Logan is sat on Wade’s, admittedly small, bed as he faces the wall. Logan’s mind is too busy wandering to focus on the sound of cheap game shows Blind Al is watching outside of the room or the sound of passing cars out the window. His hands are sweatily gripped around the ends of his roughed up flannel, a rather alarming look across his face as he stares off into space
Logan couldn’t stop replaying scenes and thoughts about Wade, the minute he’d try to get him off his mind he would just come up with more bullshit words to spew. The way Wade invited him to live with them, they way he made flirtatious remarks, at-least that’s the way Logan had to put it so it couldn’t mean anything, the fluttering in his stomach and the warm face he’d get when Wade stood a little too close or held him a few seconds too long. The shortness of breath he got when Wade would put a hand under his shirt or on his thigh to make a joke. He didn’t realize it but Logan seemed to be breathing aggressively and mumbling to himself as he thought about all of it. Drowning out the rest of the world around him, he didn’t realize when Wade had gotten home from walking Mary puppins and opened the door to their room.
Wade tossed Mary puppins leash to the ground and jumped onto the bed with his arms out to grab the older man. Logan’s heart rate sky rocketed as he regained his senses and whipped his head around at Wade. Realizing it was just the other man he grumbled and began pushing Wades arms off of him
“Get off of me Wade”
Logan huffed and pushed his forehead sweat back into his hair before turning over to face the other man and his dog
“Guh no need to be so moody people might mistake you to be Batman! We don’t want that now do we my little Honeybadger?”
Wade crawls back over to Wolverine and pokes at his abs as he call’s Logan the nickname, His honey badger? He scoffed and pulled away from Wade trying to touch him again, unsheathing his claws and shooting daggers at the other with his eyes. God the only way he could deal with this cancer ridden prick would be if he had something to drink, something he’s been craving for ages since Wade took him in. But after Wade saw how he was drinking during their ‘save the multiverse’ trip he’s been put on a probation, no alcohol drives him crazy.
Wade puts his hands up and scoots back, the bed springs creaking under the weight of the two muscular men
“Fine! Fine! You win this time! What’s up your ass today you feisty kitty cat”
The rugged faced man taking a very obvious look at Logan’s ass while making his comment
“You, clearly.”
Logan’s brows furrowed, rubbing his temples as he decided to stand up. The sudden weight change cause Wade to be sprung around the squeaky bed.
“Awh leaving the party so soon sugar bear? You didn’t even say hello to our special beauty in the room!”
Wade exclaims as he sits up, picking up Mary puppins from the ground and holding her out to Logan. He snickered and rolled his eyes as he gave the dog a pat before exiting the room to Wades dismay
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Logan just needed a breather, a little get away from everything a little longer. And by everything he meant Wade. His heart felt like a dagger constantly lingered in it when he was with the man. Maybe he was getting sick, was he having withdrawals from not drinking? That has to be right? Just some symptoms to Wade making sure he hadn’t been drinking.
He kept a tight grip on the flannel he displayed, one thing to keep him grounded. It reeked of dog, warmth, and Wade’s scent. Logan looked up at the sky, the sun had just started to set. His eyes sat on the horizon for more than a moment, imagining what it would be like if his roommate had joined him. It seemed he always longed for Wade when they were apart, wishing he could enjoy the moment with him. I mean that’s what all best friends do right? Roommates, friends. That’s all
Logan came back to his senses after his eyes had wandered around, locking onto the sign that read in big bold letters BAR a smirk crawled across his face as he began to cross the road over to the building dodging through the cars that passed in the street
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Logan finds himself sat up at the bar, a bottle rested in his hand as his upper body leans over the counter, his off hand rests under his own shirt running it over his shotty chest scars. Growling about it. He brings the bottle up to his mouth and pops it open with his teeth before taking a swig of it. He shivers as the cold unpleasant taste runs down his throat, he hates it but it’s safe, it’s routine, it’s a bad habit.
His breathing starts to slow again, being taken away by the alcohol, he puts the cold bottle up to his head and leans into it similarly how he did with the gun Wade had put to his head when they first met. Wade. God dammit Wade. His eyes shoot back open and he downs the bottle, requesting another from the man behind the bar. Logan digs in his pocket and tosses a handful of dollars on the counter before grabbing the bottle and walking out
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Logan is nearly done with the bottle by the time he gets back to their apartment, staring up and the building only lit by a few street lights. He didn’t realize how long he has stayed at the bar, did Wade care? Did he miss him? He shook his head and finished the bottle in another go before sloppily wiping his mouth and entering the building. His hands went back to his flannel, fucking with the collar as he started up the stairs.
Half way up the stairs, almost to their apartment, his eyes began to fog. Feeling the pressure and guilt from drinking again, his mind drifting off to image how Wade would react, is he going to be pissed? Would they start another argument? Even if it’s a common occurrence for them to argue, you could always tell it was a joke, but Wade never joked about Logan’s drinking problems.. He shook his head as he got up the stairs, standing in front of their appartements door. Logan wiped the tears from his eyes and pushed them back into his hair, face and down his neck// I wiped my tears on my face and neck and the backs of my ears And said, "Now it's sweat, now it's sweat, it's sweat now" // taking a deep breath before walking in
it was deafeningly quite which made Logan’s chest tighten more, his breath getting short. He just aimed to get to his shared room with Wade and go to bed, no confrontation, just silence. Besides the voices that lingered in his mind. He sighed making it to the door of their room, creaking it open.
Wade laid silently on their shared bed with Mary puppins at his feet. Logan entered the room and shut the door behind him before making his way over to the side of the bed that he claimed, he pushed his shoes off and tried to get in the bed. Wade taking up all the space he shoved him over, not realizing how hard he actually pushed the man. Logan scowled and put his head in his hands as he sat there for a moment just to breath
“Mmh where have you been peanut?”
a shiver ran up Logan’s spine as he lifted his head from his hands and glanced over at Wade, who had turned over an was sleepily looking over
“Just..went for a walk. Got some air, none of your fuckin business”
He could barely choose a response, all of them pouring out at once before he looked away again. Wade sat up a little more and scooted closer to Logan, getting a whiff full of alcohol and sadness
“I think it is my business when my little honey badger reeks of alcohol and..sorrow!”
Logans breathing got aggressive and rapid again, fuck he did smell like alcohol. He held himself close to the chest and looked away, his head pounding as he held back tears, teeth gritting.
”Cmon peanut I cant wait all night for a response!”
Wade shimmied closer to Logan, hearing him weep and dry heave he pulled him closer. Logan tried to push away Wade and wipe his face before the other man pulled him in. Wade brushed his scarred fingers through the wolverines hair, holding the man close to his chest while he weeped
The wolverine struggled to respond, the crying restricting him from putting words together
”im sorry wade I didn’t mean to. I I didn’t want to i wasn’t I was not going to I’m sorry”
”it’s alright wolvie, I don’t care just tell me what’s wrong”
a rush of tears flooded Logan’s eyes, he shut them tight and his hands gripped his flannel and he sobbed into Wade’s chest. The other man rubbed his back trying to help calm him. His heart rate was in the sky as Wade whispered affirmations in his ear, holding his head close and playing with his hair
”just promise to tell me in the morning okay? I love you Logan, your safe”
Logans face warmed up, butterflies tickling his stomach as Wade said those words. He nodded his head and pushed into Wades touch, purring softly as he started to calm down in the man’s arms. Wade smiled as he planted a kiss on Logan’s head before he closed his eyes as he got comfortable on the small twin mattress