help
- - -
The air felt heavy, it actually felt as though it weighed you down when you set foot into the room. Just a look around the maids and guards could tell you as much. And if those who merely worked for the Goddess felt that way, what would her youngest daughter be feeling? What would the young woman think? At seeing her mother, a cough away from becoming a star, what did Coralina Freyasdottir feel?
Absolutely nothing
The queen was ill, and there were many conspiracies around it; her majesty shouldn't even be able to get this sick. Some thought it was her loneliness that brought her to this helpless state, some others went to the extreme length of speculating over the thought of the grey eyed princess poisoning her.
Those theories, however close or far from the truth, didn't matter though, did they? Because her mother, her blood, the last bit of family she had, was in a deep slumber, waking up every few hours for a couple of minutes, then slipping away once again, back to the land of the too weak to live, yet too stubborn to die
This girl wasn't the Cora Francis we know yet, she wasn't the fierce woman who wouldn't back out of a challenge no matter how many stab wounds decorated her back or how much weight fell on her shoulders.
This was Coralina Freyasdottir. The kid who was casted away by her mother at the age of ten, who was stripped from her land, who was sent to an unknown golden realm, all of it disguised as educational purposes. That had been more than 600 years ago.
So, what was she supposed to be feeling? What was the appropriate mixture of feelings she should be experiencing? Those where the thoughts swirling around her mind as she stepped into the room and saw her
The woman sleeping in front of her was less than a stranger: she was the mother who decided that she deserved to learn and master her powers, but still didn't find much importance in having to waste her own time guiding the girl, when she could send her somewhere else
She was the woman that decided that Cora just wasn't worth the trouble
Half of her resented the woman for the love Cora felt she deserved but never got, the other part mourned for the relationship she knew they would never have now. The goddess of beauty was as good as gone, and her youngest daughter could only stand and watch
"Weren't you taught that it's rude to stare?" resounded the hoarse voice of someone who so many nights ago had put her to sleep with soft and full of life lullabies
"Well, if i did, you wouldn't really know, would you, mother?" came the unwavering response
"I'm sorry, Coco" said the woman through a remorseful smile, using the nickname the girl hadn't heard since the day she traveled through bifrost for the first time and said 'i love you' to her mother for the last
How many nights had she dreamt of those words coming out of her mouth? Many, but they were never in their current setting, normally they'd take place in a beautiful garden, both of them running to hug each other, then the woman would utter those words, I'm sorry, Coco, as Cora nuzzled her little head against her neck and her blonde hair, and it would feel like peace.
"You may be on your deathbed, but you don't get to apologize" snapped the princess calmly, those dreams had vanished around a century ago, she no longer wished for her mommy, still, she sent a wisp of her lilac magic towards her mother, just to move a strand of hair that was getting on her face
"Not even a crocodile tear?" questioned the older woman, teasingly but with a hint of pain that made the girl's compassionate heart swell
"Do you believe you deserve my tears? Do you even actually care?" retorted Cora, raising her eyebrows in an angry, taunting manner, still, Freya could see her hands clenching and unclenching, as if that empty display of rage would stop the ugly sadness that threatened to make itself known
"Oh, I don't" she chuckled without missing a beat, "doesn't mean it wouldn't hurt to see my daughter a bit more touched when she sees.... well, this" she says, gesturing with her weak arm around the room, then herself. Her eye bags, her boney figure and shineless hair, "And, I do care", that was only met by a grunt in disbelief
"You get what you give" was the strained response, barely keeping herself together from running to her, subconsciously straightening her back anytime the thought flew through her head
"Have you fallen in love, my sweet girl?" the woman asked, after all, she was goddess of many things, love being one of those
"How would I know?" she scoffed
"What's her name?" wondered the goddess, staring at the ceiling with a calm air surrounding her
"H-How would you possibly-" she exclaimed perplexed, "and don't give me that 'mother knows best' nonsense" she added with a huff when the older woman opened her mouth
"Frigga sends letters periodically, keeps me updated on my daughter" shrugged the older woman
"Frigga and I are in the same palace, you could've just contacted me" she said with a dry laugh, not amused
"Easier said than done" came the emotional response
"You found sending me away pretty damn easy, Freya" she hissed
It's fair to say, whoever saw this whole scene play out, would probably grimace at the younger girl's hostility towards the fragile and gentle woman in the gigantic hospital-like bed
"What's your favorite flower? I asked Frigga in my last letter, but she didn't answer the flower question" mused Freya, ignoring her comment , "I like orchids" she added with a light smile
"Blue orchids" she said in a 'ha' kind of huff, finding it awfully poetic that the mother-daughter pair only had blood and flowers in common at this point, it was laughable
"I'm sorry" Freya repeated, surely picking on the bittersweetness of the coincidence
"Yeah, me too" she sighed, munching the inside of her cheeks as if that would stop her from crying, hugging or maybe punching the one who abandoned her, she wasn't sure
"Could you fetch something for me? On the top drawer over there" she requested, pointing towards a small wardrobe by the door, succeeding at taking Cora out of her own mind, which she silently thanked her for
The young woman hesitantly walked towards it, her back facing her mother and her eyes roaming through the piece of oak furniture
"What is it?" she asked when she opened it, inspecting anything and everything without much care
"The blue little bag, it was your father's" she answered, smiling slightly at the reminiscence of the sorcerer who had stolen her heart then left her in the altar
She grabbed it, walked over her mother to deposit the item next to her, immediately going back to standing by the end of the bed, fearing what she would do if she stayed close to her mother for longer than two heartbeats
"It's for you, silly" chuckled the woman, the sound so alike Cora's own laugh, it physically pained the princess, which confused the queen, who had clearly not heard that sound come out of her since the girl was ten
The goddess used what little was left of her magic to get it to Cora without moving, and as the girl inspected the bag, the blonde woman spoke again
"You shouldn't depend on your magic, Cora, trust me, it will come to bite you when you least expect it, try to enjoy the most 'mundane' things, set the table by yourself from time to time, walk to places, don't just teleport, learn how to fight with swords, it's a good tool. All of it is worth it" she told her
That was why she couldn't forgive Freya and just walk up to her and hold her hand as she faded away. Because she shouldn't be teaching her this stuff now, she should've taught her everything she had to teach when she had been growing up.
Freya should've bestowed that great piece of advice upon her as they were walking together, smiling and happy, through a field of blue orchids, searching for the perfect spot for a picnic.
Not there, lying on her deathbed, willing the sky to take her. And not then, as she closed her eyes again, going back to her slumber.
"You're such a complicated woman, Freya" she whispered to no one
When she finally got around to opening the tiny blue bag, she found a ring, not an engagement nor wedding ring, it was just a ring, beautifully simple, a silver band with an emerald stripe in the inside of it and a suspiciously grey gem, which looked like it was waiting for something to fill it with a colour it had once had and now had lost
Then, there was the little note, that stupid piece of paper that would haunt her for centuries and centuries to come
"Keep it safe and wear it when the time is right,
Don't worry, you'll know when that is,
It'll call you"
And she did keep it, but it never called her.
So the ring went wherever she went, but never on a finger, for everyone to see and admire. No, it was hidden, like a secret and a shame.
In her satchel when she left Asgard for good, clutched in her hands when she was named Queen of Valhalla, inside her pocket when she got to Midgard. Everywhere she went
Why wasn't the time right? Was she just never worth it? Was that ring nothing more but the final proof of how, no matter the time, the efforts she makes, the time would never be right for her?
- - -
When Thor got the text, he panicked.
That was plainly obvious when he stormed into his brother's quarters, as in, the door flew out of its hinges, and electricity trickled around him and his high held hammer, eyes wide as saucers, frantically looking around
"What is the matter with you, you buffoon?" Loki practically hissed, he looked like a frightened cat
Thor looked confused, taking in his surroundings and realizing there was nothing out of place, no blood, no dead brother, all perfectly alright, and now he was just standing in the middle of his brother's room, full battle gear on, what?, Loki just stared at him and sat back on his desk, computer on and his fingers flying through the keyboard as he resumed his search
"But, you said-" the man stopped himself, grabbing his phone and checking to make sure he hadn't just imagined it, but no, there it was, "You just sent me a message that read 'Help', thought I'd find you at the very least bleeding out", Thor said it laughing, but it was a relieved laughter, like he'd honestly expected just that
"Would not be the first time, understood" Loki muttered in agreeance, then he stood up and looked at his brother, he had asked for his help, but he forgot that to get his help, he'd first have to tell him what he needed help with, so it suddenly became much more difficult to say
After seeing his younger brother open and close his mouth like a fish around five times, he decided to go to Loki's computer and see what he'd been looking at. There in bright display, the search bar read: 'First dates on Midgard', and just before Loki could stop him and reprimand him for his nosiness, he found himself trapped in his brother's arms as he very unceremoniously picked him up the floor and hugged him
"Oh, brother, I'm so happy for you right now!" he boomed out, his grip faltering when a dagger found its home in his shoulder, finally letting go of Loki
"As much as it ills me to ask you, you have more experience, and for some reason you managed to have a somewhat stable relationship with Dr. Foster", he begrudgingly stated, though before Thor could boast about his skills he added slyly, "Although, you did also manage to screw that up pretty quickly, so maybe I should stick to the Internet"
"I will ignore that" the God of thunder said in return, his smile not even wavering at his brother's poor attempt at getting rid of the embarrassment it brought him to come to him for help
The following hour was spent trying to cover everything he'd have to cover on his first date with Coralina, rehearsing what he'd say when he saw her, choosing appropriate attire, of course only after they'd done their research on the restaurant the woman had mentioned
Thor found himself forcing his face not to smile so widely when he asked whether his date was with a certain grey-eyed sorceress, but he certainly couldn't contain the strength in which he patted Loki on his back when he confirmed that, Yes, you oaf, who else could it possibly be with?
They had to endure many articles written by self-proclaimed 'alpha males', as if that title wasn't already ridiculous, the things they assured women liked were to say the least appalling, they did take a moment to thank their upbringing after reading the '10 things chicks like but are too afraid to accept'. They decided to stick with articles solely written by women after that, and by the time eight o'clock was nearing, Thor gave his brother one last proud embrace and let him to get ready once and for all.
- - -
"There's just a lot he doesn't know about me" the woman shrugged
The floor of Cora's room could have sent any neat freak into cardiac arrest, but date preparations were needed, and apparently that was reason enough for Natasha and Cora to throw almost every piece of clothing the latter owned out of the closet, helps visualizing, the russian spy had said.
"That's the only reason you haven't asked him out before?" Natasha asked her with a huff of a laugh, "secrets are not worth a life of unhappiness" the redhead mused out loud
"Who says I need a relationship to be happy?" she argued, absentmindedly fist bumping Natasha, "I'm just weary of getting into something like this with so many skeletons on my closet, and, trust me, I'm not ready to let them out, they're all... dusty" she explained, grimacing at her own analogy, imagining a closet full of as many skeletons as her secrets, painted in dust from all the years she'd kept them there
"If you're not ready, then why are you getting ready for a date with him? It's rude to lead people on" lightly chastised Natasha with raised eyebrows, "even Gods"
"I'm not leading him on, but i don't wanna lay myself on the table if I'm still not a hundred percent sure" she huffed, "It's like a test drive: if tonight goes well, it might force me to, you know, take out a rag and start dusting" the woman added, partially trying to see if her thinking process made sense to an outsider
"Mhm... look, this conversation deviated because you misunderstood my first implication" Natasha admitted with her arms up in mock defeat, "All i was saying is, you should be prepared" said Natasha as she shamelessly rummaged through Cora's clothes
"I'm not putting on lingerie for the first date" replied the woman, for the tenth time, snatching the green lacey set the spy held in her hands
"You can never be too sure, I'm telling you, Cora..."
Natasha then went on giving her, what she was sure were, very logical reasons to why she in fact should wear lingerie in their first date. But Cora felt the words fade out as her vision suddenly became black and white
She panicked, looking frantically around, she felt like she was walking in a dream, not a good nor a bad one, but one of those dreams where you know you're dreaming and you have absolutely no idea what's happening, but you can't wake up, so you just follow along in hopes that that will clear the doubts
She tried to look at the green set of underwear Natasha had been holding seconds before, and that too, was in a dark grey shade... anywhere she looked, different shades of grey
Until her eyes stumbled upon her red coin purse, where a suspiciously faint glow shone, colorfully oblivious to Cora's monochrome current point of view
She walked towards it without thinking, she was in autopilot mode, she was not in control, she figured, this was purely her magic's intuitive acting, right then and there, she was not a host to her powers, she was a shell, a powerless and wordless shell.
When she reached the pouch she felt her eyes widen as she remembered what she kept safe there
She, involuntarily, moved to open it, and surely there it was, the still immaculate blue little bag
"Twisted joke, please just be one of my mind's twisted jokes" she exhaled, muttering to herself, not being able to stop her hands from untying the tiny and oh-so intimidating object
Trying to stop it was obviously to no avail, since the next thing she knew, the glowing ring was on her left pinky finger and the colour had been brought back to her world. Somehow even brighter than ever before
"Hey, you okay?" questioned the redhead, cutting off her still ongoing rambling when she caught sight of her friend staring confusedly at her hand. Thankfully, this managed to break her out of her daydreaming as well
"Just thinking of what a pain in my ass my mom turned out to be" she sighed with a dopey smile, which earned her a confused frown from her favourite agent
"You never talk about your mother" pointed the woman, sitting on the bed, and going full interrogation mode, watching Cora pacing calmly
"Not much to talk about" shrugged the incognito queen
"Oh yeah, I'm sure there isn't" chuckled Natasha, not prying, but making it obvious that she didn't necessarily believe her words, Cora would've thanked her if her head hadn't been so far from the ground as she felt the weight of the ring on her finger
"What time did you say he was picking you up?" she spoke again soon after, luckily bringing Cora back to the present
"I'm picking him up in..." she trailed off, picking her phone to check the time before her eyes widened "Now, actually"
"You look amazing, кролик" praised the redhead softly, pushing her out of her room to find her prince
She had her hair down, braided crown adorning her otherwise boring look. Her make-up, which she'd had to ask Natasha to put on for her, had a beautiful palette of earth tones with a slight hint of green, which was accentuated by the emerald earrings she had conjured for the occasion and the ring, which gem had turned to the most beautiful shade of forest green
She decided to, for one night, stay away from her usual midgardian choice of attire, that being black jeans, band t-shirts that Tony recommended, and leather jackets. Instead she opted for a flowy long burgundy dress. With pleated shoulders and a slit on her left side that reached her thigh, high enough to notice the golden strap that forever held her favourite dagger. Her shoes were simple black stilettos that she swore she could run in, when in reality she knew she had skipped the high heels 101 class.
But she felt and looked straight up out of a dream, and that statement would be easily backed up by the look of utter awe the god of mischief seemed to be in when he opened the door after three loud knocks, if he hadn't been so enthralled by the beautiful piece of art before him, he would've probably remembered the words he was supposed to say, but really, his eyes said it all instead
"Evening, my prince" she said with a teasing bow and a soft smile
"Evening, dove" he said grabbing her hand and planting a kiss on it, much like the first time they'd met, only this time she wasn't just a pretty stranger, and he wasn't a handsome villain, now they were Cora and Loki, and who knows what that could possibly entail
- - -