The Great Hall
Hermione sat quietly in the busy hall as her fellow Gryffindors chatted loudly. It was about 20 minutes into the sorting ceremony which meant people were starting to not pay attention and go back to their own worlds. Hermione always felt bad for the kids at the end of the alphabet; for the ones at the beginning, it always felt like their sorting held more gravity, with the whole hall being quiet and more people clapping them on as they made their ways to the respective table. But perhaps she was a bit hypocritical because even though she felt bad she couldn't bring herself to be interested in it either. Actually, she thought the whole thing was inefficient; I mean the UK is huge and they let hundreds and hundreds into Hogwarts each year, why make the whole school sit through an hour and a half of sorting instead of just doing it beforehand. She hated a lot of things about Hogwarts, and even more about attending. That being said she did pay attention to the ‘G’ names, a sort of homage to her first year self who felt wronged that no one seemed to care about her sorting.
“Gibson, Taylor”
“GRYFFINDOR”
“Govan, Dani”
“HUFFLEPUFF”
“Graham, Elliot”
“HUFFLEPUFF”
“Greengrass, Astoria”
At this name Hermione paused, and it seemed so did most of the Slytherin table. She didn’t know Daphne Greengrass had a younger sister. Then again, she supposed that she didn’t know much of anything about Daphne besides the fact that she was a prefect this year and that her family, which if not extremely powerful, was still pretty up there in terms of social status. But, then again, from the way the Slytherins had seemed to have gone quiet, all waiting on the edge of their seats, hungrily craving the hat’s reply, maybe she was underestimating the Greengrass status.
Finally after some moments the hat shouted “SLYTHERIN.”
Typical, she thought. Most siblings got sorted into the same houses anyways, whether that was because of their actual nature or because they asked the hat for it out of fear of being separated, Hermione didn’t know.
“Hermione, you have got to try this butter chicken!” Ron practically moaned from next to her. She turned to see the boys with messy faces, both inhaling their food. She laughed at the dramatics, despite being a bit disgusted too.
“Thereshiously ith’s sho good!" Harry said with a full mouth while pouring her a plate. Seriously, did the boys have no tact? Still, she accepted it gladly.
“Have you two compared your schedules already?” She asked while pulling her own out. Part of her was already dreading the coming year, the least she wanted was some classes with her friends.
“Yeah we did last weekend.” Harry said as he handed Hermione their schedules. “We got most of our classes together but were separated for transfiguration! That’s like one of the hardest ones” he pouted.
Truth be told, it stung a little that they already compared schedules without her. She knew they loved her and she loved them but sometimes Hermione got a little jealous of how Ron and Harry were closer. It’s not that she was jealous of either of them per se, but more of just, what they had. She wanted her own best friend, someone who was always her first choice and vice versa. Ron interrupted her pity party though as he inquired excitedly, “Soooo, what classes do we have?”
“We all have potions together! Thank god” a collective sigh escaped all of them. “And Defense against the dark arts. Harry I have transfiguration and charms with you and astronomy and herbology with Ron. ”
“God damn, of course Harry gets you for all the hard classes.” Ron groaned, theatrically covering his eyes
“Oh sod off, I’m not there so you can cheat off me the whole time.”
“It’s not cheating, It’s just accepting some help.” He tried to rationalize
“Mate it’s not accepting help, if you have to force the help.” Said Harry as he grinned slyly
“Yeah yeah whatever.”
The trio went on comparing their schedules with their other fellow classmates, when Hermione got to Neville however, Dumbledore interrupted for the yearly back to school speech. The sorting must have been over.
Despite the raucous nature of the students before, Dumbledore’s presence seemed to have a sort of unparalleled affect, bringing silence to the hall with just a clearing of his throat. Even Fred and George had to cease their antics.
“Hello all and welcome for another new year at our great institution!” Everyone broke into applause momentarily. “I hope the train ride was comfortable for all, and for the first years, after tonight's dinner your House Heads will show you to your respective commons while telling you all you’ll need to know about your school year, and your prefects to your dorms. Speaking of which, I would like to introduce our Heads and Prefects of this year. These students were picked carefully for their hard work and dedication to their academics and our school. For their exemplary behavior and their leadership skills. It was not an easy path for them, but they made the trek and wholeheartedly deserve their titles.” Again, some scattered clapping filled the room, mostly from the teachers this time.
Hermione smiled as she swelled with pride. She remembered her own first-year self who felt so scared and out of place at the school, but how she idolized the Gryffindor head students and prefects. They seemed so smart and amazing to her at the time and now she was in that position as Head girl. She hoped some first years would look at her the same way because honestly, and she didn’t want to seem arrogant, but Dumbledore was right about her deserving this.
“For Slytherin, I present to you Pansy Parkinson and Theodore Nott as heads and Daphne Greengrass and Tracey Davis for prefects!”
Loud cheers broke out from across the hall. As Hermione glanced from across the room, she found Malfoy looking like a kicked little puppy, much to her satisfaction, and Harry’s and Ron’s too. Nott and Greengrass seemed to be relishing in the attention, even urging on more cheers. Pansy looked proud but was handling it more humbly, and Davis was blushing sheepishly as if she didn’t really know how to handle the spotlight. Without meaning too, Hermione caught Daphne's eye, making her smile falter for a moment. She blushed embarrassingly but was too prideful to look away, it felt like admitting defeat, even if that something was non-existent and one sided. Whatever it was that made her smile falter, Daphne recovered from it quickly as she flashed a small grin to the Gryffindor, or was it a smile? Hermione was too far away and confused to tell. But despite their distance, and their history of minimal interaction, Hermione could still tell that whatever it was, it was only meant for her. And she didn’t ever think about it before, but Daphne had a nice smile. (or grin).
“For Hufflepuff, I present to you Cedric Diggory and Hannah Abbott as your heads and Ernie Macmillan and Susan Bones as prefects!”
Again, cheers broke out from the respective table, but also from more girls all around the hall this time, no doubt for Cedric. Hermione rolled her eyes but even though she would like to say she didn’t get it, even she could see how hot Cedric was. And Ginny definitely agreed, because upon hearing about Cedric’s title, she glanced at Hermione and they both nodded wordlessly, eyebrows raised, indicating they were definitely both thinking the same thing and it was definitely about Cedric.
Ron definitely did not agree. “I don’t get why everyone has to fawn over him, like he’s not even that special” he grumbled
“Of course you wouldn’t get it Ron, Cedric’s a gentleman” Ginny retorted
“Yeah mate and you have to admit he’s brilliant at quidditch and really good looking too.” Harry conceded, much to Ron’s disappointment. He didn’t give up though.
“Well Mione what’d you think?” He asked, but more curiously than Hermione expected. She felt her face turn red and started stuttering.
“I well - you know I- I-” It’s not like she fancied Cedric or anything but it was still awkward to talk about boys she was attracted to with, well, the boys. Luckily she was saved by Dumbledore’s next announcement.
“For Ravenclaw, I present Cho Chang and Padma Patil as Heads and Anthony Goldstein and Terry Boot as prefects!”
This time, Hermione noticed, it was Harry’s turn to stare and blush, directly at Cho. God he was soooo obvious. Next to her, she heard Lavender and Pavarti cheering the loudest for the other Patil twin who waved back at the girls.
“He saved the best for last huh” said Dean Thomas smugly from across from her. She didn’t wanna seem cocky, but she couldn’t help being excited over the idea of being announced to the whole school.
“And finally, for Gryffindor I present to you Hermione Granger and Angelina Johnson as your heads and Ronald Weasley and Dean Thomas as your prefects.” Hermione beamed to the point her face hurt as she looked around at Dean, Ron, and Angelina who were all equally as happy. She loved these moments of when it didn’t matter how out of place she usually felt at Hogwarts, how exhausting and alienating it was and how she longed for her muggle life sometimes. Because in this moment it really felt like she achieved something just for herself. It wasn’t some big, painstaking task like saving Buckbeak or Ron or Harry or Sirius. It wasn’t doing hours and hours of research just to fight a blood supremacist. It was just something as small, but as big as earning the Head Girl title. It was something she knew wouldn’t matter in a few years, but it mattered now, and the impermanence of its importance comforted her. It just felt normal.
Sadly, that feeling didn’t last that long because Dumbledore decided he had one more announcement about the whole ordeal.
“Today I am proud to announce and recognize Hermione Jean Granger as the first ever muggle-born to become head girl! A big step for Hogwarts!”
What the fuck? No one told Hermione about that little announcement, she didn’t expect it at all. Some of the hall was clapping for her, her friends all loudly cheering and hitting her back excitedly, but honestly Hermione felt as if she couldn’t hear any of it. But she could hear all the other doubting, criticizing mummers that no one else seemed to notice.
“They probably just gave her the title because they wanted a muggle - born up there to make them look good.”
“Who even cares what the fuck her blood status is. We don’t need a whole announcement for it.”
“Can’t believe they're letting mudbloods be head girls now.”
Whatever pride, whatever comfort Hermione had just been feeling a second ago was replaced by a feeling of, well – discomfort. The announcement, the cheers, the pats on the back was all so fucking cloying. It made her feel nauseous. It felt as if all her blood had been drained from her then forcefully pushed down her throat again until it was only in her stomach. She probably looked so pale right now. She took it back, she hated being announced in front of the great hall. At least about her blood status. She knew about all the shit muggleborns had to deal with in magical society, of course she did, she had to deal with it first hand. And she knew that it was important to have muggleborns defying stereotypes and breaking barriers and all that shit, but god why did it have to be her? It was so fucking exhausting.
“You okay Mione?” Harry asked with worry, lacing his voice.
“Huh- yeah oh i’m fine sorry, just wasn’t expecting that.” She replied back quickly. Harry still looked anxious but decided not to press on.
But no. Hermione wasn’t ok. Did people even realize how hard she worked for this position? She studied her ass off morning, noon and night until she knew the in’s and out’s of wizarding (and coming from a non-magic background meant she had to study twice as much as her peers). She practiced her magic any chance she got, and honestly was probably more powerful than some teachers at this point. She dealt with all the ridicule from classmates, and even staff, about being a know-it-all and a mudblood and whatever else they decided was wrong with her. Not to mention she did all this while helping Harry with whatever life-threatening problem he was caught up in for that year. But suddenly, it didn’t matter anymore because now some people thought she just got here for being a fucking muggleborn, as that didn’t make her life hell. Now some people thought she shouldn’t be here just because of her blood status. And Hermione knew that people were gonna think this way regardless, but now it just felt like it might as well be on a billboard or broadcasted on wizard radio– if that was a thing.
She just wanted to go to bed and not have to deal with any of this anymore.
Through the commotion, and her staring off into space across the room, she caught Greengrass’ eye again. The blonde smiled at her– and Hermione could tell this time it was a smile – and said something. ‘Congratulations.’ Was that meant for her? Or maybe it was for Parkinson who was sitting right next to her? Hermione decided that it was for Parkinson because she didn’t think she could handle it if it was for her. She was already mad (she didn’t really understand who or at what, but she was mad) and all of this only felt more maudlin in some way. She didn’t smile back at Greengrass despite looking right at her, much to Daphne’s confusion.
Forcefully, Hermione turned herself back to her friends who had since moved on to a new topic. Hermione joined in, trying to distract herself, but never fully succeeding in getting rid of the nauseous feeling so deep in her stomach.