INDY

I woke up alone, but with Bucky’s scent clinging to me. Warm sunlight filtered in through the windows over me and I blinked heavily as I sat up. Bucky and Pepper were sitting across the kitchen table from each other, sipping from mugs and talking with serious expressions.

I rolled over and stretched along the couch before sitting up.

“Hi.”

There was a small, semi-suspicious figure peeking around the end of the hallway. Morgan smiled at me impishly and waved. I hadn’t really gotten to talk to her last night. I was still keyed up from the events of the last day and had lost most of my energy by the time I’d cried myself out on Pepper’s shoulder.

“Hi.” I stood and approached her, glancing over my shoulder to make sure we weren’t drawing too much attention; clearly, she considered this to be top secret. Bucky glanced up at me for a half-second while Pepper was reaching for sugar and winked inconspicuously. I grinned and kneeled down next to her. “I didn’t get to meet you last night. I’m Indy.”

Her eyes, round like Pepper’s and dark like Tony’s, widened in recognition. “Like the Indy Drone.”

I felt a disbelieving chuckle leave me. “The Indy Drone?”

She nodded and reached out, small digits wrapping around the side of my hand without hesitation. “Daddy made her for me.”

She pulled me with her all the way to her bedroom, then released my hand and wandered over to a desk. At first, I didn’t see anything out of the ordinary. Then she reached out and tapped a button on top of a tiny form I hadn’t noticed.

The thing was maybe the size of a toaster, with a paneled section that slid apart as it lit up from within. It transformed on the desktop, small motors lifting the thing so it hovered quietly in the air. Blue light, very similar to that given off by Tony’s arc reactors, shined from each edge and crevice. When it was done rearranging itself, it was vaguely plane-shaped, but small, compact. It had a screen on top, which had buttons Morgan was pressing now.

“Hey, kiddo,” came a startlingly familiar voice. My own. “It’s 8:42 am. If you haven’t brushed your hair already, mom is gonna throw a fit.”

Morgan looked back at me with a small smile. “Daddy said her job is to watch my back.”

Tony tossed a comm link to me and gave me a smirk. “Your job is to watch my back now, kid.”

The room was blurry. I’d thought I’d cried as much as I possibly could last night, but tears were running down my face again. Tony had used my voice for the AI in his daughter’s robot companion. He had even named it the Indy Drone, and now that I had a better view of it, I could see “INDY” painted onto one of its wings. He really had forgiven me.

“That’s you, right?” Morgan asked as I stared, open-mouthed.

“Yeah.” I grinned widely, tears making the corners of my vision blur. “That’s me.”

O o 0 o O

Morgan and I returned to the kitchen to find plates of food waiting for us. Bucky gave me a subtle, warm look as I sat next to him. I felt oddly shy in front of him now. What was he thinking about when he looked at me that way? What did last night mean?

Pepper hid a smile behind the rim of her coffee mug. Had she seen us curled around each other this morning? I could almost hear her saying, “Not together, huh?”.

We ate companionably, Bucky’s knee brushing mine beneath the table now and then and sending my pulse fluttering.

“So,” Pepper said once breakfast had been finished and cleared away. We stood on the cabin’s porch, getting ready to hit the road. “I have the place set up and ready for you. I’ve given Bucky the address. It’s far enough away that you should be safe for a while. If you need anything else, call me. Oh, there’s also a package in your SUV that Tony thought you might want. " She looked uncomfortable for a moment. "I would have sent it on to you, but... I always hoped you'd come back."

“Thank you, Pepper,” I said, leaning in to give her a hug. Morgan, who sat on her hip, threw her arm around me as well. “I’ll come by more often. Once I’m not leading God-knows-who to you.”

She grabbed my hand and gave it one last squeeze. “Make sure you do. I’ve missed you.”

“Bye Indy!” Morgan said as I backed away, giving me a wide smile and an exuberant wave.

“Bye, kiddo.” I grinned.

“And Bucky?” Pepper called as we drew nearer to the SUV.

We both looked up at her curiously.

“Take care of my girl.”

Bucky relaxed noticeably as he ducked his head. “Yes, ma’am.”

Pepper and Morgan turned and went back inside, and Bucky smoothly slid the keys out of my hand.

“Hey! I can drive!” I tried to snatch them back from him, but he was nearly a foot taller than me and a lot more agile.

He smirked down at me, looking so much more… open than he used to be. It was disarming. “You fell asleep after I did last night. That means you got maybe 6 hours of sleep. You need more. A lot more after yesterday.”

“Bucky, I’ll be fine,” I said, rolling my eyes in an attempt to quash the blush on my cheeks at the reminder of our night together.

He grabbed my chin between his fingers and tilted my face up to look me in the eye. Then he traced the bruise-like shadows I knew must still be beneath them; if I was being honest, I did still feel exhausted.

“Don’t make me throw you in the backseat,” he warned in a low murmur, his tender expression at odds with his words. “Get in the back. Lie down. Get some rest for a few hours while I drive.”

“Fine,” I said, nearly breathless from the contact. “Bossy.”

“You’re always calling me Sarge,” he said, leaning closer as his smirk returned. “It's your turn to fall in line, Doll.”

My heart thumped hard, my mouth suddenly dry. I took a step back and turned to the back door, opening it and looking at him with a “you happy now?” look.

The corner of his mouth twitched, and he stepped forward to open the driver’s door, pecking me on the cheek as he did and whispering, “Good girl.”

I hopped into the SUV and laid down with my face hidden against the seat back. It took a while to calm down enough to fall asleep.

BUCKY

The drive down south gave me way too much time to think.

What the hell was happening between Indy and I? That kiss. Her body between my hands. My lip between her teeth. It was everything I’d been dreaming of for months, and it had been nowhere near enough. I was trying to keep myself in check as much as I could, but I had unleashed something not easily forced back again. The farther we got from Pepper’s cabin, the more I was growing to resent myself for my moment of weakness last night. I was still hesitant to really go all in with her; what I’d said last night… I’d meant. The kind of intimacy I craved with her would require me to be transparent about all of my many hangups. I couldn’t put all that off onto her. Not now that the very people responsible for it were after her.

Speaking of… I glanced over my shoulder at her face, softly frowning like she was worried about our situation even in sleep. What “side project” was Fury talking about that had drawn Hydra’s attention? I’d wanted to ask her right away, but with her injuries and all the emotions running high last night, it hadn’t seemed like the right time. I could wait until things between us were slightly more stable; we had nothing but time to kill now. 

Sam had promised me before we left that he and the team would find our mole and secure things back in New York while Indy and I laid low. Part of me hoped their search went by quickly so we could return home. But another, more selfish part, was enjoying the excuse to keep her so close. She needed protection. And what safer place than sequestered away with the human weapon, right? I was both thrilled and terrified of the potential there. 

Indy slept in the back until half-way through Tennessee. We stopped for gas and food, then Indy took the wheel.

“I never did ask, where are we heading, anyway?” She asked, buckling her seatbelt and turning the key over in the ignition. She was looking much better now, with more color in her face and less dullness around her eyes.

“Texas,” I said, nodding to the GPS display and holding out a yellow envelope Pepper had given me. “This is our cover.”

I watched her with one sweaty palm while she flipped through official papers that would help us establish ourselves inconspicuously in the area. Then she squinted in confusion into the envelope and I knew she’d seen them. She tilted the envelope to the side and two rings fell out into her palm. She froze, staring at them with slightly wider eyes than usual.

“Pepper thought it would keep most unwanted attention away from us. Neither of us is exactly unattractive. But if we’re married, it’s less likely people will approach us to… try to get closer.” Why did I feel so stiff and awkward explaining this? It’s not like it was my idea.

“Right. That makes sense,” she said with a slightly strained voice, still staring at the rings. She lifted the thicker, plain band out of her palm and held it out to me without looking up.

I took it from her and slid it onto my vibranium ring finger, frowning when it rattled, fitting just a little funny. Indy blew out a wobbly breath and held the thin ring between her forefinger and thumb, looking at her own left hand like she’d never seen it before. My throat constricted painfully.

“You know, I always thought the first time I did this would be at an altar,” she chuckled quietly, voice shaking.

I reached out and took the ring from her slowly. She looked up at me curiously.

“We might not have an altar, but… I can help get part of this right.” I looked her in the eye seriously, took her left hand in mine and slid the ring onto her finger. My fingers lingered around hers, ghosting up to her wrist, still red from the chains she’d been bound with almost a full day ago.

Her eyes were nearly green in this light, staring at me like she was waiting for something.

Stop touching her. Stop wanting her. There’s a reason you haven’t let yourself tell her the truth — all of it. There’s a reason you won’t even let yourself think it.

I lowered my eyes, dropping her hands as gently as I could. “Let’s get on the road,” I said quietly.

I tried not to notice the disappointment on her face as she turned the wheel and put the SUV into drive.

O o 0 o O

It took us another 15 hours of driving to make it to our destination: Garner State Park. There were a couple of residential communities about 10 miles in either direction, and the nearest city was 31 miles north. Very remote.

Tony had apparently bought a similar cabin to the one Pepper and Morgan lived in on park property. Only a few dirt trails branched throughout the 1,500 or so acres of wilderness. Cliffs and tall rock ledges rose here and there over the tops of thick, dark trees. I saw more than one armadillo on our way to the cabin, pretty far in, and a hell of a lot more cactus than I was expecting.

The outside of the cabin was done in exposed wood, with a shaded porch housing a bench and a small card table. There was a smaller building adjoining it that looked like a garage, but Indy told me was probably a workshop, knowing Tony.

The inside was pre-decorated in a rustic, grandma’s-house type of way. But Indy pushed a button I hadn’t noticed at first in the entryway and lights came on, electricity started buzzing, the air conditioner started blowing. Other panels of lights and buttons flipped out of different walls. This century was something else.

I caught Indy looking at me with a strangely amused expression.

“What?”

“Nothing,” she said, smirking and shaking her head as we carried our bags further into the living space. “It’s just easy to forget sometimes that you’re a literal relic.”

I rolled my eyes at her and scowled lightly.

There were two bedrooms, situated directly across from each other, with a bathroom in between. Indy claimed the one on the right and I took the one on the left.

We spent about half an hour dragging all of our stuff inside, then I unhitched my bike and pulled it around next to the SUV. Indy carted a bunch of tools, bits of machinery, and the box Pepper had given her from Tony into the workshop (sometimes, I hated how often she was right), and I hid weapons strategically around the cabin, making sure we each had multiple in our bedrooms.

Once everything was unpacked, we found ourselves standing awkwardly in the living room. I hadn’t realized until now that we had both been distracting ourselves with the work, the same way we did back at home. When we were occupied with thoughts of security and professionalism, it was easy to look each other in the eye and speak normally.

Now that it was just the two of us and whatever thoughts and feelings we hadn’t let out yet… well, she wasn’t the only one shifting uncomfortably from side to side. The sun was beginning to set and unless there were hikers or campers out this far into the park after dark, there was no one around for miles. It should have been a comforting thought, given our predicament.

But all I could think about was how loud she could be out here if we-

Too far. Way too far.

“Well,” she said slowly, swinging her arms back and forth, smacking her palms together almost anxiously. “We’re going to need to find a grocery store tomorrow. Aside from nonperishables, this place hasn’t been stocked in years. And I guess we should look over the stuff Pepper gave us a little more.”

I didn’t think she’d ever seemed so unsure of herself. Not when we’d first shaken hands, and I’d condescended to her and glared at her. Not when I’d hijacked her mission and made her think I didn’t believe in her. Not even when I’d asked her not to kiss me that night in her darkened office. She was as bewildered and - I suspected - annoyed by our dynamic now as I was. As any rational person would be. 

“Sure.”

She rounded the half-wall into the kitchen, leaning against the green-topped counter as she pulled out the yellow envelope our fake wedding rings had come from. The modestly-sized diamond in the ring on Indy’s finger caught in the overhead light as she shook out the small stack of documents. Fake IDs, quickly doctored ownership papers for the cabin and our vehicles, credentials for whatever jobs we could want in case this weird exile lasted longer than anticipated.

Indy’s nose wrinkled. “Ugh. Belinda Thayer. She gave me my own first name as a cover.”

“How can that be safe?”

“Well, I legally changed my name to Indy when I was emancipated. But with everything I did to make sure nothing was leaked, they would have had to do a lot of digging to even find the name ‘Indy’ attached to any of my work. Most of it was under a fake name.”

“Oh, let me guess. Hugh Janus?” I asked dryly, leaning forward on the counter next to her.

She looked up at me finally, giving me the kind of face I was always giving Sam. “That’s way too overdone. If it hadn’t been so important that it seem legit, I would have gone with something like…” she looked up at the ceiling and shrugged pensively, “Betty Drillzer.”

We made straight eye contact for a solid second before we both looked away laughing.

“Jesus Christ,” I muttered, wishing that name coming out of her mouth hadn’t brought quite so many thoughts to the forefront of my mind. “You are a lot better at that than I am.”

She shrugged and smiled. “I’m the creative one. There’s nothing wrong with that. Anyway, what’s your name?”

I held up my own fake ID, then laid it down beside hers on the counter, my elbow brushing hers. “Jeff Thayer.”

I don’t know if she realized the way she shifted toward me at that small bit of contact. Her eyes were down on our spread of documents, but her shoulders were angled toward me, even leaning in a little.

I watched out of the corner of my eye while she scanned details, chewing on her lower lip the way I wished I was right now. Her shirt hugged her up to her mostly-exposed collarbone, long-sleeves rolled up now that we were in mid-90-degree heat. She lifted her hand and ran it through her hair, her fingers slowing near the side of her neck.

Unfortunately for me, she looked up then. And I didn’t look away. She had to see it. How badly I wanted to pull her to me and see where things finally went when I wasn’t standing in the way of them. Hell, I’d already given in enough that she knew I had feelings for her. That I wanted her in ways I shouldn’t.

But I didn’t know how to get past the horrible gut-deep feeling that something horrible would happen to her if I gave into this. Whether she was taken or hurt by Hydra, or if something happened and I… I couldn’t let that happen.

So when her eyes softened, and I was certain she was about to do what I wanted most — what I was growing to fear most — I cleared my throat and looked away.

There are enough deaths to blame myself for. Hers would destroy me, no matter how it happened.

Part of me hated myself for doing this. To both of us. I wished I could just indulge in the opportunity that was practically slapping me across the face. But it was involuntary, forcing myself not to take the things I wanted, suppressing every desire and selfish thought. It was something a therapist would probably label a "coping mechanism". Humans are creatures of habit. And she might have been the worst one I’d ever had.

“I’m going to go take a shower,” I said hoarsely.

“Sure,” she said evenly, after an almost indiscernible pause. She scooped together the papers in front of her and tapped them briskly against the counter before turning away and retreating in a measured pace to her room, closing the door behind her.

“Damn it,” I sighed, leaning forward and covering my eyes before ruffling my short hair roughly with both hands.

Frustration was a familiar emotion. Much more so than the ones I felt when Indy looked at me the way she had just then. Feelings I’d thought had died out decades ago. And the mortifying truth was that she was the person I was most used to talking about these things with; the ways I differed from ‘normal’ people. She’d always been sympathetic, nonjudgmental, supportive. To the point that I’d frequently wondered whether she was sane herself.

It wouldn’t have been fair of me to expect that attitude to continue once my… abnormalities manifested this way. I was hurting her. I didn’t know how to keep my hands to myself. Didn’t know how to stop pulling them away once the damage was done. I was deeply, truly fucked up.

But we all knew that.

I swallowed the thick knot in my throat and set my jaw, heading to the bathroom to wash our 27 hour road-trip and my own self-loathing off of me.