The thick drops of the rain hit the pavement around her. A cold gust of wind caused a shiver to run through her as she strode down the block. Daisy turned at the corner, hugging her leather jacket a little tighter around herself. In the distance the parking lot where she’d parked her van became clearer through the lashes of rain. She quickened her pace, not that it mattered much; she was already soaked to her underwear. Nevertheless, she heaved a relieved breath when she reached the cover of the parking lot.
The lot was empty, nobody wanting to park in a dodgy suburb like this, especially not at this time, but it was convenient for her. She walked over to her van, unlocking it and getting in the back. She closed the door behind her, dropped the bag she had been carrying, and grabbed a duffle bag, rummaging around until she found some dry clothes. She took off her leather jacket, ignoring the stinging in her arms, and almost pouting to herself when she saw it was dripping.
She took off the rest of her clothes, quickly putting on fresh sweatpants and an old, oversized band shirt she was fairly sure she stole from someone else. She almost wanted to drive out like this, but the lines on her arms made her nauseous, so she grabbed a hoody – not hers either, she thought – and pulled it on over her shirt. She put her combat boots back on and took the bag she dropped earlier.
She pulled out a sandwich and a bottle of water and climbed over the control to go sit behind the wheel. Taking small bites of her sandwich, she went over her plan for the coming days again. She’d drive the last bit of distance to New York today and tomorrow, where she would go hunting some anti-Inhuman groups. Just because the Avengers where stationed in New York, it didn’t mean that all the crimes had disappeared. Especially not crimes that where often justified with the Accords. Gods, she hated those accords.
She looked at her half-eaten sandwich, shrugged and placed it on the passenger’s seat. She grimaced when she stretched her arms and reached for a small bottle of pills next. She took two, and the bottle of water, and made quick work of it. She plugged her phone into the radio, swiped away the missed calls and put on a Fall Out Boy playlist, mixed with something Spotify had selected for her. She smiled faintly when the beat of Irresistible filled the van, started the car, and backed out of her parking spot.
With Pete Wentz screaming in her ear, she drove out into the night.
///
Bobbi was lying on the couch and staring at the ceiling when someone suddenly dropped down next to her. Startled, she drew a knife out of nowhere, before realising it was only Natasha, who just raised an eyebrow.
“I didn’t hear you coming in,” she mumbled, putting the knife back. Natasha raised her other eyebrow. “You wouldn’t say.”
“Yeah, well, staring at the ceiling is very distracting.”
“I can see that.”
Bobbi came up into a sitting position and glared at the redhead. “Any reason for barging in and disturbing my fairly peaceful mindless gazing into nothing?”
Natasha didn’t answer immediately, just gazing at her with a look in her eyes that made Bobbi incredibly uncomfortable. “I do have a reason,” Natasha said eventually. “I’m dragging you down to the kitchen for dinner and coffee.”
Bobbi grumbled. “I don’t want to go down. There are other people there. I don't want to be with other people.”
Natasha rolled her eyes. “Tony is in the labs, Rhodey is still busy rehabbing, and Vision is off trying to talk to Wanda and the others. It’ll be just us. Maybe the spiderkid,” she added. Bobbi nodded slowly. “I like the spiderkid. He’s okay.”
The Avenger stood up and offered her a hand. Bobbi debated with herself for another second before just sighing and accepting the hand. Natasha dragged her towards the stairs, and Bobbi was glad for it. She’d rather take some stairs than awkwardly stand in the elevator. She’d always hated elevators.
They walked into the kitchen, Bobbi making a beeline for the coffee machine while Natasha at a much slower pace made for the fridge. She pulled out two sandwiches and a Tupperware of soup. “Soup or bread?”
Bobbi hummed. “Bit of both?”
“Can do.”
Natasha shoved the sandwiches in her direction and started heating up the soup. “Have you called Hunter lately?”
Bobbi put down a mug of coffee in front of her, receiving a nod in response and turned back to make another for herself. “No,” she simply said. Natasha gave her a quick glance. “I know you had a big fight and all that, but did you at least tell him that you’re safe?”
Bobbi continued pouring coffee, adding some honey to her mug. Natasha scrunched her nose, but let it go. “Bobbi.”
Bobbi turned around. “Natasha.”
Natasha shook her head and went back to the soup, nodding to herself when she saw it was warm. She took two bowls and procured two spoons, handing one to Bobbi and keeping one for herself.
They ate in silence for a while, until the elevator dinged, and Peter walked out. “Hi Natasha, Agent Morse. Is the coffee still warm, miss?”
Natasha made a vague gesture and Peter seemed to think that was enough. Bobbi gave the kid a look. “You know you can call me Bobbi, right?”
Peter blushed a bit, awkwardly shuffling on his feet. “I know mi- Bobbi. But it’s weird. Aunt May taught me manners. I’m supposed to call people older than me ‘miss’ or ‘madam’.”
“How old do you think I am, kid?” Bobbi asked him, honestly curious.
“Thirty-ish?” he said sheepishly. Natasha chuckled. “Kid, I am thirty-ish, or thirty-one, I think. You really think we’re the same age?” Peter gaped at her. “You’re thirty?!”
Natasha swallowed a mouthful of soup. “Yeah. Wait, how old did you think I was?”
Peter paled ever so slightly, looking like he wanted to be literally anywhere else. “Thirty-five,” he mumbled softly, almost asked, really.
Now Bobbi laughed. Natasha threw her a glare and looked back at the kid, who visible shrunk under her gaze. She immediately softened, causing Bobbi to laugh even harder. Natasha ignored her completely. “Well, I’m not. Bobbi here is twenty-five.”
Peter exhaled slowly and nodded. “Okay. That’s… you look older,” he said apologetically.
“Thanks, it’s the trauma,” Bobbi deadpanned, grinning slightly when Peter smiled at that. “That’s fair,” he said casually. He picked up the mug of coffee he’d been pouring. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go back to Mr Stark. I better hurry with his coffee.”
Natasha gave him a sympathetic look. “Is he being annoying or rude again?” Peter shook his head. “No. Just… Just frustrated. There’s this person trying to hack him, and he’s having trouble keeping her out. Whoever this skyenet person is, she’s good. I’m not of much use except for coffee, so,” he gestured to the mug with a sheepish smile.
Bobbi dropped her spoon in her bowl. “Skyenet?” she asked softly. Peter looked at her. “Yeah. With and ‘e’ after sky. It’s a weird spelling.” Bobbi got up, her dinner and coffee completely forgotten. “Take me down,” she commanded.
Peter’s eyes widened and he quickly led her to the elevator. Natasha sighed, took both her and Bobbi’s mugs and followed them into the elevator. Bobbi was so distracted that she didn’t even had time to feel uncomfortable the ride down.
The doors pinged and opened, and Bobbi burst out, making her way towards a very frustrated Tony with a few long strides. He looked up, almost immediately annoyed at their presence. “Do you have to? I’m busy,” he snapped. Peter quickly placed the mug with coffee next to him. Tony took it and turned back to his computer. Natasha rolled her eyes and slapped him in the back of his neck.
“Ow! What…” he started, but at Natasha’s pointed look, he stopped. “Oh, right. Thanks, kid.”
Peter smiled and happily made his way back to his own station where he continued tinkering with what looked like new web shooters. Bobbi was too busy staring at Tony’s screen to notice any of it. Tony turned to give her an expectant look. “How can I help you?” he asked, sarcasm lacing his voice.
“Did she send any messages? Can you send her a message?”
“She sent me this.”
He opened another screen with a single message.
Try to keep up, tin can.
“’Tin can’? She’s sassy,” Natasha quipped.
“She is,” Bobbi agreed. “You have no idea.”
Tony glanced up at her. “You know her?” Bobbi nodded and motioned to the keypad. “May I?”
Tony shrugged. “I can’t keep her out anyways. She’s good.”
Bobbi pulled the keypad towards her, scoffing at the man. “Of course she is. I know for a fact she’s hacked you before. She’s hacked NASA for fun, and she once hacked shield on local Wi-Fi with a laptop she won in a bet.”
“And you know this why?”
Bobbi tapped enter and looked back at him. “Because I used to work with her.”
///
Her fingers flew over the keys, rows of numbers and letters flashing before her eyes. Stark hadn’t responded to her message yet, but she knew he would have to give up soon. She had to give it to him, his security was much better than last time she had hacked him. But then again, a lot of the improvements had been recommendations made by her. It was almost unfair, but it was funnier than hacking the NASA again, and at least Stark had money she could use.
A soft ping notified her of a message. She opened the chat grinning, fully expecting to see some sort of sassy remark from the billionaire. But what she read made her heart skip a few beats.
Hey, rockstar. Getting bored again?
Fuck.
No. Nononono, this was not supposed to happen. She was supposed to hack Stark, take some money, kill some bad guys, maybe some HYDRA guys, and then disappear. No strings attached, no one knowing where she was. Another ping.
Thought you preferred NASA. Anyways, you in NY?
Fuckfuckfuckfuck.
She closed the chat, fingers flying even faster. She pulled 10k from Stark’s personal account and started deleting all traces of herself. She opened the chat one last time, staring at the two messages. Two simple messages, and yet she knew exactly who it was on the other side of that screen. She hesitated for a moment, then typed a single message back.
Not for long. Don’t look for me.
She sent it, saw the dots of someone typing appearing and added something to her earlier messages.
No goodbye is easier than a spy’s goodbye, isn’t it?
The dots disappeared. She felt her heart clench painfully. She sent the message purely to hurt, purely so she wouldn’t go after her. It would work, she thought. But it still hurt.
She closed her laptop, perhaps a little too harshly, and got out of her van. She pulled on her leather jacket over her hoodie – Bobbi’s hoodie, she realised now – and pulled a beanie over her recently cut and died hair and locked the van. She leaned against the van, trying to take a few controlled breaths, because she could feel her heart racing, and her arms were aching, but it was nothing, nothing, compared to…
She punched the van. Hard. Pain shot through her arm, and she let out a scream of pain and frustration. How could one woman throw all her plans upside down just like that? She had a plan. Leave. Disappear. Or maybe even… No. Not that.
She softly prodded her arm, hissing when another stab of pain shot through her. Some twisted part of her was satisfied with the pain, but she quickly shook her head. Pain was bad. She should avoid pain. Or so people said. She shook herself, turned on her heels, and walked away. The watchdogs were waiting.
///
Bobbi was back at the kitchen island, twisting the now empty coffee mug in her hands. Natasha was seated across from her, a look of concern on her face that only those who really knew her could decipher. Bobbi didn’t notice it.
Tony took the empty mug and replaced it with a full one. She looked up for a second. “Did you…”
“I put your disgusting honey in it, yes.”
Bobbi nodded and took a sip, not even grimacing as the way too hot liquid burned down her throat. Tony threw her a concerned look and sat down next to Natasha. After a few minutes of silence, he scraped his throat. “What is a spies goodbye?”
After seeing that Bobbi made no move to answer, Natasha sighed. “A spy’s goodbye is when an agent can’t say goodbye to their team due to safety reasons. The team will say goodbye without making direct contact, all of them on their own.”
Tony took a moment to process that, before looking at Bobbi. “You did that?”
Bobbi nodded, not looking up. “We did. We were… compromised. We were in a bar, and then people kept buying shots. The whole team was there. Everyone was sitting apart, but they were all there. They drank with us, but we couldn’t say goodbye. Not really.”
She scoffed, taking another sip of her scalding hot coffee. “Apparently, she’s still pissed. Which is fair.”
Tony frowned. “It doesn’t sound like it was your fault.”
“You wouldn’t get it.”
“Try me.”
Bobbi downed the rest of her coffee. “Daisy’s whole life people have abandoned her, just up and left her. No goodbyes, no love, nothing but betrayal and hurt and pain. Trip died, and she couldn’t say goodbye. She got powers, and the people she saw as family got scared of her and avoided her. She found her father after 20 years of searching, but we had to wipe his memory and now he doesn’t remember her. Her best friend got sucked into a portal to another planet, her other friend ran from SHIELD without a word, which also hurt her, even if she said it didn’t. And then I had to leave, and I didn’t say goodbye either. She trusted me, and I left her,” she spat, disgusted with herself.
Silence fell over the kitchen. When Tony opened his mouth, Bobbi abruptly rose. “I’m going to bed.”
She left her mug on the counter, avoided both their eyes, and left.
Once in her room she dropped on her bed. It was a familiar position for her by now. Ever since she came here, looking for a place to stay after fighting with Hunter, she’d spent much of her days lying on her bed, missing her friends and family, feeling guilty over leaving them. She knew there hadn’t really been a better option, but she hated herself for it nevertheless. She though about Daisy. First as Skye, the young, eager girl she’d met after coming back from her undercover opp. They’d sparred together, the younger girl in awe with the idea of learning from her, and she’d been flattered. They became fast friends in and outside the gym, occasionally watching movies together in the common room with a beer. Bobbi still felt her gut clench when she remembered her role in the ‘real SHIELD’ back then.
Then Skye had gotten her powers, and everyone started avoiding her. Bobbi hadn’t, one of the few things she praised herself for. And then she’d had to hunt the girl. She couldn’t believe Skye had been willing to forgive her for that. Then Skye became Daisy, and the girl had helped her get back into form. Bobbi had taken notes on Daisy’s progress with her powers, and Daisy had practiced fine tuning by massaging her knee. It had been a bit awkward at first, but when Daisy realised Bobbi wasn’t scared of her, they quickly fell back in their old pattern. Jemma went missing, Lincoln left, Bobbi fought with Hunter, who kept leaving for missions as well, and they comforted each other with more movies and beer and silent company. And then that mission in Russia, where it all went south.
She remembered the pain in Daisy’s eyes as she raised her shot to her. The faint tremor in her hands before the girl downed the shot. And there was nothing Bobbi could do about it.
She rolled on her side, hugging a pillow to her chest. Flashes of Daisy shot through her mind. Her smile when Bobbi hugged her. Her eyes when Bobbi agreed to watch some random romcom movie Daisy loved. Her hands on her knee, ever so gently vibrating the muscles, the pain fading from her like snow melting in the early morning sun. Daisy, Daisy, Daisy.
And she’d ruined that. She’d destroyed all that by not saying goodbye. She could have called, or texted, but she hadn’t. She’d left, and she hadn’t looked back.
A single tear rolled down her cheek.
///
Assholes. Fucking assholes.
Daisy groaned as she bumped into the wall, her vision darkening for her eyes. She pushed the palm of her hand down on her thigh, breathing heavily as she almost blacked out from the pain. When she considered dying as an option and a solution, she forgot how much it fucking hurt.
She felt around in her pocket for her phone, cursing some more when she saw the crack across the thing. She tried turning it one, but it was dead to the world. She pocketed it and kept walking. Actually, it was more like stumbling, one hand on her thigh and the other braced against the wall, but potato potahto.
She turned another corner and promptly tripped over her own feet. Trying to minimize the damage, she caught herself with her arms, before realising those were fractured in multiple places, and she whined softly. The ground was cold and wet underneath her, but now that she was lying down, it didn’t bother her so much. She was just so tired.
She closed her eyes, feeling darkness wash over her, and smiled. A quick rest sounded like a great idea. Her leg didn’t hurt so much like this. Her head didn’t pound so much like this. It was almost peaceful.
When she woke again, she was cold, so fucking cold. She shifted, only to grimace in pain when she moved her leg. No moving then. She tried moving her fingers, feeling little stabs of pain go up through her arms, but it was manageable. She moved her fingers over the ground, wondering at the puddle she was lying in. She didn’t remember lying down in water. She slowly brought her hand up to her line of vision, frowning at her red fingertips. Then realisation downed on her.
Ah, that was bad. Maybe she would die after all.
She wondered who’d find her. Some random guy walking his dog, or a criminal. Maybe one of the watchdogs. She didn’t like that.
She thought back to earlier that day. Maybe Bobbi would find her. Maybe her message hadn’t been enough to keep the stubborn woman from trying to find her. And if Bobbi tried to find her, she would find her.
The thought made her weirdly sad. Bobbi didn’t deserve to find her corpse. She should be happy with the Avengers, saving the world with her skills, or fixing up the other Avengers with the medical degree she had. Bobbi was amazing. Badass. Smart. Sweet.
Bobbi had trained with her, taught her, laughed with her. Bobbi had stayed when the rest of the team was ready to spit her out because of her powers. Bobbi had helped her control them, trusted her enough to be her lab rat, treated her like she was human. They’d comforted each other, when Lincoln left, and Hunter kept taking random missions. They’d watched movies, Daisy cuddled up against Bobbi because she was the only person that wasn’t afraid to be near her. Except for Fitz, but Jemma was gone by that time and he was barely at the base. They missed a part of themselves in the people that were missing, but together they almost formed one whole person, and they were okay. And then Bobbi had to leave.
She regretted sending that last message. It hadn’t been Bobbi’s fault. It hurt like hell, but that wasn’t Bobbi’s fault. A spy’s goodbye was better than no goodbye, she realised that now. She should really call her. Apologize, before it was too late. She reached for the phone in her pocket, before remembering faintly that it was dead. She cursed. Why did the universe hate her so.
She felt the darkness at the edges of her vision closing in and shook her head. She didn’t want to die. Or, if she had to die, it wouldn’t be bleeding out in an alley in the suburbs of New York. She had to get Bobbi here, before she died. She had to apologize. So, she did the only thing she could think of.
She quaked.
///
Bobbi didn’t know what woke her up. If you asked her later, she would say it was just an inkling. A feeling that something was happening. She got out of bed, pulled on her boots, and made her way to the common room. Natasha was on the couch, reading a book, but she looked up when Bobbi entered. “Hello?”
Bobbi didn’t respond, instead walking over to the window wall that looked out over the city. “Friday?” she asked.
“Yes, Agent Morse?”
“Check the city for unusual tectonic activities.”
A pause.
“There was an earthquake of 2.6 on the Richter scale in Manhattan a few minutes ago.”
“Daisy,” she whispered.
“Bobbi, what is going on?” Natasha asked from behind her, her book forgotten in her lap. Bobbi turned around, a determined look in her eyes. “Daisy’s in trouble and we’re going to get her.”
She walked away without another word, only stopping to put on a jacket, not even giving Natasha a chance to protest. Not that she was going to. The redhead simply placed her book on the table and followed her. “Friday, alert Tony what we’re doing. Have a bed and medical ready for when we come back.”
“Will do, Ms Romanoff.”
Natasha took Bobbi up the stairs, all the way to the roof, where a quinjet stood at the ready at all times. They got on board, Natasha sitting down in the pilot seat, gesturing for Bobbi to take the co-pilot seat. Bobbi shook her head and started pacing up and down. Natasha rolled her eyes and took off. Friday had already put in the coordinates, and it was only a few minutes before they reached their destination.
“Bob, you probably want to sit down for the landing.”
Bobbi reluctantly sat down, standing up as soon as the jet touched the ground. Natasha opened the doors, took a gun, and followed Bobbi out. She cloaked the quinjet for good measure, although she doubted anyone would be outside at 3 am.
Bobbi stalked off in a for Natasha random direction and she followed with a huff. She caught up with the tall blonde just as they rounded a corner and Bobbi stopped short. The only reason Natasha didn’t bump into her was her excessive spy training and reflexes.
“Bobbi,” she started annoyedly, but Bobbi ignored her, dashing forward to a figure lying on the ground.
Bobbi knelt next to Daisy, trying to ignore the disturbingly large puddle of blood on the ground. “Daisy! Hey, Dais.”
Daisy remained unmoving. Bobbi checked her pulse and heaved a sigh of relief when she felt something flutter. It was very weak though, and she quickly gestured Natasha closer. Natasha looked down at the young unconscious girl. “This is her? She’s so young,” she murmured. For some reason she’d expected someone older. She didn’t even know why, trauma had hit her at a young age too.
“She is. Help me,” Bobbi interrupted her train of thought impatiently. Natasha shook herself and knelt by her legs. Bobbi motioned to her the girl’s thigh. “You do something about this, I’ll check her over.” Natasha nodded and focussed on her work. Bobbi carefully lifted Daisy’s upper body to take off her jacket, which was thoroughly soaked with her blood. Bobbi swallowed the lump in the throat away, when she vaguely recognized the bloody hoodie.
She checked Daisy’s upper body for any visible wounds, and then for breaks and fractures. The girl twitched when she softly rolled up her sleeves and prodded her arms to look for fractures, and Bobbi immediately stilled. “Daisy?” she asked breathlessly. Natasha’s eyes flitted to Daisy’s face, but she continued to bind Daisy’s thigh with strips of her own shirt.
Daisy’s eyes fluttered open, the hazy slowly focussing on her face. “Bob,” she croaked. Bobbi nodded, tears welling up in her eyes. “Hey, rockstar,” she breathed. The corner of Daisy’s mouth rose slightly. “’M sorry,” she mumbled. “The message. ‘M sorry. Not… your fault.”
Bobbi shook her head. “Please stop apologizing like you’re on your deathbed. We’re gonna fix you up, okay?” Daisy gave her a confused and somewhat disappointed look, that Bobbi chose to ignore for now. “We?” Daisy asked, her mind slowly catching up, her eyes becoming a little clearer.
Natasha tied of her self-made bandage and moved into Daisy’s haze line of vision. “Hi there.”
Daisy’s eyes widened in what would have been a comical way had she not been slowly bleeding out in an alleyway. She looked at Bobbi, who just smiled back. “Am I good to pick you up?”
Daisy nodded slowly, and Bobbi put one arm under her shoulders and another under her knees, lifting her up bridal style. She couldn’t keep the sad smile off her face when Daisy curled into her, whimpering quietly. “It’s okay, rockstar. I’ve got you,” she murmured softly.
Natasha took Daisy’s discarded jacket and lead them back to the jet. Bobbi carried Daisy inside, sitting down in the co-pilot seat with Daisy in her lap. Natasha took the pilot seat again and took off without further delay. Bobbi looked down at the younger girl and frowned when she saw that she’d fallen unconscious again. She looked up at Natasha to find her friend already staring at her. “Thank you,” she said. “For coming with me.”
Natasha almost looked offended. “Of course.” She saw the worry in Bobbi’s eyes as the blonde brushed some of Daisy’s hair from her forehead. “She’s gonna be okay, Bobbi. We’re gonna take care of her.”
///
When Daisy woke up, she was surrounded by soft pillows and fluffy blankets, an IV in her right arm. She kept her eyes closed, regulated her breathing, just like May had taught her, as she tried to take in her surroundings with her vibrations. A familiar heartbeat next to her had her eyes snapping over despite her training. She turned her head to the side. Bobbi.
The tall woman was curled up uncomfortably in a chair on her left side, her hand outstretched towards the bed in a way that had Daisy assuming she’d been holding her hand. Hesitantly testing out her muscles she lifted her left hand above the blankets, frowning momentarily at the cast around her arm. She moved her arm to Bobbi’s hand, tentatively taking it in her own. Bobbi stirred.
Daisy didn’t look up from their hands, instead slowly intertwining their fingers. Bobbi’s hand squeezed her ever so softly. It didn’t even hurt.
She looked up into Bobbi’s tired but beautiful blue eyes. “Hi,” she said, her voice hoarse from disuse.
Bobbi’s smile was so wide it had to hurt her face. “Hey,” she said back. “Are you in pain?” Daisy mentally went over her body for a moment. Her thigh didn’t hurt per se, more just a dull ache. Her arms didn’t hurt if she didn’t move them. Her head didn’t pound. “No,” she answered truthfully.
Bobbi nodded. “Would you like some water?” She already made a move to get up, but Daisy quickly squeezed her hand, meaning for her to sit back down. Bobbi chuckled and did as ordered. “Okay, easy, I’m not going anywhere.” Daisy hesitated, before scraping her throat. “Water?”
Another chuckle erupted from Bobbi’s throat, but she got up, grabbed a water bottle and handed it to Daisy, all without letting go of her hand. Daisy took a few sips, sighing when the cool water hit her throat. She handed the bottle back and Bobbi put it down next to the chair.
They looked at each other in silence. Daisy eventually looked down at the, starting to pick at the blankets with her other hand, ignoring how the IV pulled at her skin. “I didn’t know you were here. In New York, I mean.”
“Would you have come to New York if you’d known?” Bobbi asked, honestly curious.
Daisy hesitated. “I don’t know. I missed you,” she said honestly, “But I was trying to avoid people.” She shrugged, wincing slightly at her own movement.
Bobbi squeezed her hand. “That’s okay. I was too.”
“So, you came here? To Stark?”
“I came to New York for Natasha, actually. She was the only one I knew how to trust that I wouldn’t be putting in danger,” she explained.
“And Hunter?” Daisy asked, although she could guess the answer. She felt Bobbi hesitate and look away. “He wanted more than I did, but he didn’t want to continue this work. We fought. He left,” she summarized what was probably a month of screaming and crying. Daisy didn’t respond.
“What is the damage?” she asked instead. Bobbi sighed. “Bullet wound to your thigh. Me and Nat got it out, but it’ll take a while to heal. Loads of fractures in your arms, extensive bruising on your ribs. And you lost so much blood. I think you’re almost back on the normal amount of blood, but you’ve been hooked on the IV for a day and a half. But you don’t really care, do you?”
Daisy didn’t say anything, and Bobbi leaned forward to catch her eyes. “Daisy. Were you… were you trying to die?”
Daisy saw how much it cost for Bobbi to ask the question. “No,” she answered. And she hadn’t been. Just… “Not actively.”
She could almost feel the sadness radiating of Bobbi then, and looked away, not wanting to see the pity she just knew was in her eyes. She didn’t pull her hand away though. Bobbi’s touch was grounding her. She chose to ignore why that was for now.
“Do you love Lincoln? Do you think it was your fault?”
Daisy’s head shot back, searching Bobbi’s eyes for the pity she had expected, instead finding guilt, and hurt. “He loved me,” she said eventually. “And he died. Isn’t that enough? Isn’t that too much already?”
Her heart hurt thinking about it. About his last words. About his declaration of love, cut short by an explosion that should have killed her, not him. She should have died, not him. Since Bobbi left, she didn’t feel like living anymore anyways. It didn’t seem fair that she got to live in a life where everyone she loved died, where everyone that loved her left, while the man who had so much love to give died for someone who couldn’t even love him back. Not like that, at least.
A tear rolled down her cheek, but she didn’t notice it until Bobbi carefully brushed it away with her thumb. “I’m sorry,” the blonde said.
Daisy’s eyes followed Bobbi’s hand back to her lap. “How did you even know?” she asked numbly. Bobbi smiled apologetically. “May called Nat, who told me.”
“So, you know about Hive then?”
“Yes.”
“And you know that I hurt Fitz? That I almost killed Mack? That Andrew died for me? That I brought down the base on top of everyone? That I nearly destroyed my family? And that I...” she swallowed thickly, “And that I begged for him to take me back because that would hurt less than facing my mistakes? That I got Lincoln killed?”
A beat of silence. “Yes.”
Daisy shook her head. “And you still came for me?” she asked incredulously.
Bobbi looked at her with unwavering eyes. “Of course. You called.”
More tears fell down Daisy’s cheeks. Bobbi inched closer. “Scoot over,” she commanded. Daisy brushed away her tears and scooted over as best as she could with her arms in casts and hooked onto an IV and an injured leg and Bobbi’s hand in hers because she sure as hell wasn’t letting go. Bobbi climbed into the bed behind her and ever so carefully pulled Daisy against her chest.
She held Daisy like she would break, like she was fragile, a porcelain plate balancing on the edge of a table. Daisy felt two strong arms wrap around her waist, and relaxed into the embrace, tucking her head under Bobbi’s chin.
Her whole life, she’d had to be strong. She’d had to pretend that the bruises on her arms where nothing after her foster parents gave her another beating. She’d had to pretend that it didn’t really hurt that much after one of her foster brothers pushed her down the stairs. She’d had to be strong when she ran away and started living in a van. She’d had to be strong when she joined the team, almost died, got betrayed, and almost lost her two best friends. She’d had to be strong when her whole life got turned upside down because of alien shit and her parents trying to kill her first and then dying and getting memory wiped. She’d had to be strong for Fitz when Jemma was gone, she’d had to be strong for Coulson and May, she’d had to be strong for Mack and her team, for everyone. Everyone except for Bobbi. Bobbi, who always stayed, even when she was crying in her arms, even when her powers lashed out and ripped the gym apart and everyone else had fled. She could be just Daisy with Bobbi. She didn’t have to be strong, as long as Bobbi was holding her.
So, she closed her eyes, curling into Bobbi as much as possible, taking comfort in the soft reassurances the tall woman whispered in her ear. She was safe.
///
Bobbi acknowledged Natasha with a nod when the redhead walked in, not looking away from Daisy’s sleeping form in her arms. Natasha raised an eyebrow. “She woke up already? Or did you just climb in with her?”
“She woke up. Inhuman healing, remember?” Bobbi responded, somewhat distracted by Daisy shifting at the sounds. She tightened her embrace and the girl settled again. Bobbi smiled faintly and looked up to meet Natasha’s eyes. She could almost swear the superspy looked amused.
“Not a word.”
Natasha raised her hands in defence, before taking a seat in Bobbi’s old chair. “How is she?”
Bobbi hummed. “She doesn’t actively want to die, but she wouldn’t really mind it either, I think.”
Natasha nodded, and Bobbi continued. “She was brainwashed, Nat. She hurt her family and loved him for it, and when she came out of it her best friend, who was also in love with her, died. She’s a mess.”
“She sounds like me,” Natasha quipped. Bobbi frowned, and Natasha rolled her eyes. “Come on, Bob. Killing or hurting someone under a bad guy’s influence and loving him for it. Does it ring any bells?”
Bobbi’s eyes widened. “Shit. Of course. I’m so sorry, I…”
“It’s okay,” Natasha interrupted her. “Maybe I can help her,” she added, looking at Daisy’s small form.
“You would do that?”
“Nobody deserves to go through that,” Natasha just said in a soft voice.
Daisy stirred, immediately capturing Bobbi’s attention. “Good morning, rockstar.” Daisy yawned, adorably in Bobbi’s opinion but she would never admit it, before opening her eyes. “Hi,” she whispered. Then she looked to her side, where Natasha was watching her with kind eyes. “Hi,” she said a little louder. “Agent Romanoff?”
“Just Natasha is fine,” the spy replied. “Daisy Johnson, right?” Daisy nodded. “Thank you. For patching me up and stuff. You didn’t have to, although I think Bobbi would have been mad if you hadn’t.” Natasha laughed, something Daisy hadn’t expected. “I can see why May liked you, Johnson.”
Daisy perked up. “Bobbi said you know May. Or, well, she called you, so you must know her.”
“She was my SO.”
“Mine too.”
“Mine too,” Bobbi jumped in. “For a while then. After her I got some HYDRA idiot.” Daisy gave her a look. “My other SO was Ward. I think I win.”
Natasha looked between them. “My SO’s before May were Dreykov and Madame from the Red Room,” she drily commented. Daisy looked her up and down before shrugging. “You win then, I suppose.” Bobbi chuckled. “Natasha always wins.”
Natasha nodded, a glint of competitivity in her eyes that easily matched Daisy’s. “I do.”
“I challenge you to a game of Mario Kart,” Daisy said thoughtfully. “Let’s see who wins that.” Bobbi groaned. “Nat, please don’t…”
“You are so in.”
///
Daisy was lying on the couch, her leg supported on a cushion and her head in Bobbi’s lap. Bobbi was reading a book with one hand, the other idly playing with her hair. Bobbi had told her she like the new haircut on her second day in the tower. Daisy’s stomach twisted when she remembered the look in Bobbi’s eyes as she said it.
She squirmed on the couch, suddenly uncomfortable in her position. Bobbi stopped her movements and lifted her book to look at her. “What are you doing?”
Daisy huffed, twisting around and eventually giving up and sitting up. “I don’t know. I want out.”
Bobbi smiled kindly at her. “Where would you want to go?” Daisy shrugged, standing up, grabbing her crutches, and moving to the kitchen for a glass of water. Natasha had her drinking two litres of water every day and got all annoying when she didn’t drink. Food was a different story though, but she was trying. Tony had been making smoothies for her with enough nutrients. He claimed he survived on them too, and Daisy appreciated his effort.
He'd been nothing but nice to her, despite her hacking him repeatedly and also stealing money from him and taking up space and time and more money. He’d even retrieved her van with the limited personal belongings she possessed. She felt guilty, but Tony had waved away her concerns, insisting it was fine, as long as she helped him improve his security again. Daisy had agreed but kept to herself with Bobbi in her rooms most of the time anyways. Natasha stopped by from time to time. They talked. Daisy thought the spy was a better therapist than every other therapist she’d ever had combined.
“I don’t know,” she repeated as an answer to Bobbi’s question. “But I’ve been stuck inside for two week. A stroll in the park would be fucking amazing already.”
Bobbi closed her book and got up from the couch. “Let’s do that then.” Daisy’s head swirled in her direction so fast she was surprised she didn’t get a whiplash. “What? Really?”
Bobbi had been a bit protective since finding her a week ago. Which was to be understood, because the blonde had found her in a puddle of her own blood, and she had basically told her she didn’t mind it very much if she died. She would be concerned as well. But it did mean that Daisy couldn’t really go anywhere because Bobbi thought it wasn’t safe just yet, and Natasha sided with Bobbi, and Tony’s opinion didn’t count. And now she just said they could go out?
“We can take a walk outside. Go to the park. Watch the dogs and the birds. You know, normal people stuff.” Bobbi shrugged. “As long as you take your crutches.”
If jumping didn’t still hurt like hell, Daisy would have been jumping up and down. Instead, she just beckoned Bobbi closer so she could give her a hug. Bobbi’s arms were strong around her waist and Daisy relaxed into the embrace. “Thank you.”
They quickly got ready for their walk, Bobbi telling Friday to let the others know where they went. They walked to a nearby park, Daisy enjoying the feeling of fresh air against her cheeks as she hopped after her friend. Bobbi very thoughtfully shortened her strides so she could keep up, looking at Daisy as she smiled. “How have you been doing, Daisy?” she asked suddenly.
Daisy risked a quick glance at her friend, knowing she didn’t mean physically. Physically, she was doing great. Her arms were healing quite fast, the casts were off now that Tony had designed new gauntlets for her that she could wear at night to speed up her healing process. Due to her Inhuman nature, her leg was healing faster than was normal, which she was really happy about. She could hobble around without crutches now, although it still hurt a lot sometimes. But, she was getting better.
Mentally, now that was something else. She had nightmares, quaking the room until Bobbi came in to wake her up and hold her. She would zone out from time to time, and she would feel a soft hand on her wrist, before realizing her knife was flat against her arm. She would be playing games with Tony or Natasha and suddenly fall quiet because she heard his voice in her head, telling her it was her fault. And it hadn’t really improved yet in the two weeks she’d been here.
On day four of her stay at the tower, Natasha had found her in the bathroom, awkwardly curled up next to the toilet, blood on the tiles and a metallic smell in the air. The spy hadn’t uttered a word, just calmly cleaning and bandaging up her arms, rubbing her back as she threw out what little food was in her stomach, and helping her back to bed. The next morning Natasha had been sitting by her bedside, filling out some reports. Before she could utter a word, Natasha had looked her dead in the eye. “We’re going to talk. Every day, for thirty minutes, more if you want, but thirty is the minimum. Just talk about whatever is going on in your head at that moment.” It hadn’t been an offer so much as an order. Daisy just nodded. A timer was set, and then she was talking. She felt lighter than she had in months when the timer went off.
“Daisy?”
Daisy shook herself from her thoughts, her arms burning under their bandages. “What? Oh, yeah.” She remembered Bobbi asking her a question. “It’s… I’m getting better, I think. Leaving SHIELD helped, but self-medication didn’t. You help too. But it’s… It’s still hard. I’m tired, Bobbi. I don’t want to die, but I’m still not convinced I want to live either.”
It was raw honesty, but she knew if she lied, Bobbi would know, and then she’d be disappointed. Anyways, Daisy had never had a problem with being honest to Bobbi.
They crossed the road and walked into the park. Bobbi led them to an empty in the sun and sat down. Daisy sat her crutches against the bench before sitting down next to Bobbi with a heavy sigh. She leaned her head against her friend’s shoulder, smiling happily when she felt an arm wrap around her shoulders.
“I’m proud of you, you know that?”
Daisy stilled. “Why?”
“Why not? You’ve seen so much, Dais, and you’re still going. And, and maybe it’s not always easy, and you’re not always happy, but you’re still trying. How could I not be proud of you when despite everything, you’re still trying?” Bobbi explained. Daisy closed her eyes.
“But I’m tired, Bob. Tired of trying and failing. Tired of trying and losing. Does it… Does it ever stop? Does it get better?” she asked, her voice small. Bobbi turned her head, placing a kiss on the top of her head and tightening her arm around Daisy. “I can’t promise you that, rockstar. But I can promise you I’m here for whenever you’re tired and you want to rest for a bit. And I’ll tell you that it’s okay, that you can close your eyes for a while. And I’ll be right here by your side when you wake up.”
///
Daisy was still leaning against her shoulder, basking in the sunlight she so rarely got with her eyes closed, when Bobbi heard a familiar voice call her name. She looked up and saw Peter approaching, dragging a boy behind him and a girl slowly following them. He stopped in front of them, waving awkwardly. “Hi, Bobbi.”
“Hey, kid,” she replied easily. “Who are your friends?” Peter shoved the boy in front of him. “This is Ned,” he said. He pointed over his shoulder to the girl. “And that is MJ.”
Ned stared at her; awe written all over his face. She felt Daisy shake silently against her and realised her friend was laughing. She poked her, and Daisy sat up with a huff. “I’m Bobbi, and this is Daisy,” she told the kids. Ned nodded dumbly, and MJ ignored her, staring at Daisy. Daisy tensed up for a second, before relaxing, with a lazy smile on her face. “Hey, kid.”
MJ frowned. “You’ve looked better. And you’ve changed your name.” Daisy nodded, not offering any explanation. Bobbi poked her again. “You know her?”
“Orphanage,” they said in sync. “Although, she ran away before I got into a decent house,” MJ added. Daisy tipped her head, her eyes apologetic. “I would have taken you after I got some money, but ehm, aliens happened.”
“You mean the Chitauri invasion?” Peter asked. Daisy gave him half a shrug. “Amongst other things with aliens, yeah.” Bobbi poked her again, and Daisy snapped. “Will you stop doing that?”
Bobbi pouted at her tone. “Sorry? But you’re about to talk about things you should not be talking about.” Daisy huffed but leaned into Bobbi again all the same. Bobbi shook her head and addressed Peter. “So, what are you kids doing here?”
Peter not so subtly nudged Ned by jamming an elbow in his ribs, and the other boy finally perked up. “Oh, we were just brainstorming about a project we wanted to do together, something sciency, but we wanted to include politics, and then Peter said it’s a good idea to take a walk because it clears your head and then we bumped into you guys, and Peter says he knows you from SI. Do you know Iron Man?”
MJ facepalmed behind him and Bobbi laughed. “I do. I live in his house.” Daisy mumbled something, but Ned was already excitedly jumping around. “Is he really so smart as Peter says?” Bobbi nodded. “Probably, yeah. But Natasha is better company. Tony gets grumpy without coffee.”
This caught MJ’s attention. “You know the Black Widow?” Bobbi smiled and nodded again. MJ’s eyes started to shine. “She’s so badass. Could you…” she chanced a look at the boys, but they were distracted. “Could you get me an autograph?”
Daisy looked up at her. “We could. I should warn you though, she is much less scary in real life. She reads books curled up on the sofa and prefers tea over coffee.”
“Peter says she’s scary. She’s a war criminal,” MJ stated with a disbelieving look.
“Who you want the autograph from,” Daisy countered.
“She’s a cool war criminal.”
“And a softie,” Daisy insisted.
Bobbi nodded. “I have to agree with Dee. She’s a real softie. I’ll make sure you get her autograph though. I don’t think she’d mind.”
Bobbi’s ringing phone interrupted them. She apologized to the kids and took it out, accepting the call with a quick glance at the caller ID. “Morse speaking. What’s up?”
She ignored the boys exchanging excited looks and focussed on the call.
“Morse. I have to leave the tower. Better get your ass down here if you want to say goodbye.”
“What? We’re on our way. Give us fifteen.”
She hung up and put her phone away. Daisy gave her a questioning look, but Bobbi shook her head. “We have to go.”
Peter gave her a concerned look. “Is everything okay?” he asked. Bobbi hesitated. “You better come with us,” she decided. His eyes darkened, but he nodded, helping Daisy up and handing her her crutches. She nodded her thanks and waved at Ned and MJ. “Nice meeting you, kiddos,” she said. She turned to MJ. “I’m happy you found a decent family. Take care.”
MJ nodded. Bobbi and Daisy started walking away, while Peter quickly talked to Ned about something, before bouncing after them. When they were out of earshot from the others, he asked again. “What’s going on?”
Bobbi sighed. “Nat’s leaving.”
///
Daisy practically barged into Natasha’s room, ignoring the stabs of pain in her leg, knowing Friday had already warned the spy anyway. “You’re leaving?” she said, almost accusingly.
Natasha looked up from where she was packing a duffle bag. “Not voluntarily. But yeah. I’m heading to Norway; it’s supposed to be nice.” It sounded cheerily, but Daisy heard the exhaustion in her voice. “Can I come? Me and Bobbi?” she burst out.
Natasha raised an eyebrow at her, and she shuffled awkwardly on her feet. “I mean, we could come with you. Keep you company.”
“You want to join a war criminal on the run? I though you tried that already?”
Daisy ignored the jest. “You’re not a war criminal.”
Natasha scoffed, resuming her packing. “The government argues differently,” she mumbled.
Daisy looked at her pack for a few moments longer, before making a decision. She hobbled over, well aware that Natasha could punch her if she wished to, but she could not care less. She wrapped her arms around the spy from behind. Natasha tensed, but then relaxed. “This is…”
“Unexpected? Kinda nice? Unlike me?” Daisy filled in for her. Natasha nodded. “Yes,” she said with a small smile. Daisy shrugged, not letting go just yet. “I’ll have you know I was a very huggy person before I got brainwashed.”
Natasha laughed. “You wouldn’t say.” Daisy released her, frowning at her when she turned around with a glint in her eyes. “What is that supposed to mean?”
Natasha rolled her eyes. “Come on. You and Bobbi? Neither of you is very subtle. You’re all cuddly around her while looking ready to murder anyone else that comes too close.” Daisy looked away, grumbling something under her breath, and Natasha grinned. She tapped Daisy’s arms, turning serious again. “I’ll call you every day, kid. We’re still gonna talk.”
Daisy’s eyes lit up a bit. “That’s good. I… I like our talks. It helps.”
“That’s good to hear, kid. Now, how about you go down and make me a coffee for on the road. I’ll finish this and be up in a minute, okay.”
Daisy nodded and left. She took the elevator, not being able to take the stairs, and waited impatiently for it to reach the right floor. She hobbled out as soon as it opened, not paying any mind to the others. She busied herself with making Nat’s coffee, her hands shaking as she poured it into a thermos. She hissed when she spilled some over her own hand.
She put down the coffee pot, just looking at the bright red spot appearing on her hand. She felt a steady presence come up behind her, guiding her to the tap and holding her hand under the cold water for a while. She didn’t look Bobbi in the eye as the water cooled her hand. Her vibrations alerted her that Natasha had arrived in the kitchen.
“What happened?” she asked. Daisy shrugged. “Spilled,” she muttered.
“I’m not even gone and everything’s already going to shit again,” the spy joked, but it fell oddly flat. Daisy shook her head and took the thermos. She hobbled over to Natasha and handed her the thermos. “Here you go,” she said without really looking at her.
It was weird. She had only been here two weeks. But in those two week, Natasha had saved her life with Bobbi, made sure she was drinking and being healthy, patched her up after finding her on the bathroom floor and talked to her. She liked Natasha. Natasha was kind, and good, and safe. And now she was leaving. Before she was even properly in Daisy’s life, she was leaving again. Just like everybody else.
It shouldn’t bother her so much; it had only been two weeks. But it bothered her. And it bothered her that it bothered her. Safe to say, Daisy was confused, frustrated. Tired too, from all of it. She stepped back, away from Natasha, into Bobbi, who gently caught her, stabilised her, as she always did. Natasha hesitated, before saying goodbye to Tony and Peter first, who left for the labs when they were done. Natasha turned back to Bobbi and Daisy, who hadn’t moved.
“I’m sorry,” she started, but Daisy shook her head. “It’s not your fault. It’s just my head being stupid.” Natasha shook her head but didn’t respond. She looked at Bobbi. “I’m sorry,” she repeated. Bobbi smiled at her. “It’s okay.” It wasn’t. Not at all. Not even a little bit. But hey.
“Thank you for taking me in, Nat. I don’t know what I would have done without you,” Bobbi said honestly. Natasha scoffed. “Something stupid, probably.”
Bobbi chuckled quietly. “Probably,” she agreed. “So, thank you.”
“Of course.”
Natasha hesitated. Natasha never hesitated. But then she pulled a note out of her pocket and handed it to Daisy. Daisy took it, looked at it, looked at Natasha, then back at the note. “Is this…”
“The address of my place in Norway, yeah. If your leg is fully healed and you still want to come say hello, or keep me company, you can. Please call ahead though, so I can dismantle all the boobytraps,” Natasha added.
Daisy nodded, ignoring the familiar pang in her heart that came with saying goodbye. “Thank you.”
Natasha nodded, gave them one last smile, and turned around and walked away, out of the tower, out of their lives. For now, at least.
Daisy pocketed the note and buried her face in Bobbi’s shoulder. Bobbi wrapped her arms around Daisy. “You okay?”
Daisy shook her head. “She left. I know I’m not losing her, and that it’s not her fault, but she left. It hurts.” Bobbi hugged her tighter. “It’s okay. She’ll call every day, remember?”
Daisy nodded against Bobbi’s shoulder. She looked slightly up at Bobbi, her nose brushing the taller woman’s cheek. “You can’t leave, you hear me? Promise me you’re not going to die, or leave, or anything that causes you to not be here? Promise me, even if you don’t keep it.”
Bobbi looked down, her eyes burning with something that should scare Daisy, but strangely enough just settled her. “I promise you,” she started, her hand coming up to cup Daisy’s cheek, “I’m here with you. I’m not going anywhere.”
Daisy’s eyes dropped to Bobbi’s lips, back up to her eyes, nodding at the silent question in Bobbi’s eyes. The blonde leaned down and connected their lips, and Daisy felt herself melt into strong arms. She wrapped her arms around Bobbi’s neck, pulling her down and close so she didn’t have to stand on her tiptoes. That shit still hurt.
It didn’t look like Bobbi minded, obedient as she was leaning down. When Daisy felt the need for oxygen become too strong, she reluctantly pulled back, smiling against Bobbi’s lips as they followed her momentarily. “I need to breath, Bobbi dear,” she said teasingly.
Bobbi rolled her eyes, not giving her more space than absolutely necessary. “Breathing is overrated.”
“Now, when I say that, it’s self-destructive. But when you say it, it’s funny. That doesn’t seem fair.” Daisy pouted up at her, eliciting a chuckle from the taller woman. “Whatever you say, rockstar,” she said lovingly.
Daisy leaned her head against Bobbi’s chest, happy to stay in her safe embrace forever. Apparently, Bobbi agreed with her thoughts on the matter, just pressing soft kisses on the top of her head. “You want to watch a movie and cuddle?” she asked softly. Daisy hummed but didn’t move. She felt a laugh rumble in Bobbi’s chest. “You do have to move for that, sweetheart. I’m not gonna carry you.”
Images of Bobbi lifting her up in slightly different settings flashed in her mind, and she abruptly pulled away, taking Bobbi’s hand, and dragging her towards the elevator, ignoring the bright laugh behind her.
Bobbi held her during the elevator ride, and Daisy noticed she wasn’t as tense as she normally was in the tight space. Once the doors opened, they were quick to get out, Daisy dropping on the couch as Bobbi shook her head in amusement. The blonde walked over to the mini-fridge and came back with two bottles of water. She looked at Daisy sprawled out over the couch for a moment. “And where am I sitting?” she asked with an amused smile.
Daisy debated pointing at her lap but refrained from doing so. Barely. And by the roll of Bobbi’s eyes, she knew the other woman was thinking the same thing. She smirked and scooted over a bit, making space for Bobbi behind her. Obediently, Bobbi sat down, opening her arms so Daisy could cuddle into her. Daisy happily followed along.
“Friday, put on A New Hope, please,” Bobbi said in the direction of the massive TV screen. Daisy looked over her shoulder at Bobbi. “Star Wars, really?”
The theme sounded before Bobbi could answer, and she just grinned, her attention already on the movie. Daisy shook her head with soft chuckle and turned back to watch the movie. And if she grew tired halfway through the movie and closed her eyes, well. Bobbi just pulled her close, pressing a kiss to her temple. ‘You can close your eyes, rockstar. I’m not going anywhere.”