I want 'em all
Sam's feelings for Bucky were growing stronger every day.
He supposed it was normal, working, living, and basically spending his free time with the man, a man who seemed to become more comfortable in his own skin and had managed to build a new version of himself, far from the Winter Soldier and the weapon Hydra had turned him into.
Sam's problem wasn't falling in love with Bucky; Sam's problem was not knowing what Bucky truly felt for him. Because if Sam were 100% sure that Bucky didn't feel the same way, he could handle it, he could bury his unrequited love under layers of friendship and eventually move on, but he couldn't have that certainty.
There were times when Bucky showed him parts of himself or looked at him or smiled at him in such a special way that made him think he had a chance, but then he made no move or seemed content with the friendship they had, or he was charming with women, or flirt with Sarah (Bucky said he didn't, but, in Sam's opinion, he did) and Sam would go crazy not knowing what was going on in Barnes' mind.
It could be that the supposed signs that Bucky felt the same were just Sam seeing what he wanted to see; after all, it had always been said that Bucky was a "ladies' man," but on the other hand, that didn't mean he didn't like men too. It was the 30s-40s, Sam thought, it was normal for him to keep it a secret, right?
Sam wondered if he should stop waiting for the answer to come raining down from the sky and just do something about it. A part of him wished for it, but the other part was terrified of making things weird and awkward between them, and above all, of losing Bucky.
They had always had a feeling, a special connection, even when they didn't get along, and that connection had only grown stronger over time, and Sam didn't want to ruin it for anything in the world because it made him very happy. Of course, they still had their quarrels, their arguments, and their jokes; they were Sam and Bucky after all, but it couldn't be denied that their bonds were getting stronger and Sam wanted them to be even stronger.
He wanted the Bucky who was his friend, and the one who was his roommate, and the one who was his coworker, and the one who was his partner, and the one who was a disastrous cook, and the one who was like another uncle to Cass and AJ, and the one who was good at fighting, and the one who was good at fixing ships, and the one who was always willing to help, and the one who said things just to tease Sam, he wanted them all and even more, he wanted the Bucky who would be his boyfriend, the one he would kiss in the mornings and hug at night, he wanted the Bucky who wanted a future with him and who loved him like Sam loved him. He simply wanted his friend in all the versions of himself he was willing to give.
He could be happy with what they had, of course, having Bucky Barnes in his life, in whatever form, was a privilege, but he would never settle if he knew there was a chance to have more, so Sam was confused thinking about what to do, considering whether to tell Bucky how he felt about him or not.
Sadly, life decided for him. One day when he least expected it, Bucky told him that he had been offered to join a new team called the Thunderbolts and that he was going to accept. Sam tried to show himself happy for his friend, he really was happy for him, but sad for himself, still he knew that Bucky deserved to do what he wanted and make his own decisions, and Sam wouldn't be the one to stop him so he pushed those feelings down and supported Bucky.
Joining the new team meant that he could no longer be in Delacroix, which was another blow to Sam, Bucky said he would continue to pay his share and took everything from Sam to not yell at him that he didn't want his money, but him. He rejected the offer, Bucky insisted, and after much debate, they reached an agreement in which Bucky would continue to pay his share of the rent for 6 months.
Two days later, the man left, breaking both their hearts. Sam had wanted to ask him to stay, and Bucky had wanted him to, but Sam didn't speak, and Bucky left to live his new life, leaving Sam, the man who had wanted all facets of Bucky and had been left with hardly any, behind.