“I didn’t expect you up so late.” Scott Summers had been caught unaware by your voice, emphasized in how he jumped behind his desk and nearly knocked over the almost empty mug of coffee by his hand. Abandoning the pen to save the cup, he jerked his head up to stare through the ruby lenses of his glasses as you braced against the doorway, arms crossed over your chest. It looked strangely domestic despite the knowledge that this very much wasn’t domestic; you were both in Xavier’s mansion on call at all time for any emergency that could take you both very far away. This wasn’t normal in the long run, but seeing you in the button up pajamas he rarely got to see you in momentarily took his breath from him.
Scott had been fascinated by you since you first arrived. He blamed his interest on the recent breakup with Jean at the time. Having only been with one woman his entire life, as of this moment, he wasn’t sure what to do once that door had closed. Of course the saying went another door should open, but he had never been looking at other doors before. He didn’t even know what door to look for. Then, like some kind of sign, you had arrived a few days later under Xavier’s hand and explanation that you were just another mutant forgotten by society. You weren’t like the children they were used to coming through, some only staying long enough to get enough life experience to go right back out into the world. You were a young adult at the time. You had the experience of living outside the mansion, yet you remained long after the surprisingly short time it took for you to learn some temperance for your mutation. It was an animalistic one according to Xavier, something he could only compare to having the genetics of a Sugar Glider slapped into your DNA.
“I’m sorry, what?” He blinked as he spoke, suddenly realizing you had been speaking and that he had, in fact, been ignoring it in favor of staring right at you. Your smile returned and he wasn’t sorry for missing what you said since he got to see that smile for it.
“I was just saying you should probably get some rest, don’t we have a busy day tomorrow?” You were right. Of course you were right. The next day did involve leaving out for another country for hopeful peace meetings with a possible mutant sanctuary in Europe. If it turned out to be true then there was a chance of working together for the care and protection of mutants. Yet he couldn’t sleep. He had tried and had managed to at least get in a couple hours, but he couldn’t keep it going before he just woke up. It was as if his body was constantly on alert, humming with an energy he couldn’t just work out in the Danger Room or through a late night jog. He had tried. That’s how he had ended up in his office simply reviewing papers and shuffling them around without an actual end in mind.
“We do.” He agreed, head tilting down so he could at least pretend to be distracted by his paperwork now. But behind those glasses, with you unable to see his gaze, he could take advantage of just staring openly at you while he thumbed the corner of a page. It was a paper of a possible teaching schedule to be implemented. One he had read at least six times before you arrived. Your steps weren’t quiet due to the house shoes you were wearing, signaling very easily as you approached his desk. He didn’t look up, found it easier to pretend his heart wasn’t picking up as you drew closer and closer.
‘Focus.’ He told himself. He felt like a kid again. It was a feeling similar to the day Jean had first showed up and the realization that there could be someone out there he could date, a thought previously ignored in favor of controlling the danger of his eyes. Then reality reminded him a relationship wasn’t easy at the same time that there were options in this world and he wasn’t sure if he could handle that many revelations in just a few years. He could barely handle when you finally circled his desk to stand at his side, just a step away from bumping into the arm of the chair he was reclined in. Realizing he couldn’t pretend you weren’t there even for his own sanity he sat up straight and turned to regard you.
You smelled like you had just showered.
“Scott, you of all people needs the rest.” You started and he found it hard to focus past noting that there were soft clouds decorating your pajamas. It was cute, he realized, once he noted the faces in each one and how they shifted from smiling to pouting to-
“Scott.” When you said his name again he jumped and you were frowning now. No, he didn’t want you to frown, he wanted that smile back. Why weren’t you smiling? “Are you even listening to me?”
“Yes.” He was quick to answer, but your cocked brow revealed that wasn’t the right answer. Not entirely. “I’m sorry, I am tired, I just can’t sleep. Mind is…won’t stop, I believe.” He turned to face his desk and the paperwork once more and motioned towards it with the pen in his hand. “I was hoping I could tire myself out through reading the same paper over and over again, but it hasn’t worked yet.”
“I highly doubt that working on paperwork is going to make it any easier to sleep, Scott.” He liked how you said his name. He really did.
“I’m not sure what else to do.” Admitting it felt like a weakness. He was the leader, after all, he should be able to just shut his mind off and sleep, right? But he just couldn’t that night. He couldn’t do a damn thing to tire himself out as if everything else he did just continued to spur him on and on. A path he was surely going to crash at the end of.
“Warm milk?” Your voice pulled him back and he stared at you. “Or, well, I sometimes listen to music to sleep. There’s also medicine Hank has, but I’m not sure if he’s even awake at this hour….you could also just try meditation. Ororo recommended me that one, but I’m not sure about it…” You were trailing off and you once more crossed your arms, losing yourself to your own thoughts as you chewed on your lip. That single action had Scott staring now at your mouth to take note of the small sore you had previously chewed onto your bottom lip. Right next to where you were currently chewing. You made a small ‘aha’ noise and he only had a moment to realize you were circling him again, suddenly behind him and out of his sight. It took a fight to not follow you with his gaze, to not turn and watch as you disappeared behind him. Instead, he kept himself facing forward with his head slightly turned.
“What are you doing?” He asked. Without being able to see you and only hearing that your steps took you right up behind him, be couldn’t even begin to guess what you were doing. At the angle you had walked he knew just where you were, could tell by the amount of steps and the way you had walked off. It wasn’t hard for him to know, but he couldn’t predict your actions. He definitely didn’t predict when hands suddenly touched his shoulders and he jumped, eyes widening behind his glasses as his pen fell from his grasp to bounce off his chair and to the floor.
“A massage. You said your mind wouldn’t turn off, but I doubt focusing it on something like paperwork would help at all, so…maybe a massage might help. You look kind of tense anyways.” You reasoned and he couldn’t argue with it. Your points made sense, after all, but it wasn’t like he suddenly had the mental capacity to actually speak once your hands touched his shoulders. He wasn’t wearing his pajamas, just a shirt and pants he had found when he couldn’t sleep, but that meant when you rolled your thumbs on the first motion of the massage you rubbed at the exposed skin of his neck and it set shivers down his spine. Scott wasn’t ashamed to say it had been a while since he had found himself at the receiving end of affection, especially anything as intimate like such. The occasional hug from another member or the hold of someone’s hand came with the job sometimes. Comfort was necessary and as their leader he was expected to help guide some through it. But intimacy like this?
He hadn’t faced a touch like this since the last time him and Jean had been together, and that had even been long before him and her had separated. It had built, after all, and with their responsibilities growing he couldn’t find time and neither could she, leaving them only in passing touches or to hold each other at night if they both happened to bed at the same time. Your hands were soft. Surprisingly soft considering how much work you’ve put in with them since your arrival. Those first few rolls of your thumbs and fingers dug in deep and he fought the initial reaction of a groan when you discovered knots in his neck. He couldn’t stop the brief grunt when you dipped a little further back as he bent forward to give you more access and found a decently sized knot between his shoulder blades.
“Jesus, Scott, you’re more than just tense.” You voice wavered between amused and concerned. He just grunted in response, bringing up an arm to brace it against the edge of his desk for him to rest his forehead against it, finding that as your fingers worked he just couldn’t keep himself upright much longer. Every swipe and dig pulled some kind of grunt or hiss from him, though he never once told you to stop. How could he when you were unraveling knots probably old enough to have graduated from the school itself. Some of the motions did hurt and ache and build up to a point he thought about stopping you, only for that pressure to suddenly break and he was able to breath again. You worked in silence after your comment, utilizing your palms and knuckles in intervals to draw more breathy sounds from him. He was barely aware of when he actually closed his eyes or how his body felt like it was floating until your motions suddenly stopped and resorted to just rubbing at his shoulders instead in a soothing, circular motion. One that eased him back to sitting up until he tilted his head up and reclined further back to acknowledge you with a glance. You were smiling above him and he swallowed thickly.
“Feeling sleepy?”
‘No.’ If he denied it would you keep going or would you be annoyed your method didn’t work? Would you pout in that way you did sometimes when something didn’t work out or when someone else teased you with words? Or would you redouble your efforts due to that stubborn streak he’s found in you? But he couldn’t lie to you like that, not when he did feel how his eyelids drooped just a little. Even if his body felt like it was ignited with nerves awaiting the next soothing touch of your hands, he was definitely floating towards a sleep that had been avoiding him.
“A nifty talent you have there.” He resorted to instead, voice drawn out in a way that emphasized how tired he had become. You looked victorious in that moment and your hands stilled on his shoulders now, but your thumbs kept moving like you couldn’t physically hold yourself still.
“Anytime you need it, Scott, you can just ask.” You patted his shoulder once before you disengaged from him, circling to stand aside his desk now. Further out of reach. He sat upright in his chair properly and spared a glance to the papers spread out across his desk before he finally rose from the chair, feeling how stiff he had gotten in the lengthy amount of time he’s spent in it. How long has he been there? The attempts at tiring himself out came much earlier shortly after he had attempted to go to bed much earlier than normal in preparation for the next day. You didn’t move until he stepped out from between his chair and desk with the intentions of leaving, your smile growing at the realization that he actually was retiring to his room. He couldn’t stop his own growing grin, even as he tried to fight it down.
“I’ll take you up on that offer.” He said. There was the sudden urge to say more, to possibly speak his mind on the subject entirely, yet he didn’t know what he could possibly say. Which is why he hesitated a step further before he cleared his throat and regarded you with a leveled stare behind those glasses. “And if…you ever need anything, I want you to come to me, okay?” It wasn’t the exact thing he wanted to say. He wanted to reassure you he would be there for you. He wanted to offer to be your own pillar of strength at times. Hell, he even wanted to try and copy one of those lines Remy would have used on Rogue possibly, adding that flair of flirting to it that he had never managed to capture just right. But he hadn’t felt the need to flirt before. Even with Jean it just happened seemingly over night, no real need to throw flashy, teasing lines at one another.
This was an entirely new battle for him.
“I’ll keep that in mind.” You said and he felt when his heart beat stuttered into a near stop at the smile you gave him. It wasn’t the bright one from moments ago, nor the victorious one when you realized your plan had worked. It was a soft, shy smile that barely had your lips curling as you held up a hand almost like a handshake, only to quickly pull it back like you were suddenly aware of whatever your plan had been. He just stared harder and noted the pink on your cheeks as you finally stepped back and towards the door. “Goodnight, Scott. See you bright and early, right?”
“Bright and early.” He confirmed and watched as you left the office.
He wasn’t getting sleep for certain.