Mina for so long and it took a single confession for it to wither.

And it felt so unfair.

They were embraced by the awkward silence. Mina's heart starts beating fast because maybe this is it: the part of her life where she finally tells Nayeon she loves her. And the part of her life where she can finally look and hold Nayeon the way she wants to. The way she had always yearned for.

"Nayeonnie—"

"Does—"

Mina chuckles awkwardly. "Oh, sorry. You continue."

"Does the person know?" Nayeon asks. Mina spoke internally: she's about to.

"I'm about to tell her. Today."

Nayeon bites her lip to prevent a sob that so achingly scratched her throat. That would mean one thing: Nayeon knew this person Mina loved.

When Mina notices the crestfallen look the older had on, she asks carefully, "How about you, Nayeonnie?"

Nayeon looks up at her. Eyes glistening with unshed tears. She hopes Mina doesn't give attention to that.

"Hm?"

"Have you ever been in love?" Mina sounded so vulnerable when the question slipped off her tongue. Nayeon wants to sob and tell her all the things she hadn't told her before. She wants to tell her it's her! It was always her.

"...Once."

Mina gulps.

"How'd it end?"

There was this silence again. But now it wasn't awkward. Nor uncomfortable. But the silence had made something inside Mina scream in agitation. Her heart pounded so fast she could feel the blood rising up to her face because Nayeon is looking at her. Nayeon looks at her in a way indescribable and in a way that's so full of admiration but somehow crestfallen. Nayeon looks like she wants to cry — cry out of frustration, cry out of pure admiration, cry out of disappointment. Her eyes looked messy with emotions but had the ability to stare right into Mina's soul.

"It hasn't."

Mina's breath hitches.

And Nayeon wonders what a life without Mina would be like.

///

𝘑𝘪𝘩𝘺𝘰: 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨.

𝘑𝘪𝘩𝘺𝘰: 𝘣𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘺

///

"Hey, uh, Hoon's gonna be here soon."

Nayeon nods. "I'll get the confetti."

Mina frowns at the way Nayeon had acted. It had seemed like she was being distant with her for the past few minutes and Mina can't but get bothered by it.

"Hey, Nayeonnie?"

"Yeah?"

When Nayeon looks at her, she looks tired. And Mina's chest aches for some reason so she shakes her head and lets Nayeon grab the confetti.

Nayeon grabs her phone and texts her dad.

𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘯: 𝘥𝘢𝘥, 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘥𝘶𝘦

𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘯: 𝘐'𝘷𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴. 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘐 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘰𝘱𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘶𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳?

𝘋𝘢𝘥: 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘢 𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦? 𝘮𝘺 𝘥𝘢𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘦𝘳? 𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥?

𝘋𝘢𝘥: 𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵, 𝘯𝘰 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘸𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘦𝘹𝘤𝘦𝘱𝘵 𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘷𝘦𝘴. 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘦𝘳, 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘳𝘺?

𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘯: 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘪𝘥 𝘪𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧, 𝘥𝘢𝘥. 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦𝘴 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘦𝘭𝘴𝘦.

𝘋𝘢𝘥: 𝘸𝘩𝘰?

𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘯: 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘦𝘹𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘭𝘺.

𝘋𝘢𝘥: 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘵 𝘪𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶?

𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘯: ...

Nayeon's mouth opens and closes dumbly.

𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘯: 𝘍𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘭𝘶𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭.

𝘋𝘢𝘥: 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘦

𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘯: 𝘰𝘬𝘢𝘺, 𝘥𝘢𝘥. 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳. 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦, 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵?

𝘋𝘢𝘥: 𝘰𝘧 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦. 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦, 𝘢𝘤𝘵 𝘰𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴. 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘧𝘪𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘢𝘨𝘰, 𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘯.

𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘯: 𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘪𝘵.

///

"Happy birthday!!!"

A series of cheers erupt from all of the guests that attended Sunghoon's birthday celebration. And among all of the smiles from families and friends, Mina's smile was the brightest.

Sunghoon laughs and says through tears that he half-expected the surprise party because Momo kept rambling about the cake that was waiting for her at home. They all playfully glared at Momo but the girl wasn't even bothered.

Nayeon was the one who held the cake for Sunghoon to blow the candles (Nayeon had took hundreds of pictures of the cake because it was adorable and Mina made it). They all sang him a happy birthday and Sunghoon's smile was as bright as the colors that adorned the room.

"Thank you so much!!"

"Your sister decorated the room."

Sunghoon grins and turns to hug her sister. "Thank you, unnie!"

Mina shyly hugs him back and says, "Nayeonnie helped too."

Jihyo eyed Mina and clicked her tongue, seemingly connected the puzzle pieces already. "Ah, Nayeon helped..."

"I just blew the balloons to be honest."

Nayeon jokes that causes a chorus of laughter from the people in the room.

"Thank you, Nayeonnie. I wouldn't have done this without you." Mina smiled at her gratefully and despite the ache that she feels when she sees her, her smile still warms her heart.

"You're always welcome."

Momo clears her throat because the two had been staring for a while and she was hungry.

Jihyo starts asking Mina what an iron golem was and felt really betrayed when she knew what it was.

Sana and Dahyun kept on kissing Sunghoon's cheeks which embarrassed the boy because his classmates were around (—with Tzuyu taking pictures and Jeongyeon and Chaeyoung smiling like proud moms).

And Nayeon decides to save the boy from his misery because:
1. it's his birthday
2. she has a favor to ask

So she excuses Sunghoon and drags him all the way to the kitchen to talk in private.

"Thank God you pulled me out there, it was suffocating."

Nayeon laughs at him.

"Why did you drag me here though?"

Nayeon scratches the back of her head sheepishly while she fidgets something that's located in her pocket.

"Before anything else, I want to wish you a happy birthday, Hoon."

"Oh God, I do not want an emotional speech unnie!" Nayeon rolls her eyes at him.

"No, dumbass. I dragged you here for a favor."

"And what makes that any less worse?"

"Don't be dramatic."

Sunghoon huffs and crosses his arms.

Nayeon sighs.

"Look, I discovered earlier that your sister likes someone. And I want you to know that I have been in love with your sister for almost a decade now."

Sunghoon's eyes widen and his jaw almost touches the group upon hearing what Nayeon said. But he chooses not to say anything yet and let his unnie finish.

"And I want to tell her today."

Sunghoon bites back a squeal and Nayeon just laughs at him because he looked stupid.

"And unnie, your favor?"

Nayeon pulls out a candy from her pocket and gave it to the younger. Sunghoon took it with confusion written all over his face and Nayeon smiles before saying, "Give that to her." She says as she stares at the mint green flavored mentos. "And tell her that in return, she has to spend time with me after the party. At the park."

Sunghoon looks at her, amused by Nayeon's lame approach. "Unnie, are you seriously.."

Nayeon shrugs. "That's what you did before."

"Fine then," Sunghoon says as he tucks the candy in his pocket with a wide smile. "I'll give it to her. Oh and good luck."

Sunghoon smiles at her before winking and walking away. Nayeon just can't slow down her heartbeat.

///

Mina frowns.

For the entire party, Nayeon hadn't said a word to her and it was honestly concerning. She kept on thinking what did she do for the older to act so distant to her. And yet she couldn't think of any.

Whenever she approaches her, Nayeon would somehow escape from her the moment she gets the chance to and avoids bumping into her. She stayed with Sana and Momo all throughout the party and acted as if Mina had been a ghost.

It pained her to experience this kind of treatment from Nayeon. But she doesn't say anything anyways.

She looks around and almost all of the guests have gone home, except a few of their friends who were drunk on the couch but there was still no Nayeon. She sighs and decides to just sleep the bothering feeling off.

However, Sunghoon rushes to her side and blocks the way to the stairs. Mina raises an eyebrow at him.

"First of all, I would like to thank my awesome sister for a blast birthday party," Mina playfully rolls her eyes and smiles. "Second, someone wanted to give you this."

He handed her a mint green flavored mentos candy and Mina's forehead creased.

"What for?"

Sunghoon shrugs with a mischievous grin — the one he had on back then when he had set her up with Nayeon.

"I don't really know. But the sender wanted to meet you at the park in return for this candy."

Mina's heart skips a beat and Sunghoon smirks at her, sending a wink before he runs to his classmates to bid them good bye. Mina looks at the candy on her hands and smiles to herself.

Nayeonnie's such an idiot.

///

Nayeon just stares at the stars as she rides the swing. Her heartbeat against her chest felt so loud and strong that she starts sweating with agitation. The hands that she used to fidget with her clothes with starts to become sweaty too. Nayeon had never felt this nervous before. But she had also never felt this brave.

Her heart skips a beat when she feels a familiar presence beside her, quickly realizing who it was with their jasmine scent. She hears the faint footsteps getting nearer.

She doesn't turn to look at the girl that's had her heart held captive since forever. She hears her sit down on the swing beside her and feels her gaze igniting flames on her skin. Mina held so much power on Nayeon, it felt scary.

"The candy tasted great."

Nayeon smiles and looks at her hands.

"Yeah? I heard those were your favorite flavor."

"Where did you hear that?"

"From you. Maybe a couple of years ago. Hoped it was still your favorite." Nayeon chuckles and Mina gazes at her fondly. Her heart fluttered at the thought of Nayeon remembering such a small detail about her.

Nayeon sighs. And if Mina hadn't paid attention, she'd miss the way it had sounded like longing.

"Mina, when I told you I loved someone.. it was true when I said it hadn't stopped."

Mina bites her lip and listens.

"And you know, just now, I wondered if I had a chance to stop it, would I?" Nayeon caresses her hands to calm herself down.

Mina just can't look at her.

"But then.. I realized I have loved her long enough to know that I want to spend entirety with her. Do you know that feeling?" Nayeon looks at her as she asks. Her eyes shined, as if the stars were merely the reflection of her eyes. And once Mina looked, she couldn't look away.

"I do. I know very well."

Nayeon smiles.

"Because why would I stop what I feel for her when she makes me the happiest?"

It should hurt. Mina knows it should hurt. But then it didn't. Because Nayeon doesn't sound like she's talking about someone. It just feels like Nayeon's just talking to her and that's it.

It felt as if those words were said for her to know.

And Mina dismisses all possibilities of her assumptions becoming truth, because the pain that would await would break her like fine glass shattered on the floor. It would hurt and with Nayeon, it would hurt so bad.

"But she doesn't know."

Nayeon's voice drops in a sad tone, her smile reached up to her eyes as she looks at Mina but it didn't showcase the usual happiness that always resided in those eyes.

"She doesn't know that she makes me the happiest and therefore made me so miserable without her even knowing," Nayeon doesn't break eye contact with her and endured every menacing ache she felt in her heart.

For this is the part. This is the part where Nayeon tells Mina the confession that had always been stuck in her throat. Albeit bittersweet, at least Mina knew the way Nayeon's heart beated a certain rhythm whenever she's near. A rhythm that seemed to spell her name each and everytime. A rhythm that will keep on playing even when it became unbearable.

Again, it felt unfair. It felt so unfair to tell her she loved her when she knew damn well that Mina might've told someone else the same thing.

"And even if her heart chooses not to synchronize with mine, I will understand."

Mina almost tears up. 𝘈𝘭𝘮𝘰𝘴𝘵.

"Mina,"

Mina's heart skipped a beat at the mention of her name — so soft and fragile, as if it was the most vulnerable and delicate thing there is in this world. Nayeon spoke her name as if she treasured the word so much. And Mina doesn't know for how long will her tears remain unshed if Nayeon keeps looking at her like that.

"I've loved you once. When I was 15 and watched you playing minecraft. I fell in love with your simplicity because it was admirable — everything about you is."

Mina lets out a small gasp. Along with it was the tears she had now let go.

Nayeon was too much for her.

This love had seemed like pouring water into an already full glass, bound to spill all over and kept on spilling with the continuous pouring.

"I fell in love twice when you shyly asked a lick from my ice cream because you wanted to taste the flavor," Nayeon stands up and kneels in front of Mina, taking her hand into her own while looking straight into her eyes.

"I've fallen in love with you for so many times. But then I knew, when I saw you bake earlier.. with your unpredictable antics and adorable habits that I want to keep on falling for you again and again," Mina grips Nayeon's hands as she goes on with her confession. "When I saw you in your apron and your hair in a messy bun, you looked so imperfectly beautiful that I knew that you were a perfect sight to wake up at every morning."

Nayeon places Mina's hand into the beat of her heart.

"And if you truly have eyes for someone else, it's fine. I just wanted to let you know that I've loved you since and it hasn't stopped."

Mina bursts out in a sob and kneels with Nayeon, hugging her and buries her head in her neck.

"You're stupid and dumb. An idiotic fool." Mina hits her as she sobs.

Nayeon starts to tear up and takes all the hits with a defeated expression on her face.

"I'm sorry."

"You kept it for so long. Stupid!"

"..."

"Nayeon, you're dumb!"

"Mina.. you probably told the girl you liked about your feelings already. And I truly respect that, I-I just wanted you to know—"

"—And you're so dense and oblivious. I love you too, dumbass!"

"I'm so—" Nayeon blinks as her mind, with best attempts, tries to progress the words that left Mina's mouth. Had she heart that right? She must've been sleepy already—

"I love you too, Nayeon. Since I was 14 and saw you trip on literally nothing you idiot!" Mina sobs on her neck and Nayeon blinks.

"W-wait.."

"Since that day you let me taste your ice cream and smiled at me and acted all charming and stuff and since then you were all over my head!"

Nayeon breaks the hug to look at her carefully, still in utter disbelief.

"I love you too, Nayeon. So much."

Nayeon stares at her for awhile. Then slowly, her hands cups Mina's cheeks and caresses it. Carefully wiping her tears with the use of her thumb and smiling fondly at her.

"We're so stupid." Mina says. Nayeon wants to laugh because it's true.

"I love you."

Mina sniffs. "I love you too."

"Mina, I love you. So much. I love you and I have never loved someone the way I do with you. I love you," Nayeon tears up again. "It feels so good to be able to say that to you."

"I love you too, Nayeon. I love you so much."

They stared at each other for while.

Nayeon feels so fulfilled by just having Mina like this. This lovely feeling came rushing inside her system and it felt so good to finally be able to tell Mina the love she has for her. It felt so right.

"Mina."

"Hm?"

"There's one more thing that I've been wondering about."

Mina hums. "What is it?"

Nayeon's gaze slowly averts to soft lips that's stained with happy tears. Mina notices this and bites her lip. Nayeon swallows thickly.

"I always wondered how your lips felt against mine."

Mina rolls her eyes and chuckles. "Corny," She inches closer to Nayeon and the older's breath hitches. "But nothing's stopping you."

Nayeon was fast to capture Mina's lips in a long awaited kiss. It was worthwhile. And it felt so surreal. Nayeon can feel the blasts in her heart as if there were fireworks in it. And Mina could feel her cheeks coated with a bright shade of pink at the feel of Nayeon's lips moving against hers.

The kiss screamed longing. Mina slightly moans against the kiss when Nayeon bites her lower lip. They broke the kiss due to lack of air but the victory smile Nayeon had on warmed Mina's heart completely.

"I love you."

"I love you too."

Nayeon finally knows how it feels like to tell Mina she loves her.

///

𝘚𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘯: 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘺 𝘧𝘰𝘳

𝘚𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘯: ???

𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘯: 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘢

𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘯: 𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯 𝘴𝘩𝘦'𝘥 𝘮𝘦𝘦𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘤𝘩

𝘚𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘯: 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘦?! 𝘛𝘖 𝘔𝘠 𝘚𝘐𝘚𝘛𝘌𝘙?!

𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘯: 𝘸𝘦'𝘳𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢 𝘤𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘤𝘩 𝘥𝘢𝘵𝘦, 𝘊𝘈𝘓𝘔 𝘋𝘖𝘞𝘕.