My World Is You

Peter ran until he couldn’t run anymore. 

He knew he should be taking it easy after just getting the all clear and getting his casts off but he couldn’t stay in his home after what he had just been told. 

Part of him felt like it was a cruel joke played by his parents but they would never do that to him. 

So it had to be true. 

Unless he was dreaming. 

He pinched himself and looked around. Still here. Not dreaming. 

He cried harder. 

Peter ran towards the park near his house and sat down on a bench, crying into his hands. 

What did this mean now? It felt like his whole world was ripped apart and it was. The person he called dad for twelve years wasn’t actually his dad and he couldn’t help but feel extremely betrayed but also extremely curious because he had about a million questions that he wanted answered. 

Peter heard a stick snap and he snapped his head, seeing his dad walking towards him with his hands in his pockets. Peter looked away and wiped the tears from his eyes but they kept falling. 

Tony sat down next to him, staying silent for a few minutes before breaking the silence. 

“I want you to know that I still love you. And that no matter what happens, I’ll always love you. You’re my son no matter what. Okay?” Tony felt like he needed to say that. He felt like he needed to say it a million times and it still wouldn’t be enough. 

Peter didn’t respond to that. 

Instead, he looked up at Tony with tears in his eyes. “If you aren’t my dad, then who is?” 

Tony wasn’t prepared for this. He looked down. “I don’t know, Peter.” 

Peter nodded. “Why didn’t he raise me then? Why did you raise me? Does-does my real dad even know me? Do I know him?” Peter looked up at Tony, eyes wide with betrayal and heartbreak. 

Tony let out a loud sigh. “Peter, I love you. You aren’t mine biologically, but that doesn’t stop me from loving you and caring about you.” He paused. He honestly knew nothing about Peter’s biological father. He was still coming to terms himself that he wasn’t Peter’s dad… 

Peter needed to hear that but it only made him feel a little bit better. “How-how long did you know? Forever?” 

“I found out a few days after you got hurt. Your mom found out about a year ago.” 

Peter looked down at the goosebumps covering his legs. “Oh. But… then how did mom get pregnant with me? If you aren’t my dad.” 

Tony spoke to Peter about the birds and the bees when he turned twelve but Peter seemed uninterested and disgusted so Tony only talked to him about consent and that only adults can do these things, that kids shouldn’t be doing it. So he definitely wasn’t going to explain to his son now how his mother cheated on his father and had sex with another man, resulting in Peter. 

“Well, your mom once liked another man. Someone you haven’t met before.” 

Peter nodded and Tony saw that he was trying to take it all in. “Is he… nice?” 

“I don’t know. I don’t know who he is, buddy.” 

Peter nodded again then looked up at Tony, touching his face. “But… everyone says we look alike. I don’t get it.” 

Tony blinked back tears. “I know, baby. We do look alike. I guess we just got lucky.” Now Tony couldn’t say Peter got his good looks from him or his brains, nothing physical on Peter was from him and that hurt. 

But his amazing little personality was. At least Tony could say that. 

Peter looked down at his lap and let out a breath. “Does… does this mean you won’t love me anymore? Or-or care for me?” 

Tony couldn’t have Peter thinking about that. He reached over and lifted him onto his lap, half expecting Peter to push him away but instead, Peter laid his head on Tony’s chest and let out a sigh. “I promise you that it doesn’t change anything at all. I love you with everything I have and I always will. No matter what, you’re my baby boy. Okay?” Peter nodded against him. “And I changed your stinky diapers so if that doesn’t make me your dad, I don’t know what will.” 

Peter let out a tiny laugh. “Hey. I was a baby. Not my fault.” 

“You wouldn’t potty train until three and a half. Definitely a lot of years of stinky diapers.” He poked Peter’s side and Peter turned to wrap his arms around his neck. “I love you, Peter. More than you know.” 

Peter began crying. “I don’t like this. It scares me.” 

“It scares me too.” Tony hugged Peter tighter, being completely honest with him. “But I’ll always love you more than anything. I promise you that. Our blood doesn’t separate us.” 

Peter hated everything about this. 

He just wanted everything to go back to how it used to be. 

Peter was scared of his future now. Not because of his injuries and what happened to him but because of what he just found out. His whole life was a lie and Peter didn’t know what to do with this information or how to come to terms with the fact that the man he loved, the man who raised him, wasn't actually his real father. 

Peter felt like his whole life was crumbling down around him. 

Tony nudged him gently. 

“Want to head back home? It’s getting dark.” Tony suggested. He wanted Peter to get settled at home before he left. Peter knew the truth. He could walk on his own. Tony just needed some time to himself to get his thoughts together and decide where he and May go from here. 

Tony honestly couldn’t look at her without feeling so much anger towards her. 

He couldn’t look at her and feel like things could go back to how they used to be. 

If he found out that May cheated on him twelve years ago and that was the end of that then Tony could see himself getting over it. But not this. May lied. May had a son with another man who Tony still didn’t know of. 

He still loved Peter but he just… he needed some time to himself. 

Peter shrugged. “I don’t care.” 

“Let’s go back.” Tony stood up, waiting for Peter to do the same thing but instead of Peter grabbing his hand like he usually did, Peter just walked next to him, not grabbing his hand. That hurt Tony’s heart. 

Tony opened the front door and watched Peter run inside, disappearing up the stairs and the door to his bedroom slammed shut. Tony sighed. 

He was going to go after him but he decided to give Peter some space. Tony had no idea what Peter was going through. Of course he was part of the reason Peter was going through it and Tony was experiencing it with him but Tony was a full grown adult. Peter was a young child and Tony knew this was going to have long term effects on him with relationships when he’s older. 

So Tony wanted to go about this the best way possible. 

He walked into the kitchen to make himself a coffee and saw May sitting on the couch, looking up stuff on her computer but she put the computer away when she saw Tony walk in. 

He sat down on the opposite couch, putting his coffee mug on the table and his head in his hands. Tony breathed. “What do we do? Where do we go from here?” 

May had no idea either. “I regret what I did. I do. I’m sorry but I can’t change it.” 

“I wish you had told me you cheated on me when you did.” 

“But Peter wasn’t born yet. Would you really have forgiven me and stayed with me?” May got to her knees and held Tony’s hands in hers. “I am so sorry, Tony.” She said, remorse thick in her voice but Tony didn’t care. What’s done was done. 

“I know you are. That doesn’t change anything.” Tony pulled his hands away from hers. “Peter is in the middle of this. And I don’t want him to hear us fighting.” He sighed, running his hands through his hair because he knew what he had to do. “And I know if I stay here, we’ll fight. So I think, for tonight I’m gonna go to the tower.” 

May sat back on the couch, not daring to look him in the eyes. “If that’s what you want…” 

“You think I want any of this? You have no idea how hard this is for me. You made the decision to cheat on me twelve years ago and keep that a secret. At the end of the day you’re still Peter’s mother. That doesn’t change for you.” 

“You’re still his dad, Tony. You raised him.” 

Tony narrowed daggers at her. “Who is he?” 

“What?” 

“Don’t play dumb. Who’s his real dad? I want to know. I deserve to know.” 

May looked at him with tears in her eyes. She sighed, shaking her head. “His name is Ben Parker.” 

Now Tony wanted to know everything. “How did you meet him?” 

“We met through a mutual friend.” 

“What mutual friend?” 

“Tony-” 

“What mutual friend?” He repeated. 

“Mary.” 

Tony knew her. And now he hated her. “So when did you make the decision to sleep with him? Was it a random night? Multiple times? What?” 

“Tony.” May grabbed a Kleenex to wipe her eyes. “I… it was one time. I regretted it and I refused to acknowledge it because I felt so guilty. And when I found out I was pregnant, I had no doubt in my mind that you weren’t the father.” 

“Yeah because you were letting two guys fuck you at the same time.” 

“Please don’t say it like that.” 

“Like what? The truth?” 

“I just wanted-” 

“Dad?” 

Tony snapped his head towards the stairs and saw Peter standing there, his eyes red from crying. He stood up and forced a smile on his face. “Yeah, baby?” 

Peter looked between him and his mom. “Are you sleeping with me tonight?” 

Tony’s heart broke. He had to be honest and tell him that he had to leave for the night. He held his arms out for him, easily lifting him up and setting Peter on his hip, walking upstairs. Tony tried to savor this moment with Peter willingly going into his arms because he knew eventually, Peter would refuse to. 

Tony was absolutely terrified that once Peter meets his real father, that he would choose him over Tony. 

“Let’s go talk in your room.” He kissed his temple and felt Peter tense up at those words. 

“Are you and mom getting a divorce?” 

Tony shut his bedroom door and placed Peter on the bed. 

“You are, aren’t you?” 

“Peter-” 

“No. Tell me.” 

Tony sighed. “We aren’t getting a divorce.” At least not yet… “But your mom and I do need a break from each other so I’m going to go spend the night at the tower. And I’ll come back here tomorrow morning to see you.” 

Peter was sitting up on his knees. “Dad. No. Please. Please stay here. I-I don’t want you to go. Please.” Peter grabbed onto his hands desperately, just like how May had done to him downstairs only Tony didn’t pull away from him. “Just makeup with mom and we can just pretend like none of this happened. Dad. Please. I don’t want you to go.” 

Tony was so tempted to stay but he knew he had to go. 

He needed some time alone to clear his head and decide what he wanted to do next. He kissed Peter’s head. “I love you so much. Always remember that but I’m going to leave for the night.” 

Peter started crying now. “If you really loved me, you would stay!” 

Tony’s heart was breaking. “I do love you.” He caressed Peter’s hair but Peter moved away from him and laid down in his bed, shoving his face into the pillow and sobbing. “I love you so much. I’ll see you tomorrow. I promise.” 

Tony got up and left before he could start crying too. 

He hated this so much. 

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.

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After Tony left, Peter cried on his bed, continuing to glance towards the door, hoping his dad had changed his mind about leaving and decided to come back for him. 

But no luck. 

When it hit midnight, Peter decided that Tony wasn’t coming back for him so he continued to cry, hugging his arms around himself to find any source of self comfort he could get. 

Peter just wanted things to go back to normal. He wanted that so desperately. He could sense that his life was changing and he was so scared and needed his dad by his side. 

He was scared of what the future held now. 

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Tony sat at his work bench in his lab at the tower, not really working on anything in particular. His mind was racing elsewhere. 

He was pulling some wires apart, tossing them into a bin and staring at the picture of him and Peter on his desk. In the picture, Peter was two years old and Tony was holding him in his arms, both of them grinning into the camera. It felt like just yesterday that picture was taken and then he blinked and Peter is suddenly twelve and not his son. 

It was all way too much. Tony just wanted… needed to do whatever he could to keep Peter in his life but he was terrified that Peter didn’t want him in his life now, after knowing the truth. 

There was a knock on the glass door so Tony turned towards it, seeing Pepper standing there. He sighed. He really didn’t want to see her right now but he trusted her and he really needed someone to talk to that wasn’t May or Peter. 

“Open the door, FRIDAY.” 

The door opened and Pepper walked in, her high heels clicking against the cement ground. She walked up to Tony and put a stack of files on his desk. “FRIDAY said you were here so I decided to bring these to you.” She looked at him, questionably. “Why are you here and not at home?” 

Tony shook his head, looking away from the picture on his desk. “I just needed some time alone to think about some stuff.” 

“Are you and May okay?” 

Tony wasn’t attractive to Pepper. Sure, she was beautiful and she’s always been there. She was more than just his personal assistant. She babysat Peter at times when they desperately needed a baby sister at the last minute and she was a really good listener. Not to mention the CEO of his company and one hell of a business woman for that matter. 

Tony shrugged. “She cheated on me.” 

“Oh Tony.” She sat down on the stool next to him, rubbing a hand on his back even though she knew he didn’t like physical affection from people other than Peter and May. “What happened?” 

He didn’t want to admit it because admitting it would make it true and he didn’t want this to be true. He wanted things to go back to the way they used to be. 

But it was true. 

This was his reality now. 

He took a breath. 

“Peter isn’t my son.” He told her. 

“What? What do you mean?” 

Taking a deep breath, Tony explained it to her. “May cheated on me before Peter was born. She slept with some guy, got pregnant with Peter and she was sleeping with me too so I didn’t expect this baby to be anyone’s but mine. He looks so much like me. I… I’m still haven’t a hard time processing this.” 

So was Pepper. 

“When did you find out?” She asked him. 

“At the hospital. About a week after Peter’s accident. Our blood results didn’t match. When I told May, she told me that she’s known for the last year. She tested my son and…. And she didn’t even tell me. She probably never would have. I mean… that probably would have been better because then I could still be in his life and be his dad.” 

“Tony. You raised him. Biological blood means nothing. He’s still your son in every other way.” 

He was trying to tell himself that but it was harder than he thought it would be. 

“That is if he still wants me in his life.” Tony was terrified of that outcome. 

“What? Why wouldn’t he want that? You’re his dad, Tony.” She said. 

“But I’m not. I’m not his dad. This whole time… I’m just… some man in his life.” 

Silence spread over them for a few moments before Pepper broke it. 

“Do you still love him?” Asked Pepper, turning her body to fully face Tony. 

Now it was Tony’s turn to look at her. He didn’t even have to think about that, Peter was his everything and nothing would ever change that but Tony couldn’t help but he was afraid that Peter wouldn’t want him in his life anymore. “Of course I love him. I love him more than anything.” 

“Tony. I knew you way before you had Peter and I knew the man you were, he’s changed you for the better and I know this is extremely difficult but it doesn’t change the fact that you still love him like he is your own son and that’s all that matters.” 

“Of course I still love him. I’m just scared that he doesn’t love me anymore.” 

She shook her head at him. “You have a little boy. So you should know that they are complicated little beings but they’re also pretty simple in the sense that they just need someone to love them and he has you to love him. You can make the choice now to continue loving him and go back home.” 

“No. I can’t. I… I need to be alone and… decide what to do.” He looked at the baby picture of Peter again. “I love Peter. But… I’m not sure if I want to be with May anymore. Not… not after this.” 

“I can understand that. It’s important to have time to think about that. Just don’t let that decision affect your relationship with your son.” 

Tony appreciated her. He gave her a weak smile. “Thanks. You didn’t need to do this but I appreciate it.”

She stood up, squeezing his hand in hers then she left. “I’ll leave you alone now. Just remember what I said.” 

Part of Tony wanted her to stay. 

But he also needed time alone to think.