Chapter 1: Then it hit me!
One day Jschlatt was minding his own business and sitting in his office, drunk as always. He was rich beyond compare but he kinda didn’t remember why... He thought he ran a company of some sort but didn’t know what they did. But it didn't matter because he was rich.
But right now Jschlatt was very very very sad. And he didn’t know why. His life had simply become… dull. He found no joy anymore in terrorizing homeless people, fighting with his ugly fucking wife Minx, or even drop kicking babies! Like come on he always had fun punting those puny little fuckers!
At first he thought maybe he should try to be a good person so he called in his secretary hatsune miku and told her to donate $10 million to like an orphanage or something. She nodded and gave a random charity money. See, Jschlatt thought to himself, I did something good.
Jschlatt smiled sitting in his big office chair for 3 seconds then immediately changed his mind. This fucking sucked, being nice was ass. He called again for his assistant Hatsune Miku and told her to pay someone $100 million to take the biggest riding lawn mower and go crush all the orphanages in the world. Jschlatt then felt a bit better but still very sad.
Jschlatt even stooped to the level of trying to have a nice dinner with his wife Minx. He got reservations at Chuck E cheeses which was where they met!! How romantic, right but as the Irish woman sat before him and asked with much conviction in her voice “what the hell do you want?” The smile melted from Jschlatt's very handsome face. They then proceeded to fight and cuss each other out which led to them making out on the table. The manager kicked them out for inappropriate public displays and they went home and hate fucked. But even after Jschlatt lay on the ground still tied up with a ball gag in his mouth he felt sad and empty.Was this all that was left of his life? Would he never again find joy in being a rich capitalist asshole. But then he came into Jschlatt’s life.
Jschlatt had been hit. No literally, Jschlatt got hit by a bus when he first saw the love of his life. The man who gave his dull existence a new meaning.
One day Jschlatt was walking in the city of New York like a fucking peasant. He was so deep in his sadness that he was in fact walking across the street and not paying attention listen to emo music by bands like my chemical romance. All the sudden BOOM!
Jschlatt got absolutely clobbered by the bus but luckily it didn’t squish him like a pancake but instead threw him up into the air.
“Hey! Wake up!” Was what Jschlatt heard faintly like he was under water as he slowly drifted back into consciousness letting out a groan. “Wake up!”
schlatt opened his eyes wide, seeing some sort of bald blue guy with red eye outline thingies and a group of people all looking down at him lying on the cold road. All Jschlatt could muster to say in his hazed half conscious state was “What the fuck-“
“You got hit by a bus” The bald blue guy said in a deep sexy voice, Jschlatt may be fully alert at the moment but he always got hard at a sexy voice, he had no clue what he was talking about but he liked the voice.“What??” Jschlatt frowned, confused. The crowd around him slowly walked away, losing interest since he did wake up.
“You got hit by a bus” blue baldy repeated “your lucky to be alive.”
God what a sexy voice, was all Jschlatt could think as the blue bald guy leaned over him. Jschlatt looked down and noted at his physical appearance.
Damnnnnnnn
The stranger was probably wearing some kind of latex suit that to say was extremely tight would be an understatement. It pressed against his extremely muscular body and slim waist in a way that made Schlatt start salivating. He didn’t know if he wanted to be him or be fucked by him.not to mention that his shoulder to waist ratio was fucking insane. Those arms thick as tree trucks crossed over his broad chest could easily break schlatts spine. And that V line sure showed that he had a thick-
“Are you okay??” The man interrupts Jschlatts thoughts clearly worried about his conditions.
Schlagg shrugs “eh I feel ok.”
“Really…?” The beefy masked man asks his weird ass eyes thingys squinting “I mean you got him by a bus”
“Never better” Jschlatt smirks at the man and bites his lip “wow what’s your name?”
All Jschlatt can do is look up at him as the super hero dramatically takes off his mask and it takes all restraint in his body not to jump up and start kissing his huge luscious kardashian level lips. He has a perfect face with cheekbones higher than a heroin addict. Soft brown eyes that would make a proud boy's knees shake. “My name,” the man replies dramatically, “is Miguel O Hará ."