Tony Stark was never one for hugs. Physical contact in general wasn't his strongest area after New York. But even as a child, with only his mother offering loving squeezes, he found he only liked her hugs. Then she died.
Yet later, Peter Parker swung into his life. And Stark would be damned if he said that the kid didn't grow on him. He was smart, sweet and selfless as ever. But the kid liked hugs, the one thing Tony couldn't give the kid.
"Not there yet, kid," he would say. And Peter would back up, and be quiet. Because it was awkward, and honestly sad.
Tony gave the kid a suit, a spot on the Avengers, his time and attention. He didn't even mind contact too much anymore. He was an Acts of Service man.
He didn't want Peter to abandon him like Obadiah, ridiculous as that may seem. So he kept his physical distance, regardless of the kid's obvious adoration and love.
The boy was respectful and never complained, and Tony almost never thought about it, except when Peter slipped up.
Peter tried to hug Tony four times.
The first time was the car ride to Queens, a long and traffic filled trip, but the kid had a thrilling time just talking to the Tony Stark.
And Stark thought it felt nice, having someone clearly so innocent and pure on his side, even if he didn't deserve it.
But at the end of the conversation, Tony thought he'd get the door to encourage Peter out. He was surprised when the boy put his arm around him gingerly.
"No, I'm just getting the door for you. We're not there yet."
"Right, sorry," Peter replied quietly. He pulled his hands back and stepped out the door, mollified and embarrassed. "Bye Mr. Stark, Mr. Happy," and he closed the door as the car rolled forwards.
The second time, Peter and Stark stepped onto the elevator in silence. They had just tried to explain Peter's presence in the Tower to Nick Fury, and it had been... interesting.
Tony said he was a favored intern, while Peter bumbled and mumbled about being just another kid. Tony had shown a part of a rare soft side while Peter had unwittingly exposed his insecurities about his connection with Tony.
Peter was standing next to the control panel and Tony reached around to get it.
But Peter's arms wrapped around him, and Tony stiffened.
"Kid, I was reaching for the button."
The spider child stepped back and was quiet.
"Right," he said. As if this needed to be any more awkward.
We're not there yet, kid. Tony thought. He felt bad about embarrassing the kid, but he was so insecure about warm, fuzzy feelings.
The third time, Peter was in the lab working with Tony when a call from Fury came in.
"Jack Sparrow, how can I help you?" Tony drawled sarcastically.
"We found Cap."
The call disconnected.
That was all Tony needed to hear, and he called his suit, putting his hand up. But Peter was next to him, and the teen, confused, put his arms around him.
"Kid, did you not just hear the call?"
"Uh, yeah? Why?"
"Pete, I'm calling my suit."
Peter stepped away and blushed.
"My bad," he cringed.
But Tony was already in the suit, that had crashed through the window.
"Talk to you later kid! Go home!"
And Tony left Peter in the lab, confused and embarrassed.
The final time, was after Peter and Tony got back from a science convention, at about noon, the two were tired. Tony had brought a few interns with him, but Peter was the only one that came back to the tower to get a ride from Happy.
Tony was especially stiff, and decided to stretch himself a little bit.
"Yaaawwn," and put his arm out wide.
Peter, having felt with the embarrassment three times before, just hugged the Stark regardless.
"Peter, I was stretching." Peter sagged.
"Its so misleading every time."
But Stark disengaged and Peter walked off to meet Happy.
Stark winced at the innocence of the kid. It was refreshing but awkward. Lord knows he would do a lot for him, but he couldn't open up quite so quickly.
...
The one time Tony hugged Peter:
Tony always got angry because Peter never asked for help in serious situations. And lord knows that Peter sometimes got in serious situations.
But Tony knew the kid was tough. He got up after even the worst hits.
Until he didn't.
"Mr. Stark! Are you okay!?" Peter yelled. Tony had taken a small blast from a gun, but it was a strange, beam gun. Almost like Peter Quill's gun! Peter thought.
Tony got right back up.
"Yeah! I'm fine kid. Just focus on your fight."
Neither had had time to get comms in. So they were going old school, yelling at each other to stay in contact.
Out of the corner of Peter's eye, he saw someone running backwards, away. Clearly a criminal, the civilians had been evacuated a few minutes ago.
Mr. Stark was running strong. His suit was working well with the new battle intelligence updates, including rearview sensors and backup boosters.
In other words, it was extremely badass.
But he saw Peter flip over a building, and he yelled.
"Kid! Where are you going?!"
Peter heard him.
"I saw one go over here, Mr. Stark! I'll see you in a minute!"
(A/N: Sorry. But not really sorry.)
Tony rolled his eyes. The kid was always desperate to get every last bad guy. Let one free to spread the word!
But another guy with beam lasers aimed for the head, and Tony eliminated him with a 3,000 degree blast. Take that, asshole!
Peter snuck up on the last perpetrator of the law in front of him. He was... messing with the hem of his shirt? What the heck?
"What're you doing man?" Peter asked.
The man spun around. "Distraction, kid. Our plan must succeed."
The spidey-senses didn't go off at all. But Peter defidently heard the click of a gun behind him. He kept eye contact with the man ahead of him.
"Woah, woah woah man. I'm just doing my job. If you stand down and plead guilty you could be cleared within a day and we could all walk away."
"Well Spider man, unfortunately, your death was part of my contract. So, any last words?"
Peter's spider powers included super speed. So Peter flitted forward and to the side, trying to avoid getting shot.
He heard a bang, but there was no pain. As he stood to the side, attempting to climb up and web the men up- oh, wait. The gunman was a chick.
So Peter tried to web up the dude and the chick to get back to helping Mr. Stark.
Oh, yeah. He could ask Mr. Stark for help! But he had this handled.
As he aimed his webs, he heard another click, right as a cold barrel pressed against his side.
"Goodbye, Spiderman."
And a bang.
And Peter collapsed.
He was still conscious, but hardly. The blinding pain as the bullet tore a hole in his chest and abdomen was unimaginable.
The AI in his suit, Karen, spoke to him.
Peter. I am notifying FRIDAY of your injury. Mr. Stark will be here momentarily.
"Okay, Karen. But tell him it's not too urgent. Dont risk him getting hurt. I'm defidently down but not badly."
Are you sure Peter? You seem to have intense lacerations in your chest and abdomen.
"I'm sure Karen."
Tony had one guy left to go. He was a nasty bugger! A bigger beam than the rest and well hidden behind some steel poles Tony kept chasing him around. Note to self: make this stupid suit quieter!
Tony was almost on this man when FRIDAY gave him a small notification.
Sir, it seems Peter is injured. But he left a custom message. Play?
"Yes, FRIDAY," Tony whispered, ice flooding his veins. Oh God, was Peter okay? How bad was he injured? Where was he?
Peter wishes to tell you not to put yourself at risk. He is down, but not badly. "Dont risk getting hurt, It's not too urgent."
Tony rolled his eyes. What, the kid is suddenly backing out of the real fight? A brief annoyed look came upon his face, wishing the kid was fine so he could help nick this last guy.
A few long seconds passed, and Tony flew over and up, and shot a small grenade at the idiot. At 300 feet, it was satisfactory to watch the son of a gun die.
Tony took a deep breath.
Oh yeah, the kid.
So Tony flew over to the area where he'd seen Peter go.
Two men a few alleys back were running, and Tony shot the opposite direction.
Peter never let people get away.
Crap!
Tony never wanted to admit he liked the kid as much as he really did. He was sweet, and unconditionally nice. He loved to explore and talk. He was bright. Like a star and like a lightbulb.
And it would be a defident problem for the wrong doers of Peter Parker, because Tony cares about the kid. A lot. Almost like a son, regardless of his tough, non-challant exterior.
But Tony doesn't find Peter, and his anxiety grew.
"FRIDAY, ask KAREN where her location is."
The computer buffered for a minute, and then spurt out, "Next alley over, sir. But Underoos is in dismal condition."
Ooh shiit.
Tony shot over and landed next to the kid.
He lay on the ground, on his stomach.
A small pool of red surrounded him, staining the blue arms of his costume purple.
Tony's blood ran cold.
"Peter!" He yelled. The boy shifted. Just a little bit.
Stepping out of the suit, Tony was in his Jean's and AC/DC t shirt.
The boy was a few yards from him.
The 15 feet run seemed forever and so, so fast.
Kneeling on the ground, Tony rolled the bloody boy over, and gasped.
A huge bullet had found its mark right on his lower ribcage, likely puncturing his stomach and a lung.
"Hey, Peter, Peter. Wake up. Kid!"
Tony wailed.
Peter's eyes opened just a little as Tony cradled his head. Peter's pulse was almost gone.
"Kid, you gotta get up. Cmon, let's get you to the hospital. Why didn't you tell me you were shot?"
Tony asked softly. His voice was so quiet and laced with suppressed pain.
Peter's mouth opened, some blood spilling out.
"Not... there... yet. I'm... fine, Mr... Stark... Just gotta-" he exhaled a short, pained breath, and tried to move.
"Pete, no, Peter. You gotta stay down, keep breathing."
Pete fell back, slowly relaxing, an uneasy calm coming over his face.
"I'm sorry, I'm so tired, Mr. Stark." And his eyes slowly drooped, and his body started to relax.
"No, Peter. PETER! Please-"
Tony choked as the small, cheery, powerful teen exhaled slowly, not taking in another breath.
Tony pulled the kid to him, his dark blood staining his shirt, and held his head to his shoulder as it lolled back.
"Please kid, don't. Don't go. There's so much left for you."
His face broke as tears ran down his face.
"Kid, if you can hear me," Tony broke the sentence with a sob.
"Kid, we're there. Ill hug you if you wake up Please wAKE UP!"
He screamed in frustration.
Peter you were supposed to live to see my funeral, you were supposed to invite me to your wedding. You were supposed to see the update I made for your suit this week.
I was supposed to hug you back.
So Tony clutched the growing-cold body of a once vibrant Peter Parker to his chest, remembering with regret every time the kid would hug him accidentally.
He was just looking for someone to look up to, after all.
And his goodness made sure you got the bad guy. But... you lost him in exchange.
Peter's gone.
And suddenly Tony couldn't breathe anymore.
*****
Tony sat in his lab and listened to all the voicemails Peter had left him. Even the ones where all he did was ramble about school.
Every word the kid spoke struck Tony in the face. He should've loved the kid while he could. Because the kid never would know now, that Tony was going to hug him back next time Peter put his arms around him accidentally.
That he was going to invite Peter for a weekend at the tower, working in the labs. All that could've been, but would never be.
Because of a small bullet and a super hero boy.
Tears ran down Tony's face for the third time that day. It was quiet, so quiet up in the lab.
But then he heard an small voice come from FRIDAY.
Sir, Karen has sent me a file titled, "Give to Mr. Stark if I flatlined too long." Would you like me to send it to your computer? It contains three video recordings.
Just the title made Tony wince.
"Yeah, FRIDAY. Open it."
On the computer screen, Peter's face came into view.
"Hey Mr. Stark. So, I made this file in case something happened to me. I hope I never have to give this to you, but it could happen, right? So, I'm just making sure you know that you were the best thing that ever happened to me. I know you hate it when I accidentally hug you, but- oh never mind.
I don't want you to regret anything, even if my death was somehow, impossibly your fault. I made my choices becoming Spiderman, and I'm sorry I am causing you pain.
I'd hug you right now, if you're seeing this. You have a very harsh guilt complex." Peter sighed. "Bye, Mr. Stark."
The next video played.
"Hey Mr. Stark. Just making this one to tell you thanks again for everything, if I don't outlive you. If I... die. The suit is amazing, you are incredible, and Happy is a wonderful driver. I don't deserve any of this, but somehow I was lucky enough to meet you...
Even if I'm gone, I died grateful. And I will never let you down sir. I hope I went fighting for you or someone who needed saving.
Ha! Look at me, talking past tense already. LOL. See you Mr. Stark!"
Tony's tears were drying, replaced by a violent urge to scream in anger at the justice of the universe. The kid deserved everything. And the kid got shot instead, died in the arms of a mentor he thought didn't care about him.
But the third video played, and Tony almost crumpled.
It was Pete, his face pale, his mask off. A trickle of blood coming from his mouth. He was so, so weak.
"Mr. Stark... I just got shot. And even though I told you to stay and get your bad guy, I want you to hear my last words... whooh. Uh, so I started think of you kind of like an almost dad, I guess. Oh that was so cringe. I know we're not even close to that yet, you dont like all the accidental hugs and stuff, but..." Peter coughed violently. " I just wanted to say thank you. And... I'm so sorry I let you down. I promised..." and he fell into unconsciousness.
The video ended.
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