“Boy do I love him,” Deadpool sighed, his mask doing heart eyes as Spiderman walked into the Avengers meeting.
We know, you never shut the fuck up about it
Maybe if you did something about it we’d care
“What can I say, he’s not interested,” Deadpool muttered solemnly. “I’ve done everything short of fucking him.”
Tell him you love him
“I did! He thought I meant as a friend.”
Confess again retard
“Hey, it’s not okay to say that.”
Confess again, you pathetic worthless idiotic dumbass
“That’s better, thank you.”
Kiss him
“I fucking have! He thought it was a ‘platonic kiss’ whatever the fuck that is.” They kissed very occasionally, always short and without any passion, but it makes Deadpool weak in the knees every time then guilty for taking advantage of what Peter considered to be an act of friendship. “If he was asexual we would be basically dating, but I know that he’s interested in sex. God do I wanna fuck him.” His eyes were locked on Peter’s ass clade in blue spandex, the material bunching at the cleft where his thighs met his ass. He looked up and Iron man was staring daggers into him. He held his hands up in surrender and leaned back onto the couch, inspecting his gloves. Geez that old geezer treated Peter like his son, one that was too pure for this world and definitely Deadpool.
Peter finished up his conversation and turned around to lock eyes with Wade. His heart pounded as he could tell Peter smiled and very cutely hurriedly skipped over to Wade and jumped onto him. Wade wrapped him up in his arms tight, laughing as Peter settled into the spot next to him with their bodies still pressed against each other.
“Hey, baby boy.”
“Hello, father.” Wade groaned.
“No no, it’s daddy.”
“I’d rather die than call you that.” Peter had one leg draped over Wade and his arms wrapped around Wade’s as his hand gently squeezed/massaged Peter’s thigh.
“You’ll come around.”
“Never,” Peter said deftly. “Constant vigilance,” he growled, Wade laughing at the worst Batman impression he’s seen today, which was saying something because he had somehow seen 6 already.
“Justice-”
“For Gotham!” They growled out together, smiling and giggling with each other, making the entire Avengers team feel like a third wheel. They muttered and giggled throughout the entire meeting. Peter knew everything anyway because he worked with Iron Man to come up with the plan in the first place, and Wade knew everything because Peter would ask for his opinion. Their appearance was basically for show.
They got lunch together afterward, then patrolled, then went back to Wade’s flat to play on his game console, then went to Peter’s to eat and sleep. This was a repeat for everyday. Peter went to school, Wade did some of his own work, then they’d come together to eat and hang out, rarely was there a day they weren’t together in one form or another. It was driving Wade crazy because Peter was insanely affectionate. Whenever they were together they were touching, cuddled up together on the couch, knees touching while eating, playing footsies under the table, linking arms when they walked, giving each other piggy-back rides, snuggling at night fighting over big spoon and little spoon, massaging each other when they were particularly sore, cleaning each other’s wounds, the list goes on. Wade even combs and occasionally cuts Peter’s hair.
.
.
.
They had another Avenger’s meeting, Peter and Wade pulling up together, walking down the long hallways of stark tower shoulders brushing together, hands grabbing biceps with every wheeze of laughter. Wade couldn’t believe how lucky he was to have this little spider in his life.
“Hey,” Clint said, pulling Wade away when the pair walked into the room. Peter signaled he was going to sit down and let Wade break off to talk to Clint. “You and Spiderman, huh?” They looked over to Peter flopping onto the couch, pulling out his phone and scrolling.
“What about us?” Clint gave him a bored look and Wade groaned, switching to sign. ‘Nothing’
‘He’s interested.’
‘He’s not’
'He is’
‘What makes you think that?’ Clint’s hands twitched, thinking of what to sign next.
‘He is.’ Wade groaned.
‘No.’
‘He’s the happiest when he’s with you, even under the mask I can see the way he looks at you.’
‘We’re best friends, hero business partners, of course we are close.’
‘What about how much he is all over you?’ Wade furrowed his brows. ‘Peter hates physical touch but is always touching you in some way or another.’
‘Peter’s like that with everyone.’ The shock on Clint’s face made him think that maybe he was wrong.
‘Pete hates physical touch or attention from everyone except you it seems.’ Wade furrowed his brows in thought, he prided himself in his observation skills, there is no way he wouldn’t have picked it up if Peter didn't like people touching him.
‘Who would like someone they don't know touching them?’ Wade ventured, playing devil’s advocate.
‘He’s close with me, revealed his identity to me and everything, he gives me a wide berth if I even walk past him in the hallways.’ Wade didn’t believe him, Peter was always cuddled up to someone, it just so happened to usually be himself since they did everything together. ‘Watch,’ he signed, walking towards Peter.
“Spidey!” He cheered, Peter looking up from his phone. “How’s my second favorite spider?” Clint plopped onto the couch next to him and Peter nonchalantly scooted as close to the arm of the couch as he could get.
“Good, good,” Peter responded. “How about yourself?”
“Oh you know, living the dream.” He looked to Wade and nodded to the other side of him, “Joining us Pool?” Peter looked so devastated even under the mask Wade was tempted to beat Hawkeye within an inch of his life, no wait that was the boxes Wade wouldn’t do that to a friend. But still, he was tempted to call it all off, but cruel as it was to put Peter in an unknown experiment, he needed to know. He sat down on the other side, Clint separating the pair.
They were silent this meeting, Wade not listening and focusing on his peripheral vision of Clint and Peter. Peter was relaxed but leaned as far from Clint as he could without it appearing odd. No knees touched, no whispers in each other’s ears, no contact of any kind. Clint would lean over and mumble something, and Peter would huff a laugh and nod, but nothing ever came of it.
The meeting ended and Clint rushed up to ask Tony a question, letting the pair reunite. Peter didn’t say anything but scooted over where Clint was sitting and cuddled up to Wade. He slung his knees over Wade’s lap and leaned in to whisper in his ear, teasing Clint about the couple of “old man” jokes he made during the presentation. Pete’s arm was resting heavily but comfortable on Wade’s shoulder, his fingers picking at the seam in his suit. Wade was laughing, Peter snickering in his ear all the jokes he wanted to say during the presentation.
His eyes met Clint's and he gave Wade an ‘I told you so’ smirk.
.
.
.
“So Petey?” Peter looked up from his computer, his fingers still typing out the end of his thought. “You like Clint, right?”
“Huh?” Peter furrowed his brows, “Yeah, of course I do.”
“But like, you guys are friends, right?” Peter quirked up his brow.
“Yeah! He’s like, one of my fav.” His eyes darted back down to the screen, the clicking sound of the keyboard resuming.
“More than Iron man?”
“Different. Mr. Stark is like my mentor. Clint is the guy I go to the corner store with after we steal Mr. Stark’s card.”
“Are you guys close?” Peter sighed, not frustrated, just marking the end of one task and moving to another. He pushed himself fully from his laptop, signaling his attention was solely on Wade.
“Clint and I are buddies, we go patrolling together occasionally, work missions together, midnight snack at the tower on overnight stays, all that stuff. Why?”
“You don’t seem to like touching him.” Peter furrowed his brows.
“I don't like touching anybody,” he said as if it were obvious. I guess to anyone else it was.
“You like touching me.” Peter flushed a beautiful color red, so quickly Wade almost didn't catch the way it started at his collarbones and worked its way up.
“Yeah,” Peter said flatly, quietly, with no intention of elaboration.
“I didn’t know that.”
“I thought you did.” The room was quiet, the fridge hummed and the floorboards above them creaked.
“How am I different,” Wade managed to ask, his nerves suddenly getting the best of him.
“I don’t like him in that way.”
“What way?” Wade asked desperately, a want and need in him breaking through all the shells of his core. He wanted it to be true, he wanted all those subtle signs he ignored to be exactly what his delusion was trying to tell him it was.
“Don’t mess with me, Pool,” Peter said firmly. “You can tease all you want but don’t tease me about that.” This sentence was different, all the bark had left his voice.
“I’m sorry, I feel like I’m missing something here. You like me ?” Peter nodded. “You like me like that ?”
“Are you telling me you didn’t know?!”
“NO! Of course I didn’t! Why would I know that!”
“Your whole job is reading people and figuring them out, I thought you had figured it out!”
“Petey,” Wade whined, burying his face in his hands. “You tellin me you’ve liked me this whole time?”
“I don’t know about the whole time, maybe the last year or so.” Wade almost started crying.
“A YEAR!? PETER!”
“What?! Why are you yelling at me.”
“I’m not yelling,” Wade said, lowering his voice several octaves. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“It’s embarrassing! I sent out signals and it never seemed like you picked up on them.”
“Peter, I’ve kissed you.”
“Platonically,” Peter added.
“NOT PLATONICALLY! Everything we’ve done together has not been platonic on my part at all! I’ve been trying to woo you this entire time and thought I was just piss at it.”
“Oh.”
“You telling me I could’ve been having fistfuls of spidey ass for a year now?”
“I don’t know if I’d word it like that,” Peter said innocently.
“I’m telling you right now, this kiss is not platonic in any way.” He marched towards Peter, pulling him up into his arms and connecting their lips. Peter gasped into the kiss, recovering and kissing back as enthusiastically. Wade whined, trying to taste everything he could inside Peter’s mouth.
“Baby boy, you drive me crazy.” Peter giggled, giddy from the kiss. He pressed a succession of quick kisses to his lips, trailing down to his neck where he watched in real-time as the hickeys faded. He made a disappointed noise, peering up at Wade with puppy dog eyes. “I'm sorry baby,” Wade said, as if it were his fault. “Guess I'll have to mark you up instead.” Wade bit into the skin of his neck, scooping the boy up so his legs wrapped around Wade's hips.
“I have work tomorrow,” Peter gasped.
“Good, you can show them what a good lover you have.” Peter accepted his fate of wearing a turtleneck or hoodie to work tomorrow and squeezed his legs tight, flushing their groins together and earning a groan from Wade. “Be careful baby or you won't be going to work at all tomorrow.”
“I can take a sick day,” Peter gasped, Wade marking where he could reach with his shirt in the way.
“Take a sick week, we have a year’s worth of catch-up.”