Logan felt cold and alone. Arms restrained behind his back, mouth muzzled and gagged- he couldn't move.
He felt dirty. Violated.
Left there just to weep.
He thrashed around, growing angrier and more unhappy by the second.
Footsteps made their way closer. Logan tried to scream. He felt calloused hands on his shoulders. The screaming intensified.
"Logan."
Please god no.
"Logan..."
Not again please, God, please.
"Logan."
Logan shot up screaming, the claws of his right fist buried deep into Wade's torso.
Wade winced. "Ouch, peanut, angry kitty today huh?"
"Get the fuck away from me! Fuck." Logan retracted his arm and put his head in his hands.
"Woah, hey, it was just another nightmare, baby boy." Wade said as he placed a hand on the small of Logan's back only for it to be immediately shaken off.
"Don't fucking touch me."
"Hey, hey, Logan what's wrong? What happened big guy you're never this upset. You know it's just a dream."
Logan closed his eyes tighter and sighed. He has been in Wades universe for a couple of weeks now. In that time Wade's gotten used to his constant night terrors and the unavoidable 6 blades stabbing into his chest every morning (a small price to pay for sharing a bed with the wolverine Wade believes). The past few nights his nightmares have been a lot worse. They haven't been his usual pictures of the blood, death, and horror he caused. Instead it was happening to him. This isn't the first time he's had nightmares like this. Fuck he'd had them as long ago as when Stryker fused that poison to his skeleton, but it had been a while.
Wade started speaking again using a much softer tone, "Logan? What's wrong buddy, you know you can tell me."
Logan didn't reply, just brought his knees up high enough to tighten his arms around them and force his eyes into his forearms. For a split second Wade could see the tears in his eyes.
"Logan." Wade said a little sterner, worry still pouring from the word.
He watched hesitantly as the mass of a man in front of him peaked the top of his head out from where he cowered, revealing two bloodshot eyes with soft trails of tears trailing down his cheeks. Wade felt his heart drop. He'd never seen Logan so upset before. He couldn't lie, part of him was so giddy at the thought that Logan trusted him enough to let him see him in such a state but he quickly buried the thought and focused on the broken man before him again.
"Hey, Logan, come on it's alright, you know you can trust me. Can you tell me what happened, pup?" Wade had returned his hand to the small of Logan's back very slowly, making Logan tense up abruptly but then soften into his touch, finally giving in.
"It's just another nightmare, bub, you don't wanna know." Logan's voice broke halfway through his sentence while the rest was broken up with a hiccup or two
"I think I do Log', nothing I can't handle, no dick too big or sex too rough, but seriously this seems to be really upsetting you, big guy."
Logan didn't speak for a while. Wade went to break the silence with a question to get anything from him.
"Was it about the experiments?"
Logan anxiously shook his head, biting down on his cheek hard.
"You have no idea the shit they did, Wade."
"You can tell me, pup, it'll be okay." Wade lightly traced his hand up Logan's spine to his head where he gently ruffled his hair then started running his fingers through it.
"A little after the Weapon X shit, Stryker sent these guys to a bar I was at to drug me and take me back," Logan started. Wade leaned in placing his free hand on Logan's, keeping his other petting his hair.
"I didn't know this yet but apparently they'd been planning on getting me back for a sperm sample for some fucked up breeding plan they had going on." Wade felt his heart sink again.
"Now uh- you and I both know why that didn't work out but I guess these guys missed the memo."
Just over a week ago now Logan had opened up to Wade about how he was transgender. Apparently he'd been on testosterone for almost 20 years now. The only person who knew was Professor X from the one time he read his mind- well- Wade also knew now but that was just during a moment of vulnerability with a drunk Logan in his kitchen. He felt bad about the needle dick comment he made the day they met but Logan didn't seem to care much.
"They caught on eventually and had to improvise I guess. I was- I was still blacked out when it started," Logan tensed once more, arms shaking now, the trembling in his voice returning, catching some of his words to hold at the back of his throat.
"I uh- when I woke up- can you not look at me for a second? I'm sorry I- I j- I just can't with you staring like that."
"Sure." Wade smiled, turning his head to the side and angling his body slightly so he was still facing Logan but his neck wasn't strained.
Logan cleared his throat and took a shaky breath in. "Wh- when I woke up I was-," a few tears trickled their way down Logan's face and into his beard.
"I was clamped down onto uh- onto this bed and uh- there was..." Logan said the last few words so quietly that Wade couldn't make out a single thing.
"Peanut, I'm so sorry but you're gonna have to speak up, I didn't catch that last part. What happened, honey badger?" Logan sighed deeply, eyes still stinging.
"I uh- I was fully clamped down onto this bed or bench or something and- Wade- just every night that week they were- fuck." With a face full of tears, Logan took both his hands up, freeing one from Wade's grip, and covered his eyes and mouth as he finished what he was saying.
"They raped me every night." Logan choked out a huge sob, shoulders jerking with every little breath in. He wasn't trying to stop anymore he just kept crying and crying. Wade could swear his heart stopped. He already knew how much Logan had been through but it just seemed to keep getting worse. Over 200 years of pain this poor many is carrying on his shoulders- no wonder he's so angry. He moved his hand from Logan's head and pulled him into a hug. Logan basically threw himself into Wade, face buried in his chest immediately. He cried harder and harder, fists fully clenched on Wade's shirt.
"Logan, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry you're still reliving that- that's horrible. Thank you for telling me, pup. I'm so sorry."
Logan cried harder, tightening his grip on Wade's shirt, making his three claws burst out, just nicking the side of Wade's face. Logan started apologizing profusely, putting his claws away and holding Wade's face. Wade just hushed him and held him close again. He held him until he stopped crying. Surprisingly enough, Logan was the one to break the silence.
"This is nice." He said, muffled into Wade's body.
"You think so, peanut?" Wade ruffled his hair.
"I'm- I'm just not used to physical touch that isn't violent is all."
"Well I can offer plenty of that, baby boy." Logan felt his cheeks flush.
"Quit calling me that."
"Is someone embarrassed?" Logan pulled his red face from against Wade, frowning and furrowing his eyebrows.
"Shut up, bub." Logan pulled Wade into another hug. Maybe he could get used to this whole being-close-to-another-person thing.