Gwen and Helen Stacy
Gwen always knew she was going to die young. And that was even before all this stupid multiverse stuff. After all, who outlives their own mother.
__
Most girls have mothers. Someone who is always there for them and loves them unconditionally. But all she has left of her mother is memories.
She always wished for more than just memories, though. Maybe that's why she sought out mother figures, from May to Jess. But no one can replace your mom. But what else is a girl supposed to do when your mom died when you were only six?
__
One of the things Gwen remembers about her mom was how loving she was. Helen Stacy was always kind, loving, there for Gwen, and the best hugger. She could use that right now. A long, loving hug. But no, she's here alone, with no place to really call home, longing for any piece of her mother.
She wondered why these memories were hitting her so hard today? Maybe it was the fact she needed her mom right now. She needed Helen's advice on what to do, how to fix everything, and how to find Miles. Most of all, she needed Helen's unconditional love and a nice long hug to cry her heart out into.
__
It didn't matter what day it was or how many times she said it. When Gwen got home, she would always run into her mother's arms and scream, "Mommy, mommy, guess what I did!"
But no matter how many times she said the exact same thing, Helen Stacy would still unfailingly scoop Gwen up and spin her around, saying, "Yes, baby? What happened today?" and then squeeze her so long until Gwen felt smothered with love.
It never bothered her, though. The smothering. She loved it so much. The way she could feel the way her mother loved her was by the hands wrapped around her.
Gwen got that from her mom. The clinginess, the way she wanted to squeeze people in a hug until she forgot all the problems she was dealing with and could only focus on how loved she felt.
__
Ballet was an escape. A way for her to keep her mind off of well… everything. But before that, it was a pure, undiluted love that had her starting to dance. Everything about it called to Gwen. When she spun, it felt like she was flying; when Gwen danced, it felt like she was in her own world. How did her love of ballet first blossom, though?
Her entire life, she grew up around ballet. It was her and her mom's thing. It started with every Friday night watching a ballet. Soon, Gwen became obsessed and begged her mom to play a ballet show or performance as much as she could, which Helen gladly obliged.
Most likely because Helen herself absolutely loved ballet. So much so that Helen had tried to be a professional ballerina. Helen used to practice from sunrise to sunset, but all her plans came undone when her leg was broken by some supervillain of the week.
Luckily, her leg had healed enough that Helen could still dance, but she had different plans now. She wanted to stop the supervillains who did this to her and wanted to make the world a safer place for her family.
This didn't stop Helen from still loving ballet, though. She would dance around the house all the time. The love of ballet was passed onto her daughter, too. Little Gwen would always try to copy her mom. One day, Gwen finally went up to Helen after they finished watching The Nutcracker; her lip trembled, and her eyes shook. She asked, "Mommy, can I do ballet?"
This is the part Gwen still remembers to this day. Her mom had a look in her eyes of such pride and love. Tears slipped out of her eyes, and Helen screeched. "Yes! Yes! Of course, darling! You're going to be the best ballerina ever!"
__
Maybe that's why, even after everything, she still does ballet. After all, she couldn't bring anything from home after everything with her dad, so ballet is the only thing she can hold onto and remember her mom with.
__
When you ask a kid what smell they associated their parent with, some kids will say fresh baked goods, flowers, or maybe even beer. Gwen would've wished for any of those rather than what she actually got. Instead, the only smell she can associate with her mom is the sharp tang of ammonia.
Gwen only remembers what their house smelled like after everything, never before.
It started some random day. Their house began to smell more and more like ammonia. One day, when Gwen came home, everything had been scrubbed spotless and pristine, but the one thing still crystal clear was the rancid stench of ammonia. It filled every one of her nostrils so much that she questioned how she was able to breathe.
Even to this day, Gwen can't smell ammonia without tearing up and remembering everything.
__
The ammonia wasn't the thing that bothered Gwen. No, what really bothered Gwen was that the stronger the ammonia seemed to get, the less her mom became her mom.
It started slow. When Gwen tried to run into her mom's arms after coming home, her mom didn't catch in to spin her anymore. Then, her mom didn't dance around the house anymore. Then, finally, she was in bed all the time instead of tucking Gwen in and saying she loved her.
Helen was always tired now. Gwen would try to lie in bed with her mom and tell her about her day, but her dad always seemed to cut their time short together more and more. "She needs her sleep," she would always tell her.
Gwen was optimistic that her mom would get better. But her mom got paler and thinner as the days passed, and Helen's hair kept falling out.
Gwen finally realized something was wrong when she tried to get into her mom's room and hug her mom. But her mom wasn't there anymore. Instead of the bright, full-of-life eyes that Gwen grew up around, she was staring at a pair of blank, emotionless eyes that didn't seem to recognize her.
After that, she couldn't stop crying. Her dad tried to comfort her by saying it would All get better soon. He was lying, though, and they both knew it. Gwen was a noisy little girl, and she noticed everything. From how her mom's smile failed to reach her eyes anymore, Helen hadn't left her bed in two weeks, and her dad wouldn't look her in the eyes when he said everything would be okay.
__
Gwen can't remember anything that happened before, only during and after.
__
She was in a car. Her dad's car, but it was early. Her dad never picked her up early. And her dad had tears falling down his face. He never cried. She got that from him.
It clicked to her then what had happened. Even though George hadn't said a word.
Gwen never really understood the concept of death as a child. All she knew was that there would no longer be any hugs when she got home from school. No mommy and daughter ballet days. And no more mom around who would love her unconditionally. Now, she was alone.
__
Would everything have been different if Helen had been around?
Maybe. Hopefully. Because then Gwen could've had the courage to stand up to Miguel. To be open with Miles. And to change all this stupid multiverse stuff.
__
She just hoped that maybe in another universe, she and her mom could have had a different ending.