Lupa

The next morning you wake up to warm sunlight hitting your face. Your eyes flutter open, and you sit up slowly, rubbing your eyes. You spring up straight and feel a brief moment of panic when you hear a knock at the door. You slowly creep out of bed, claws at the ready, and crack the door open. You’re greeted by Jean and Storm’s smiling faces, and you feel your shoulders lower a bit, claws retracting. “Did you sleep well?” Jean asks. You begin to nod and smile at them both. “Good. We didn’t want to wake you but almost noon, so we thought you’d be hungry.” Storm adds.

You begin to nod when all three of you hear a loud growl rumble from your stomach. You look down and dart your eyes around nervously, a pink blush spreading across your face. They both let out a tiny giggle. Jean puts a hand on your shoulder reassuringly. “C’mon, let’s get you something to eat.”

Charles, Scott, and Logan are waiting for you when you arrive at the dining area. You pass by a few other students sitting at nearby tables. You’re met with a few smiles, but mostly whispers and confused looks. You haven’t had a chance to bathe yet so the cleanest thing on you are your pajamas, which have already begun to get a little dirty just by being on you. Your hair is tangled and unruly, flowing past your hips.

You finally reach the table with familiar faces and remember what the others did the other day. You pull open a chair and sit down, scooching in. You reach for a fork and grasp it, so the fork head is facing down. It was a good start. Your eyes search over the food in front of you. You stab a piece of toast and bring it to your mouth, taking a big bite. The others look at each other and smile, glad to see you finally getting comfortable in front of them. Logan gives you a quick glance up and down and passed some bacon, nodding at you to take some. You look at him and smile, giving a little nod. He cracks the smallest bit of a smile, glad to see how far you’ve already come in your short time here.

You quietly listen as the others have a lighthearted conversation, teasing each other (mostly Scott teasing Logan), rolling their eyes (mostly Logan rolling his eyes at Scott). Your eyes dart to each of them as they talk. You chew silently and mimic a smile when they smile. You finish eating and begin to feel at ease until you see three women in light blue scrubs approach the table. You were finally starting to trust the X-Men. You weren’t open to the idea of letting anyone else in quite yet.

“Lupa, these three are here to get you cleaned up. We didn’t want to overwhelm you last night, but perhaps it’s time to freshen up a bit.” Charles says and smiles at you. You stare at him and tilt your head slightly. Logan leans over to you. “You stink.” He whispers. You lean back a little and let out a tiny, offended growl. “We’re here to give you the full spa experience, Miss Lupa.” One of the women says sweetly. You give her a growl too for good measure. She steps back a little and blinks at your unexpected reaction.

“Hah! Good luck with that.” Logan says as he swigs a strong-smelling liquid. Storm and Jean stand from their chairs and kneel next to you. “Hey, it’s going to be okay, it’s just a little bath.” Jean says. You push back from your chair and look at everyone. You feel one of the women in blue grab your hand. Instinctively, you turn your body and scratch her. She lets out a small cry and steps back, a few beads of blood trickling from her hand. You look at the horrified faces surrounding you and then down at the red covering your fingertips. You look back up at the girl, your eyes wide with worry. “B…Bad…” You stutter out, clearly upset at yourself. Jean puts a hand on your shoulder and looks at you, a little disappointment behind her eyes. You turn around to the table and grab a piece of bread. You slowly walk toward the woman you scratched and hand her your peace offering, your eyes pinned to the floor. You look up when you feel her taking the bread. She nods at you and smiles. “We won’t hurt you. I promise.”

As you follow the three women, along with Jean and Storm (for emotional support) you hear Logan shout from the table “Don’t forget the muzzle!” Then a second later he yelps, “Ow! I was kidding!”
-----

Logan, Scott, and Charles approach the room where you’re being cleaned up. As they get closer, they hear loud shrieks, crashing metal, and the occasional voice yell “It’s okay, Lupa”, “Calm down!”, “Hey, no biting!”

Logan stifles his laughter when Charles and Scott look at him, disappointed. He puts his hands up in surrender. “Hey, I told them to bring the muzzle.”
-----

After a few painstaking hours and lots of blood, sweat and tears, you are finally finished. The three women, along with Jean and Storm are panting, trying to catch their breath. You sniff yourself and recoil at the strong perfume. Still, the transformation was impressive, shocking really. Your ratty, tangled hair was now in a clean, shiny chop just below your shoulders, tucked behind your ears with a headband. The dirt washed off to reveal your rather soft, pale skin. They dressed you in a neat, almost preppy outfit consisting of a dark grey sweater vest, a cute white collared shirt underneath with the sleeves resting just above your wrists, a black pleated skirt just above the knee, and shiny black shoes with bunched up white socks. You study yourself in the mirror, looking yourself up and down, not sure how to feel about the complete stranger looking back at you. Jean and Storm approach you. Jean wipes some sweat from her forehead and folds her arms, a satisfied smile creeping across her lips. “Let’s show the boys.”

The three men don’t even recognize you as you step out. Charles and Scott blink at you, completely amazed. Logan was staring at the floor, resting his face on his hand half asleep when you walked out. As he heard the others gasp he looks up and does a double take. His eyes slowly trace over your body then land on your face. They stay there for a while. With how much hair had been covering your dirt covered face before, he never really got a good look at it. But now with your clean shiny hair pulled away from your face, he can’t help but take a moment to admire it. You were cute. Beautiful, actually. Your eyes meet his and you let the cutest, faintest smile form on your face. It sends a bolt through his heart. He blinks once or twice and subtly shakes his head.

“Sooooo? What do you think? She’s like a whole new girl, huh?” Jean says, impressed with their hard work. She elbows you playfully. Storm faces you. “How do you like it? Do you feel better now that you’re all clean?” You grab the corner of your sweater vest and rub it between your fingers, feeling how soft the fabric is. You look at Storm and begin to nod. “It’s… nice. Thank… you.” You say timidly. Storm places a hand on your shoulder and squeezes lightly.

“Marvelous!” Charles exclaims.

“Wow, I mean wow! Great job, all of you.” Scott says.

Logan snaps out of it when he realizes it’s his turn to talk. He looks at the others then quickly to you then even quicker to the floor. He clears his throat. “Yeah, not bad.” He shrugs. His eyes slowly raise to meet yours and the corner of his mouth forms a smile. “You look good, kid.”

Something in you begins to stir as well. You’re not certain Logan isn’t the enemy based on how he dragged you out of your home while you were kicking and screaming. But since then, he’s been… kind. And you won’t try to deny it, he was handsome. You didn’t know entirely what that meant or what it was specifically about him that drew you in, but as the days went on you would replay the image of him smiling at you and saying those words. “You look good, kid.”
-----

A few weeks pass. Jean and Storm take turns helping you work through the collection of books in your room, helping you sound out the words and gain a bit more confidence speaking and expressing yourself. It’s refreshing to everyone that you’re able to communicate with more than angry growls and bared fangs.

After a particularly challenging study session with Jean, you decide to go for a walk and get some fresh air. You pass by a clearing towards the back of the school and spot Logan. He’s taking out some pent-up aggression on a harmless tree, stripping it of all its bark. You step aside, hiding behind a tree. Your eyes glide over his strong form. You feel your chest flutter a bit as you focus on his accentuated back muscles as he rotates his body. You chew on your bottom lip a little and put a hand to your chest. Why is your heart racing? You swallow and turn away from him, leaning your back up against the tree and looking up at the sun shining through the leaves. You catch a slight movement in one of the back windows of the school.
-----

Logan wraps up his training session and heads inside. As he walks in, he’s greeted by Charles. “Logan. Come with me a moment.” Logan follows Charles to his office.

“Listen, before you say anything, Scott started it okay? He was just being such a little-” Logan starts.

“This isn’t about your petty squabbles, Logan.” Charles says as he raises a hand, cutting Logan off from whatever profanity he was about to spew. Logan shifts a little, relieved he isn’t here to be chewed out. “It’s about the girl. Lupa. She seems to have grown fond of you. I caught her watching you train earlier. She must see the similarities in your abilities. I think this could work in both of your favors.”

Logan raises an eyebrow. “What are you getting at?”

“I want you to train her. It’s time. The others have been quite helpful in getting her out of her shell. It’s time she works with someone to control her abilities.” Charles says.

Several things go through Logan’s mind as he hears Charles’ words. He thinks about you. Your anger, nasty personality, cute face, timid voice, soft body. He adjusts his stance and shakes his head, trying to get his thoughts straight. Wherever these thoughts were coming from, he needed them to go back there. He knew he was the last guy who could be there for you. He couldn’t even be there to support his team. He needed to create more distance, not close that gap. For both your sakes. He runs a hand along his clenched jaw and shakes his head again. “I’m not a babysitter. You wanted me to bring her here? I did. That’s where my job ends. Not my responsibility.”

“You’re an X-Man. Helping others is your sole responsibility.” Charles says bluntly. Logan lets out a long sigh. “I won’t be any good at it. I’ve never been the teaching type.”

“Maybe this is an opportunity for both of you to grow. You need this Logan, as much as she does.” Charles says in a more serious tone. Logan concedes. Maybe Charles was right. He usually was. He decides to give in to Charles’ wish. “Yeah… Yeah alright Charles. I’ll do it.”

-----

After a solo reading session, you start to lose focus when your stomach growls loudly. You sigh and put the book down. Usually, you eat with Jean and Storm but they were out on a mission. You didn’t want to bother Scott or Logan… It was time to try this alone. As you enter the dining hall your stomach sinks when you see how packed it is. As you make your way to the trays you glance around to see several students eyeing you down, leaning over to whisper things to the students next to them.

You quickly grab some food and find a spot a few seats away from anyone. “Where are your bodyguards? Finally got tired of babysitting you, huh?” A guy says. You flinch a little at his words and stare at your lap. “I saw her spying on Logan earlier. I think Wolverine has a stalker…” You hear a girl say. You feel your face getting hot and suddenly lose your appetite. Without looking at them you shoot up and dash out of the dining hall. Tears start to well in your eyes and you hear a few giggles in passing.

You crash into someone as you leave. You take a step back and see Logan. You quickly wipe the tears on your cheek. You hear a few girls burst out in laughter as they see you crash into Logan. You feel the embarrassment in your chest like a knife. You quickly walk away.

“Lupa, hey! Where are you going?” You hear Logan say, followed by footsteps. Rather quickly he catches up to you, and you feel him grab your wrist. It stops you in your tracks. “Hey, what’s going on? Are you okay?” He looks at you then back at the cafeteria doors. You quickly wipe your eyes and turn to face him. “Nothing. I’m fine.” You say in a quiet voice. Logan swallows when he sees your face. It’s obvious you were crying. He feels a tightness in his chest at the sight of it. But Logan wasn’t exactly skilled at talking about sensitive topics, especially when it came to women. He wasn’t sure if this was the time to leave it, or ask further which might result in a big blow up. He decided to play it safe.

“Right… Walk with me. C’mon.” He pats your back awkwardly. You follow him. “So, I was talking to Charles. He… thinks it would be a good idea if I help you with your training.” He glances down at you, trying to gage your reaction. You stop walking, blinking at him. A couple butterflies start to flutter in your chest. Your lips part, but you’re not sure what to say.

“You know, sparring, agility. Nothing crazy. You got some pretty impressive claws there. Might be good to know how to use ‘em.” Logan says, shrugging a little, trying not to sound overly enthusiastic. “I mean, if you want to. Not exactly sure I’ll be much help.” He rubs the back of his neck and looks away.

“Y-yes!” You blurt out before recoiling back slightly, biting your lip. Also trying to hide your excitement. He smiles. “You free right now?” He asks. You suppress a smile and nod happily. He gestures for you to follow him. As you walk, your brain floods with the words those nasty girls said about you and Logan… And about the kind words Logan said to you. You can’t hide the redness on your cheeks. You look down the rest of the walk.
-----

You’re still in a strange mood by the time you arrive at the training area. It was a huge, dark, dimly lit room covered in some type of protective padding.

Logan begins to explain the training process, talking through the basics of how to stand, holding your core, etc. While you listed it suddenly hits you that you’re all alone with Logan. You think back to his strong, sweaty body earlier that day.

“Looks like Wolverine’s got a stalker.” Hits you once again. You feel your stomach churn. Logan turns to look at you. Clearly something was wrong.

“Hey, c’mon now, what’s wrong? Tell me. What really happened back there?” He asks. You shake your head. “Come on. We can’t train when you’re all gloomy… I knew this was a bad idea.” He sighs. You bite your lip a little as you feel hot tears form in your eyes. You can feel your mood shifting. Your anger is overriding your system.

“Talk to me, Lupa. You can’t keep being afraid of people. You have to open up. Come on...” He steps forward and places a hand lightly on your shoulder. You feel the warmth from his hand spread through your body. Logan feels you tense up and slowly lifts his hand, clearing his throat.

All you want to do is stand there and feel his comforting hands on your body. But you can’t control yourself right now. The confusion and sadness and anger has bubbled up too much inside you.

You take his advice and don’t hold your tongue. Slowly, as if you’re subconsciously trying to hold the word in you whisper out, “Hypocrite.” Logan does a double take and blinks at you, furrowing his brow. “What? What did you just say?”

Your lip curls into a sneer, revealing a fang. He scoffs. “Hypocrite, huh? That your new ‘word of the day’ sweetheart?” He says coldly. He turns his back and throws his hands up, then turns back around to face you. “What do you know? Nothing.”

Something in you snaps. You lunge forward and aim for his neck. He grabs your wrist and holds it firmly while you squirm around. “You don’t wanna go there, princess.” He whispers.

Your eyes go wide and a tear falls down your cheek. You attempt to slash him with your other hand. He grabs that wrist too, now holding you tightly with both hands, eyes locked on your face. After failing to leave his grasp you feel your body loosen. You allow your eyes to meet his. They nearly melt you. His big warm eyes, strong hands on your wrists, nobody else around in the dark room. You feel a shudder spread through your body.

You bite your lip and look away, mortified. “Let… go.” Your voice cracks. He doesn’t move. You hear him let out a little sigh and quietly whisper, “You just… Damnit.” As you go to look back up at him you notice a strange shape forming in his jeans. His grip tightens. You look back up at him, eyes wide. Logan’s face is completely red. After a minute he meets your gaze. He was letting his own feelings get the better of him as well. When he sees the confusion on your face his stomach drops. What the hell was he doing?

He quickly releases you from his grip. You stumble a little and nearly fall backwards. He takes a few steps away from you and rubs a hand down his neck. “I… I don’t have time for this shit.” He says and quickly leaves the room. He stops for a moment at the door when you call out his name. As you take a step towards him, he quickly leaves and lets the door close behind him.

You slowly slink to the floor. Your heart was beating fast. You grip your thighs with shaky hands. What was that? What was going on? You were even more confused than before. “Logan…” You let out in a whimper.