I'm not quite sure we'd fix it
Amethyst felt like she was losing herself.
Amethyst. She's Amethyst.
Not around Pearl though.
Pearl broke her promise. It wasn't only one time. Amethyst couldn't stand saying no.
The times were growing closer and closer together. Always at night. Pearl would meet Amethyst in a random part of her room almost every night, and look in her eyes, begging. She felt obligated too.
She does it by choice.
She can stop whenever she wants.
Honestly.
Maybe not.
“Amethyst?”
Goddamnit.
That stupid, pitiful voice. She looks over to Pearl. Amethyst is exhausted, Rose’s form is so difficult for someone like her, Small gems aren't supposed to hold that large of a form for so long.She nods and props herself up with a small groan.
Pearl said nothing.
The shift was a bit uneasy, the light flickered, and wavered but eventually she formed a purple-tinted Rose. Pearl sat down next to her and rested her head on her shoulder. Pearl likes to go on tangents. She would speak about what they did, how Stevens was doing, how the others were doing.
Like Amethyst wasn't there for any of it.
Like she was actually Rose.
“Stevens has been doing so well, Rose.” her voice cracked, sounding small and hurt. She swallows and composes herself. “He's a lot like you.”
He's a lot like ROSE.
“Really?...How so?” Rose speaks.
Amethyst has gotten pretty good at mimicking and replicating Rose’s monotone voice.
Pearl smiles, as she looks into nothing. “He's so..happy, and curious about the world. We aren't the best parents, but he's turning out..amazing. He has your courage, and strength.”
Rose nods, humming along and gently wrapping an arm around Pearl, whose trembling stopped and her sniffles grew quiet.
“We had a mission today. Stevens has been coming with us. He's…trying his best.” she let out a pity laugh. “Sometimes it's rather humorous. Except when it almost gets us killed. Today he-”
Amethyst tuned out. She was THERE, Pearl. She saw it. She fought with you guys. She, Amethyst. Was there.
All she heard was static. Dark blues surrounded her vision. She stared off into space, only mumbles of what Pearl is saying is heard. She was there for it. She remembers it. She's Not Rose!
A cough interrupted her, she blinked and forced a smile back down at Pearl, to show that she was listening.
Once Pearl was done rambling, and the two sat there, intertwined like they usually do. Pearl swallowed and nodded, getting up. She nodded towards Amethyst, and swiftly left her room.
Amethyst let out a sigh she's been holding, letting her form go back to normal. Her whole body shook, small tears pricked at her eyes, which she quickly wiped away. Everything hurts. Her body was so, so sore.
As she steadied her breath, she turned, wrapping her arms around her waist and hiding in her long, pearly white hair.
-
The next night, Amethyst was free. Pearl hasn't come into her room. The relief she felt was unreal. Her body still ached, but she managed to leave in the middle of the night to go to the kitchen, and get some food.
She dug into the fridge, before she heard humming from behind her. She turns to look and Pearls standing over Stevens bed, humming as she looks at him. Weirdo.
She just sighed and rummaged some more, picking random items and stuffing it under her arm.
Even though it's bad, she secretly yearned for Pearl to come up to her, talk to her. But she didn’t. She didn't need Amethyst. She needed Rose . And if that's what Amethyst has to do for Pearl to spend time with her, then so be it. She was finally wanted by someone. Finally needed.
Amethyst’s cheeks turned a deep purple as she looked back at Pearl before Going back to her room.