Chemistry & Crushes

“I’m sorry. Could you repeat that?”

“I said I think I’m in love with my best friend!”

Right. So she wasn’t dreaming, MJ thought to herself. 

“Right, got it. Well…can’t say I didn’t see this coming.”

“MJ! This isn’t the time for jokes. This is serious!”

MJ quickly shushed Gwen. “Gwen, calm down before my parents wake up! Let’s sit down and talk about this.”

Gwen took a deep breath and sat on the edge of MJ’s bed, her hands fidgeting nervously. MJ joined her, looking at her friend with concern and curiosity. “Alright, start from the beginning. What happened?”

Gwen recounted the events of the previous night, from the moment on the rooftop to the sudden realization that had left her reeling. As she spoke, MJ listened intently, nodding occasionally. When Gwen finally reached the end of her story, she looked at MJ, her eyes wide with anxiety.

But rather than sharing that anxiety, MJ seemed confused. “So, you realized you have feelings for Miles. Why are you freaking out about it?”

Gwen stared at her in disbelief. “Because this could ruin everything, MJ! What if things get awkward between us, and we can’t go back to being friends?”

“Gwen, I doubt that will happen. You and Miles have a strong bond. This isn’t going to break it.”

Gwen stood up, starting to pace again. “But what if it does? What if I lose him because of this? I can’t imagine my life without Miles in it.”

MJ watched Gwen’s frantic pacing, her heart aching for her friend. “Gwen, listen to me. You’re not going to lose him. Miles cares about you a lot. You’re his best friend, too. He’s not going to throw that away because of some feelings.”

“You don’t know that.”

MJ sighed, standing up to face Gwen. “You’re right. I don’t. And neither do you. That’s why you need to talk to him. Keeping this bottled up is only going to make things worse. You have to trust that your friendship is strong enough to handle this.”

The two friends stood there, the weight of the conversation settling over them. Gwen knew MJ was right, but the fear of the unknown was overwhelming. She took a deep breath, trying to steady her racing heart.

“I don’t think you should be worried, though,” MJ continued, returning to her bed. “He’d say yes in a heartbeat if you asked him out.”

Gwen’s eyes widened. “What? No he wouldn’t.”

MJ rolled her eyes, exasperated. “Gwen, he’s crazy about you. Trust me on this.”

Gwen crossed her arms defensively. “And what if you’re wrong? What if I ask him out, and he says no? Again, it’ll ruin everything.

MJ leaned forward. “Gwen. I was right about your feelings about Miles, wasn’t I?”

Gwen sighed and looked at the ground, scuffing her foot against it.

“...yes,” she mumbled.

“Exactly. So, believe me now when I say this. I’ve seen the way he looks at you. He lights up when you’re around.”

Gwen hesitated, her mind racing. “But we’ve been friends for so long. Maybe he’s just comfortable with me.”

“Comfortable? Gwen, he’s always going out of his way to spend time with you, to make you laugh, to make sure you’re okay. Remember that week you got really sick?”

Yeah, she did. Gwen had caught the nastiest case of the flu and was basically bedridden the entire week. Her Dad was smack dab in the middle of a tough case, and Gwen refused to let him stay home just for her, which was a terrible idea because she couldn’t do much by herself.

But the second Miles found out, he immediately did everything he could to make her feel better. He took notes for all her classes and would rush to her apartment the second school was over. He took care of her, whether it was getting her soup, rubbing her back when she vomited, or simply sitting with her so she wasn’t alone. He probably spent more time with her than he did at home that week.

“Yeah, I remember,” she said softly.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen him that concerned. He wanted to do everything he could to help you feel better. He’s always done that for you. Those aren’t just friendly gestures if you ask me.”

Gwen bit her lip, uncertainty still gnawing at her. “I don’t know, MJ. What if I’m reading too much into things?”

MJ sighed, her voice softening. “Gwen, you’re not. Miles cares about you. Deeply. Can’t you see that?” 

Gwen slumped down beside her friend, putting her head in her hands.

“I'm just scared, MJ,” she whispered. “I don’t- I can’t mess this up with him.”

MJ reached out, wrapping an arm around Gwen’s shoulder. “I get it, Gwen. It’s scary. But sometimes, you have to take a leap of faith. If you never take the chance, you’ll always wonder what if.”

It was silent momentarily before Gwen looked up, meeting MJ’s eyes. Her voice was small. “You really think he feels the same way?”

MJ smiled, nodding confidently. “I do. I really do. And if I’m wrong, you can yell at me later. But I don’t think I am.”

MJ pulled out her phone and showed Gwen the newest school newsletter. In it, there was an announcement about a winter homecoming dance.

“Look at this,” MJ said, pointing to the announcement. “Ask Miles to go with you. You can even ask to go as friends if it makes you feel better. Test the waters a bit.”

“I don’t know about this MJ. I’m not a fan of dances.”

“I know. Just work with me, ok? Think about it. Promise me you’ll at least consider it.”

Gwen sighed but managed a small smile. “Alright, alright. I promise I’ll think about it.”

MJ grinned, satisfied. “Good. Now, it’s Saturday, so if we spend the weekend formulating a plan…”

“Oh crap!” Gwen yelled, standing up and rushing back to the window. “I’m supposed to be studying with Miles today! I gotta go home and get my stuff. Thanks, MJ!”

Before the redhead could get another word in, Gwen was gone.

“The things I do for that girl.”

Later that day, Miles and Gwen were in his room studying (with the door wide open, as always.) Their textbooks and notebooks were spread around them. They had been hard at work for a couple of hours now.

Miles let out a dramatic sigh, dropping his pencil. “I just want to play Mario Kart now," he moaned, flopping back onto the floor.

Gwen laughed, looking down at him from her spot on his bed. “Come on, Miles. Just a few more problems, and then we can play. I promise.”

Miles groaned, rolling onto his stomach and glaring playfully up at her. “You said that fifteen minutes ago.”

Gwen reached down and gently ruffled his curls, her fingers absentmindedly running through them. Miles hummed in satisfaction from the massage. “I mean it this time. Finish these problems, and I’ll even let you choose the first track.”

Miles’s eyes lit up with mischief. “Rainbow Road?”

Gwen rolled her eyes but couldn’t suppress a smile. “If that’s what it takes to get you to finish your homework, then yes, Rainbow Road.”

Miles chuckled, sitting up and grabbing his pencil again. “You drive a hard bargain, Stacy. But you have a deal!”

She chuckled at his enthusiasm. He was too cute sometimes. As he worked on the math problems, Gwen continued to run her fingers through his hair, enjoying the comfortable moment between them. 

“So,” Miles said after a few minutes, not looking up from his notebook, “what’s been going on with you? You seem a little off today.”

Gwen hesitated, her fingers pausing in his hair for a moment. She hadn't expected him to notice, but of course, he did. He was always perceptive when it came to her.

“Another thing I love about him."

“It’s nothing,” she responded nonchalantly. “Just thinking about stuff.”

Miles looked up at her, his eyes searching her face. “Stuff like what?”

Gwen shrugged, trying to brush it off. “You know, school, the band, life. The usual.”

Miles raised an eyebrow, not entirely convinced but deciding not to push it. “Alright, but you know you can talk to me about anything, right?”

Gwen smiled, her heart warming at his words. “I know, Miles. Thanks.”

Letting Miles get back to work, Gwen idly picked up one of his sketchbooks from the floor. It was one of the ones he had used while in Europe. She began to flip through the pages.

Each one was filled with scenes from his trip. The architecture, the street art, the people. Gwen marveled at the detail and emotion in each sketch, feeling as if she could almost experience the places herself through his art.

“He’s such a great artist.”

As she turned another page, she suddenly came across a series of portraits. Her heart skipped a beat when she realized they were of her. Miles had drawn her in different settings, capturing various expressions and moods. There was one of her laughing, another of her lost in thought, and yet another of her looking directly at the viewer with a soft smile.

Gwen’s cheeks flushed as she took in the beauty of the drawings. In every one, she looked stunning, more beautiful than ever. The way Miles had captured her essence made her feel cherished and seen. MJ’s words echoed in her mind. 

“He’s crazy about you. Trust me on this.”

Looking at the drawings, Gwen couldn’t help but feel a spark of hope. Maybe Miles did feel more for her than just friendship. The tenderness and attention to detail in his sketches. It all suggested that she was special to him.

Gwen’s fingers traced the lines of one of the portraits, her heart swelling with hope and fear. What if Miles did see her the way she saw him? What if their friendship could become something more?

She imagined the two at the dance, Miles dressed in a suit, that lopsided grin shining brightly at her. The two of them pressed close together as they danced the night away. Him leaning down halfway, allowing Gwen to steer them off as they leaped off the cliff into everything together, sealing her lips to his.

Gwen shook her head furiously as the daydream faded, willing her heated cheeks to cool down. She closed the sketchbook gently, placing it back where she found it. As she glanced over at Miles, who was still diligently working on his math problems, she felt a surge of affection and, more deeply, desire. She wanted that dream to come true.

“Hey, Miles, did you see the school newsletter?” she asked, trying to sound casual.

Miles nodded, not taking his eyes off his notebook. “Yeah, I saw it. Why?”

“Well, there’s a winter homecoming dance coming up. Have you thought about going?" Gwen asked, her heart pounding.

Miles shrugged, pausing his work and looking at her. “I don't know if I want to go,” he said.

“Why not?”

Miles sighed, leaning back against the bed. “I guess I don’t think anyone would ask me. And I wouldn’t want to go alone. That would be lame.”

Gwen frowned, confused. “What do you mean you don't think anyone would ask you? You're Miles Morales. You're smart, funny, and talented. A little nerdy, but I think that only adds to your charm.”

Her joke got a wry smile out of him, but that quickly disappeared as he shook his head, looking down at his hands.

“I don’t know, Gwen. I’ve never really been that guy. You know, the one girls notice. I’ve always been more of a background type.”

Gwen felt a pang of sadness at his words. “Miles, are you serious? You can’t really believe that!”

Miles shrugged again. “It’s just... I’ve never had anyone show that kind of interest in me, not like other guys at school. And it doesn’t bother me! Don’t get me wrong. But, the idea of going to a dance alone and just standing there awkwardly... it’s not appealing.”

“Miles, you’re amazing. Any girl would be lucky to go with you,” she blurted out before slapping her hands over her mouth.

Miles stared at her, his eyes reflecting that same intense look from yesterday. There was something in his gaze that made Gwen’s heart race, a mixture of surprise, warmth, and something she couldn’t quite place. But whatever it was, it gave her the courage to press forward.

“Miles, would you-” Gwen started, but before she could finish, Rio appeared in the doorway.

“Miles, Gwen, I’m heading out to run an errand real quick,” Rio said with a smile, unaware of what she had interrupted. “I was thinking about picking up Chinese on my way back. You two okay with that?”

“Sure, Mom, that sounds great,” Miles replied, his eyes lingering on Gwen before turning to Rio and smiling.

“Alright. I’ll be back in a bit,” she called out and left.

The two teens heard the front door open and close, leaving them alone in the flat. But the moment was broken, and Gwen felt all the courage she had built up leave her.

Miles turned back to her, curiosity in his eyes. “What were you about to say, Gwen?”

Gwen hesitated, feeling a wave of uncertainty wash over her. “Oh, um…I was just going to say I’m not sure I’m going to the dance either. It’s not really my style, you know.”

Miles looked a little disappointed but nodded. “Yeah, I get that. High school dances are weird, man.”

Gwen forced a smile, trying to hide her frustration at the missed opportunity. “Yeah, they are.”

They fell back into silence, the only sounds being the scratch of Miles’s pencil on paper and the occasional rustle of pages. Finally, Miles finished the last problem and looked up at Gwen with a triumphant grin. “Done! Now, can we please play Mario Kart?”

Gwen laughed, nodding. “Yes, you can start the game. Just don’t complain when I beat you on Rainbow Road.”

Miles jumped up, grabbing the controllers and game console, and walking out into the living room to set it up. As Gwen followed, she couldn’t help but feel a mix of relief and regret. She had almost asked him, almost taken that step, but obviously, it wasn’t the right moment.

“But don’t worry about that,” she thought as she settled next to Miles on the couch and started playing. “There’s still plenty of opportunities between now and the dance to ask him. You can do this Stacy!"

She couldn’t do this.

The days and weeks passed quickly, and before Gwen knew it, they were in the last week of October. And despite her best efforts, she still hadn’t managed to ask Miles to the dance. Each time she worked up the courage to try, something seemed to get in the way.

Attempt 1: In the Hallway

Gwen spotted Miles at his locker, gathering his books for the next class. She took a deep breath and approached him, her heart pounding.

“Hey, Miles, I was wondering if you-”

Suddenly, a student rushing by bumped into Gwen, causing her to stumble into Miles, who dropped his books. They both scrambled to pick them up.

“Oh! Sorry about that,” Gwen muttered, handing him a book.

“No worries,” Miles replied with a smile. “What were you saying?”

Gwen opened her mouth to continue, but the bell rang loudly, cutting her off mid-sentence. Students flooded the hallway, and Miles was swept away in the crowd before she could finish her question.

“Ugh, of course,” Gwen sighed, watching him disappear.

Attempt 2: At Lunch

Gwen and Miles sat at their usual lunch table, chatting and laughing. She took a deep breath, ready to ask him.

“Miles, I was thinking about the winter dance, and I-”

Peter suddenly appeared, plopping down next to them with a tray full of food. “Hey, guys! What's up?”

“Peter!” Gwen exclaimed, trying to hide her frustration. “We were just—”

Peter, oblivious, started telling a loud, animated story about his latest science project, complete with exaggerated hand gestures. He knocked over his drink, which spilled all over Gwen’s tray.

“Seriously, Peter?” Gwen groaned as Miles handed her a napkin, trying not to laugh.

Attempt 3: After School

Gwen and Miles were walking home together, the afternoon sun casting long shadows on the sidewalk. She knew this was her chance.

“Miles, there’s something I’ve been meaning to ask you. Would you go-”

A car horn blared loudly, startling them both. Miles’ mom, Rio, had pulled up to give him a ride home. She rolled down the window and shouted, “Hi, mijo! Need a lift?”

Miles smiled apologetically at Gwen. “Sorry, Gwen. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?”

As he got into the car, Gwen muttered, “Great timing, Mrs. Morales. Just great.”

Attempt 4: In the Library

They were studying together in the library, surrounded by books and the soft hum of whispered conversations. Gwen decided to try again.

“Miles, about the dance-”

A loud crash echoed through the library as someone knocked over a stack of books. The librarian rushed over, shushing everyone and restoring order. As Gwen and Miles looked over, they saw Peter sheepishly standing amidst the fallen books.

“Peter, what are you doing here?” Gwen whispered, exasperated.

Peter shrugged apologetically, whispering back, “Needed a book for my project.”

By the time things calmed down, the moment was lost, and Gwen could only shake her head in disbelief.

End of Montage

Gwen moaned and slammed her head against her locker, causing a few students nearby to glance over curiously. “This is never going to work,” she groaned, turning to MJ, who was standing next to her with an amused expression.

MJ rolled her eyes. “Not with that attitude. You need to hurry up, or someone else will ask Miles to the dance.”

Gwen sighed, leaning her forehead against the cool metal of the locker. “But every time I try, something goes wrong! Maybe it’s a sign.”

MJ crossed her arms, shaking her head. “No, it’s not a sign. It’s just bad luck. Hilarious, for sure, but bad luck. You can’t let that stop you. If you wait too long, you’ll miss your chance.”

Another sigh. “I just don’t know if I can do it,” Gwen admitted, feeling defeated.

MJ placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “You can, Gwen. You just have to find the right moment.”

“And when will that be?”

“Uhh…”

“Oh, never mind. Maybe I’ll try the next time we’re alone.” Gwen glanced at her watch, frowning. “Speaking of, where is Miles? He was supposed to meet us here.”

“You’re right. He should have been here by now.”

Gwen’s worry grew as she scanned the hallway. “He said he was coming to our band practice tonight. I hope nothing happened.”

Just then, Gwen saw Pavitr walking by and called out to him. “Hey, Pav!”

The boy turned when he heard someone calling his name, a large grin covering his face when he saw who it was.

“Oh hey, Gwen!” he replied cheerfully. Gwen almost laughed at the eagerness in his greeting. 

In the two years since he had transferred into Visions, Gwen could count on one hand the number of times she’d seen Pav be even remotely down. He always radiated positive energy no matter what. It was annoying at times, but he was so nice it was impossible to hate him.

“What’s up? I can’t wait for the show tomorrow! You guys rock!”

“Thanks Pav. That’s actually kind of what I need you for. Have you seen Miles? He’s in your AP Bio class, right? He’s supposed to come to practice with us.”

Pavitr nodded. “Yeah, he is! He was talking to his lab partner when I left.”

“Oh. Who’s his lab partner.”

“Felicia Hardy.”

Gwen’s eyes widened, and her attention was immediately piqued. Felicia Hardy was the most popular girl in school. Stunningly pretty with platinum blonde hair and some of the best grades in the school. Her parents were super rich, too. And, to Gwen’s annoyance, she was a fairly nice girl. She’d never heard anyone have a bad word to say about her. In short, she was perfect. A fact Gwen had always been a little jealous of.

“Gwen?”

She must’ve been silent for too long because Pav was looking at her weirdly.

“Sorry. Thanks again, Pav. I guess I’ll wait for him for a bit longer. See you at the show!”

“See ya!”

As Pavitr walked away, MJ came up to her, eyebrow raised.

“Felicia Hardy? He’s partners with the most popular girl in school? Huh.”

“What could she possibly want with Miles?” Gwen muttered.

“Let me guess, you wanna go find him?”

Gwen didn’t respond with words, simply taking off. 

“Gwen, wait! Hold up!”

They navigated the crowded hallways, dodging students as they made their way toward the science wing where the AP Bio classes were held.

When they finally reached the classroom, they saw Miles and Felicia standing just outside, engaged in what seemed to be a friendly conversation. Felicia was smiling and laughing at something Miles had said.

Gwen felt a pang of jealousy but tried to shake it off. “Okay, let’s see what this is about,” she whispered to MJ as they approached.

Felicia noticed them first and waved. “Hey, Gwen, MJ. How's it going?”

Gwen forced a smile. “Hi, Felicia. We were just looking for Miles. We have band practice, and he's supposed to help us carry some things.”

Miles looked up, his face lighting up when he saw them. “Oh, hey! Sorry, I got caught up talking to Felicia about class.”

Felicia nodded, still smiling. “Yeah, we were discussing some details.”

Gwen’s jealousy flared again, but she kept her tone even. “That’s great. Ready to go, Miles?”

Miles nodded, turning to Felicia. “I’ll catch up with you later. Thanks for the help.”

Felicia shook her head. “No, thank you, Miles.” Then, to Gwen's shock, Felicia leaned in and kissed Miles on the cheek.

“See you later,” she said, walking away with a wave. Miles slowly placed his hand on the spot where she kissed him, a light flush rising in response.

That was the last straw for Gwen. She rushed up to Miles, her emotions bubbling over. “Miles, what was that about!?” she demanded, her voice sharper than she intended.

Miles, still in a daze from what had just happened, blinked and turned to her. “Oh, uh, Felicia asked me to help her study. Well, for us to study together. She was just thanking me for helping her with Bio.”

“That’s a heck of a way to say thank you,” MJ said.

Miles’s blush deepened, which only served to make Gwen more angry.

“Can we just get going already,” she snapped at them.

As they walked away, Gwen couldn't help but glance back, just barely catching Felicia turning down the hallway. A pit formed in her stomach as she watched the girl take one little glance back their way, her gaze focused on Miles before she disappeared around the corner. 

MJ noticed Gwen’s distraction and nudged her. “You okay?”

Gwen sighed. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

That couldn’t have been further from the truth. Gwen was not fine at all. She knew what Felicia was up to. She liked Miles. And that worried Gwen. Extremely.