How to French
Regulus swore he wouldn’t go to the astronomy tower. He wasn’t going to bend to the wills of James Potter, for fuck’s sake. Maybe even not going to the tower might help put off the crush he had on him. He was stronger than that, he-
He found himself at the door of the astronomy tower that night.
Putain (Fuck). He cursed himself for being so weak to James. He hated it, but what could he do? With a sigh, he pushed open the door.
A yelp from his right startled him, and he had his wand out in a flash. “Remus?” He asked in disbelief. Sure enough, the gentle glow of the lamp above the, lit up the werewolf’s features, tired and equally surprised.
“Um, hey,” Remus said awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. Regulus slowly put away his wand, still staring at the other. He was wearing a maroon jumper that Regulus was pretty sure he’d seen Sirius wear yesterday, and he was holding what looked to be ripped pieces of paper.
As if tracking his gaze, Remus held up the piece of paper. “I found scraps of paper Sirius wrote on, but it’s all in French,” he said. Regulus looked at him in confusion.
“Why would you care?” Regulus asked, blunt as ever. Remus didn’t seem fazed, however. Instead, he simply held the pieces of paper out to Regulus.
“I usually wouldn’t, but um, I can recognise some of the words you know? It’s just…interesting, I guess? I was curious,” Remus explained, doing a pretty bad job of hiding the fact that he was just jealous.
Regulus read over the pieces of paper. Il est vraiment magnifique (He’s so beautiful). Putain de délicieux comma ça (Fucking stupidly good in that). En fair, j’ai peut être besoin d’aide (Might actually need help). C’est criminel que quelqu’un soit aussi attentionné (It should be criminal for someone to be this caring). So basically Sirius thirsting over Remus, Regulus concluded, not bothering to read the rest. He glanced at Remus, who fidgeted with the hem of his jumper.
With a reluctant sigh, he translated the words. Each new translation seemed to leave Remus more and more confused, and probably jealous, if the hand slowly tightening on the jumper was anything to go by. When he was finished, trying not to gag at his brother’s thirsting, which he frankly didn’t need or want to know - quite the opposite in fact; silence filled the air.
“If you ask me who it’s about, I will murder you,” Regulus says, already guessing what the Gryffindor was about to ask. Remus snapped his mouth shut.
As the silence stretched on, Regulus finally relented. “Do you remember when you four dyed everyone’s hair the colour of their house?” He asked, recalling that particular event with a shudder. When Remus nodded, he continued. “I said Sirius wanted to shag one of you, remember?”
Remus paused, then gave a slow nod, eyebrows furrowed with thought. Regulus silently let him work it out, and it was comical watching the realisation slowly dawning on him. Although, how did Remus not even notice it?
“Holy shit,” the other blurted, eyes wide, staring off somewhere into the distance. “Holy shit. What am I even supposed to do now?”
Regulus stifled a small smile seeing the panicked werewolf. “Confess to him?” He replied, raising an eyebrow. Wasn’t that obvious?
“How?”
“Like a normal person.”
“You are not helping.”
“Oh, was I supposed to? I’m afraid I didn’t get the memo.”
“Shut up, Mr in-love-with-James-Potter.”
Regulus blinks, ignoring the light flush that had decided to make itself known. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he says instead.
Remus gives him an amused look. “You don’t?”
Regulus weighs his options. On one hand, he could just admit the truth. On another, he could continue to deny. But it was getting harder and harder to deny his embarrassing crush, and well, Remus likely wasn’t going to back down. He would just be saving himself the trouble of it all.
“Fine,” he conceded, giving Remus a blank stare.
Remus stared back. “What. What do you mean fine?” He asked, clearly shocked that Regulus had agreed without much of a fight.
“You know what I mean,” he said, refusing to explain any further. It was embarrassing enough as it is, he wasn’t going to spell it out for Remus. Remus seemed to accept this, just nodding in response.
He stood up, brushing himself off as he took the papers back from Regulus. There was a look of determination in his eyes. Something about his demeanour made Regulus have a strange feeling that, yeah, Remus was right for Sirius. He could trust that Remus wouldn’t hurt him. Even so, he couldn’t help but speak up. “Hurt him and I’ll make sure even God won’t find your body,” he spoke lazily. The singular chime of the clock seemed to emphasise his words.
Remus gives a short bark of laughter. “I won’t hurt him. I swear. Cross my heart and hope to die…” He trailed off, looking expectantly at Regulus, who just looked back blankly. He sighed. “Stick a needle in my eye,” he finished the phrase.
Regulus made a face. That was a morbid way of swearing something. Then again, it was weirder for witches and wizards. Hands bound, incantations, ‘I do’s, and dying if you broke the swear. Oh and who could forget the pain if you come close to the deadline, or breaking the swear? Almost like a marriage, Regulus had always thought. Just a lot darker.
He nodded at Remus, who jokingly saluted back. With that, the Gryffindor left, leaving Regulus alone on the astronomy tower-
Wait. Regulus looked around in confusion. Where the fuck was James? It was almost one a.m. James had even been the one to initiate this meet-up, so where the fuck was he? Was Regulus being stood up? Was that what this was? A joke?
The thought seemed to make his blood grow colder. He stood up, giving one last look around, even though he and Remus had been the only ones there since he’d arrived. Why did he even bother looking around? All this was was a waste of time. With a grimace, he turned, leaving the tower.