Observatory addendum
“Well, this shirt is certainly ruined,” said Zemo with a wry smile. “What’s this. Your semen smells funny.”
“Thanks.”
“No, really. Sniff.”
“Do I have to…. I mean. I don’t really know what it usually smells like.”
“Not like this. It reminds me of something…. Have you eaten anything weird?”
“Nothing that you haven’t eaten as well.”
“Hmmmm. Ione.”
“Captain.”
“Please send down a fresh set of clothes for us, and identify the strange substance in the sample of James’ semen on this shirt.”
“Immediately.”
The clothes appeared in a neat pile on the table by the telescope, along with some toiletries.
“Ione, you think of everything. Thank you.”
“My pleasure, Captain.”
“You couldn’t rustle up some supper, could you, while we’re waiting,” asked Bucky, hopefully. “I’m starving.”
“Of course,” said Ione. “Any requests?”
Zemo just smiled indulgently and shook his head.
“I really fancy cheeseburgers, fries, milkshake, chicken nuggets, hot apple pie and custard,” said Bucky, stretching.
“On its way,” said Ione, and a few seconds later, it appeared on the table.
“Thanks, Ione,” said Bucky, tucking in.
“My pleasure,” said Ione, adding “Another shirt is standing by in case of culinary accidents.”
Zemo snorted, and reached for a burger. Bucky just grinned with his mouth full, and saluted the air with his cup.
“Captain. Identification complete. It is psychobillin asteroidus.”
“I suspected as much,” said Zemo thoughtfully.
“What?” asked Bucky, around a mouthful of apple pie.
“That fern you were touching. I didn’t see it up close, and I thought it was just Fernus ordinarius or Pteridium silvumbra. But now…”
“It was something else.”
“Indeed. It is in fact ‘Blinded by Lust’ or Luxuria caeca. It is quite a renowned plant. The locals call it ‘blinkered’ or ‘trust broken’ or ‘love lies bleeding’. It’s not found on Thema… well, until now… so I am hoping this is just a single specimen, maybe brought over as a spore in the shuttle craft. I will set up some biofilters.”
“It’s that bad, huh?”
“My James, I am only relieved that your superior metabolism was able to get rid of it so quickly. No wonder you were uncharacteristically jealous and over stimulated.”
“That makes sense. I wasn’t feeling myself. I was gonna say sorry.”
“No need. You actually weren’t of sound mind. I will ask the gardener to bring the plant to me.”
“You gonna destroy it?”
“Oh no. I’ve actually been wondering about trying it myself. I was going to use a drop of the distilled essence if I had to go through with the seduction of the Duchess.”
“It’s that good.”
“I’m told you forget everything except the need to possess the next person you see.”
“Freaky. I bet it sells well on the black market.”
“You wouldn’t believe how expensive it is.”
***