Kintsugi

“Wheres the couple of the hour?” Miverva asked as she walked through the house doors on Christmas eve.

“Hi Auntie Minny,” Ophelia hugged the woman, “Here, let me take your bags.”

“Congratulations my dear,” Minerva took Ophelia's face into her hands and planted a kiss on her cheek, “You must be over the moon.”

Ophelia smiled and sighed, “You have no idea.”

“Where are your fathers? None of us have talked properly in ages,” Minerva commented.

Ophelia took a quick look behind her and replied, “I think they are in the basement setting things up, the Weasleys arrived this morning and Grandma and Grandad should be here in the evening.”

“What a full house!” Minerva smiled before linking arms with her wife and leaving for the basement
…
Sirius turned the corner into the living room when he found Remus standing there pacing. He immediately came to his husband's side and wrapped an arm around his waist. “They’re alright, love, they’ll be here soon.”
“It's already 6pm!” Remus exclaimed, “And Mum said that they would be here by 5.”
“So they’re running a bit late, there's no issue.” Sirius said as he pressed a kiss to his husband's cheek.
“But what if-” Remus began before getting quickly cut off.
“No what ifs. Everything is going to be okay. Now come on! I don’t think we’ve had a Christmas this big since we were 15!”
“Alright,” Remus leaned into his husbands touch, “It is quite nice.”
“Yeah see, theres your Christmas spirit!” Sirius chuckled, “Now come on! Me and Mum made a batch of gingerbread cookies.”
Remus smiled and followed his husband to the kitchen. They were enjoying being with their whole family.
After an hour or two absolutely everyone was there. Everyone but Hope and Lyall Lupin. Now Remus’ worry consumed the forefront of his mind, the worst case scenario just then as he was staring out the window a scrawny old owl tapped at the glass on the window. Remus recognized it as his mothers old pet owl, and quickly let it in. It had a small piece of parchment attached to its legs, but strangely once Remus had taken it off the bird flew away. The owl always stayed a day or two and left with a response so Remus found its current actions strange. He quickly skimmed the note, then again and again. The only thing he picked up was that Dad was sick.
His dad was sick.
Remus, who was overcome with emotion quickly got into the floo and flooed away to his parents home.
Once Remus stepped inside his childhood home it felt different, wrong. It felt old and it felt like the walls were caving in on him. His mom must have heard him because she called, “We are up here baby!”
Remus dashed up the stairs and felt the world slow down when he saw his father. His father, who was so joyful and so alive, was hovering between the line between life and death. Remus kneeled so that he was in his fathers sight.
“Remus,” Lyall breathed.
“Hi dad,” Remus was grateful when he spoke “How are you?”
“Wheres the boy?” Lyall asked, looking behind Remus.
Remus was confused. Alex hadn’t came out to his father yet, “Who? Alex?”
“Is that his name?” Lyall asked, “He’s a wonderful boy. You and Sirius are lucky.”
“How did you know?” Remus breathed.
“I always knew,” Lyall explained. He then moved on to looking at the scars on Remus’ face. He grazed them with his fingers, “And hows Ophelia. She’s got a wolf issue too, right?”
“Yes,” Remus laughed at his father's seemingly never ending sense of humor, “She’s good. She’s getting married.”
“Well that’s just splendid.” Lyall gushed, “Too bad I won’t be there.”
“Don’t say that!” Hope exclaimed from the corner where she was sitting, “You are going to be fine Lyall!”
“No I won’t. No point in getting our hopes up” Lyall shook his head before turning to Remus.
Before Lyall could start again Remus interjected, “Dad, please, don’t say that. You will be fine.”
“My boy, my time has come.” Lyall looked over Remus’ shoulder at Hope, “You must be strong when I leave.” Lyall paused for a moment, studying Remus’ face before wiping a tear from his son's face, “You are such a wonderful boy Remus. You bring the world so much joy. I am so proud of the man you’ve become. I love you so much.”
Remus looked at his father, soaking up his features, trying to burn the image of him into his mind. “Merry Christmas Dad.” Remus smiled.
Lyalls untouched expression turned into a soft smile, “It’s Christmas? How lovely. Merry Christmas my Hope. Merry Christmas my beautiful boy. You should go.”
“What?” Remus was taken aback, “I can stay here with you Dad.”
“Your fathers right.” Hope interrupted, “You should be with Sirius and the kids.”
“Listen to your mother son.” Lyall added. “I’ll be here tomorrow.”
“Are you sure Dad?” Remus asked, questioning whether he was asking his father if he were alright with him leaving or if he would be there the next day. “I can stay.”
“Yes.” Lyall nodded before planting a quick kiss on his son's head, “I am sure. And bring the kids tomorrow.”
“Okay.” Remus finally agreed. He also remembered that he left with no note or notice, “I love you Dad.”
“I love you too Remus.” Lyall said before Remus and Hope left the room. “You are the best son a man could ask for.”
Remus bid his goodbyes to his dad and walked downstairs with his mom.
“We’ll come by tomorrow.” Hope said, standing on her toes to give her son a proper hug.
“You’ll let me know if anything happens right?” Remus asked.
“Of course.” Hope affirmed, “I love you.”
“I love you too Mum.” Remus replied before apparating away.
Remus landed back in the kitchen where he found Peter, James and Sirius all standing together sipping something Remus could only assume was hot chocolate.
“Hey Moony!” Peter smiled once he saw his friend. “Hot chocolate?” Peter offered, handing a cup to Remus.
“Moony, where have you been?” James asked, “And weren’t Hope and Lyall supposed to come?”
“I was out on a walk.” Remus lied, “And Mum and Dad got caught in a snowstorm. They’ll pop by tomorrow.” Remus was actually quite impressed with himself, “Oh well. We are a pretty full house no?”
“Yeah.” Sirius didn’t seem to believe Remus but didn’t say anything, “That we are.”
Pretty soon James filled the silence with a yawn, “Well I’m off to bed. I’ll see you lot in the morning. Merry Christmas.”
“Merry Christmas.” The three of them echoed back.
“Well, I’m going to bed too.” Sirius announced, “Moons you coming?”
“Yeah.” Remus replied, “Night Pete. Merry Christmas.”
“Merry Christmas you guys.” Peter smiled, watching the pair retreat up the stairs to their room. Once they got to their room Sirius put up a silencing spell, “Where were you Moons?”
“A walk outside Siri. Why do you ask?” Remus replied, lying through his teeth.
“Ah yes, a walk out in your pyjamas.” Sirius pointed out, “Also, pretty sure the Welsh countryside isn’t a part of the Potter manor grounds.”
Remus gave up trying to defend his lies and sat down on the bed with his back against the headboard. “Did you find the-”
“Yes, I found the letter,” Sirius replied, sitting down and putting an arm over his husband, “I made sure none of the kids saw it. Why didn’t you tell me, love?”
“He’s dying Pads.” Remus said, leaning his head against the headboard of their bed as he mulled over the events of the night in his mind. “He’ll be lucky to make it to New Years.”
Sirius could basically hear his Moony’s heart shatter. “You wanna talk about it?”
“No.” Remus slid down the bed and turned to face Sirius, “I just want to sleep.”
Sirius laid down beside him and pulled Remus in close. He kissed the top of his head, “Okay, we can do that.” Sirius broke the silencing spell and turned off the lights, “He’ll be alright Moons.” Sirius’ affirmation was met with heavy breathing.
…
The next morning Remus woke up extremely early. But instead of being giddy with joy as the rest of the house he was struck with fear. He looked at the alarm clock on the desk and found that it was 5 am. He was thinking about the day and when best to bring the kids to see his parents. Remus didn’t notice that he was pacing until Sirius called, “You alright Moony?”
“I just…” Remus paused his pacing and turned to face the bed, “I just can’t shake the feeling that something awful is going to happen. I think I should go there.”
“Would it make you feel better?” Sirius asked. Remus was taken aback by his response. He didn’t expect that, especially since Sirius was always so helpful with breaking his spiraling.
“Oh,” Remus remarked softly, “Yeah, it would.”
“You should go then.” Sirius stood up and grabbed his hands, he was about to continue his thought before Remus jumped in, “No, it’s alright. I don’t wanna ruin Christmas.”
Sirius moved closer so that their foreheads were touching, “Go see him Remus. He’s your dad. We’ll be just fine.” He placed a soft kiss on his lips.
Remus smiled, “Thank you my love.”
Sirius pulled away, “Anything for my Moony.”
Remus placed a kiss of his own on Sirius, “I love you.” He then got up and moved to their suitcase. He pulled two presents and some clothes and quickly changed. “Bye love. I’ll be back before lunch.”
“Take your time.” Sirius reminded him just as Remus disappeared.
“Mum! Dad! I’m here.” Remus called out after landing in his parents living room. Hope emerged from the kitchen with a tray of breakfast in hand. “Hi darling. Merry Christmas.” Remus ran over and levitated the tray of food so that his mothers hands would be free. “Hi Mum! Merry Christmas.” He then handed her a gift bag. “This is for you.”
When Hope opened the bag to reveal a beautiful black hat with roses and other flowers on it she smiled and hugged Remus, “Oh baby! It’s wonderful. You shouldn’t have.”
“Your welcome Mum.” Remus smiled, “I got something for Dad too.”
Hope smiled, “Ah yes. Let's wake him up.” As the pair of them made it up the stairs Remus couldn’t help but feel the nostalgia. It was all eerily familiar to when Remus was a kid and he and Hope would make chocolate chip pancakes to surprise Lyall with breakfast in bed. Once they reached the outside of his room the nostalgia in the room was replaced with fear and tension. Remus made the executive decision to open the door. Remus didn’t know why he was expecting something bad to happen but as he was bracing for the worst of it he opened the bedroom door to find his Dad awake and out of bed.

“Merry Christmas Hope!” Lyall beamed before he noticed his son standing in the doorway, “Remus!? You’re here!”

“Merry Christmas Dad.” Remus smiled, relieved that the worst was yet to come. He handed him the present that he got for him which was a beep blue tie with golden embroidery on it. Lyall held the tie in his hand before making his way to his son and giving him a hug, “Thank you, I love it.

“You’re welcome, Dad.”

“So are we going to effies home or not?” Lyall asked, already pulling out clothing to wear.

“Woah, slow your roll dad.” Remus said holding out his hands, “Are you sure that you are able to travel?”

“Well, I’m not dead yet, am I?” Lyall chuckled and continued.

Remus sighed and took a step back to where his mom was. Hope smiled and put her arm around her son, “You can't fault his logic now can you?”

“Lets get this show on the road!” Lyall exclaimed before immediately grabbing his back in pain.

Remus chuckled before saying, “I’ll be waiting downstairs for you two.”

There was a hum of acknowledgement from his mum and then Remus headed downstairs. While he waited for his parents he looked at the things on the mantel. It had been a while since he had been there so he never really noticed the photos. There was a photo from their wedding way back when, a photo from his and Sirius’ wedding, a photo from Remus’ first and last days at Hogwarts as well as the kids. He smiled as he got to the very last photo on the mantel, he picked it up, a few tears coming to his eyes, it was a photo of him and his father fast asleep together on a rocking chair. To many it wouldn’t look like much but to Remus it was a reminder of how lucky he was to have his father in his life. Was he perfect? No. Were there some rough patches? Yes, but what mattered most was that he cared enough to want to make it better. He didn’t know how he would be the man he was today without his father always by his side.

“Reminiscing are ya chap?” Lyall commented from the staircase. He took a while to hobble towards Remus but when he did he wrapped his arm around him (Out of love or for needing support, Remus thought), “I always loved that photo of us.”

“Yeah dad.” Remus said smiling.

“Reminds me of how little you once were.” Lyall took a seat on the couch behind them, “Merlin you're so tall, when did you get this big?”

Remus smiled as he sank down into the seat next to him, instinctively he used his dads head as a headrest, “Dunno dad.”

The calmness and serenity of the room was interrupted by Hope running into the room,

“Up with you too, we’re going to be so late!” She exclaimed as she struggled to clasp a bracelet.

“There,” Remus took his moms wrist and fastened the bracelet, “Are you okay to apparate Dad?”

“Yes” Lyall nodded, “I’m alright.”

Remus nodded and within a second they were at the doorstep of potter manor. Remus stepped up and knocked on the door where he was greeted by Effie.

“Hello! Merry Christmas you three!” Effie smiled as she hugged them, “Come in! You guys are just in time to have lunch!”

“Granddad!” Alex exclaimed when he saw his granddad walk through the door.

“Merry Christmas kiddo!” Lyall wrapped his arms around his grandson, “Merlin have you gotten tall!”

“I missed you,” Alex smiled as he sunk into his grandfather.

As Lyall replies, “I missed you too,” Remus begins to tear up. He quickly retreats up the stairs and runs into their room. He opened the door to find his husband with a shirt half on. He shuts the door behind him and uses it to support his weight.

“Heyo! Merry Christmas- oh, Moony.” Sirius turned around after putting his shirt on. “You’re home quick.”
His expression faltered then became sombre, “Oh, Remus, did it-”
Remus sniffed as he wiped a couple tears beginning to form in the corner of his eye. “No, no. Its just-”
Remus huffs at how bizarre he felt in that moment as he sat down on the bed, “He’s doing really good.”
Sirius looked at his husband puzzled but he knew that Remus had more to say, so he joined him on the bed and coaxed Remus into lying down. After he threw a blanket and a comforting arm around his husband he said, “Whats bothering you about it? Talk me through it.”
Remus sighed, “I’m so scared of losing him an-and when I see him looking better and happier it just reminds me of everything I lose when he passes.”
Remus paused to wipe a few tears again as Sirius pulled him closer, “This must be so scary for you love, I’m so sorry.”
Remus’ breath trembled and then he continued, “And earlier I saw him with Alex and he looked so full of life. That can’t be a man who was on the brink of death.” There was a beat of silence before Remus began to properly cry, “I’m so scared, I don’t wanna lose him Sirius.”
Remus curled into himself, Sirius quickly grabbed his wand to cast a silencing charm for his husband's privacy and let Remus turn over so that he could bury his head in Sirius’ chest whilst he cried. They sat together for a while, Sirius not trying to offer his advice or any commentary knowing that it was not what Remus needed. Remus was the first to break the silence, “Do I look alright?”
“For someone who was sobbing 5 seconds ago, pretty good.” Sirius cracked a light joke.
Remus laughed as Sirius undid the charms. Once Remus had composed himself he pulled his husband into a quick kiss, which had quickly turned into a second, much longer kiss.
“Oi! Quit shagging and get downstairs!” Marlene shouted at the two of them, “Time for breakfast!”
The two laughed as they broke away. They got up and looked in the mirror as they adjusted clothes and fixed hair.
Remus ran his fingers through his hair, “Does my hair look alright?”
“You look beautiful Moony,” Sirius held his arm out for his husband, “Shall we?”
Remus smiled and took his husband's arm as they left their room and headed down the stairs to their family.
The rest of the day was amazing, it was the greatest Christmas any of them had had in a long time. After swapping presents they all hung out together in the living room where they were just able to enjoy their company together.
“I’m going to get you back for that one!” Hermione exclaimed as she picked up 16 new Uno cards. She sifted through her cards as a grin tugged at her lips before putting one down. The communism card.
“Fear me.”
Remus chuckled to himself before he took a deep breath as he looked around at his family
“They’ve got my back, I’m going to be alright” Remus thought to himself.