Someone else
Everyone was born with their fate on their skin.
Tony was well accustomed to the story; you will be born, grow, and as time passes the name of the one you are supposed to love for eternity will take form on your skin. It’s your destiny, your fated pair who holds your future. You are supposed to find them, to love them, and to grow old together. He knew all that, what it entailed. As much as he knew he would never experience it.
Because when he was born, there were no traces of impending marks. When he was a toddler, apart from the scrapes and bruises product of his inventive demeanor, his skin was smooth and clear as the day. And when he hit puberty, the scars from his workshop work were the only things adorning him.
When he entered adulthood, he understood the mark would never come.
It was a rare case but not unheard of, people knew it could happen, for someone to be born without a name, but it still wasn’t an accepted phenomenon. People thought, because no one knew, that an unmarked skin represented another mark altogether. It was the mark of the unloved ones, people who were born too rotten and broken to love someone or for someone to ever love them back.
The destined to be alone.
His father was never pleased with his “condition.” A disapproving look always tainted his eyes as he watched him grow up. When he was a child, Tony believed he could gain his approval if he tried hard enough, he could demonstrate that he was worthy of the name Stark.
He would sneak into his workshop to show his creations, everything he was proud of or could think of, and wait for his father to be impressed. He waited for the eternal frown to leave his father's temples, he waited to be worthy of affection. But Howard would always inspect the small peace offering and find every defect in a simple glance.
“In this family, we don’t accept imperfections, Anthony.” He would remind him.
And when Jarvis would find him crying his little heart out in the bushes, he would carry him to the mansion and cook his favorite pasta for dinner. It was only until he hit puberty that he realized Howard was never talking about his creations.
It had stung, for a long time, and during his adolescence and young adulthood, he tried to use alcohol and parties as a balm for it. If it was true that he did not have a heart capable of loving and being loved, he could at least enjoy the wonders of carnal pleasure with the body of anyone willing to pass through his bed. He was desired, in a way, not in the way he wanted, but he was desired.
-
Now pushing forty, he liked to think that he had healed his childhood wounds.
With time, he had accepted what the future held for him and learned to stay an arm's length away from everyone to protect himself. He learned to ignore the hurtful comments, acidic and malicious, to put a magazine smile in front of the cameras and prying eyes. He used his confidence, no matter how much of it was faked, and his genius mind, to become one of the most successful engineers in the country. People had to stop asking about his markless skin when they were too busy asking him about his revolutionary technology.
And, more importantly, Tony decided at the ripe age of twenty-eight, when he met a beautiful blond boy with deep blue eyes, that he didn’t believe in destiny.
At least, he didn’t think he did.
-
The workshop was a mess, he could admit that, but he was too tired to clean it at that point. Steve would scold him about never cleaning up his space and potentially leaving dangerous tools out in the open for him to get hurt. He would do it later, he promised to the small Steve in his head.
As if summoned, his phone chimed.
I’ll come home late. Stuck at work.
Tony signed, dinner could be forgotten then.
With tired feet, he dragged himself upstairs and into the kitchen to look for a well-deserved cup of coffee and grab something to eat. It was supposed to be movie night too, and he had reserved the rest of the evening free. He supposed he could clean the workshop now.
It was late at night when he received Pepper’s call.
“How was it?” Asked the redhead, looking as collected as always on the screen.
“What was what?”
“The dinner? At that fancy Italian restaurant?” Pepper was unimpressed at him playing dumb.
“It was- Steve had something coming up at work- We didn’t end up going,” Tony admitted, rubbing his temples at what was about to come.
“Again?” The woman said sternly. “How many times have been this month?”
“He is busy, the magazine is growing quickly, and he has to be there.” Tony defended instantly, well aware that he would never make Pepper change her mind and that he might not believe what he was saying completely. “You are always pointing out his flaws.”
“That is because I don’t like him, and it seems like they are invisible to you.”
“He is a good man, I find it hard to understand why you dislike him so much. I would have believed you would get along well.”
“He has a name, Tony.”
And that said it all, didn’t it? Pepper had always believed that someone with a name printed on their skin should never be with someone unmarked. It was against the popular beliefs and destined to be a failure in the end. She had always told him to find a different person, someone kind and patient. Someone who was not destined to be with someone else. She told him to do what she had done.
And Tony was happy for her finding love, she deserved it. The sole existence of Pepper, assertive and perfect Pepper with her unmarked skin, reassured Tony that they were not the unloved ones. Pepper could never not be loved. But he couldn’t do the same, he couldn’t let go of Steve.
“That doesn’t have to mean anything. We are happy together.” And they were. Sure, Steve and him had their problems, they couldn’t be more different and both were too stubborn for their own good. But at the end of the day, they loved each other, right? That should count for something.
Right?
“How long have you been together, Tony? Where is the ring?” The question was scalding hot in Tony’s guts. Tony winced. Maybe, years ago, he could have brushed it off, arguing that they were still young and taking it slow. But lately, the topic has started to be sensitive for the brunette. He might want a ring now, he might want it more than anything else if it is with Steve. But his boyfriend had never expressed wanting to commit in that way, he had not in a long time at least, if he was being honest.
“It is not the right time. He is still establishing his magazine, so we decided to wait.” He lied.
“That doesn’t change the fact that it had been ten years since you guys got together, and you don’t even know his family or his friends.” The redhead pointed out, her eyes keeping him pinned in his place even through the screen. “You introduced him to Jarvis and Ana, to me and all of our friends.”
And that was true, while he had been very excited to present his boyfriend to all his loved ones, happily dragging Steve to meet what he considered his family, Steve was much more reserved. He didn’t talk much about his family or friends. He was told his friend group was weird, and it was pointless to meet them, and the topic was closed.
Tony had never pushed.
“I am not bothered, really. It will happen one day.” I hope, was left unsaid.
Pepper sighed, heavily.
“Yeah.”
Tony, despite himself, smiled. “I know you are worried about me, but don’t be, I am fine. Steve is a great man, and he is taking care of me. I love him, he loves me. The destiny stuff is not important.” He reassured his friend.
“It had been too long, Tony. Why is he?- I-” Pepper bit her lip and glanced away for a few seconds. “I just worry, I am sorry.”
“I know.” He said with a fond smile.
I do too.
_
It was almost eleven when he hung up his call, but when he headed to their shared bedroom, Steve was still not there.
It was weird, but he didn’t give it much thought, he was exhausted and Steve should be home any minute. He prepared to sleep still hoping he would come into the door before the lights were turned off, but he fell asleep waiting.
After some time, he didn’t know how much, the sound of heavy steps made him stir in his sleep. “Steve?”
“It’s me. Go back to sleep.” He responded softly. “I will be in bed in a minute.”
Steve didn’t even glance at him, he went straight to the bathroom, semblance tired. Tony felt something was off, but he didn’t pry. Determined not to fight today. Once Steve was tucked in bed, he allowed himself to doze off again, silence heavy between them. In the distance, he could feel careful fingers combing his hair, but he couldn’t be sure. Maybe it was a dream.
_
He was awakened by the sound of the shower running and the sunlight hitting his face. He groaned, trying to find with his closed eyes a pillow to cover his head. He sometimes hated that Steve was such a morning person to heart, that and that he never forgot to open the curtains. He snuggled into the sheets, pillow covering his face as he tried to fall asleep again, only to snap his eyes open at the sound of Steve’s ringtone.
He left the phone ring, it was not for him after all, until the sound died down. And he would have left it at that if the phone hadn’t started chiming incessantly a minute later. Now, very annoyed, Tony threw the sheets off himself to get to the phone. He was planning to hand it to Steve, but the screen lit up and the messages just popped.
Steve, we seriously need to talk.
Yesterday you left before we were done.
We are destined to be together, you know it.
Call me back.
What?
What was this?
His thoughts were interrupted by Steve yanking the phone away from his hands. He was paralyzed in place, feeling numb. “Steve?... What-?”
“You shouldn’t read my messages.”
Anger started filling the numbness. “What did I just read? What the fuck does that mean?” He yelled.
The semblance of the blond man changed, shoulders dropping as his blue eyes looked at anything but him. “I was going to talk to you yesterday, but you seemed so tired and, I was planning on having breakfast before telling you”
“Tell me what, exactly?”
“Tony…”
“You met them, didn’t you?” Tony’s eyes filled with tears as he connected the dots. “Your person,” He said, his voice just above a whisper.
That was not possible, was it? Steve loved him and had promised to be by his side knowing that Tony’s name was not marked on his skin. And Tony knew Steve was a man of his word, always loyal and trusty, but he also knew that there was someone who was supposed to be at Steve’s side, someone who wasn’t him.
Steve hadn’t met them, had he?
The blond’s eyes found his, expression unreadable. “Tony I-”
“Don’t bullshit me Rogers, did you meet them?”
“I- I did.”
Tony would be ashamed to admit that he had to suppress a sob at that moment. He moved past him in an instant, reaching for the bathroom. Steve stopped him by the arm.
“Don’t touch me, I need- “
“Tony, listen to me.” Steve pleaded, grip surprisingly tight on his arm, but careful not to be painful.
“I don’t need to listen.” He tried to rip his arm away from his grasp. “I already know, I don’t need to listen.” He would not cry in front of him, he would not.
“What?” Steve took him by the arms as he fought weakly, he made him face him. “Tony, calm down. Listen to me.”
He was going to make him say it?
“Stop it, Steve. It’s useless, you found them. It’s over.”
“What?” At that, the blond did let him go. Brows furrowing in concern.
“Oh, don’t play dumb, Rogers.” Tony spat with a bitter smile on his face. “You lied to me! You were with them last night while I was-” His voice broke, and he shut up before he could break down crying.
“Nothing happened,” He hurried up to say. “It was just to clarify things just after I met her by accident in a business meeting. It was nothing”
But it couldn’t be “nothing.”
We were talking about the greatest moment in a person’s life.
Finding their destined person.
Suddenly, everything came crashing down on him. Had Steve never shown him to the world because he was hoping to find his destined one? Was he only something to make the wait less boring? Something to keep his bed warm? Was that why he had never wanted to commit to him?
God, if that thought didn’t hurt.
He could never blame Steve for wanting what the universe had crafted for him. He had always been such a traditional man that the mere fact that he had invited him on a date knowing his skin didn’t have any mark and his own had another name altogether was a miracle. As were the dates and years that came after.
He should be glad that he was allowed to love and be loved, at least for some time.
“Look at me, please?” The soft voice of Steve coaxed him to meet his gaze watery and pleading. He was kneeling in front of him. When did he get there? Presenting a small velvet box.
“Steve- What-”
“I was planning to ask you at our next anniversary.” His hands combed his hair in a frustrated tick. “But this had to happen, and now it’s ruined and-”
Tony took the small red box in his hands, his favorite tone of red.
“Please marry me.”
He couldn’t talk. He was mesmerized by the ring. A simple gold thick band but with delicate sculpture, with a small ruby nested in the center. It was perfect.
“Steve, I- you just met your-”
“I don’t care and I told her that much.” Steve said as he was not talking about what everyone else dreamed for most of their lives. He took the ring and slipped it on his annular finger, fitting perfectly. “I don’t want anyone else, I want to marry you or no one else in this world.”
Tony hesitated, guilt sitting unpleasantly in his stomach. And Steve just watched him expectantly with pleading eyes holding his hand for dear life. “I love you.”
And oh, heaven knew how much Tony wanted to marry this man. How much he loved him with all the power in his broken soul. Heavy tears finally escaped his eyes while he gave a small nod, he would hate himself for looking so pathetic if he wasn’t so exhausted.
Steve kissed his tears away and let him calm down in his arms, murmuring sweet nothings in his ears. There was a lot that they needed to talk about, but at the moment, he allowed himself to relinquish his reeling mind.