The Perseverance of Grief

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The Perseverance of Grief
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May 2017 (Part I)

 

AP exams were the first week of May and so most Midtown students were able to coast through the end of the school year. Midtown had won the decathlon championship with Ned answering the winning question about computer coding. Peter had dominated the physics and chem questions and MJ the English and history ones. Surprisingly Ben had attended the meet, but he kept his distance from the Leeds family and declined their invite to celebrate with dinner afterwards.

 

Peter was looking forward to summer. He had been pushing his body too much with being out until the early hours of the morning and dragging his body out of bed by 6:30 for school. Lately he was making more of an effort to spend time with Ned and MJ after school and waiting to go out in his costume until after dinner. Today was the last decathlon meeting where they would celebrate their win and say goodbye to the seniors.

 

Peter’s mouth started to water at the smell of pizza that had wafted into the hallway. When the trio reached the classroom, they saw that students had already started to dig into the pies that were spread out across desks. There was a low-hanging, handmade congratulations banner strung across the white board and a pile of yellow T-shirts with Midtown Decathlon Champions printed across the front stacked on Mr. Harrington’s desk.

 

Abe and Betty came over and pushed cups full of Sprite into their hands for their toast. “To Ned, who won us the trophy! And to the seniors!” There were scattered cheers before the other students went back to talking to their friends. In truth they all helped them secure the win, but people were giving the win to Ned as he had gotten the last question. Peter was happy for his friend who was too-often forgotten by some of their classmates due to his nerdy nature.

 

Ned thanked Betty and asked, “what are you up to this summer?” Most students at Midtown either got an internship through one of their parents or if they were like Peter and had no connections and no money, they got a job bussing tables or working a cash register. Peter was lucky he had The Daily Bugle but he also needed to find something else so he could start saving some of his money. Ned would be traveling with his family and MJ had an internship at a free legal clinic.

 

“My family and I are headed to Italy right after class gets out to see some of the historical sights and maybe visit The Vatican. My dad’s a history buff so he loves that stuff and my mom’s a foodie so it’s a perfect mix of both. What about you guys?”

 

Ned and MJ told her what they up to, but Peter wasn’t really listening as he wolfed down his third piece of pizza. He was planning on eating some left over for dinner later but if he ate enough pizza, he may be able to save it for tomorrow night.  

 

“Peter, what about you?”

 

He was caught off guard by being addressed directly by someone other than MJ or Ned. Most of his classmates gave him space after May and then he just never made an effort again. Beyond some polite greetings and helping some of his teammates with questions he hadn’t really socialized. “Um- just work. I take pictures for the Bugle. Mostly for their online articles, but um sometimes their print stuff. Maybe get a job somewhere else too, build up my resume ya know?” God he had somehow become even more awkward than when he was a freshman.

 

Betty’s smile was strained. She wanted to be a journalist and work for The New York Times writing stories about vulnerable populations and how the system was exploiting them. The Daily Bugle wrote stories on how mutants needed to be kept in check and social programs needed to be cut to lower taxes. “Of course! I didn’t know you were interested in journalism, or photography. That will definitely impress colleges.” Betty was being nice, The Daily Bugle on a resume was one small step above working for a local newspaper, but Peter appreciated the optimism even if it was forced.

 

Peter went to grab another slice, partially because he was still hungry but mostly to get away from that conversation. He didn’t need to hear them talk about their plans on how to get into a good college when Peter was more concerned about paying the utility bills and still saving enough to pay for applications.

 

MJ had followed him. “You know you could probably find something in biotech, maybe Oscorp would hire you after how impressed Dr. Connors had been with you. I bet you could find his email on their website.” Peter’s muscles tensed at the name causing his move to grab a slice seem stiff and awkward. “Or not, I guess.” She must have noticed his hesitation.

 

“No, you’re right, it would be interesting and may help with college later. I’ll think about it.” She was right, but he would not think about it. He would take cleaning tables over being surrounded by scientists that were dissecting the very animals that mutated him. If they ever found out what had happened, he would be next up on the autopsy table.

 

“Everyone, quiet down! Quiet down! I have a quick announcement that I think some of you will be excited to hear.” The room fell silent as everyone looked towards Mr. Harrington. “As a reward for winning this year’s championship a biotech company has offered our rising sophomores and juniors to apply to a college level internship where you will work along other interns on your very own project!”

 

Peter’s stomach sank.

 

Please don’t let it be Oscorp.

 

“This would be an exciting opportunity for you guys to get to work on your own project, full funded of course, and get a chance to work along other interns and scientists on their projects. This will be a paid position Monday through Wednesday and lunch and subway passes will be provided. Those of you interested will have to fill out a quick online application and interview in person. Only one spot is available.”

 

An overexcited voice called out from the back, “where is it?!”

 

“Stark Industries.”

 

Immediately everyone began talking over each other. Students turned to their friends to ask if they would apply and what they wanted to work on if they got it. Others shouted out questions, barely letting Mr. Harrington answer them before they asked another. Could graduates apply? No. How much would they get paid? He didn’t know. What projects would people be working on? He also didn’t know.

 

“Guys I know you are excited, but I told you all that I know. I will email the link to the online application to those that qualify and there may be more information there. You are also encouraged to ask questions at the interview. If any of you would like to go over the application process with me, please reach out. But for now, go back to celebrating your win.” Mr. Harrington didn’t sound frustrated with them, he sounded excited. To the best of Peter’s knowledge past decathlon winners didn’t get this opportunity which made this even more exciting.

 

MJ and Peter rejoined Ned and Betty who were already freaking out about the internship. “Do you think it starts right away? Cause my parents already paid for my flights so maybe I could wait until I’m back because I don’t want to miss the trip, but this would be amazing.” Peter had a hard time feeling bad for her dilemma. Plus, she wasn’t even into the sciences that much she just went here because her parents were doctors and wanted her to be one too.

 

“Maybe, I’m definitely going to apply for it. My family has travel plans too but they would understand what a big deal this is. Maybe they would let me do some programming. What about you guys?”

 

Ned directed the question at him an MJ. MJ looked bored as per usual. “I have my internship at the clinic so I’m out. Also, I’m not that interested in the sciences so it seems like it would be wasted on me.” The last part seemed to be meant for Betty who made no show of understanding what MJ was implying. Everyone was looking at Peter.

 

“Yea-yea of course. I mean it’s a long shot but why not?” Peter probably wouldn’t get it. He didn’t have any previous related work experience and if they asked for teacher recommendations, they would probably report that he did not participate in class, barely stayed awake during lectures, and kept his grades up either by sheer luck or divine intervention. Maybe Mr. Harrington would give him a good one though, he seemed to pity Peter and that could work to his advantage.

 

“Look! He already sent the link.” Ned shoved his phone a few inches from Peter’s face. There were times, many times, that Peter appreciated Ned’s enthusiasm, but there were still moments where his energy exhausted Peter. This was one of those days.

 

Peter gritted his teeth together as the other student’s voices were too sharp. He knew that if he stayed much longer he may have a full-blown panic attack. Maybe he should have slept more than four hours last night. And every night before that. He felt a soft touch on the back of his arm that made him open his eyes which he didn’t even realized he had closed.

 

It was MJ. “Let’s head out.” Peter was afraid if he tried to speak a gasp would come out, so he just nodded. Luckily Ned and Betty were still enthralled in conversation and barely noticed as they slipped out of the classroom. “You okay?”

 

Peter nodded. There was still concern in her eyes that indicated she wasn’t convinced. “ ‘m fine.” The mumbled words didn’t reassure her.

 

They made their way towards the subway station in silence. They were still more than 20 feet away from the entrance when the screeching of a train coming to a stop below them pierced Peter’s ears and he flinched. While MJ couldn’t hear the train, she noticed that Peter was becoming more tense and frazzled as they got closer. “Let’s walk another block, it’s a nice day.” They both knew it was a poor excuse, but Peter appreciated it.

 

They ended up walking all the way to Peter’s apartment, about thirty minutes in total. Neither said anything until they got to the door. “Thanks for walking me home.” He was thanking her for more than that and they both knew that.

 

“No problem, nerd. Good luck on the application.” With that she started walking in the direction they had come from. Peter didn’t even think about how MJ lived on the other side of campus, and she had just added another hour to her walk home. Feeling overwhelmed and guilty Peter made his way upstairs to his empty apartment.

 

-

 

They had emailed him right away to set up an interview for the following day. Peter had texted Ned right away.

 

 

Peter:

 

            They asked for an interview, what do I even

            wear????

 

 

Ned:

            Dude, that’s awesome!! Still waiting to hear

            Back. My mom said tie, dress shirt, khakis

            sport coat if you have one.

 

Something inside Peter clenched at the thought of having a mom to ask. Peter considered asking Ben, but the only formal thing he owned was his dress blues that he wore to every work event, wedding, and funeral. His dress blues were still hung on a hook on the back of his bedroom door from May’s funeral. There was no one to remind him to get it dried clean anymore.

 

 

Peter:

            I have dress shirt and khakis. No tie or

            coat though. Thrift shop later?

 

Ned:

            Yea man! I’ll head towards you, meet

            at Blank Slate?

 

Blank Slate was a coffeeshop near him that he frequented with Ned when they did homework together or needed a meeting place. They hadn’t gone in months as Peter busied himself with the vigilante stuff.

 

Peter:

            Sounds good man.

 

Thrift shopping for Ned was about finding whacky clothing or finding a good deal. Thrift shopping for Peter was just how he bought all his clothes. He frequented one so often that the guy at the cash register, Clyde, started holding science pun t-shirt for Peter. Those shirts along with flannels, jeans, and baggy sweaters made up the entirety of Peter’s wardrobe. They would start there first and then hit a few nearby.

 

Peter found a tie that wasn’t completely hideous at Clyde’s and a well-worn sportscoat that was a little big on him at the third one they went to. Ned found two Hawaiian shirts and a pair of Converse. He already had formal clothes if he got called for an interview. After shopping they went back to Peter’s empty apartment to rebuild some of the Lego sets they had done before as Star Wars played in the background. They lost track of time until Ned’s mom called at 8pm asking him to head home before it got dark.

 

That had been yesterday.

 

Today was the interview and Peter was running late. He hadn’t plugged his phone in so his alarm didn’t go off. He woke to Ben slamming the front door as he got home from the overnight shift. It gave him ten minutes to put on his new clothes, brush his teeth, attempt to tame his curls, and grab a pop tart on the way out the door. Luckily the subway came quickly, and he was able to run the last two blocks to get him there on time.

 

His enhancements kept him from being too sweaty when he arrived, but his clothes and hair were disheveled, and he did his best to fix it while not having a mirror. The lobby was quiet as it was a Saturday, but there was a smiling woman at reception that took his name and told him to take a seat. He didn’t wait long as the interviewer, Marcia, called his name only a few minutes after he arrived.

 

She didn’t look impressed at his appearance as she shook his hand weakly. “Mr. Parker, welcome to Stark Industries.” For the next fifteen minutes she peppered him with the standard HR questions. What are you plans after high school? Why Stark Industries? What are you hoping to learn from this role?

 

Peter had all his answers prepared and gave them all in a professional, but passionate way. Marcia seemed to be more impressed with him by the end. “Well now I will have you meet with one of the lab managers here who oversees the summer intern program. Her name is Dr. Miller, she specializes in biomedical tech. You may know her husband, I believe he works at Midtown Tech.”

 

Her husband was the chem teacher that Peter had been stealing supplies from. It now made sense why SI was offering Midtown decathlon an internship when they hadn’t done it for schools in the past. It’s all about who you know when it comes to getting a job in tech. At least he was meeting with the lab manger, that was probably a sign that he did well with Marcia.

 

Marcia keyed them up to the 47th floor of the tower where there were several labs walled off by tempered glass and offices surrounded with opaque, frosted glass. They found Dr. Miller’s office to be empty, so they headed down the hall to the intern lab where a woman was hunched over a table looking at one of the intern’s work that was sat next to her. They were the only two in the lab.

 

“Excuse me? Dr. Miller? I have Peter Parker with me, one of the Midtown Tech intern candidates.”

 

Dr. Miller looked startled as she must have been lost in the work. She gave Peter a warm smile and came over to shake his hand. “Peter it’s so nice to finally meet you. I remember hearing your name when you were in my husband’s class last year, he said you were a bright kid with an even brighter future.”

 

Corny, but nice of her to say.

 

“It’s nice to meet you ma’am, it’s an honor to be here.” Peter ignored the smirk of the intern who was still seated.

 

“Marcia, thank you for bringing him up here. I can take him from here and bring him back to reception when we’re done unless you had anything else for him?” Marcia indicated that she was all set and she gave him one last handshake before she left. “Harley and I were just working on ironing out some details of his project proposal. Can you give us a minute to wrap up and then I can show you around?”

 

“Oh-yea-of course. Take your time.”

 

Dr. Miller went back to the intern, Harley, and they went back to discussing his project. Peter let his eyes wander around the room as he tried not to eavesdrop. He did his best but even without his enhanced hearing he would have been able to hear everything in the quiet lab.

 

“The phosphorus levels in the water are way too high allowing the aquatic plants and algae to grow much faster than they should which is causing low oxygen levels and the fish are suffering as a result. The high phosphorus levels are most likely due to erosion and runoff from nearby farms, but because the source can’t be proven, and no one can be found to be at fault the government can’t stop the farms from using fertilizers that may or may not be polluting the waters with phosphorus. I want to find a way to identify genetic markers in the phosphorus that can then be tracked back to the farms. If I can prove that the fertilizers are at fault, then the government can step in, and we can prevent further damage to the river.”

 

“What research has been done on identifying genetic markers? It seems unlikely that would be able to find a marker that would be different between sources. What if all the farms use the same fertilizers and so all the tested phosphorus looks the same? What if each farm has phosphorus with many different genetic markers and so the samples are all over the place? You need a more concrete idea, right now this is too broad.”

 

She was quick with her critiques, but she wasn’t rude. Before he could help himself, Peter inserted himself into the conversation. “What about genetically modifying the plants?” They both looked up at Peter suddenly, almost like they forgot he was there. Probably because he was supposed to be minding his own business and not listening in to Harley’s project.

 

“What do you mean?” Peter was surprised to hear Harley sound genuinely intrigued. He was expecting a quick dismissal.

 

“UPenn found that this one gene, GRP8 I think, is sometimes overexpressed in plants that are in areas with low phosphorus levels so that the plant increases the production of root hairs so they can absorb more phosphorus from the soil. Maybe you can find a similar gene and shut if off so the plants are producing less roots and absorbing less nutrients.”

 

Dr. Miller was smiling at Peter, but Harley seemed to be lost in thought. “I mean it wouldn’t stop the source but if it worked it may slow down plant growth and reverse the effects of O2 depletion. I mean this could actually work.” Harley sounded excited.

 

“Great! Well it sounds like Harley you just found yourself a collaborator! Peter I would love for you to come work with us this summer. You can help Harley and maybe pitch your own project idea if you have something in mind.”

 

Peter couldn’t believe it. She hadn’t asked him a single question. “I mean- are you sure?” Peter wanted to take it back as soon as he said it. He should accept it and run before she changed her mind. But he couldn’t help himself, it seemed so surreal. “I mean don’t you have questions for me or want a recommendation or something?”

 

Oh God, just shut up.

 

Luckily Dr. Miller just laughed. “No. I mean I could ask you some questions if you want, but you just came up with a great idea and I think that its only fair if you get a chance to work on it. I would still like to show you around though so you can see what equipment you’d be working with when you start. I mean if you accept, of course.”

 

Was she kidding?

 

Before he could help himself, he blurted, “I accept!” He swallowed and tried to sound less desperate. “I mean of course I accept; I would love to work here.”

 

For the next half hour, she showed him the lab explaining what each piece of equipment did if he didn’t know already. She briefly talked about some of the projects that the college interns had pitched to her and explained that while not all would get funded, they would at least go through the planning phase for all of them. She assured Peter that while SI funded the projects the intellectual property still belonged to the individual who came up with it and worked on it. The only caveat was that if the student decided to sell the data or the final product to another company the student would have to pay back the money given by SI for the research cost.

 

Peter hadn’t realized that Harley had slipped out until he went to say goodbye to him. With a promise that SI would be in touch soon, Dr. Miller lead Peter back to the lobby. He skipped the subway and walked all the way back to his apartment with project ideas going through his head. He was going to work for SI this summer. He was going to work with some of the smartest college interns on their personal projects. For the first time since May died Peter felt light.

 

He couldn’t wait to tell Ned.

 

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