"Big man in a suit of armor. Take that off, what are you?"
Oh? Oh?
Tony finally understood what about him made the Super Solider tick.
Tony made him nervous—or rather, Tony made him insecure about himself. He didn't understand Tony or anything about the future, and Tony represented all of that. Tony was a reminder that everything he’d ever known was gone.
A man out of time and a man ahead of his time were never going to get along. With a quick glance at Romanov and Fury, they knew it too. In fact, Tony was willing to bet his entire fortune that they were hoping for that exact thing. Maybe they wanted to play on his daddy issues with Howard. Faced with what his father believed was the greatest creation since sliced bread, Tony wondered if they felt he’d want to bend over and let Rogers fuck him raw just to feel a little closer to his father’s ideal person.
Tony wasn’t about to let Shield think they got away with this one. He’d been entertaining them enough. Allowing Romanov to analyze him and allowing her to stay within his company, he even allowed Coulson to threaten him. He played their games long enough.
“Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist.”
"I know men with none of that worth ten of you."
Tony tilted his head as he studied Rogers. He still couldn’t understand what his father saw in the man—other than his misplaced sense of righteousness. So for a long moment, all Tony could do was stare. Tony was used to being judged based on what he had that others didn’t. He was used to being the scapegoat for the media and the general public, but at least they had genuine instances of Tony seemingly being an asshole for no reason to back up their claims. Tony was still trying to figure out what a man who’d been frozen for 70 decades could possibly have against him. The thought of Rogers having a grudge against him was so hilarious that he’d begun to laugh.”
Steve’s eyes widened in response, and his nose flared in indignation. When Fury and Natasha told him that Stark was self-serving, Steve didn’t want to believe that any child of Howard could be like that. Howard was a hero; he was someone who believed in Steve along with Peggy and Bucky, but watching that video of the Senate and reading all the news regarding Tony and his alcoholic tendencies made Steve wary. Finally meeting the man only solidified what he was told.
Taking a step forward, Steve got in Tony’s face. “You think this is funny?”
"Yeah," Tony conceded for a minute, and once he saw Roger's shoulders tense up further, he continued.
"But they're all dead, aren't they?"
Tony chuckled at the way Rogers sputtered, giving a glance at Bruce as he choked on a gasp.
"Excuse me?!"
Tony righted his head as he shrugged and patted Roger's arm as if he were consoling him, and he didn't just shatter his entire world.
"I only imagine you meant my father, Dr. Erskine, or maybe your buddy Barnes, right? Erskine is dead. My father is dead, and Barnes... well, he’s surely dead with him falling off a train and all that,” Tony said as he ticked off the names with his fingers. The room was shocked at his words, but Tony paid them no mind. His eyes were trained on Roger’s face. “I highly doubt you know Fury or Coulson enough to form an opinion on whether or not they’re worth ten of me, but I think you do anyway."
Tony sighed and shook his head, moving towards the door to get away from Rogers, lest he lose his cool.
"Now, here's the kicker, buddy. Fury and Coulson and the entirety of Shield want everything I have,” Tony said as he pointed toward Fury and Natasha.
“They want my money, they want my connections, they want my tech, they want my intelligence. The only thing they don't want personally is my fame because they want to keep doing their dirty business in the dark. They do, however, want my fame so I can bury said dirty business in the glory of my "ego."
Tony moved his fingers in a quote-in-quote motion as he rolled his eyes. For all that Natasha wrote that Tony Stark wasn’t recommended, they sure as hell wanted everything Tony Stark had to offer, or rather, they felt entitled to it.
"In fact," he continued. "I'm pretty sure they told you that was the reason I was important. Why you believe I'm not a hero correct?
At Steve's silence, Tony nodded and looked at him with an intensity that had his insides squirming. It reminded Steve of how everyone would look at him before the serum—when he was small and skinny. In that moment, Steve was transported to the times he had to have Bucky save him from getting beat up in alleyways by people who looked down on him because he was small. Even now, despite the fact that he towered over Stark, despite his muscle mass, Stark managed to make him feel small with just a glance.
Tony sighed and shook his head as if he were disappointed, and something about that made Steve's stomach drop to the floor.
"Nonetheless, you'd be correct anyway. I'm not a hero; in fact, I've never claimed to be one. More importantly, though, I don't want to be one."
Tony looked at Steve and the room with a barely concealed look of disgust.
"Heroes are either self-promoted or given that title based on another's opinion. Heroes aren’t held to the same standard as other people. Heroes often forget their place in the world. Heroes tend to hide behind their deeds and act like it will absolve them of any wrongdoing. Heroes aren’t what the world needs. They're just what people want. They're used as an escape from reality, from the harsh truths that justice and peace often come at a price, and I would know about the peace one since I helped America's version of peace practically destroy the Middle East."
Throughout Tony's speech, the room had gone deathly quiet, but Steve swore he could hear the pounding heartbeats of everyone in the room. From the corner of his eyes, he saw the uneasy glances that Fury and Natasha shared and how they tried to smooth out their expressions with little success. With every word Stark spoke, it felt like little knives were embedding themselves in his gut.
"Heroes don't exist, Rogers. Heroes are a fantasy and a fallacy rolled up into a neat little package.” Tony chuckled a little bit as he placed his hands inside his pockets and rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet.
“For instance,” he said. “People call the police and the military heroes, but they choose to do that, and it became a part of their jobs. Is it really heroic to keep your country safe? Is it really heroic for the police to do their jobs?"
Tony shrugged and tilted his side to the side. A smirk played on his lips, and Steve wanted nothing more than to wipe it off, but he couldn’t make his lips move or compel the words to come to his mouth.
Tony shook his head. "I don't think so. Maybe not everyone can do that. Put their lives on the line, and it's respectable that the ones who can do. It's commendable, no doubt about it, but it’s not heroic. They aren't special; they aren't doing anything that thousands of others around the world aren't as well, and maybe that's callous of me to say, especially since my best friend is in the military, but luckily for us, he hates the notion of heroes as much as I do. He believes it's part of his responsibility to his country, but he doesn't think his own personal motivations make him a hero."
Tony moved away from the door and made his way towards the middle of the room. He stared at the scepter and watched as it glowed and pulsed. Tony narrowed his eyes briefly, but rather than point out the obvious manipulation play going on, he decided to keep talking. If the scepter wanted to act as a form of truth serum, he'd allow it just this once. Tony honestly believed no one else realized what the scepter was doing. Tony's curiosity was peaked but he was wary of everything the scepter could do. Tony decided to leave it for now, turning his attention back to the conversation.
"That's how we get to the crux of the problem,” Tony said.
“Heroes are defined by either individual or group platonic ideals, but does that actually mean they're heroes? If that was the case Rogers, anyone who helped anyone, anyone who’s ever stepped out of their comfort zone for another, anyone who strives to make the world a better place can be considered a hero, but they aren't. What they are when they do that is a good person and someone with decency. Being a good person doesn't make you a hero. Putting your life on the line for another doesn't make you a hero. Being in the military or the police doesn't make you a hero. It makes you a good person; it means that those people have an extraordinary sense of right and wrong and a high capacity for love and selflessness, and granted, not everyone has that. Not everyone can do that; not everyone has that capacity, but it doesn't make someone with that capacity a hero."
Steve shook his head at Tony's words. Heroes are people who do the right thing regardless of the risk to themselves. People who put their lives on the line are good people and heroes. Steve believed he was a hero because he fought even when he couldn't. He stood up for the little guys; he stood up to bullies. He fought in World War II. He fought the Red Skull. He fought against the Nazis. He was a hero, just like his father. No matter what Stark said.
"You're wrong," Steve croaked out, his voice gone dry while listening to Stark speak.
Tony ignored Steve's words as if he didn’t speak at all. As if his words didn’t matter as he came to stand in front of him again.
"Am I?"
Steeling himself, Steve pulled his body up and made sure he towered over Stark as he spoke. Stark was a bully, and Steve was going to stand up to him just as he did to those back in the 40s.
“I've seen the footage. The only thing you really fight for is yourself. You're not the guy to make the sacrifice play, to lay down on a wire and let the other guy crawl over you."
"I think I would just cut the wire,” Tony replied almost instantly, and Steve snorted.
“Always a way out,” Steve sneered. He knew now that Tony was no better than the men who were too scared to serve and chose to stay home at the factories or do some other job that prevented them from doing what was right. Stark was a coward.
Tony only scoffed at Steve’s words. “I have no need or want to make myself a martyr when I don't have to. If I can save others without sacrificing myself, why shouldn't I? Let's be honest, Rogers. Everything special about you came out of a bottle. Without it, you'd be an asthmatic twig with a high sense of self-importance and a self-imposed, self-inflated sense of heroism. You did what others were doing at the time, not counting those who got drafted rather than signing up themselves. You signed up to protect your country even when you couldn't protect yourself, and you may think that makes you a hero, but in reality, your situation is a bit different, isn't it?"
Frowning, Steve felt his heart stop at Stark’s question and a sick feeling that he knew where this was leading. "What do you mean?"
Tony shrugged as he had no care in the world, and really he didn't, but he knew Steve knew what he was talking about or alluding to, even if no one else did.
"You were a carrier, Rogers. Your mother died of TB, and you may not have gotten sick, but you carried that illness within your cells. You could have gotten your entire squad sick had they not gotten their vaccinations. You knew the real reason why the military refused your entry, didn't you?"
Steve couldn't answer that question. Instead, he clenched his hands together and formed the tightest fist he could. How Tony knew that was beyond him. He didn't think anyone knew. Besides, if he didn't join, if he didn't try, he wouldn't have become Captain America, and Red Skull would still be out there terrorizing innocent people. Steve took a risk despite knowing the dangers, and the world was better off for it. The serum ended up making him immune and killed off anything bad in his body, so the world was safe anyways.
Steve didn't notice the looks of horror from the rest of the room's occupants. He didn’t notice how Fury and Natasha distanced themselves from him or how Bruce narrowed his eyes at him, however Tony did. The only person who didn't do anything like that was Thor but Tony knew that was just because the man didn't know what TB was.
"Granted," Tony shrugged again. "The serum killed the TB in your cells, but what if it didn't?” He questioned, and Steve physically recoiled, as did everyone in the room. However, Tony wasn’t done—not even close.
“How many people would have gotten sick and died due to your insistence of being a hero? How many wouldn't have had the chance to serve their country and become the "heroes" you believe exist? The hero you believe you are?"
Tony smiled at Rogers then. A small smile that twisted his features into something mocking, one that made Steve feel more insignificant than he ever had before.
"In short, Rogers, at the end of the day, despite what you, Fury, or anyone else believes, heroes don't exist, and your ideal hero shouldn't exist. Oh, but don't worry buddy,” Tony said sarcastically, a mocking lilt to his voice.
“You'll convince yourself that everything I said was wrong; you'll find a way to justify your selfish actions, and you'll hide behind your undeserved reputation. You can very well do that, but you'll lose your humanity while you’re at it."
Tony lifted a hand and patted Rogers on his cheek once, then twice again.
"And when you do because you will—people like you always do—you'll fit right in with the rest of Shield. You'll finally be among the heroes you foolishly believe exist but shouldn’t.”