dream of us in a year

“What do you think? Will she serve?”

“Well…”

Wade and Peter stared down at the charred remains of what had once been a promising lasagna and now looked like it’d been fucked by Johnny Storm. With the flame on.

“Why don’t I call and get us a pizza? Or I can go pick up some TJ’s just across the street! You love TJ’s!” Peter tried.

Wade sadly poked his lasagna.

Peter had been the first to arrive. Predictably punctual as always. Wade was glad for it, he needed his sugar bear in hard times like these. They’d gathered in the kitchen with Laura to decide the fate of their dinner. Peter took one more look at it and pulled out his phone to make the pizza call.

“I’m sorry, Wade.” Laura said yet again.

“It’s fine. But we need to work on your snooping skills. That was fucking amateur hour back there. If you’re gonna invade our privacy at least don’t get caught, mija.” Wade dumped a chunk of lasagna into Mary Puppins’ bowl. After a few sniffs, she too turned away. Wonderful. “Also, I thought you said you’d keep your nose out of my business. How about apologizing for that, huh?” Wade grabbed the pan and tipped the rest of the burnt food into the trash.

“I didn’t say anything about Logan’s business.” She technically hadn’t. But Laura wasn’t allowed to find loopholes, the cheeky bastard.

Laura unsheathed her claws to help him scrape the crusted bits into the trash.

“That’s like 20 fucking health code violations right there. Stop that.” Wade snapped, perhaps a little harsher than necessary. She was just trying to help, like always. Usually, Wade found it cute but he was on edge right now.

Not about the lasagna, although that was a tragic loss. He couldn’t stop thinking about what Logan had told him minutes ago. Somehow Logan blamed himself for the death of the X-Men in his universe, which was absolutely ridiculous in Wade’s opinion. If an entire school of superpowered beings couldn’t stop the people who had attacked them, it’s likely Logan wouldn’t have changed much even if he had been there. He might have even died with the rest of the X-Men. Adamantium bullet to the skull or whatever. Logan’s whole deal might be Not Dying but Wade had seen one very shiny skeleton proving it wasn’t impossible.

Then there was the way Logan had spoken to him. So softly it made him want to tear out the hair he didn’t even have. The way he’d held his hand, rubbed his thumb over Wade’s scars. Wade would sell his left nipple to know whatever Logan had been thinking at that moment. The not-so-nice voices in his head said Logan just thought it was disgusting. Maybe he was morbidly curious, like taking a second look at roadkill or poking at a dead frog. Some people liked to stare at the ugly but that didn’t mean they liked the ugly. Nobody liked his skin, nobody liked the way he looked, how could they?

Except Vanessa.

He just needed to talk to Vanessa. Then things could go back to normal and he’d stop feeling like Carl Wheezer lusting over Jimmy’s mom, if Jimmy’s mom was a huge half-metal man.

Wade shook his head to clear it (sometimes his brain worked like an etch-a-sketch) and refocused on Laura. Her face was aloof but he noticed how her eyes flicked to the empty pan.

Wade had accidentally ruined many a dinner as a kid in his excitement. Eventually, he’d learned he was a better help locked inside his room. His mom had agreed. Wade didn’t want Laura to feel that way.

He put his hands on her shoulders. “Listen, it’s not a big deal. I promise. I know you didn’t mean to. You probably did us all a favor, don’t tell Logan but I’m not the greatest cook in the world.” Wade gasped dramatically. “Insane, I know. But alas pizza is likely the best fate for us all.”

Laura rolled her eyes at him but nodded.

“Good.” Wade gave her a little pat on the head and quickly pulled his hand away before he lost it. He turned his voice into his very best Jim Carrey impression. “It’s party time now, Wolverina. P-a-r-t- why? Because I gotta!”

Wade strolled out of the kitchen and pretended he wasn’t hyper-aware of Logan sitting on the couch. Wasn’t hyper-aware of all the events that they’d been through the past few days. Soaring through relationship milestones like it was a fucking olympic sport.

He didn’t want to think about this anymore. His friends would all be here soon and his thoughts could disappear under jokes and stories and his own loud, loud voice. Wade liked to think he was at his best surrounded by people, or at least at his most sane. He only had to entertain them, listen to them, annoy them, and everything else could go silent just for a little while.

For once, the universe paid attention to him and there was a knock at the door. Wade could hear the cacophony of voices and laughter outside. Wade beamed, perfect timing, thank you cliches, and opened the door to welcome his family inside.

The small apartment was immediately filled with noise as several people squeezed in and said their hellos. Colossus dipped his head to fit under the door, followed by Eliie and Yukio hand in hand, Russell and Domino, and Dopinder in the rear.

“Wow, I didn’t know your taxi doubled as a clown car, babes. Who was sitting on who’s lap?” Wade said.

“There are no clowns in my car.” Dopinder frowned.

“And no sitting on laps.” Colossus clarified.

“Must’ve strapped you to the top like a chrome Christmas tree then.”

“We got here separately, genius.” Ellie said before quickly getting distracted by the tiny dog currently yapping her head off at the presence of so many new people. She crouched down and Wade tried not to laugh as Negasonic Teenage Warhead broke into a rare smile and scratched behind Mary’s ears. Dogpool working her magic once again.

“Not so emo with a little puppy around, huh?”

“Shut up.”

“Hi Wade!” Yukio spoke up, giving him a quick hug.

“Hi Yukio!” Wade couldn’t help the soft smile that always seemed to find its way onto his face when Yukio was around. “Make sure your girlfriend doesn’t steal my dog.”

“You didn’t tell us you’d gotten a dog! Shit, it’s like your twin, Wade!” Russell exclaimed, reaching out to pet Mary but instead getting a hand covered in slobber. He pulled his hand back with an expression of disgust.

Domino grimaced. “And we’re sure that’s a dog, right?”

“Like seventy percent sure! Maybe there’s some mole in there, some platypus, and a heaping of dog cancer. She might have been brought to Earth from The Green Planet to be honest. There’s a lot of new roommates around these parts nowadays.”

The talking died down all at once and in unison, the group looked around to where Logan was sitting, like none of them had actually expected him to be there. Several jaws dropped. Logan raised his hand in an awkward wave. Wade thought he was attempting a smile but he could’ve been just holding in a fart, it was kinda hard to tell.

“Logan, this is everyone. Everyone, this is Logan.”

Ellie groaned and pulled out her wallet to hand some cash to Russell, who was looking triumphant.

“I fucking knew you weren’t lying! Holy fucking shit!” Russell cheered, waving his twenty in the air.

Russell’s excitement seemed to break the tension and everyone crowded around Logan, eager to introduce themselves and get a good look at what to all of them was a renowned hero. Wade wished he had a camera to capture Logan’s bewildered face. Al was making no attempt to hide how she cackled at his misfortune. Wade considered stepping in and saving him but decided trial by fire was sometimes the best way to go.

Only Yukio and Laura stayed back next to him.

“Don’t want to crowd him too much. Must be hard getting all this attention.” Yukio told them while picking up Mary into her arms. “She’s so cute, Wade.” Yukio wrinkled her nose. “Might need a bath soon. What’s her name?”

“Mary Puppins Wilson, but her superhero name is Dogpool. And that’s just her natural musk, I don’t think it’s possible to get rid of. I’d probably have to peel her skin off which isn’t very nice.”

“Hmm. I could get her some dog perfume?”

“There’s no way that’s a fucking thing.”

“It is actually!”

“Jesus, people will spend money on anything. I need some immediately.”

They looked back at Logan who was attempting to decline Dopinder’s requests for an autograph.

“Did you believe me when I said he was here?” Wade asked.

“Of course I did. I trust you. And Laura talked about him a bit, she’s got no reason to lie. Els just likes to be contrary. That reminds me!” Yukio gently placed Mary on the floor to dig around her purse. The many keychains dangling from it made a satisfying tinkling noise. “I made you guys a little something.”

She pulled a small drawstring pouch out of her bag and handed it to Wade. Inside were two bracelets made of chord, one red and black, the other yellow and blue. They both had a little half-heart charm that could snap together to become a full heart. Wade thought his own little Grinch heart just grew three sizes.

“Yukio…” Wade sniffled. “Have I told you recently how much I love you?”

Yukio grinned. “You could mention it more.”

“There’s no way he’s wearing that.” Laura pointed out.

“Oh, he’s wearing it if I have to staple it to his wrist.” Wade put the yellow bracelet on and admired it. Yukio had always been crafty. He had quite a few of her various hobbies scattered around the apartment. Paintings, crochet, jewelry, she liked to gift him something whenever she started a new hobby, which was often. He put the other bracelet in his pocket to give to Logan later.

“And just to double check, these are friendship bracelets right? Or…” Yukio smiled and nudged him gently with her elbow. Laura hid her smile behind her hand.

“Yes, fuck. Do all teenage girls meddle this much or just you two?” Wade huffed.

“Awe, don’t get all grumpy about it.” Yukio linked her arm with his. “I was just asking. Laura told me a few things is all.”

Wade shot Laura a betrayed look.

“I didn’t say anything! Yukio just asked how you guys were and they were all curious so…” Laura tried to defend herself.

“I didn’t take you for a fucking gossip.” Wade sighed. “But I’m glad you’re talking to other children. You were getting a little too close to my teenage experience. A hermit with only old people and a rat for friends.”

“I’m sure you had more friends than that Wade, you’re always so nice.” Yukio said.

“Can I record you saying that for legal reasons? But no, sorry Yuki, I’m afraid I’m only this nice to you. Everyone else gets Regina George if she had a coke addiction and spent most of her time dressed as a sex toy.”

“Ex-coke addiction.” Yukio reminded him.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m clean as Fleetwood Mac in the 70s now.”

“Wade…”

There was another knock at the door and Wade’s heart fell to his knees. It had to be Vanessa. Suddenly inviting her felt stupid and immature. What was he thinking? Hi, I know we broke up but I saved the world can you pretty please take me back now? She wasn’t some prize he won for doing something good. But Vanessa was also his friend, his family, before anything else, and he wanted her here.

“Are you just gonna keep staring or should I open it?” Laura asked.

Wade snapped himself out of it and walked over to the door, with a quick glance at Logan. He was looking right at Wade, despite the people trying to talk to him. Wade did a stupid little two-finger salute towards Logan that he immediately cringed at himself for and opened the door.

It was Vanessa. Wade waited for the familiar feeling of being crushed that he always got when he saw her. It used to feel like 20-ton butterflies, like stepping outside to feel a breeze on your skin, like joy. But surprisingly, the feeling didn’t come. He was just happy to see her like he’d been happy to see all his other friends.

Wade leaned out of the door frame. “Hey.”

“Hi.” Vanessa replied, equally as eloquent. It was hard. To see someone again and say hello like you hadn’t shared a whole life and home together.

“I’m glad you’re okay. You had us worried for a bit.” She said.

“Yeah, sorry about that. But I’m always okay! It’s technically the only state I can be. I’m glad you’re okay too. No mortal peril for you in this movie, thankfully! No fridging either but we still haven’t passed the fucking bechdel test in these things. This fanfic hasn’t even passed the bechdel test, god what a shitty author. We should-“

“Hi Vanessa!” Yukio saved them all from his rambling like the angel she was.

Wade moved over to let Vanessa through and into the apartment. Yukio immediately jumped to give her a hug as the others shouted from their places across the apartment.

Vanessa’s hair was so long now. Wade wondered if she’d ever cut it again. He thought it looked nice both ways. He remembered so long ago how she used to say she’d cut it when they started a family. A fresh start to celebrate. But they hadn’t gotten that far so she’d never cut it.

Wade shook himself out of those thoughts before they got any more depressing.

“Ness, there’s someone I’d like you to meet.” Wade gestured aggressively at Logan to come over. Logan rolled his eyes but stood up with a groan, the fucking grandpa.

Vanessa eyed Wade as Logan walked over. She had that face she always has when she’s thinking 50 steps ahead of him, which made Wade nervous.

“This is Logan. I got him to replace Blind Al. Don’t tell her I said that.”

“Hi.” Logan offered, very obviously awkward in his new role of semi-willingly socializing with people. Looking at him, with his too-new flannel and slightly standoffish expression, Wade couldn’t help feeling a wave of cuteness aggression along with a stab of pity. He had never really bothered asking Logan if he had actually wanted to meet all these people. Wade had just been so excited at the prospect of inserting Logan into his F-Word that they hadn’t set up a safe word.

“It’s nice to meet you, Logan. I’m Vanessa. I’m glad Althea’s got some company now other than Wade.” Vanessa remarked.

“He’s not so bad.” Logan grumbled. Was he… defending him?

“No, he’s not.” Vanessa smiled at Wade fondly, which felt nice until “But he’s not the easiest to live with. Does he still steal all the blankets in his sleep?

The corner of Logan’s mouth twitched. “Unfortunately. I got my own blanket but-”

“He steals that too.” Vanessa finished with an all too-knowing smirk. Wade had the feeling she’d gotten more information out of that short conversation than Logan had intended to give.

“You want a drink?” Logan offered, gruffer than could be considered polite but the attempt was there.

Vanessa nodded and Logan managed his escape to the kitchen for some beer. As soon as he was gone, Vanessa punched Wade’s arm lightly and smiled triumphantly. “So, you disappear and come back with someone to sleep with? Tell me more about that.”

“He snores like a bear and he doesn’t even need those blankets he’s like a fucking furnace. Also, stop weaseling information from him, I know what you’re doing and there’s nothing to weasel.”

“Oh. So you’re not?” There was no need to clarify what she was asking.

“Nope.”

“Interesting.” Vanessa paused to think this through. “He seems a little familiar. Have I seen him before?”

“Um, he’s The Wolverine. Were you not paying attention?”

“No, I know that. I mean like personally familiar, like I’ve seen his face before or some- Oh my god! You! You stapled his face to yours once!”

“I have no idea what you're talking about.”

“When I first took your mask off you had a paper cutout of his face stapled to yours! Holy shit.” She laughed.

“I think you’re imagining things.” Wade put the back of his hand against her forehead. “Are you feeling okay?”

“So let me get this straight.” Vanessa put a hand to her hip and Wade fought the urge to gulp like a cartoon character that just got caught being naughty. “You’re sleeping in the same bed with a man whose face you’ve stapled to yours, who you have several pairs of underwear themed after, who I’m pretty sure you once had a tumblr devoted to, and you’re just completely chill about this?”

Maybe having someone over who knew everything about him hadn’t been his best idea. “Keep your fucking voice down!” Wade peeked over her shoulder to check Logan was still in the kitchen. If Wade was lucky his introverted hiding would last a few more minutes. Yukio had dragged Laura off to talk with the other teens.

“He doesn’t need to know about my minor past obsession with him because I am in fact completely chill about this.” Wade said.

Vanessa raised a perfect eyebrow.

“Like fifty percent chill about this. I do fangirl at times but I’ve shown remarkable restraint, you should be proud of me.”

“And he’s here of his own free will. No kidnapping right?” Vanessa teased.

“He’s not a child so it’s actually known as abduction, get it right.”

Vanessa laughed again and Wade was secretly thrilled. They hadn’t been able to talk this comfortably in what felt like forever. Most conversations they’d had since separating were stilted awkward things. He’d missed their rapport so much.

Wade was eager to continue but a shout from the living room interrupted him.

“You excited her too much. I told you you needed to relax.” Laura was saying.

“How is this my fault? It’s her bladder!” Russell shouted back.

“It’s your fault because I told you it would happen!”

“Well it’s basically your dog, maybe you should potty train her!”

“What?”

There was a yellow puddle before them. The prime suspect was wagging her tail without a care in the world. Ellie was kneeled in front of Yukio helping her remove one of her sparkly boots that was now damper than before.

“Guys, it’s okay. It’s not that big of a deal.” Yukio said while trying really hard not to look disgusted. “I can just clean it up!”

“No, I’ve got it.” “No way, I’ll do it.” Laura and Russell spoke in unison and then glared at each other.

“I think that’s your cue.” Vanessa patted him on the back and abandoned him to talk with Althea.

Wade sighed. So much for a non-awkward conversation. “Hold on you fucking heathens.” He shouted at the kids and started his walk of shame to the cleaning supplies.

But Logan was already walking past him, supplies in hand. “I heard them.” He grumbled as he passed.

“God, aren’t competent men so sexy?” Wade asked the world at large and followed to help.

Laura and Russell, despite their bold declarations of cleaning, were all too happy to let Wade and Logan take care of it and went to help Yukio salvage her boot. Which left the two men crouched behind the couch, relatively hidden from sight.

“Hey.” Wade said as they wiped.

“Hey.” Logan’s face was hard to read and Wade found himself wishing he could read minds.

“Come here often?”

“Only you could flirt over a puddle of piss.”

“It’s a gift.”

“You could probably flirt with a puddle of piss.”

“Hey, I stick to sentient beings, thanks.”

Logan shook his head and continued cleaning. It wasn’t so bad. When your job involved dead bodies you got used to awful messes, dog pee was practically saintly in comparison.

“Hey…” Wade struggled with what he wanted to get out for a moment. “If you didn’t want this, you would tell me right?”

Logan wrinkled his nose. “I don’t want to be cleaning piss, no.”

“No, I mean this.” Wade moved his head in the direction of everyone else. “I don’t think I asked if you wanted to…” He hesitated on how to continue that sentence. Meet everyone I love? Be part of my family? Everything seemed a bit too big emotionally so he settled for “Meet even more lunatics. Three was probably enough.”

Logan rolled his eyes. “Trust me, bub. If I didn’t want to be here, I wouldn’t be.”

“Oh.” Wade said. That word seemed to be turning into the full extent of his vocabulary these days.

Wade tried to accept this, he really did. But he just didn’t get it. He couldn’t understand why Logan was still around, why he was here cleaning dog pee with him. Doing laundry and tax evasion with Wade Wilson instead of being literally anywhere else. The same way he didn’t understand why Vanessa came back every time he asked, despite their break up, or why all these X-Men continued to visit him, even though he knew he annoyed the shit out of them. He was elated of course, but he couldn’t shake off the confusion when someone chose him against all reason.

Wade felt his face heat up. Now would be a great time to say something clever and heart-warming that reflected the same degree of affection without revealing too much. Readers, Wade was going to rizz him up as the kids say. “You’re ass is so fat I’m gonna kill myself.” was what came out of his mouth. Nailed it.

Logan seemed to age another hundred right before his eyes.

“That’s so sweet.” Someone said from the couch. Wade’s head whipped up to see Dopinder leaning over the couch watching them with a bowl of popcorn in hand. Wade didn’t even know they had popcorn.

“Does no one know what privacy means in this house?” Wade complained.

Domino popped up next to Dopinder and stole a popcorn to toss at Wade’s head. “Nope.”

Wade caught the popcorn from the air and threw it back at her but she easily caught it in her mouth.

Post-piss-incident Wade spent much of his time regaling the others with the tale of how he saved the world and managed to bag Mr. Australia in one fell swoop. It was a fun distraction from the looming conversation he still wanted to have with Vanessa. Sort of still wanted to have. Wade was never one for talking about feelings. He’d perform his displays of whatever emotion he thought the funniest but the real thing was for people much braver than he was. That had been a big reason behind their break up. Wade had been falling apart after Vanessa had died, then undied. They both had. It wasn’t every day you woke up to find your boyfriend sobbing over you explaining that you’d literally died because of him but he’d gone back in time to save you.

He’d considered never telling Vanessa about her death. But in the end, he just couldn’t manage it, it felt horrific to keep it from her, the danger he’d put her in and the danger she was still in. Not to mention she could tell something was off about him right away. That was all Wade could feel after he’d gone back in time. Off. He’d fixed everything, saved everyone, but for a long time he saw their deaths every time he looked at them. Especially Vanessa’s.

He might have been honest with her about what happened but he was never honest about how he felt about it. It all just rotted inside him.

Wade wanted to do better. He wanted to open up to her. Better late than never, right? But that seemed about as easy as teaching Dogpool to roll a joint. He knew what to say in every possible situation except in those where he was meant to share his icky sticky inside thoughts. He made fun of Logan for his tough-it-out-don't-talk-it-out mentality but at least when it came down to it Logan was always honest. He didn’t dance around the truth of how he felt like Wade did. Did he tell her that he still loved her or that he was finally moving on? Did he tell her how scared he was of losing her, of losing anyone? Wade didn’t know yet.

So instead he told Domino and Dopinder how he’d left his birthday party and gotten thrown into a masquerade ball in another dimension that he needed to leave before midnight or his new suit would melt right off his body and he had left in such a rush that he forgot one of his katanas which Logan found and kindly returned to him. And he told Colossus and Ellie how he’d been found by a secret time-travel organization that sent him on a quest to kill his long-lost daughter named Jobu Tupaki before she destroyed the multiverse and he’d dragged Logan out of an animated universe which is why he looks so perpetually confused, he’s not to a 3D world yet, you see. He told Yukio and Russell he’d been abducted by aliens that wanted to purchase the earth as real estate but he convinced them mosquitoes were a super rare endangered species that could not be tampered with so the planet had been spared. He may have insinuated Logan was an alien with that last one.

At first, Logan followed him around grumbling and correcting the bullshit he was spewing but much to Wade’s excitement he eventually gave up.

“There’s no way that’s what happened.” Russell said.

“It does seem a little improbable.” Yukio added.

“I’d say it’s extremely probable. Statistically how many superhero movies include aliens? It’s one of the most basic villains.”

“Yeah but you’re just fucking with us, I can tell.” Russell argued.

“Are you calling me a liar?”

“Well, I ain’t calling you a truther.”

“Don’t attack me with a reference from a show I made you watch!”

Russell turned to Logan, who was eyeing them with a long-suffering look usually reserved for the parents of two-year-olds or the spouses of Karens.

“Sir, are you or are you not from another planet?” Russell asked.

Logan sighed and took a long drink from his beer (his second of the night, Wade was counting.)

“No comment.”

Russell and Yukio’s eyes widened and Wade fought the urge to start jumping up and down. Before he could continue duping the suckers, Peter shouted from the doorway, balancing a tall stack of pizza boxes in the way only a man whose superpower is mundane shit could do. “Pizza’s here!”

“Let’s go!” Russell shouted, running off to help Peter with the boxes. Yukio followed to clear the dining table of junk.

“Gen Z and their gerbil attention spans.” Wade sighed, patting Logan on the shoulder. “We’ll get ‘em next time, Spock.

Logan huffed. “Think I’m more of a McCoy.”

“Awe so you’re not completely uncultured? You’re right but Bones isn’t a hot alien. I’m waiting for you to go full Pon Farr.”

“Gross.”

“Please let me be the Kirk in your Spirk, baby boy.”

“I’m walking away now.”

“We can recreate Amok Time!” Wade called to Logan’s back as he walked away.

The pizza was good. Not as good as Wade was sure his lasagna would have turned out, but no use fretting about the past. Better than the pizza however was Wade’s view of his friends and family, old and new. He could practically hear the Aretha Franklin playing. Wade took a moment to appreciate it, as he fed Mary bits of pizza on his lap.

He’d come so close to losing this. This feeling of home and safety and somehow, against all odds, the feeling of being loved and having people to love. Watching Ellie and Yukio lean against each other, Dopinder and Domino fighting over the last slice of pepperoni, Colossus eating the crusts Russell tore off his pizza, Logan and Laura with such rare smiles on their faces, Al gossiping with Peter and Vanessa. He took it all in. It was such cheesy bullshit to feel this way. And yet… he couldn’t pretend anything else was more important anymore.

It was nice to see Vanessa laughing so freely again. In the long months before they’d broken up, it had been such a rare sound, no matter how hard he tried.

A tap on his shoulder pulled Wade from his thoughts. “Give me the fucking dog. Talk to the girl.” Wade’s mind blanked as Logan pulled Mary from his arms and turned away pointedly. Well, that was… straightforward. No way of misinterpreting that. Wade obediently faced Vanessa with an awkward smile.

“Oh, hi.” She said.

“Hi.”

“You’ve been busy.”

He had. The past few days had felt like years. The words spilled out of his mouth before he could tear them apart too much.

“I did it for you.” He said. “And even if you don’t want me, I… I did it for you.”

Vanessa put her hand over his own. Wade smiled but couldn’t help remembering the times Logan had done the same thing. Her hand was much smaller. A rush of confusing emotions hit him. Fuck, he was a filthy cheater. No, wait… that didn’t make sense. He was so horrendously single he could probably make Fleabag feel bad for him. He was seriously losing it.

“We should talk, I think.” Vanessa told him.

“Yeah… We probably should.”

After eating, Vanessa and Wade excused themselves to talk in the hallway.

“Have fun, you two.” Russell said before Ellie elbowed him quiet. Logan was talking to Laura, facing away from Wade. He tried not to let that hurt.

Wade found himself in the dingy hallway outside his apartment for the second time that day. Vanessa stared at him. He tried not to cower away at the intensity of it. Surely he was going to get yelled at, surely he should be running away right now. Vanessa came towards him quickly, only to wrap her arms around him in a hug. She had to go on her tippy toes to reach.

“Are you okay?”

Wade made a valiant effort not to fall apart in her arms. He missed her so much.

“I don’t know.” He whispered. “I think I’m still in love with you?”

“Oh, Wade.” Vanessa backed away but kept her hands on his arms, so he couldn’t turn away. “You’re not.”

“How do you know?” Wade breathed.

“Because I know you. Better than anyone. And there was a question mark at the end of that sentence.”

“But, maybe we can try again. Give it another shot. You wanted me to do something bigger than myself and now I have. I saved the world. What more could I possibly do?”

“It was never about that, and you know it.”

“Then what was it fucking about?”

He didn’t know why he was even asking. She’d explained it to him multiple times, always kindly, always gently. He’d been so different after traveling through time. He was never present. Vanessa had been suffering too, slipping right through his fingers and he’d been so caught up in his own pain he hadn’t even noticed hers. She’d tried so hard to meet him halfway and he just couldn’t do it. They never scheduled the wedding, they never talked again about starting a family, they never went out on dates. They’d both died the night those men had crashed through their door and for a long time they were just ghosts haunting the same home. Until finally, it had ended.

“I don’t wanna rehash the whole thing, please just… I want to help you. Tell me how to help you.” She said.

Wade forced in a breath. He wasn’t going to be an asshole to Vanessa. He was never doing that again. “I want to be friends. I don’t think I really want to get back together… I don’t.” He hesitated. “I’m just not sure who Wade is without Ness.”

Vanessa smiled crookedly and her eyes were starting to shine. “I didn’t know who Ness was without Wade either. Not for a long time.”

“What did you do?”

“I lived. I went out with my friends, my family. I danced. I started my book, the one I always wanted to write.”

Wade felt his own eyes watering. “The one with the sirens?”

“You remember?” She seemed so surprised.

“Of course. You’re my best fucking friend. Why would I forget?”

They were both crying now and Wade gave up on his facade. Just for a moment, he didn’t need to be Deadpool.

“I am proud of you, you know? For saving the world. Of course, I fucking am. But I’m sorry if I made you feel like you needed to be some great hero for me to… I don’t know.” She faltered.

“I’m sorry too. For everything.” He couldn't even begin to name all the things he needed to apologize to her for. The self-hatred threatened to drown him for a moment.

“Hey, none of that.” Vanessa brushed a tear from his cheek.

“Ugh, I know. I’m gonna ruin my mascara.”

“Fuck, don’t remind me.” She wiped under her eyes. “Mine’s supposed to be waterproof.”

She leaned against him again and for a moment they just held each other up.

“I’m glad you’re doing well Ness.” Wade thought back to the last few days with Logan and Laura, and to how content he’d felt just looking at his family earlier. “I think I am too. Or I will be.”

“Good.”

“How’s Derpman?”

Vanessa backed away, rolling her eyes fondly. “Dermot. And he’s good. Really good.”

“I wanna meet him. Do some light life-threatening.”

“I think you’ll find him hard to dislike.”

“I don’t know about that. I’m pretty good at not liking people.”

“Hmm. Well, I guess it’s only fair.” Vanessa smirked. “Since I met Logan.”

“Hold your fucking horses and put them back in the stable, girl.”

“Is he good to you?”

Wade thought about it. Of course he was, he’d saved his life. But beyond that, Logan seemed to really care about him now. Which was a better feeling than any drug.

“Yeah, he is. His boobs are big but his heart is bigger.” Wade answered wisely.

Vanessa giggled. “Well then, you better make a move before Al does.”

“Bitch, what?”

“She told me his voice was sexy. And that you two needed to bone before she took drastic measures. Don’t be surprised if you find yourself locked in a room with him soon.”

Wade groaned. “I swear her and Laura will be the fucking death of me.”

“Awe, poor thing.” She squeezed his hand one last time. “Let’s get back inside.”

Wade felt like a weight lifted from his chest as they went through the door. Things weren’t perfect by any means and maybe it’d take a while longer for all the awkwardness to clear but this was better. He hadn’t lost Vanessa completely. He supposed crying paid off occasionally.

Back in the apartment, Peter was explaining to the kids how to hook up the busted old Wii to the TV. They probably knew exactly how to do it but they seemed to be humoring him, bless their hearts. Wade’s eyes scanned the room almost automatically for Logan. He was by the kitchen talking with Colossus. The smile on his face was gone, replaced with the much more familiar tenant of a frown.

Vanessa went off in the direction of the bathroom, leaving Wade on his own. On one hand, he should go check on Logan, but he’d just remembered he’d completely forgotten to tell him about Colossus’ invitation to the X-Men, and judging by the pinched look on the man’s metal face, Colossus was finding that out too. He’d just been so busy and what if Logan decided to accept? Would that mean he was going to leave? He’d only just got here.

Destroying the younglings and Peter at Just Dance sounded way more enjoyable than interrupting that conversation.

Logan caught him looking and did a double-take. His frown darkened and he immediately came to Wade, leaving poor Colossus mid-sentence.

“What happened?” Logan practically growled.

“What do you mean what happened? You’re the one stomping over here at your big age-”

“You’re face, you- Have you been crying?” If Logan had meant to sound anything but angry about this he was failing miserably.

“No, I just had fluff in my contacts. You Wolverines shed like crazy.”

“Wade.” Logan grabbed his arm. “Did Vanessa make you cry?”

Wade couldn’t help it. He burst out laughing. The show of protectiveness was such a far cry from how Logan had treated him when they first met it was hilarious. What kind of witchcraft had he performed on this man to get him like this?

“Wade.” Logan growled.

“No, Wolvie.” Wade continued to chuckle. “No need to maul anyone tonight. Things just got a bit sappy is all. You know me, huge sap.”

Logan did not look convinced. “So…” He cleared his throat. “The talk went well?”

Wade smiled, this he could be honest about. “Yeah, it did. It went really well.”

Was it Wade’s overactive imagination or did Logan look disappointed?

“Wade!” Yukio called from the couch. “Do you wanna play?”

“Give me a second, Yuki.” Wade shouted back.

“I would like to play!” Colossus said delightedly and bounded past them. Wade grimaced. There go his floorboards.

Wade turned back to Logan but whatever look he had thought he’d seen was gone.

“What were you talking to the big guy about?” He asked.

“Asking about the Friends of Humanity.” Logan took a drink from his beer, as if to wash the name from his mouth.

“And? What did he say?”

Logan sighed. “Same thing you did. They’ve fallen apart and Creed is in jail.”

“See? You gotta trust your buddy, sometimes I know what I’m talking about.”

“He also said some stuff about going up to stay at the mansion. I had to turn him down.”

Wade knew grinning at him wasn’t the appropriate response but oh well. “You don’t say? Mi casa es tu casa, Honey Badger.”

“Why didn’t you mention he’d invited me to join the X-Men? He said he’d told you.”

Fuck. “Would you believe me if I said I forgot?”

“No.”

Too bad. Wade had done enough facing his feelings for one day. “Welp, I did forget. Probably the undiagnosed ADHD you so graciously pointed out. Wanna dance?”

“I don’t dance.” He grumbled.

“Wade!” Ellie yelled. “Last chance.”

“Okay, okay! I’m going!” Wade hurriedly pulled the red and black bracelet out of his pocket. “This is for you. A token of our developing BFFness.” Wade pushed the bracelet into his hands and wiggled his own wrist in Logan’s face. “I have a matching one, see?”

“Wadeeeee!” Russell screeched.

“Well, duty calls. Enjoy my professional dance double’s moves.”

Wade ran in front of the TV just as they were about to start. He snatched the Wii remote from Ellie’s waiting hand. “I better be the fruit hat girl.”₁

Ellie rolled her eyes. “I knew you’d throw a tantrum if you weren’t.”

Wade beamed as the familiar calypso music started. He could do this with his eyes closed. The 12-year-old crush part of him hoped Logan was watching.

(He was.)

After thoroughly thrashing everyone in several rounds of Just Dance, Wade had been banned from playing. He busied himself with offering cookies to everyone, that had thankfully been saved from the oven massacre. He also maybe tried to sabotage the others playing as sweet revenge for getting kicked out. In return, Yukio politely asked Vanessa to play against Wade, which of course resulted in him getting his ass handed to him.

Once Al started yawning obnoxiously, Wade’s family took her hint and trickled out until only Dopinder was left and he too was not-so-discretely nudged out the door by Logan. Introverted roommates really put a limit on Wade’s party time.

Vanessa had left with the plan that they’d start going back to their yoga classes together. Wade had made her pinky promise.

After they were all gone, Wade and Logan cleaned up a bit before giving up and getting ready for bed. Al was already tucked away in her room.

“I’m missing a Wii foreskin, have you seen it? Fucking kids these days don’t know how to clean up after themselves.” Wade was scanning the floor with his toothbrush hanging out of his mouth.

“I don’t know what the fuck that is and you’re getting drool on the carpet.” Logan pushed him back into the bathroom and closed the door.

Wade spit in the sink and shouted. “It’s the condom thing that goes over the Wii remote so it doesn’t slip out your hand and kill someone.”

Logan was silent outside the bathroom. When Wade finished and opened the door he was waiting, Wii condom in hand. “Mary was using it as a chew toy.”

“Whoopsies. Good dose of microplastics for the baby.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

Logan shuffled around as Wade sat down on the bed. Wade loved to watch him at night. Not in a creepy way even though that sounded stalker levels of creepy, but he liked seeing how comfortable Logan was getting here. Plopping Mary on her armchair, turning off the lighting in the kitchen, messing with the thermostat.

Logan talked to Wade while he fidgeted with everything to his liking.

“So, um. How’d you learn to dance like that?” He grumbled.

“Ooo, well I think Vanessa has to take most of the credit for that. I’ve always loved it and trust me Peanut I have a natural talent, but it was only with her I started really fucking getting into it. Before that, the internalized homophobia, military masculinity combo was stopping me from my Kevin Bacon dreams.”

Wade thought he heard Logan grunt in response. He picked up his Kirby plush and squeezed it.

“If it weren’t for her I’d probably be a sad little church fanatic, no dancing and a closet made of glass until the day they put me in the grave and sent me on my way to straight heaven. She was the first one to realize all my jokes about boy kissing weren’t joking all that much and didn’t have a problem with it. But whatever, I’m word-vomiting like a drunk girl in the club bathroom. I know you don’t wanna hear this so feel free to stab me a couple times.”

“I do wanna hear it. I asked didn’t I?” Logan approached the bed and laid out his blanket. But not before giving him this look. It was a look Wade wasn’t sure he understood. But he wished he could lay down and soak it in like a lizard on a rock.

“Why are you being so nice to me?” Wade asked nonchalantly as if he wasn’t dying and screaming and rolling around on the floor to know.

Logan shrugged. “You let me live here, don’t you?”

Oh. Right.

Wade looked away as his stomach sank. He was such a fucking idiot. Logan only treated him like this because he needed a place to stay. It made sense, more sense than whatever daydreams he was having. Of course, Logan didn’t actually like him, how fucking could he?

“Right. Can’t be mean to the landlord.” Wade said, his tone completely different than when he’d begun speaking.

Logan spluttered. “That’s not what I fucking meant.”

“No, it’s fine. Well, you can stop kissing my ass, I’m not gonna raise your prices.” He laid down with his back to Logan and wrapped himself in blankets with so much force he nearly punched himself in the face.

“Now wait a damn minute.”

“I said it’s fine! Rents due on Saturday and I’m not fixing the leaky faucet. Good night.”

“Wade stop. I’m trying to-“

Wade squeezed his eyes shut. “Sorry, I’m sleeping. I can’t hear you, I’m having my M Sandwich dream. That’s when Megan Fox and Michael B. Jordan are the bread and I’m-“

“Jesus Christ, will you-“

“Nope! La la la la la. I can’t hear you. La la la la.”

Logan growled and crawled into bed, the futon sinking and squawking in complaint. “You’re a fucking child.”

“La la la la la.”

Logan grumbled and Wade waited for a literal stab in his back. Logan however only got comfortable with the same level of aggression as Wade had, punching the pillow into squishy submission. The bed was starting to sway and emit a series of concerning screeches.

“Hey, fucking stop that. Last time I checked this isn’t supposed to be a water bed.” Wade snapped.

“Oh, now you wanna talk like adults? Too late for that, bub.” Wade felt the bed shake some more until Logan finally settled down. The futon seemed to settle down too.

For about two whole seconds before a loud screeeeeekkk whistled from underneath them. Wade felt his ass clench in fear.

Then the bed gave up on them entirely and slammed to the floor with a CRASH. It had fought valiantly against the roughly 400 pounds of combined muscle for a week now. But no longer.

The room was silent as they both stared at the ceiling (which was now a good two feet further away) in shock.

It started with Wade giggling, then laughing, then practically howling as he clutched his sides.

“It’s not funny!” Logan protested before he too began to chuckle, which only set Wade off more. He was practically crying now and rolled over to look at Logan, whose cheeks were slightly red, and was clearly fighting for his life trying to keep his laugh under control. The sight of that made Wade lose it completely.

There was loud banging from the wall between them and Althea, accompanied by a string of profanity that could put Chris Evans to shame.

Wade and Logan tried to settle down but every time they caught a glance at each other they just lost it all over again. It took several minutes and many more muffled expletives from Al before they finally stopped laughing.

Wade wiped at his tears. “Guess I really am a power bottom at rock bottom now.”

He peeked at Logan, who hadn’t quite managed to strip the smile off his face. God, he was so fucking beautiful like this it was unfair. Wade’s heart stuttered at the sight of the Deadpool bracelet securely on Logan’s wrist. Perhaps he’d been hasty in resigning himself to the role of landlord. The silence stretched out between them.

“I’m nice to you because you’re my friend.” Logan declared and then turned away with a swish of blanket like pajama Batman. Wade had a feeling he wouldn’t get another word out of him all night.

Wade’s chest did a weird flip-flop as he absorbed this declaration.

Friends. That was not a small thing when it came from the very mouth of The Wolverine. It was more than he ever thought he could have with Logan Howlett. And he could see it. Their life as friends, taking ass and kicking names. Possibly cuddling every once in a while in a totally friendly manner. It was everything he’d ever wanted, the stuff of fanboy wet dreams.

Wade Wilson could keep things casual. And if he wanted to keep Logan in his life, which he did want, more than he’d ever wanted anything, then he would have to.

“Oh, Kirby, we’re really in it now.” He whispered.

Kirby, unfortunately, had no nuggets of wisdom to offer him.