It was so cold. Even after they’d snuck into the first train car and got out of the wind, there was no reprieve.
“’m freezin’, Buck. ’s so cold...” Steve shivered as he huddled under the heap of blankets.
“I know, Stevie. I know.” Bucky got up from the recliner he’d dragged into the room to sit at Steve’s bedside and started peeling back the layers that Steve had begged so desperately for throughout the evening. “Your fever’s up, though, and we gotta do something before...” Bucky tried not to panic as he looked around the damned apartment, trying to figure out what the next step should be, though Bucky wished giving Steve a smack to the head for insisting on coming back to their place after that damned fight with the poison-tipped, spiky porcupine asshole guy was a viable option.
“Oh, don’t worry about me,” Steve had said after they’d all reconvened at the tower to debrief. “The serum makes me immune to most toxins,” Steve had said. “... and if I’m not immune, then it’s still not really a big deal. My body’ll fight if off lickety-split. Easy as pie,” Steve had said. He’d even shrugged!
Fuck!
For his current baking fixation, Bucky knew damned well that making a pie wasn’t easy, and seven hours into Steve’s attempt at fighting this shit off, he knew that this wasn’t easy either.
“Buck!” Steve yelled out as he jackknifed up and stared wild-eyed at his best friend. “The robot soldiers are coming! We gotta’ go!” He twisted and tried to stand.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa! Get yer’ ass back in bed, Punk.” Bucky grabbed him by the shoulders and gently guided him back into the bed. “There ain’t no soldiers here, robot or otherwise.”
Steve fought against Bucky’s grip, though only a little, “But—I...” Steve scanned the room, sure he’d seen... “Wha-?”
Buck realized immediately, then pressed a hand to Steve’s forehead to confirm. “Aw, Stevie, you’re burnin’ up, buddy, and we gotta do somethin’ about it.” He was really wished they’d stayed back at the tower. While the company made for some awkward moments, at least they’d have had IVs and cooling blankets for this exact situation ‘cuz the washcloths they sure as hell weren’t doing enough. “Damn it.” Bucky realized what he had to do. “Looks like we’re goin’ old school.”
Bucky brushed his fingers against Steve’s cheek. “I’m gonna be right back, ‘kay?” he explained softly as he sat him down in the chair he’d just vacated. “I’m gonna go run a tub for ya’... cool ya’ down before this gets any worse.”
Please, Bucky prayed, don’t let this get worse.
Steve barely nodded in acknowledgement, watching him through half-lidded eyes. Bucky took that as his cue to go ahead—
—Until Steve registered Bucky approaching the bedroom door. “Bucky!” Steve screamed in rasped horror, begged, “Don’t go!” as Steve braced himself to watch Bucky fall-fall—fall out of the train car and down into that icy ravine behind enemy lines once more. “Please! Not again. You can’t die again!”
Bucky stopped in his tracks. How had he not clued in to where his best friend was lost? “Stevie,” Bucky couldn’t just stand there like a dumbass so he called out for him as he rushed back.
Steve was already damn near hyperventilating.
“Stevie!” Bucky called out, trying to grab his focus before he went too far into his flashback. “We’re not there. We’re here—we’re right here—in our apartment in Brooklyn, New York in the good ol’ U.S. of A. You’re safe. I’m safe and I’m here... I’m here.” Bucky couldn’t figure out what to say so he squeezed into the bed beside him and wrapped his own arms tight around him. “Come on, you’re okay. Just breathe.” Bucky kept up his litany of useless reassurances and rocked them until Steve finally started to calm.
“Buck?” Steve whispered as he came back to himself, confused. “Wha’s goin’ on?”
“I’m takin’ care of you, idiot.” Bucky tightened his grip briefly before leaning back to get a better look at his best friend, “And tryin’ to figure out how to get you into a bath.” Bucky figured there was no harm in communicating his intentions again. “Would you be alright if we tried this again?”
Steve glanced around the room, obliviously confused. “But...”
Bucky couldn’t let him fall into another spiral. “You’re all good, Stevie. It’s just us here. You and me...”
Steve didn’t seem to believe him, eyes glued to one especially dark corner of the room.
“Hey!” Buck brought his attention back to him, “How’s about we get you out of the stuffy room for a bit, huh? Keep me company while the tub is runnin’ then we’ll get you all fresh and cleaned up, sound good?”
Steve gave a hesitant nod.
“Great!” Bucky exclaimed, then squeezed Steve into another hug before he stood up. “Are you feelin’ steady?”
Steve nodded again.
Bucky showed no mercy in flinging aside the blankets resting against Steve’s legs, and blatantly ignoring the whimper that escaped Steve’s lips. “Alright then, what do you say? Sitting first sound good?”
This time, Steve was having trouble finding his words, couldn’t answer—
—Not that Bucky was waiting for Steve’s permission. He could feel that the heat coming off of him wasn’t lessening. “Alright then, on three—one... two... and...” With no effort, Bucky had Steve up and teetering on unsteady feet. “There you go,” Bucky praised him. “When you’re ready, we’ll start walkin’ and before you know it, we’ll have the water goin’ and you’ll be on your way. Sound good?”
Steve nodded a third time, probably responding more so to Bucky’s tone than anything else, not that it mattered. The trust between the two men was unfailing. Within minutes, they were where they needed to be and Steve was planted firmly on the closed toilet seat while Bucky rushed to get things going.
“Man, Stevie, you wanna talk about flashbacks? I remember doing this for your dumb ass plenty of times while your mama was out workin.’” Bucky checked the water temperature before putting the plug in—no way would he risk it being too cold. “Only this time, we can actually fix the fact that you smell like garbage.” He grabbed the body wash from the edge of their tub and squeezed out a healthy sum.
“Shut up,” Steve mumbled as he dragged a near limp hand across his sweaty face. “Gotta be nice to me. ’m sick.”
“Nope. Sorry, man. I don’t gotta be nice to anyone.” Bucky planted a kiss on the crown of his head. “What I gotta do is get your fever down.” Bucky backed up. “Do you need a hand gettin’ undressed? Or are you feelin’ steady enough to manage on your own?”
Steve closed his eyes and breathed deep a few times, trying to steel himself for the challenge. “I think I got this...” He looked at Bucky and smiled weakly, “maybe just stay close? In case I...?”
Bucky imagined that Steve would be blushing now if his face had any colour at all. He knew exactly how much Steve had hated it when he needed help when they were younger, and present day was no different. “Of course, Stevie. You know I got your back.” Bucky simply busied himself collecting a couple of extra towels and making sure they were hanging at the ready on the towel bar, then turned the water off. “Ready?” he asked over his shoulder.
No answer.
Bucky whipped around, heart in his throat, “Stevie?!”
Steve’s eyes flew open as Bucky’s cry woke him from his involuntary nap. Steve gasped in fright, then cried out as he stood, lost his balance what with his boxers settled around his thighs, and windmilled in an effort to keep upright.
“Oh, shit!” Bucky flew forward and caught Steve under his arms before something catastrophic could happen, holding him still as they both caught their breath. “Are you okay?”
Steve rested his forehead on Bucky’s shoulder and huffed out a laugh. “... guess I did need a hand.”
Bucky pressed his cheek to Steve’s neck and chuckled back, “Ya’ think?”
“ha. ha.”
Bucky could feel himself taking on more and more of Steve’s weight as they stood there. “Alright, punk, it’s cool down time. In you go,” and shifted his support to under Steve’s arms. “Just a couple of steps... there you go.” He choreographed the perfect first step in and then—
“Shit! ’s too cold, too cold!” Steve tried to back out.
But Bucky wouldn’t—couldn’t let him. “Sorry, man, that fever’s gotta come down,” Bucky insisted, “and if you’re gonna fight me on it, I’ll wrap you up in your pile of blankets, toss you over my shoulder, and take you back to the bloody tower—where you should have fucking stayed in the first place!”
Steve must have been feeling especially miserable because he gritted his teeth and, still using Bucky for balance, he stepped fully into the tub. “’m sorry. I hate how they act when I get sick... like ’s not allowed or something... and I think—” Steve’s teeth chattered just a little, “ice baths aren’t a thing anymore, Buck. ’s really too cold.”
Bucky adjusted his hold and helped Steve to kneel. “I know, but it ain’t an ice bath. It’s lukewarm, I promise. The hot water was on and everything... you’re just feelin’ that shitty.”
“Lies.” Steve mumbled.
“Not lies,” Bucky kept a hold of Steve’s hand as he stretched out a little more. “Remember? Stark made us all take that first aid course. This was right in the manual and everything—and maybe you’ll remember this the next time you decide to be all cocky about toxins and shit, huh?”
Steve scowled as he shivered. “Shut up.”
“You shut up, in fact, I wasn’t lying about you smellin’ bad. The tub’s not filled too deep. Why don’t you lie down and soak a bit? Cool ya’ down a bit faster, too.”
Steve closed his eyes, “Lyin’ down sounds good.”
“Okay,” Bucky was feelin’ better about Steve’s compliance. “How’s about you do that then, and I’ll head into the bedroom and tidy up.”
Steve hummed in agreement and, with Bucky’s supporting hand, slid to rest along the slightly inclined tub backrest.
“Yeah, yeah, I remember how much you loved clean sheets and fresh pajamas, even back then...” Bucky smiled as he stood and recalled Steve’s appreciation for the little things. “I’ll be in the check on you every single minute, though, so don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone.”
“How can I? You take all the stupid with you.”
Bucky shook his head and his smiling growing bigger. “How did I get stuck with an idiot like you?”
“Luck.”
“I guess so.” Bucky’s gaze softened.
Steve sighed, “Love you, Buck.”
“I love you, too.”