It started with the call at 3am while normally any problem someone has after midnight is between them and god. There’s a select few that go through one of them is the reason he keeps bail money on hand. Well.. one of them the other is a ex rich kid named Kate. The first is James Buchanan Barnes the guy whose ocean blue eyes have had him. Driving from Philly all the way back to Manhattan with take out. The man looks in his general direction and Clint is ready to comply. Whatever the brunette mishka wants he gets usually within reason. And if it was Nat or Yelena they would just bust the door down and be done with it.
No, this had been a hundred percent grade A pure authentic Barnes brand fuckery. He wasn’t even in trouble either Barnes is just an insomniac. Clint knew better than to decline the call because if left to his own devices. The ex assassin tends to overthink shit and by the time Clint would be conscious again. Buck would’ve needed an emergency therapy session and a week of self care.
By 5am Clint was main lining a large iced americano. With enough espresso shots in it to concern the poor McDonald’s worker. Two big breakfasts extra sausage and eggs because he’s a bottomless pit. And pure spite because he should be dead to the world right now. But instead Clint Hawkeye Barton was sent by Fury to check out a Hydra cell at the asscrack of dawn. And because he got robbed of his precious beauty sleep. Clint didn’t even take his bow, this is a job for the fuck you crossbow and the spite swords. Plus since no one specified the logistics of dead or alive. Clint decided to wholesale the entire cell no one was safe. Fury could, would and still is angry at him for it but serves the bald bastard right. Maybe next time he won’t get a priority call at 5am on a Friday before the sun is even up.
By 8am Clint was begrudgingly awake and midway through the Jefferson library mission in VTM Swansong. When Kate invited him to a Xbox party to get some dubs in SMITE. It devolved from there and by 10am Buck had joined the party with Yelena. Every two seconds in Halo Infinite he was being blown to hell by a rocket launcher. When he wasn’t being run over or sniped out of the air by Barnes. Who doesn’t know the meaning of the words slow down. (How does one ‘accidentally’ run you over in midair with a banshee.)
When noon finally showed up for work Clint had taken out his hearing aides. And hid in the linen closet on the R&D floor for a nap. He nearly shanked a bitch when he woke up to Parker a bare inch from his face. Apparently Lucky sold him out for a milkbone… which.. fair and besides who can be mad at Lucky. Maybe next time they won’t send the baby spider to wake up a dangerous and jumpy ex sniper.
At 3pm Buck decided it was Disney movie marathon time but really they just watched Alice in Wonderland on repeat. Because Buck loves the absurdity of it all especially Of Cabbages and King. For Christmas last year he’d shelled out to get the man an Alice in Wonderland Loungefly. Which he adores and carries around often to show it off. Also the rule of thumb is if Buck falls asleep on you you’re legally obligated to stay put. Until the man wakes up so Clint ended up with a dead arm until 7 but worth it.
When 10pm finally rolled around Clint not only took out his aides. But he turned off all of his phones and made Jarvis swear to not wake him up until noon tomorrow. Because and I quote ‘I’m one jump scare away from ending up on a watchlist.’