Elevated

Nora was thrilled to be back in their lab on the ninetieth floor. She spent the first hour of her day inspecting equipment and excitedly chatting to Luna about how cool it all was. She flipped on a half-dozen new machines to take readings she didn’t need, just because she could. It was like coming home after a long vacation and finally getting to relax.

Of course, Tony had apparently purchased two dozen tablet pens and the boxes filled the entire drawer of her desk. It was a three-thousand-dollar joke and Nora immediately began wondering how she could get back into his lab to mess with him in return. A small part of her did also appreciate it in a genuine way. She’d lost three under the servers in the corner of the lab before it had been blown all to hell.

Bruce, when he arrived later than usual, hovered in the doorway. He let his eyes sweep over all the new equipment and cleaned his glasses on his shirt. Nora was half-convinced it wasn’t him at all that had entered the lab, he was quiet for so long. She was concerned someone was about to corner her again about something weird. When she turned and saw the obvious nerves in his posture, she leapt up from her chair and demanded that he come look at their new micro-collider. She couldn’t think of a single reason they’d use it, and it had probably cost a small fortune, but she was excited anyways. Bruce relaxed a little bit.

They had managed, in Tony’s lab, to recreate the findings from Bruce’s original idea all those months ago. What remained, unfortunately, was compiling them all into a publishable paper. It required a lot of laying out tables of data and sifting through them for the numbers that aligned to prove each fact. Then taking those facts and writing them in the most boring possible way. Nora was good at it, but by the time Bucky stepped into the lab at noon she was more than ready for a break and a coffee.

She didn’t remember until they were in the elevator, Bucky’s comment in the lounge. Her face heated instantly. She was positive she was blushing and glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. He was bent a little at the waist petting Luna. If he noticed, he didn’t say anything. It wasn’t an overly comforting thought. Bucky said very little and noticed an awful lot.

She didn’t remember to say anything herself, until they were halfway to the Spruce, “Hey, what movie did you guys watch on Friday?” Nora was pretty sure Thor had told Darcy he’d invited Steve and Bucky to watch something, and that Darcy had gotten her up there as some sort of trap. She’d been too smug for the situation to be a coincidence.

“Alien,” he answered.

“Really? What did you think of it?” Nora knew he liked movies about space, but she wasn’t sure how he’d feel about a giant man-eating alien.

“Was okay.” Nora clicked her tongue, filing away his response. It was surprisingly enthusiastic, she thought, “How was Plato’s?”

Nora was so surprised she tripped over her own feet. Bucky’s hand shot out and grabbed her arm to keep her from sprawling, “Oh, shoot.” He let her go just as quickly, “Thanks Bucky.” She glanced at him, the same unreadable expression on his face as always. He listened to her talk a lot and asked sometimes how she was in the clipped way he had, but he’d never asked her such a pointed kind of question. She was surprised he remembered the name of the bar at all, “Uh, it was fine. Lots of people that work around here go there so lots of suits. I wasn’t really dressed for it.” Bucky made a noise that she really didn’t know what to make of, so she continued, “We had a lot of fun though. We took bets on which guys would be brave enough to ask for Natasha’s phone number. Turns out it was none of them.”

Bucky didn’t say anything to that but they’d reached the Spruce so she asked, “Know what you want?”

“Caramel,” he answered. He came in with her about half the time but he was moving to sit in his usual chair on the patio, so Nora went in to order on her own. She got a vanilla latte for herself in a size up from usual because she was feeling a little scrambled and could only attribute it to the paper her and Bruce were putting together.

When she made it back out onto the patio, Bucky didn’t stand so she crossed the patio to him instead, “You wanna stay for a bit?”

He nodded. Nora passed him his drink and sat on the opposite side of the little table. From her seat, she could see into the coffee shop. She sipped her drink and watched the baristas steam milk.

“Nora?”

“Mhm?” He looked at her, then over her shoulder, his eyes darting across the noon traffic she knew must be there. He reached out and pulled the chair on his left out from the table. His too-blue gaze cut from her face to the chair. Nora frowned. She didn’t really get why he wanted her to move but she stood up anyways and rounded the table to sit beside him. Luna, who sat at Bucky’s knee, sniffed her pants with interest. Nora patted her.

They sat for a little while in silence. It was colder out than Nora would’ve liked but she’d remembered a hat and mittens, so she felt okay. She sipped her latte and didn’t put it down on the table, letting it warm her hands through the yarn instead.

“Nora?”

Nora looked at Bucky. He wasn’t looking at her this time. He had his left hand on the table between them, palm down, and was looking at it instead. “Yeah?” He was talking way more than he usually did and totally unprompted. She wondered what had changed. He definitely didn’t seem bothered by her blushing or the fact that she had cried on him.

“My hand,” He started. The words came out slow and gritty, “I break things.”

“Right. You told me that.” She had asked him about that a couple weeks ago. He didn’t seem happy then and he seemed more upset about it now. She just didn’t quite understand why.

“I’m worried-“ The words halted and he made a frustrated sound like he didn’t know how to keep going. Nora wanted to help him, but she didn’t know what to ask. He slid his hand across the surface of the table towards her, and it was enough of a hint.

“Are you worried you’ll hurt me?” He made an upset kind of noise, looking down at his hand still instead of at her. Nora frowned. That was definitely what he was getting at. She thought back, trying to remember an event that could have precipitated the conversation they were suddenly in the middle of. Embarrassment pooled in her stomach, “Is this because of the other day? When I was crying?” She set her cup down and shifted uncomfortably in her seat, “I really didn’t mean to unload on you like that. I appreciate the hug, but if you’re not comfortable touching-“

“No.” He said firmly, cutting off her point and leaning to look straight at her face.

“Oh, then-“ Nora tried to fish for his point, “Is it just about your hand?” He nodded. There was something about the look of him, similar as it always was, that Nora thought was different. She couldn’t quite put her finger on it, “I’m not worried about that Bucky, you’re always really gentle. But if you don’t want to touch me with this hand that’s okay.” His mouth twisted a little into maybe a frown or maybe not. Nora put her hand over the back of his, “Can I still touch your arm?”

Bucky looked at her hand over his. He took a breath and let it out slowly, “Yes.”

Bucky was worried for a minute, that he’d fucked up.

It would have been pretty fucking terrible if she thought he didn’t want to touch her at all. He’d worried about that all the way back when she’d hugged him before getting into a cab after the lab explosion. It was a good thing she understood from his ‘no’ because he didn’t think he had enough words left in him to explain the situation properly.

All-in he was pleased with how the conversation went. Nora understood his worry. She had called him gentle. He didn’t really think that was accurate, but it made him feel warm anyways. She wasn’t going to stop touching him and she seemed fine with him continuing to touch her. He’d even managed to ask her a question about the bar she’d gone to on Friday and her response hadn’t included her giving her phone number to anyone. All of that was good.

Now he had to manage the second part.

The part where he was supposed to ask her out. He tapped his fingers on the counter in front of him. He had felt confident he could do it a few days ago, but now that he was actually supposed to, he wasn’t so sure.

He’d managed to make it to a new coffee shop with Nora and sat in a booth for fifteen minutes. It was okay. He’d also managed to sit on the patio at the Spruce with her, for half an hour. That was not as okay, but she’d been willing to move chairs when he’d not-quite managed to ask, and then it was better. He felt more confident he could protect her when she was right beside him, rather than across the table.

He was just realizing how many unknowns were involved with taking her anywhere if she said yes. Distance from the tower, type of venue, seating, number of people, possibilities of crowds. It was impossible to know if he was likely to slip when he didn’t know any of the details. That wasn’t to mention the little things like the fact that if they went out to eat, he wouldn’t know what the fuck to order. Nora would probably help him with that one, but he didn’t really think she should have to.

He tapped his fingers some more.

“Problem?”

Bucky had not forgotten Natasha was there. Her presence was not like Wanda’s. It was instead, a little like sitting next to a grenade and being not quite sure if the pin was in it. She was sitting in the armchair in the corner that was, strategically, the best seating option in the lounge. Bucky had picked his seat at the counter, because it was the best vantage point against the armchair. She had been reading a book, some sort of Russian mystery, but was pointedly looking at his tapping fingers.

Bucky considered her. They were part of the same team. In theory, they should get along. Or at least try not to assess how to disable the other quite so often. Natasha had been born much closer to the current century than him. She hung out with Nora occasionally. She had a critical eye, and he was sure she took note of everyone’s behaviors. Natasha was definitely the kind of person who could be counted on to keep their mouth shut, but she might try to blackmail him with the intel at a later time.

“Wanna ask out Nora.” He said finally. He hoped Natasha might recognize it as an olive branch. He couldn’t keep looking over his shoulder every time she was in the room.

Slowly, Natasha unfolded from the chair and approached him. She put herself directly across the counter and leaned on the marble. “Out?” he nodded, “That’s a terrible idea.” Bucky frowned. What had Nora said that Natasha thought his asking her out was a bad idea?

“You can’t go out.” Natasha said, “Unfamiliar spaces, crowds, unpredictability. You’ll slip.”

Bucky wanted to argue but he had just been thinking the same thing. At least she thought it was a bad idea because he was broken and not because Nora didn’t like him. Bucky made a frustrated noise.

“Luckily for you,” She continued, “Out is not required.” Bucky eyed her and she waved a hand, “She has tower clearance.”

Bucky considered Natasha through narrowed eyes. She thought he should ask Nora to do something in the tower? That was dumb. People went out on dates, they didn’t stick around the building they worked in.

“Women in this century don’t need to go dancing, Barnes.” She said like he was stupid, “Nora knows you don’t like to leave. She’ll be willing to spend time with you here.” She picked up her book and started for the elevator, shooting over her shoulder, “Or she’ll tell you no.”

Bucky scowled at her back. She had been almost helpful and then tossed a live wire into the tangle of his anxiety. He’d have been better off asking fucking Sam.