Human Stuff
The ship was huge— bigger than any of the ships she had seen before. It sliced through the waves at a terrifying clip, kicking up white spray and sending the waves rolling. Hermione allowed herself to flow with the waves, ducking under the water so that just her eyes were visible. She could see people— real, live humans— working in an unbroken rhythm, belting out a song that managed to carry over the wind. One of them, a woman, stood on the very edge of the ship, gripping the rope in one hand and balancing precariously on the beam. Her blonde hair flowed out dramatically behind her and her eyes were sharp and as blue as the sky. Hermione found herself following along, doing her best to stay close to the ship and out of sight.
The voices of the sailors rose and fell, mimicking the rock of the ocean. If she concentrated hard enough, Hermione thought that she could hear the woman's voice mixed in with the sailors. She did not know what compelled her to do it, but Hermione soon found herself humming along to the song.
Maybe she wanted to see if the stories the elders told were true. Maybe she wanted to see if mermaids could indeed lure unsuspecting sailors to their watery demise. Or maybe she wanted to see the blonde sailor once more.
Either way, Hermione found herself opening her mouth and singing the melody that Harry had taught her, calling out to the blonde. Soon, the sailor in question appeared— looking over the edge of the ship in confusion. Hermione froze, watching as the sailor's sharp blue eyes moved towards the water. She barely had time to dive beneath the waves and out of sight.
She did not know what she would do if she found herself locked in that sharp, focused gaze.
Eventually, the sailor seemed to give up and retreated from the edge of the ship. Hermione poked her head above the water once more and watched as the ship became little more than a dot in the distance.
“Wow,” she whispered, placing one hand on her chest in an attempt to calm her racing heart. A splash and a frantic call of “Hermione!” is all the warning she got before something slammed into her back. Hermione yelped and whirled around so fast that her hair swung completely around and whacked her in the face. She saw red stripes standing out against the blue of the ocean and brushed the hair out of her face with a sigh.
“Ron!” she exclaimed. “What was that for?”
He chuckled and swam back a little, looking anywhere but at her. “Sorry, ‘Mione. I was just wondering where you were since you weren’t in your regular spots.”
Hermione shrugged, looking around at the open sea and sky surrounding them. “I felt like having a change of scenery,” she said with a grin.
“And you picked here?” he asked, looking around warily. “It’s so… empty.”
“Have you never been to the surface before?” Hermione asked, raising a brow. Ron sputtered and looked away.
“No! I mean, I come up here all the time,” he said. “My friends and I just… love it up here.” He chuckled awkwardly before looking around once more. “There’s totally no risk of being scooped up by fishing nets or seagulls and ending up as someone’s dinner—” A stray piece of kelp floated by and he shrieked. “‘Mione, we should go!”
Hermione snorted, spotting a nest in the distance, peacefully bobbing in the water.
“Right,” she replied, beginning to swim once more, keeping a leisurely pace. “You definitely come up here all the time.”
“Hey!” Ron hurried to catch up to her, leaving a frantic trail of bubbles behind him. “I’m up here now aren’t I?” He paused for a moment before smiling bashfully. “With you.”
Hermione raised a brow. “Are you flirting with me?” she asked.
Immediately, his face blanched. “What?! No, ew! I don’t want to flirt with you, why would I do that?”
“Ouch. You’re really breaking my heart here,” Hermione replied, dramatically placing a hand on her chest. Ron stared at her for a moment before she broke out into cackles, rolling over onto her back, and kicking up a spray of water with her tail.
“Oh, shut up,” Ron grumbled, sulking deeper into the water as his fins turned a peculiar shade of red.
“You’re blushing!” she exclaimed. Ron scowled and flicked water at her in response.
“It’s sunburn!” he replied defensivly. “You get it up here!”
Deciding to take pity on him, Hermione reached into her bag and pulled out a shiny metal object. It looked similar to a trident but with four prongs instead of three and no sharp edges to skewer enemies with.
“Look at what I found,” she said, holding it out to him. Warily, Ron swam closer, squinting at the shining metal.
“What is it?” he asked.
“I have no idea,” Hermione said with a shrug, tucking it back into her bag. She watched as a white ball went careening into the nest at an alarming speed, knocking up a cloud of feathers at the landing and nearly capsizing the pile of peacefully floating sticks. “But we’re about to find out!” she exclaimed, putting on a burst of speed and leaving Ron in the bubbles.
“Ginny!” she called waving her arm in the air once she got within shouting distance. A fluffy white head with a red plume of feathers sticking up haphazardly popped up.
“Hermione!” Ginny called, lifting one wing and waving like crazy. “Fancy seeing you here.”
Hermione laughed, coming to a stop at the edge of the nest. “Well, I am in need of your expertise.” She pulled out the trident-esque object and held it out to the gull.
“Ahh!” Ginny said, leaning forward and squinting one eye closed. “More human paraphernalia.”
“Do you know what it is?” Ron piped up from where he was floating a few flicks away. Ginny scoffed, taking the object and twirling it through her feathers.
“Of course I know what it is, kelphead,” she replied. “It’s a dinglehopper!”
“That doesn’t sound real,” Ron replied, crossing his fins. Ginny snapped her beak at him in reply and he squeaked, ducking behind Hermione.
“What do they use it for?” she asked, trying her best to not let a fight erupt between the two of them. They tended to get messy really quickly and she’s had to save Ron from being eaten more than once.
“Well,” Ginny said, after shooting one last glare at Ron. “It’s mainly used for personal grooming, making their hair look all nice and stylish for big events.”
Ginny handed the dinglehopper back and Hermione carefully ran it through the bottom strands of her hair. She could see how it worked but was a little disappointed that it was not a mini-weapon of war.
“Oh!” she said, setting the dinglehopper onto the nest and pulling something else out. “What is this? I found it a few days ago and haven’t been able to figure it out.”
Ginny blinked for a moment before grabbing it and turning it over. “A snarfblat,” she said, finally, holding it up in triumph. “I usually see them puffing away at it— watch and learn.”
Ginny took a deep breath, put her beak on the mouthpiece, and blew. A lone strand of seaweed sailed out of it and succeeded in smacking Ron in the face. He sputtered in alarm and flailed, much to their amusement.
Ginny blew once more, cheeks puffing out in effort before frowning and shaking it vigorously. “Strange,” she said. “Usually there's music coming out of these things.”
It was like lightning had struck her brain.
Music!
Hermione gasped, one hand flying over her mouth in horror while the other succeeded in splashing Ginny in the face.
“Oh no!” she exclaimed. “The concert!”
Ron’s eyes widened and looked like they were about to pop out of his skull. “The concert was today?”
Hermione grabbed her bag and haphazardly began shoving her trinkets back inside. “I completely forgot— oh, Harry’s going to kill me.”
“Pretty sure that would be considered treason,” Ginny mused before blowing on the snarfblat once more. This time, it made an awful honking sound and Hermione reasoned that one had to train extensively on it in order for it to sound musical. Ginny blew on it again, sending more bits of seaweed careening through the air and Hermione snatched it back. She carefully tucked it back into her satchel, next to the dinglehopper, ignoring Ginny’s squawks of protest and outrage.
“Either way,” she said. “We should really get going.”
“Aw, alright,” Ginny said with a small pout. “Don’t go too long without visiting again, you hear?”
Hemione grinned. “I won’t. Who else would tell me such useful information about the human world?”
Ginny fluffed her feathers and nodded. “You have a point,” she replied. “Alright, now go, before Harry has a heart attack or something.”
“See you soon, Gin,” Hermione said, before diving back into the water. Her head immediately popped back out, not even a second later. “And thank you for everything!”
“‘Mione!” Ron called, from where he was a few feet below her. Hermione shrugged helplessly and glanced longingly at the land in the distance once more before diving below. Laughing, she easily overtook Ron, who was swimming as fast as he could, and blew him a playful kiss. She flicked her tail once more and arced over the edge of the sea bed into one of the many tunnels that lead to Atlantis.
“Seriously?!” Ron called in exasperation as the trail of bubbles between them grew larger. She slowed slightly and allowed him to catch up. He did little fins paddling frantically and eyes positively gleaming with murderous intent.
“Oh, come on, Ronald,” she said as she began swimming once more, at a slower pace. “Don’t be such a guppy.”
“You’re a guppy,” he shot back. “Besides, you know I can’t swim that fast.” She glanced at him, lips spreading into a wide grin. He immediately stopped and began to backpaddle, shaking his head.
“You’re absolutely right,” she said.
“Get that look off of your face right now,” he said, dodging her hand. “I can swim perfectly fine.”
“But Ron,” she said with a fake pout. “We’re late for the concert! Can you imagine how upset Harry is?”
“Harry will live,” he replied shortly, ducking under her arm and shooting down the tunnel. “Besides, you can just swim ahead if you’re that worried about it.”
“And leave you here with the sharks?” she asked innocently, coming up beside him.
His scales turned a strange shade of pale green. “Very funny, ‘Mione,” he said, valiantly trying not to let his voice shake. “There are no sharks here.”
Hermione hummed in reply and swam ahead, turning onto her back and brushing the roof of the tunnel with her fingers. “If you say so.”
They swam in silence for a few moments before Ron sighed in defeat. Hermione looked at him and felt her lips pull into a smirk at the look of grim acceptance on his face. She opened her arms and wiggled her fingers.
“Not a word,” he said, swimming into her arms and letting her octopus hug him.
“Of course not,” she said, turning back onto her stomach and eyeing the almost vertical dip in tunnel. He squirmed in her arms and she tightened her grip.
“And don’t let go!” he hastily added as she began to pick up speed.
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” she replied.
Ron opened his mouth to reply when Hermione shot forward and his words turned into a startled shriek that echoed through the tunnel, her laughter echoing along with it.
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