Swan Song
"I am Ironman" Tony snapped his fingers and saw everything reset to the ideal before losing consciousness. He was shocked to feel relieved. He no longer had to hide his feelings. No longer had to walk on eggshells. He no longer had to let the immense love he felt choke him from suppressing it. It was peaceful, knowing that although Bucky and Steve will never know how he feels about them, he is dying to save them and the people that he loves. They will all be okay. They will be together. They will be happy. They will remember him. They may even remember him with rosy retrospection. Sadly, he can't say goodbye properly but he loves them and knows they know they all know he loves them. Peter will be protected and everyone will be happy. happy and alive.
It took Tony four minutes to realize he wasn’t dead - he was in unbelievable pain. It felt like his whole right side was on fire - like it was hotter than fire. Maybe it was hellfire. That was a chilling thought, what if all the lives he saved didn’t compensate for being the merchant of death? What if all the weapons he made destroyed lives and all those lives lost were on his head? What if Wanda was right in the beginning? What if he is hell bound? It was a devastating thought after he convinced himself the snap redeemed him.
Pain.
Too much pain.
It was too real to be an afterlife experience - maybe he didn't die. Maybe he never will and everyone will think he is dead and bury him alive. All he could do was breathe - so he did that as hard as he could. Rhodey would see, he would know that Tony was still breathing even if nobody else paid attention. His honeybear wouldn’t bury him alive. He would notice. Right?
He passed out from the pain.
When he woke up, it was like he unlocked a new feature. He could hear. He was still in immense pain. Rhodey’s voice was soothing though. Although… he was raging at someone.
“- never let you near him if you try to touch him. You better fuck off Rogers and take your hound with you, if he growls at me one more time ill neuter him. Tony is MINE! GET OUT!”
Hmmm, sourpuss seems to have forgotten his manners. It was strange, Rhodey always liked the super soldiers, and it worried Tony that his sugarplum was yelling at them so hard. He would have thought about it more if the pain didn’t make him pass out again. How inconvenient, while he was awake he couldn't move a muscle and it didn't even last long enough to let him think. On the plus side though, passing out means no pain.
“Please tell me it’s out of him. I don't know if he will forgive me. He is in so much pain. He will never forgive me. He never wanted this. I am going to lose him. Tell me it’s out of him please?” Rhodey whispered, desperately. Tony hated waking up to hear his best friend in so much distress. This time the pain was not that bad. This time it was a convulsing pain. He still couldn’t move but at least the pain was not that bad. “Bruce is it out?”
“Yes, Colonel. Your best friend is yours for a reason. He is okay Rhodey. It's just the serum now” Bruce replied.
He was relieved when Rhodey breathed a sigh of relief so loud that Tony felt it in his own body. Unfortunately, the overwhelming relief came with a side effect. He passed out. Again.
This time when he woke up… He could move. He wasn’t in pain. He wasn’t even aching. It was odd, he hadn’t not ached for a decade. It was an amazing thing. Yet it felt odd. He opened his eyes and closed them immediately. The room was dimmed down but it was still too bright. He opened his eyes slower. Saw Bruce to the right of him, facing two screens and Rhodey sleeping on a couch opposite him. He looked peaceful. But before Tony could give in to his compulsion startle Rhodes. Strange appeared right behind Bruce.
“Hello Stark. Welcome back” Strange said smiling.
“Tones!!!” Rhodey jumped up and hugged Tony and they both cried. It was cathartic. It was exhausting. Emotionally. Physically, Tony doesn't think he has ever felt better.
“I love you Tones, I’ve missed you. Welcome back” Bruce kissed him on the forehead “I have to call a few people to let them know you are awake. We have all been struggling to breathe fully, it's not fair that I am selfish with this relief, I have to spread the news. I will meet you back ar the tower" "Love you Brucie" Tony replied, still significantly confused. Bruce left with his phone in his hands.
“Stark I can tell that you have far too many questions rushing around in your head but before you start spouting them I want to clarify things for you. Then I have to leave but I had to see you were awake for myself.” Strange said holding Tony’s attention. Rhodey nodded for Strange to continue. “I put a spell on you, as soon as you snapped - it held your body frozen in time. We got the infinity stones off of you and your team returned them to their appropriate times and spaces. Rhodey and I planned this - I couldn’t tell you or it wouldn’t work. In my vision, you died. But I proposed to Colonel Rhodes that if he can get you the super soldier serum, soon after the snap, it may save you it was a long shot but we had to do something. Rhodes then did something I believe only a true friend would do. He injected himself with the version of extermis you were working on. He did it so he could make sure it was safe for you. That once the healing was done we would be able to remove it. Once we saw it was safe, we injected it into you, then injected you with the serum just in case. We, um we wanted to give you the best shot at survival. Then I removed the spell and you started healing but we knew it was excruciating. It de-aged you, which is the side-effect of Extremis healing such a massive injury. It also burnt some of the super soldier serum off of you. So you are not like Steve and Bucky. Rhodey says you look like you did when you were 30. So congrats. Then, once we were sure you were healed we removed Extremis and moved you to your bedroom - on Bruce’s insistence. We were all looking for ways to do what you would have wanted after forcing so many decisions on you. The super soldier serum then bound to your DNA - which would have been painful too, admittedly not as bad as extremis. There is another thing, but I’ll let Rhodey fill you in on that. I can't tell you what it means to me that you survived Stark. You are more important to people than you know Tones. I am going to leave now to check on the sanctum. See you soon, both of you”
Strange gave him an awkward side hug then disappeared behind a golden ring as soon as Tony got the words “Thank you” out. Tony knew it was because he was sparing Rhodey the embarrassment of facing Tony in front of him. Tony looked at him, Rhodey was not even looking at him. He was barely breathing, eyes filled with shame.
“I am sorry Tones, I know you said you never wanted Extremis in you. I just couldn’t lose you. I can't live in a world that you are not in” By the end of his sentence, they were both sobbing. “Why are you crying Tones, does it hurt?”
“I don’t deserve you. I can't believe you put yourself through that. You treated yourself like an experiment. For me. I-I love you. You are a friend that nobody deserves. Thank you…thank you!”
“I love you too!” Rhodey sagged relieved. “It wasn’t all bad. I got my legs back out of it. Um and…”
Rhodey blushed. He was bashful and sheepish and blushing. It was far too light for the situation they were in but seeing him like that made Tony grin like a Cheshire cat in anticipation.
“Blushing Rhodeybear? Do tell me why” Tony teased.
“So you know how Strange said there was another thing but he would let me tell you what it was?”
“Yeah”
“So when you snapped, it sort of changed something… Um, we now have soulmates, so as cheesy as it sounds - after the snap if soulmates touch each other, the other’s name appears on their body in their handwriting”
Tony grinned, excited “Who did ya get?”
“So you know how we decided that because Pepper and Happy were such a solid couple - we would never tell them how I felt for both of them?”
“Yeah because we decided the same thing for me not telling the Brooklyn twins. Steve and Bucky deserve to not feel guilty for being happy together. I would never get in the way of that no matter how much I love them. The same with you and those two. Plus we both know it's weird that BOTH of us fell for a power couple instead of a single person” Tony giggled. He and Rhodey always bonded over not being able to confess to the people they loved - it made them feel less lonely.
Rhodey got up and started stripping. Down to his boxers.
“Um, Rhodeybear not that you ain't hot shit but I don't wanna see this much of ya!” Tony giggled before his breath was caught. In Pepper’s distinctive cursive handwriting there was her name written high on Rhodey’s left thigh and on his left wrist was ‘Happy Hogan’ in Happy’s messy scrawl.
“They um, they couldn’t stop touching me after Extremis was out of me. They wanted to make sure I was alive and um… we saw our names on each other. They told me they had always wanted me and loved me and that they thought it was one-sided. They both kissed me right away… it was a little dub-con if I am honest but so hot”
Tony’s eyes were shining with happiness for his friend. He was so proud that the purest, most loyal friends he had were all together in a happy relationship. None of the three was left out. But what he said was “Did you have mind-blowing sex?”
“No Tones… We have never left your side altogether. Only the three of us, Strange and Bruce have touched you. We stayed by your side to make sure you were okay and that nobody touched you without you knowing everything. Oh, and it has to be skin-to-skin contact.”
“WHAT?!? Rhodey you have been waiting to bed those two for years why the fuck did you wait?”
“Bruce was clear… none of us have taken a full breath. We were all waiting for you to wake up. Fair warning Peter has an endless supply of snot and he has been crying non-stop so have Kleenex by you when he rushes to see you. I bet Bruce called him first. He threatened us all, warning us to let him know if you even twitch so he can come to you immediately”
“Oh Odin! Does he have a soulmate?” Tony asked dreading the answer, Peter was far too young.
“So far nobody under the age of 25 has reported a name,” Rhodey said “Maybe it's a frontal lobe thing”
“Good!” Tony said relieved and then cringing bodily “Um I think it might have been my fault”
“Well… you did snap, most people figure it was either you or a by-product of the snap”
“Great! Another thing for people to blame me for!”
“Idiot! The “almost” end of the multiverse was terrifying and people felt like they had nothing stable. Now when they see their names they feel solid, safe, and secure. You gave so many people reassurance. It was a much-needed thing, Tones. And before you say it can be used to exploit people or blackmail them by the bad guys knowing people’s weaknesses - bad guys already know what people care about that is what makes them efficient. Everyone needed this… even people who don't have soulmates, or don't have them yet, enjoy the certainty that these bonds bring to society.”
“It was because I was relieved that I was dying and no longer had to hide my feelings for Capsicle and Winter Wonderland. And now I have to pretend all over again. Believe me Rhodes I am happy to be alive, to be with you, to see everyone again. I am dreading seeing them together and pretending I don't want to run into their arms. I just have to make sure they never touch me - I don’t want confirmation that they are not mine. I will not survive it.”
“I will support you no matter what Tones, but you know I have felt that they have always had a thing for you”
“Drop it Rhodes” Tony sighs, falling back into the bed - exhausted emotionally, yet extremely energetic physically.
“Let's talk about your new baby face. How does it feel to be 30 again?”
“Chest doesn't hurt. My left arm isn't shaking. I feel like I could run multiple marathons - I won’t… but I could”
Rhodey closes his eyes in relief.
“So just because you are now an almost super soldier does not mean you forgo even more sleep - also because of your metabolism you have to eat way more. Let's see if you have any of Cap’s tricks. You may not be a full super soldier but let's see what you got. Bend this” Rhodey demanded giving Tony a metal pipe.
Tony tried to bend it - Tried and failed.
“Okay no super strength, it's okay you still have the Ironman suits. Bruce saw that you did get the enhanced healing. We had to re-puncture the IV a lot.” He threw a pen at Tony and it hit Tony square in the nose.
“So… no reflexes… like at all. Run for me. Run Forest Run” Rhodey laughed
Tony ran almost as fast as Steve, definitely at least as fast as Bucky.
“Yesssss! Super speed baby!!!” Tony cheered.
Rhodey whispered something. Tony walked up to him and cocked his head to the side. “What?”
Rhodey brought his lips close to Tony’s ears “NO ENHANCED SENSES, LIKE SUPER HEARING!” He shouted.
Tony flinched, glaring at a laughing Rhodey.
“So you can heal and you’re kinda fast. You always had an almost eidetic memory so that is a given but hopefully, you get endurance because it's just sad when you wheeze getting into bed.”
“Shut up Rhodey” Tony giggled.
He didn't even notice until Peter had launched himself into his lap. He was sopping wet and he was sobbing and wiping snot on Tony’s shoulder. Tony reached to the side table to get the Kleenex - Rhodey had already snatched it away, tossing the near-new Kleenex box into the Trash smirking at Tony and mouthing “Definitely no reflexes” as he left a blubbering Peter alone with Tony, closing the door behind him.