Miguel was content with things, work had been a little less stressful, the missions he did have to go on were less stressful now that everything else had been dealt with. Most issues caused by Miles were smoother over to an extent, it was a work in progress, but it wasn’t what kept him content.
One thing- one person actually did, and it was Pavitr Prabhakar, he wasn’t really sure how he became the person to make him feel so much yet so content. It hadn’t originally been mutual, the boy looked up to him as his superior and did his best to make him proud, but somewhere along the way he gained more than just the older man’s praise. Miguel over time was almost doting on him, gifts, giving him much more attention, every little thing he refused to do with any other he did with Pavitr.
It obviously made the teen feel special, like he was an exception, and he really was. Before him the only person he felt so strongly for had been Gabriella, he didn’t even love her mother the way he had with her, from the moment she was born she bewitched him, Miguel had been hers entirely until she died, and even when he replaced himself he became that Gabriella’s as well.
But after losing her too he had shut himself off, Lyla couldn’t even get to him, he was sure no one would ever again. But Pavitr was the exception, even down to his age- the times miguel did ever indulge in porn or sex it was criminal, disgusting, all of the people in the videos he watched were small children.
Or kids he managed to quickly grab and use, it was a sick twisted desire but it was something he had never been capable of controlling, yet the teen despite his age enticed Miguel in a way no ‘older’ person had. It was something that genuinely surprised him once he realized he took a liking to Pavitr, he quickly noticed the other felt the same way too.
He took the initiative of course, it barely took any effort to get the kid wrapped around his finger, pushing others off to make time for him, making time in his schedule just for him. But he never seemed to realize how much he was getting wrapped further and further around the boy’s finger, he’d cancel meetings, postpone training sessions, almost anything he’d ask for he’d drop everything to do.
Despite it all he didn’t consider what he and pavitr had as a real love, puppy love at best, but he’d be lying if he said he genuinely loved the kid, that’s what he told himself at least. But despite how he felt the two fell into a routine of sorts, they made time for each other, especially on the days Miguel would spend late evenings at Spider HQ, he had his own personal quarters the two could retreat to and enjoy together without either having to lie, if anyone asked they could tell the truth without it being suspicious.
Pavitr unsurprisingly did his best to keep it all a secret, he put everything into covering up their ‘relationship’, people wouldn’t understand- they wouldn’t get that he loved Miguel and that Miguel loved him. But the older knew any sane person would know Pavitr was just a kid, a victim if anything. Tonight is like any other besides the teen asking him if he could buy alcohol, it’s something he wants to try and he knows he won’t be told no, that’s good enough reasoning for him to agree.
He buys fireball and Modelos, he doesn’t forget the ice and a few glasses, since it’s one of the only times they get together he wears something else besides just his suit. dark grey sweatpants and a short sleeved black shirt, it’s not form fitting but it’s not baggy either, perfect for the comfortable night they planned.
He can’t help but think about their relationship again while he waits, he thinks about how Pavitr was head over heels for him, he was more than willing to lose his virginity to Miguel, he was always trying to learn how to make him feel as good as possible, he realizes the teen would probably do just about anything for him.
He pops the cap of the beer off with his talon, huffing a little before taking a swig, he can’t get the thought out of his head. That kid might just really do anything for him, he mentally repeats that again and again as he drinks his beer, sitting in silence in the dim light. When Pavitr does finally arrive he only then notices he’s already finished off three beers, he hums as the other enters his room contently.
The boy is quick to undo his suit and pull his mask off revealing comfortable clothing he wore under it so he wouldn’t raise any suspicion being at Spider HQ without his suit, without much thought he sets his suit and mask down onto the ground beside the door before making his way over to the other.
Pavitr’s smile widens as he sits on his lap, chuckling softly as Miguel’s clawed hand gently smoothes up his back, the teen can feel the sharp edges of his talons, but he knows he won’t be cut or clawed at. “You got started without me,” He whispers into his ear, peppering a few kisses along his jaw as he gets comfortable. He picks up one of the beers, gently taking ahold of Miguel’s hand and using one of the talons to pop the cap off.
“Is beer good?” He asks, looking over the open bottle. “Depends.” Is all the older hums, his hand returns to the small of his back, talons retracting as he starts to rub his back. Reluctantly he takes a sip of the beer and for a few moments sits still, trying to figure out if he liked it or not. He takes another sip as he leans into the man’s arms, he guesses he doesn’t mind the taste, it’s something he can get used to.
“Did you get anything else?” “Fireball and ice.” “No chaser?” “Don’t need one.” It’s enough for the boy to not question him any further, the two sit comfortably as they sip their beers, enjoying the silence since both of them were always so busy with so much noise and energy. The only sound that really fills the room is Miguel cracking open the bottle of fireball, making a drink for himself with the other still in his lap, and as soon as he’s done he leans back in his chair getting comfortable.
Despite his naturally sullen expression he’s quite content, even with the complicated feelings he had for the younger he still enjoyed when they had moments like this. Though he always has thought about Gabriella when he drinks, he can’t help it, it’s so easy to picture her in his head when he’s drunk, hell if he tried hard enough he was sure the teen in his lap could pass for her well enough too.
The realization makes a lightbulb light up in his head, “Hey pavi baby.” He hums, his breath smells a little like cinnamon, Pavitr likes it. “Hm?” He hums looking up at him from his beer, it’s only halfway empty, Miguel assumed he wasn’t a big fan of it. “Y’know how you wore that stuff for me before..” Lingerie, the younger was beyond uncomfortable wearing it, but after some convincing he didn’t seem to mind so much, he noticed girly things just didn’t interest Pavitr, he guessed he could understand why.
He already looks a little uneasy but it’s obvious he’s trying to see the brighter side of what he’s about to ask, “y- yeah..” “I was wondering, since i got you something. You could do something for me too?” He says, he finishes off the rest of his glass, hands resting on the teen’s hips and holding him close. He gently peppers kisses kisses along his jaw and down his neck, trying to soothe his nerves, “Well.. i- i dunno,,” “It’s not lingerie I promise.” he presses a firm kiss to the corner of his mouth, “You don’t ever have to wear lingerie again okay?” That seems to help calm him.
“Okay.. what is it?” He turns to better face Miguel, without much else thought he finishes off the rest of his beer, hoping it’ll keep his nerves calm. “Well.. There’s these clothes I have, I think they’d look nice on you...” He trails off, and Pavitr doesn’t make him finish.
“What kind of clothes? I don’t think i can fit into kids clothes Mig.” He mutters, but the other is already standing and gently setting him down before walking over to his closet. For a few moments he silently sorts through it before pulling out a container, it’s full to the brim with neatly folded clothing, he doesn’t realize it’s girls clothing until one of the outfits is set down on the bed.
A blouse and a skirt, the blouse is maroon with cute frilly sleeves and even some lace around the edges, the skirt itself is mid thigh length and black, Pavitr swallows thickly as he stares at them.
They’re Gabriella’s.
His stomach is almost twisting painfully as Miguel kneels down in front of him, hand smoothing over his bare knee as he gently picks up the skirt. “Just for a few minutes.. I wanna see them on someone, on you.” A part of him screams to leave, that this won’t end well and it wouldn’t be good to wear his boyfriend’s dead daughter’s clothes. But another part reminds him how special he is, how Miguel wants to see him in the clothes and how even now he chooses him over anyone else.
After a few moments he ignores the rationality of excusing himself and never speaking to him again, “Okay.. s- sure.” He sighs shakily, he lifts his hips as Miguel’s fingers gently hook on the band of his shorts, pulling them down past his thighs and knees. But then Miguel starts to peel his boxers off too, he stays quiet despite his discomfort, allowing the other to slip them off and help him get into the skirt.
He was more than used to Miguel changing and dressing him like he was a doll, he actually liked the special treatment and attention, but it felt wrong like this, he felt like it was disrespectful to Gabriella.. He’d probably feel less disgusting dancing on her grave and spitting on it, he tries not to think about her anymore as his shirt is peeled off next.
He stays quiet as the older carefully puts the blouse on him, he’s so gentle with the clothes like they’d rip and be ruined if he handled them with any harder care. “There we go..” Miguel whispers, his eyes are half hooded, his face is just slightly flushed. Pavitr stays silent as his hands smooth over his sides and hips, fingers pressing against his ass and taking in how good the skirt looked on him.
But it really didn’t, he didn’t look feminine and girly like any other teen girl would in pretty clothes, or even other teen boys. The blouse isn’t filled out in the right places at all, it’s tight on him and he worries what will happen if he takes too deep of a breath, he’s not sure how he’ll react if it ripped. The skirt isn’t any better either, he looks sorta boxy with all the form fitting clothes on, these are clearly meant for someone with curves- with a chest, but to Miguel he still somehow looks perfect.
“You look pretty baby..” He whispers, with that he finally stands and picks Pavitr up before sitting back in his chair, they sit like before with his hand on the small of his back, except the teen is a thousand times more uncomfortable. He can’t help but wonder if the he had done this before with Gabriella, dressing her up in clothes meant for big girls, drinking with her in his lap, for a few seconds he almost pictures it.
“You want another drink?” Miguel whispers, when he’s given no answer he makes himself another drink and tucks his face into the other’s neck, softly inhaling. The clothes still sorta smell like the laundry detergent Gabriella liked, that and the slight scent of Pavitr, it’s a mix of the soap he uses and coconut oil. It’s something he’s grown to be fond of, it brings him a comfort his daughter’s scent used to give him— but of course it’s different.
He doesn’t love Pavitr the way he does Gabi, he mentally repeats it to himself as he takes a moment to sip at his drink. His other hand slowly slips under the top of the skirt, fingers lightly tracing against his hip, he can’t help but to start kissing and sucking at his neck. His eyes close as he holds him closer, despite his size and stiffness he can almost still feel Gabriella in his lap.
He can almost feel her soft bruised skin, but he can also feel Pavitr, he can’t just ignore that it’s him. It’s almost irritating, he can’t just picture Gabriella in his lap knowing it’s Pavitr, he can’t ignore how good he looks in those clothes. With a huff his lips part, pulling the teen up further into his lap as his fangs drag along his pulse point, but even with the threat of paralysis or worse, the boy stays still and limp in his hold.
“H- How much longer do I keep this on?” He whispers, further tilting his head for Miguel. “Just a bit longer I promise.” between every little kiss and bite he sips at his fireball, he sorta hoped if he was drunk enough he could think about Gabi again without it being ruined.
The thought is enough to make him slam the rest of the drink before making another, Pavitr’s so uncomfortable he can’t focus on anything else besides the clothes he’s wearing, he doesn’t care enough too either, he wants it off as soon as possible. A small lump forms in his throat as the now empty glass is set down, he didn’t realize a minute or two had passed, Miguel feels much warmer and he smells a lot more like cinnamon.
He wonders if the smell of cinnamon brought Gabriella comfort or if she felt the way he did, tears prick at his eyes as he tries to rationalize what’s happening. “So pretty baby..” Miguel chuckles, he has a little grin looking down at him, it almost looks like there’s little hearts in his eyes, he looks utterly in love above him. His hands return to his hips again, thumbs smoothing over his skin, he doesn’t notice the teen’s tears.
“Can.. I please take it off now?” He whimpers as they finally begin to roll down his face, he looks just as pretty as Gabriella, he looks perfect with the same hickeys she had, wearing clothes that were supposed to be hers when she reached fifteen. But it’s different, Pavitr is his own person, he’s his- but still not Gabi.
“Don’t cry baby, it’s okay..” He coos while wiping some of his tears away, staring at him almost lovingly. If they weren’t in such a weird situation he would’ve found the older cute, he would’ve felt special knowing he was one of the only people to be treated like this, but now it just feels wrong and dirty. He’s not sure if he feels that way because he hates girls clothing or if it’s because they’re Gabi’s, he almost feels nauseous at the thought of Miguel doing this to fill some hole within himself, a hole that his daughter’s deaths left.
A part of him wonders if Miguel even loves him, he’s never seen love within him like this until now, it’s upsetting enough to keep him crying. But he still doesn’t stop, “Hey- hey it’s okay.. No llores ángel..” He whispers, his hand trails from his hip to his thigh, slowly starting to inch up his thigh to his cunt.
Surprisingly Pavitr’s wet despite his tears and discomfort, his cute clit is hard too, he knows even if he’s upset his body is still used to him, always getting perfectly wet to take him. “You want em off?” Pavitr nods quickly through his soft sniffles and tears, “Well there is something we could do.. I’ll let you take them off if y-“ “Okay.” Miguel’s eyes widen a little in surprise, he chuckles before nodding and pulling his hand from under the skirt.
“I want the shirt to kept on.” He slurs as he pulls the skirt down, he’s a little too drunk to handle it with as much care as before. “I- I want them both off..” “I got you alcohol remember baby? You owe me,” He knows that’s all Miguel needs to say, he won’t budge and he knows better than to try fight his boyfriend on this. So he gently pushes the band of his sweatpants and boxers down, he even gently gets off his lap and sinks down to the floor in front of him.
Pavitr softly spits into his hand and starts to stroke him, thumb gently rubbing against the slit of his cock as he peppers kisses up the side. He tries to blink away his tears as he does so, it’s already embarrassing enough wearing a blouse that was meant for a dead eight year old. His eyes flutter shut once he reaches the tip, his tongue softly laps at the slit, he’s done it enough times to know what Miguel liked.
He knows from the soft pants and huffs alone he loves it, so he continues stroking him as he starts to take him in his mouth, it took a bit of effort to get used to how big he was, but it was almost a second nature at this point. With ease he takes more than half, allowing his cock to fill his mouth and throat while he strokes what he can’t fit.
Finally his eyes flutter open, Miguel’s staring down at him with half hooded eyes and furrowed brows, “Te ves perfecto niño bonito..” He pants as his head lulls back, he doesn’t touch his hair or head- he can’t control his talons that well, they dig into the armrests of the chair as Pavitr relaxes enough to take him down to the hilt, his nose buries in his pubes for a few seconds.
Miguel almost hisses when he pulls off, drool and precum make his lips look nice and glossy, he’s utterly beautiful like this. “Can.. Can I take the shirt off now?” The teen asks as he crawls into his lap, despite waiting for an answer he still straddles his lap and takes ahold of his cock again. “Not yet- just- just a bit more.” He mutters, before Pavitr can get upset again he firmly holds his hips and pushes them down, making him yelp just a little when he forces the head into him.
He had control over himself with Gabriella, to an extent at least, but the younger enticed him in a way he could never explain. Despite the discomfort he still continues lowering his hips, starting to softly pant as he’s filled up. Sometimes it still surprises him he can even take Miguel without a lot of prep, or now, without any.
There’s still a small sting as his hips finally rest flushed against his lap, they both stay still, getting used to the overwhelming stretch and tightness. Miguel takes in the sight in front of him, he still leaves a bump on Pavitr’s abdomen, it takes everything within him not to press down on it and slam up into the younger.
He stays still as his hips slowly start to move, only then it hits him he’s drunk enough to think about her, he can imagine his dulce niña softly moaning like a whore while rolling her hips perfectly against his own. He can burry his face into the blouse and pretend it’s her in his arms, he can pretend his daughter is back right where she belongs. But something within him doesn’t feel that urge, he doesn’t feel the want to pretend it’s not Pavitr either.
His hold is firm on his hips as he watches him, he’s gotten used to how his boyfriend had a slight staring problem, by now it was just one of the many things Mig did without any explanation. “joder te sientes tan bien-“ He huffs, he takes a moment to sit back a little as he pulls him closer, their chests almost pressed together while he starts to thrust.
Miguel’s thrusts match Pavitr’s movements perfectly, he looks so fucking good on top of him, any way he looks is perfect- everything about him is perfect. “H- hahh!! m- mig—“ He almost squeaks, fresh tears swelling in his eyes as his hips are held in place, this usually always happened, even the times Miguel told him to do all the work he could never control himself.
His thrusts only quicken as the younger rests his head on his shoulder, his eyes are almost fluttered shut as he mewls pathetically, he even scratches at Miguel’s arms, unable to process everything he felt. But it’s mutual, he feels like he’s losing more and more of his senses- all being replaced by the boy on top of him.
He raises his hand just in time as his talons shoot out, all struggling to stay within him, everything inside him pleaded and cried to breed the teen and knock him up, he could do with him what he couldn’t with Gabriella.
He kisses him roughly as his talons lightly drag along his back, barely cutting his soft skin but ripping the blouse. At first Pavitr breaks the kiss with a soft cry, mostly out of worry he ripped it, “Hhh- M’sorr-“ “It’s okay, it’s okay baby.” Miguel pants, quickly reconnecting their lips as he practically rips it off him, he’s too drunk to think about it, he almost felt more drunk off him than the actual alcohol.
Maybe he did love him, not just his perfect body but him, he can’t think of anything else besides him. His tongue swipes over the teen’s teeth, drinking up every little moan and whine, his boy looks better crying from pleasure than from pain, he’s not sure what switch flicked but he doesn’t entirely mind. “H- ghonna cum- Mig—“ “Buen chico, mi buen chico-“ Miguel softly groans, he watches as he edges closer, he always liked watching Pavitr cum.
This time is no different, his thrusts sputter as the younger tightens around him, cumming with a loud cry. Despite his disheveled look he’s still beautiful, he moans loudly as he’s slammed up into, fucked perfectly through his orgasm. Unsurprisingly he squirts in his lap, but he’s too overhelmed to notice or even care. Miguel follows soon after, he thrusts harshly a few more times before finally slamming his hips up into the teen.
He manages to resist the urge to bite him, simply holding him close as he cums in him. Instead he connects their lips again, softly licking around the inside of his mouth while they come down from their highs, even after it they stay like that.
Pavitr’s quiet as he lays on him, his eyes are half hooded and he looks lost in his own little world, “What’s on your mind miel..?” He whispers, his fingers gently trace small shapes on his lower back, despite how warm they both are it’s comfortable, “Nothing.” Pavitr looks almost nervous trying to ignore the way he felt, “You’re sure..?”
“Well.. It’s just,” He pauses for a moment to gather his thoughts, still a little dazed from everything. “You don’t think I’m her.. do you.” He doesn’t look at Miguel when he asks that, looking down at his chest, he’s a little bit more sober than before- he often forgot how the spider dna made his body process things much faster, he still wished he was drunk so he could avoid this, he did love Pavitr- he thinks.
But before tonight he thought he didn’t, it’s confusing trying to navigate this old feeling returning. He gently tilts his face up, staring down into his pretty eyes, “No.. I don’t.” He answers truthfully despite his embarrassment, “Do you love me..?” Pavitr cups his face, he can’t help but relax within his gentle touch, it’s different than Gabriella, it’s different from everything else.
“I do love you Pavi baby,” He hums, he smiles a little when it seems to cheer up his boy. “You promise?” He giggles softly, “I pinky promise,” he softens as their pinkies gently hook together. The two spend the rest of the night cuddling and sipping at their drinks. They lay together exchanging loving words and gentle kisses, they’re so affectionate it’s almost surprising what happened in that same bedroom earlier.
As the hours pass, while they hold each other as they slowly drift to sleep, he thinks about the older sand the things he’s done. Even if Miguel is a sick and rotten man Pavitr still loves him, he can’t help but to love him, they both filled the holes the other lacked but they truly loved each other, just in some twisted way.