Crying
“Kevin?” the voice called out again, becoming much clearer this time…
Just then the Professor appeared in front of us, floating, with his feet barely touching the ground.
“Professor?” we both said at the same time.
“Are…are you two, okay?” he asked looking between us.
We looked at each other and then we both turned to him and shrugged.
“Yeah” we said at the same time again.
“Kevin, it’s time for you to leave Morph’s body, okay?” he said looking between us concerned.
“Who’s Morph?” he asked.
“That’s my code name,” I explained. “Fits me better than Kevin most days, especially when I look like this” I said as I shifted myself into an Italian model wearing a long evening dress. “Or this” I said as I changed myself into a blond wearing a nurse’s uniform. “Sometimes I even feel like this” I said as I changed myself into a little barely 5ft tall waitress wearing a red apron.
“Oh” he said nodding his head in understanding. “I always thought your mind was more relaxed than others. I go into other people’s heads and their thoughts are so rigid. I liked your mind much better” he said.
“Well thank you” I said with a proud smile as I shifted back into my base form.
“Kevin, why don’t you come out of Morph’s body, and you and I can talk” Professor Xavier said as gently as he could while he held out his hands to him.
MacTaggert turned to me and then back to the Professor.
“Do…do I have to?” he asked sounding like a child again.
“Kevin, Morph has been unconscious and unresponsive for the last seven hours, you have to leave and let them go” the Professor said sounding a little desperate now.
“Them?” he asked confused.
“I’m not entirely male or female all the time, they/them suits me better, especially when I can shift and change in the blink of an eye” I explained.
“Oh, that makes sense” he said nodding again.
“Wait, did you say several hours or seven hours?” I asked turning back to the Professor.
“Seven hours,” he repeated. “Your heart rate and blood pressure have been erratic, you have been convulsing and crying, and we’re all worried about you” he said.
“All?” I asked.
“Yes, we received a message from Rogue asking for help, and we came as fast as we could, we’re here waiting for you to wake up” he said with a soft worried look on his face.
“Ev…everyone?” I asked, no doubt blushing as I waited anxiously for his answer, the space around us becoming warmer all of a sudden.
He paused for a moment and looked apprehensive.
“Most of us” he said evasively.
But I didn’t need him to explain much further.
“Oh” I said as I crossed my arms and ducked my eyes away from his.
“You okay?” MacTaggert asked looking at me worriedly.
“It’s…It’s nothing” I said as I tried to shrug it off. “Of course, I’m half tempted to let you drive my body around for a while” I said bitterly under my breath.
“Could I!?” he asked excitedly looking between the two of us.
“I don’t think that would be a good idea for either of you” the Professor said in his stern voice that I had heard many times over the year… just before I was about to get myself into trouble.
“Aww come on I’ll be careful with him…them” he quickly corrected.
“Kevin” the Professor said, and I knew from the deeper tone that he was getting low on patience. “The last time you were in Sean’s body he had to stay in the emergency ward recovering for hours, and you were only in possession of his body for a few minutes” The Professor said worriedly.
A strange mixture of MacTaggert’s thoughts of possessing and leaving Sean’s body, and the Professor’s memories of him laying in a bed being monitored, floated in front of us at the same time.
“Please Kevin, you need to leave” the Professor said in an urgent voice.
MacTaggert looked down with this upset and defeated look on his face and in his sagging shoulders.
But I knew the Professor was right…
“Well… Afraid the ride’s over, all ashore who’s going ashore” I said as I shifted myself into a ship’s captain.
He laughed at that as I shifted back into my base form.
“Thank you for helping me” he said as he wrapped his arms around me in a big bear hug.
“You remember what I told you” I said as I hugged him back. “Be that child your mother loved” I said as I released him.
He let go of me and then went walking over to the Professor.
A second later the two of them vanished and everything around me went dark.
I blinked open my eyes, and there the two of them were standing over me, smiling down at me, a small, tired smile spreading across my face as I looked up at the both of them.
“Sorry about all that” MacTaggert said as I sat up on the bed I was laying on.
‘MacTaggert I have got to give him a shorter name’ I thought as I sat up and clutched my head.
That name was way too long for a head as sore as mine to be dealing with.
I no sooner sat up, when I felt my aching body get wrapped up in a big bear hug.
“Shuga you alright?” Rogue asked as she squeezed me.
“I was” I said as I strained to get some air into my squished lungs.
“You scared the daylights out of me” she said as she let me go and I gasped for air.
“Morph!” Jubilee said as she came in and hugged me next.
“It is good to see you well again” Ororo said as she came up and hugged me along with Jubilee.
Thankfully the two of them were a lot gentler than Rogue.
“Although I share in the excitement of the others, I think it would be best for you to lie back down and get some more rest” Hank said at the end of the bed.
“Why don’t you and I go someplace quiet and talk” the Professor said to MacTaggert as he moved his chair up next to him.
“Better you than me Professor” Rogue said, crossing her arms and looking over at MacTaggert with a disapproving glare.
“You can say that again” Jubilee said turning to him with her own glare.
Guess it’s up to me to help make things right.
“Before you go Professor, I think someone has something to say to Magneto” I said looking over at MacTaggert.
Seriously I needed to find a shorter name for him…
He looked at me confused for a second, and then he looked over at Erik with an apprehensive look.
“Go on” I said waving him over to Erik with a reassuring smile.
“I’m…I’m sorry” he said, keeping his eyes down as he spoke.
“For…” I said, prompting him to go on.
“I’m sorry I attacked you, I…I blamed you for my ma’s death” he said blushing now.
“Your mother?” Erik said, going from defensive to confused in a matter of seconds.
“This is Kevin MacTaggert” Charles said introducing him. “He is… was… Moira MacTaggert’s son” he explained, the loss of her still clearly hurting him.
“I see” Erik said, his eyes filling with pity for the boy. “I am sorry for your loss” he said, his words somehow sounding strong and strained at the same time.
“Erik had nothing to do with your mother’s death Kevin” the Professor tried to explain.
“Who’s Erik?” he asked looking down at the Professor confused.
“Oh, that’s his real name” I said pointing to Erik.
“Don’t you all get tired of knowing each other by two different names?” he asked scratching his head.
“Better than having our enemies know our true identities and those of our loved ones” Erik said, crossing his arms and looking more like a military leader now.
“As I was saying” the Professor said, clearly wanting to stop Erik before he got started. “What happened to Moira wasn’t his fault.”
“I know, Morph explained everything to me” he said looking at me with a grateful smile.
I smiled back with a small smile.
“Why don’t you lie down and rest Morph” the Professor said as he looked me over with concern.
“If you don’t mind Professor, I think I’ll take Hippocrates’ advice on medicine this time around” I said.
“Which one?” Hank asked looking excited and curious.
“The one about food” I said with a smile.
“Ah, yes, ‘Let food be thy medicine, and medicine thy food’ a very practical bit of advice” Hank said with a fond smile as if he was remembering an old friend rather than a textbook.
“Could we eat too?”
I turned to look behind me and was surprised to see Roberto standing behind me on the other side of the bed along with Kurt.
“Roberto, Morph just got up from a coma and you can only think about your stomach” Jubilee said looking at him in disbelief.
“Well, me starving doesn’t help Morph any” he said with a small grin and a nervous chuckle.
“A repast does sound quite enjoyable right now” Hank said next.
“A meal with friends and family is always enjoyable” Kurt said as he hopped up onto the end of the bed I was sitting on.
“Umm…if I could just ask…” Hank said clearing his throat like he was nervous. “Which one of you three is doing the cooking?”
Now I know why he was nervous.
“I did all the cooking” I said.
The whole room irrupted with sighs of relief…and I’m pretty sure Kurt was thanking his god with copious amounts of gratitude.
“Could I have some food too?” MacTaggert asked looking to the Professor.
“Sure Tag, the more the merrier” I said as I got up and went for the door.
“Tag?” he said looking at me funny.
“I’m too tired to call you MacTaggert, and after having you in my head all day calling you Kevin feels all kinds of weird right now” I explained.
“Tag… I like it” he said with a smile.
“Come on then Tag, let’s show this lot where the kitchen is” I said going out the door with him not to far behind.
<><><><><>
I got into the kitchen and started reheating food for everyone… Jubilee and Roberto, not really feeling patient, got into one of the containers and started eating from it together right then and there.
“You sure made a lot of food Morph” Roberto said just before he took in another fork full of food.
“Yeah, were you expecting to have to survive the apocalypse or something” Jubilee asked.
“Something similar,” I said under my breath.
Erik, who was standing next to me drinking from a glass of water, started coughing and choking when he heard me say that.
“What was that?” asked Rogue in a threatening tone.
“I said there’s plenty of dinner, help yourselves” I said as I pulled out some plates for everyone along with spoons to dish everything out.
Everyone took a little of everything and sat down to eat. Except for Ororo, she wanted to go to the jet and let the others know that everything was okay now.
“Everyone or just Forge?” Jubilee said jokingly, causing Ororo to blush.
That’s when it felt like everything around me had shifted…
I saw Jubilee and Roberto, two young people in love, glancing at each other, blushing and smiling like they were the only two people in the world.
I saw Rogue reaching over and taking a hold of Erik’s hand, the two gloved hands resting comfortably on the table, the two of them waiting for the moment when they could go someplace for themselves and touch each other the way lovers were meant to.
Ororo talking to Forge, thousands of miles separating the two of them and somehow the space between them just melting away as they spent whatever time they could together in whatever way they could.
I could imagine Scott and Jean back at the mansion together. They were about as sickeningly perfect as a Hallmark Movie couple, but they had each other, happily married and trying to fix the world so they could have the happily ever after to go with their perfect marriage…
Even Hank, the worlds smartest man, had fallen for one of Bastion’s minions, and if there was anyone who could pull her away from the dark side and into the light it would be him.
The Professor who was able to find love in his life at least three times that we knew of – and the last love he had was an alien empress!
Kurt had his god to love, but I wasn’t sure if he was celibate like the monks he had lived with or if that was just how he lived there at the monastery. But if he did want to find himself a life partner, he wouldn’t have any trouble finding someone. He was so quiet and caring with a spark for life that was addictive.
Logan…
He had had a lot of women in his long life… And I’m sure there would be plenty of other women who would be happy to have him…
And then there was me wasn’t there?
Just me…
I looked down at my plate and suddenly the food on it didn’t look all that appealing to me.
Ororo came back in about then and sat down to join us for dinner, telling all of us that the others were fine and that they expected us all back by tomorrow.
“My father will be coming in tomorrow” Tag said to the Professor. “We’ll be going through my ma’s stuff together before we head back to the mainland” he explained, causing a heavy silence to fall around the table.
“We’ll be sure to be out of your way before then, won’t we Hank” the Professor said turning to him.
“Yes, if we split into teams, we could…”
He went on about what needed to be done and who might be best to do it.
Everyone broke into conversations about this and that – the work that needed to be done, the latest news (especially about Creed and how he was doing in the polls or the speeches he was making).
Hank talked about Bastian’s victims, how this country or that country was trying out tests to get the people infected by the techno-organic virus back to normal, and he talked about some of the promising research that they were doing… Whether or not anyone understood what he was saying was anyone’s guess…
I just sat there, quietly picking at my food while they talked.
A part of me wanted to go back to my room and be alone, maybe even cry for a bit…
But they had all come here to help me, and I didn’t feel right leaving them all, or going to my room and having them all worry about me.
Besides it was nice listening to them all talk.
When I was taken by Sinister there would be these long-drawn-out nights and days where I didn’t hear anything but silence, everything quiet enough for his words to echo in my mind as he slowly brainwashed me, trying to come up with something or other to experiment on me, to see if he could make me more compliant, taking this or that sample of blood, skin or bone to play with in his lab…
I would imagine my friends there talking to me, imagine being back with them, sitting down with the Professor or Hank talking about this or that, listening to Ororo as she would command the weather to do her bidding in her rich strong voice, Scott and Jean as they cooked together or cleaned together, laughing about this or that… sitting down outside with Logan just the two of us, imagining the silence was us looking up at the stars together.
As time went on it became harder and harder to hear them.
After a while all I could hear was Sinister’s voice…
“If you want the pain to stop just do as I want and destroy your friends. After all they had no problem destroying you… They had no problem leaving you for dead…”
I noticed my hand twitching and took a few deep breaths before anyone else noticed. My mind going back to that wonderful moment when Sinister went from this large imposing villain to the crypt keeper’s father… A large part of me wondering if he was a dead pile of dust now…
I looked around and saw that everyone had stopped eating, and I quietly started to collect the plates, but Ororo was having none of it.
“You should rest Morph; I can wash the dishes” she said as she tried to take the pile from me.
“It’s all right Ororo, I can handle a few dirty dishes” I said holding on to the dishes as tight as I could.
“You shouldn’t overdo it shuga” Rogue said, causing everyone at the table to look up at me.
“You are already looking a little wilted” Ororo said quietly in my ear.
Which was her way of saying I was starting to melt.
My skin and muscles would always start melting on my body and my bones would go weak when I was tired or worn out.
(I honestly looked a little bit like the Wicked Witch of the West melting in the rain when that happened).
I looked around at the others and I hated when they looked at me like that –
Like I was fragile and ready to fall apart… Or melt apart as the case usually was…
It just reminded me that I wasn’t who I used to be.
Reminded me that I was broken and that I would always be treated differently.
I was about to protest again when the Professor saved me from myself by speaking up.
“I think Jubilee and Roberto should do the dishes” he said in a tone that left no room for debating. “Especially since they went and bought a new arcade game with the schools building funds” he added looking at them with a critical look that I was glad to not be a part of.
“You didn’t” I said shocked… And slightly impressed.
“It was an honest mistake” Jubilee said frantically defending herself. “I was just looking at them on the computer, I had no idea I had actually ordered the thing!” she said, and I somehow believed her.
After all no one would buy something as big as an arcade game and expect to hide it so no one at the mansion would find out about it… Right?
“It must have been my powers affecting the computer” she said vehemently.
“In any case, I’m sure you two can make up for the mishap, and the return delivery charges, by doing some dishes for a while” the Professor said in his slightly disappointed, forced patience tone that I had heard many times over the years.
“Why do I have to do dishes? I’m innocent” Roberto protested next.
“You pulled it up on the computer to show me” Jubilee said pointing an accusing finger at him.
“Oh right” he said as if that little detail had totally escaped his mind.
“As I said, the both of you will do dishes” the Professor said calmly, but with a deadly edge to it. “Most likely for the foreseeable future” he added on, causing the two of them to slump in their chairs.
“Works for me” I said as I laid the pile of dirty dishes down in front of them.
“An excellent solution” Hank said laying down his dishes in front of them next.
“I couldn’t agree more” Ororo said as she laid the empty serving bowl down in front of them.
“You two should get into trouble more often” Rogue said as she and Erik when to leave.
“Kevin” the Professor said, causing me to turn to him, before I realized he was talking to Tag. “Why don’t you and I get out of their way and let them work, and you and I can go someplace quiet and have a talk” he said leading the way to one of the doors to lead them outside.
“Yes Professor” Tag said, looking about as sullen as Jubilee and Roberto as he followed the Professor outside.
The rest of us left not long after that and went off to our rooms.
I went to mine and fell down to my bed with a heavy sigh. I laid there for what felt like ages trying my best to fall asleep.
I finally gave up and buried my head in my pillow and cried…
I cried over Logan and what he had said to me that night in the woods…
I cried about losing Moira and Sean…
I cried over losing my mom…
I even cried over Remy…
I wasn’t one of those macho types who hated crying, but I wasn’t the sort to cry over spilled milk either, but right now I was sick and tired of losing people around me and feeling so alone and broken all the time – I think it was at that point that I started crying over the fact that I just couldn’t stop crying…
I just laid there and buried my face into my pillow as tight as I could so I could be as quiet as possible – The others were so happy and content despite everything, and I didn’t want to weigh them all down with my emotional hang-ups
Okay, so maybe Jubilee and Roberto were probably miserable right now, but they at least had each other…
And that’s when I started crying about the fact that I was miserable and crying all by myself with no one to share the pain with…
I don’t know how long I was like that, but something strange happened after a while – I felt better…
The tears stopped, my lungs heaved and collapsed trying to get air back into them, and even though my head was killing me, and my heart was pounding away, I felt better…
A long time ago when I was young, I had broken one of the school’s windows and I had shifted myself into a girl and ran for it.
(I would have changed into the Principle like I had before, but since it was the Principle I was running away from, that didn’t seem like the best idea…)
Anyway, I had turned myself into a girl and ran off to one of the girls’ bathrooms. And while I was hiding in one of the stalls, I overheard a bunch of girls talking to each other and I remember one of the girls saying ‘I’ll be fine, I just need a good cry.’
I didn’t understand that at all, how could crying feel good?
I remember thinking that it was a good thing I decided to be a boy all the time because girls may have had great clothes and smelled a lot better (and were usually smarter), but they had some strange ideas.
(There were a lot of other reasons I liked being a boy back then or being a man now, but that didn’t have anything to do with anything right now).
It wasn’t until my mom passed away that I understood what those girls meant all those years ago.
It hurt to lose my mom, and it kind of hurt my head and body to cry so much, but there was something deep down in my heart that felt better after I cried…
Of course, then my dad came along and told me that ‘he understood why I was crying so much, but sooner or later I would have to stop because boys don’t cry, especially ones my age.’
I tried not to cry after that and tried to be funny and laugh all the time, thinking that’s what he wanted. But he just seemed to be more distant after that…
A year later he dropped me off at Professor Xavier’s school and I never saw him again.
But I kept trying to be the happy one, tried to not be too serious, tried to be friendly with everyone because it’s what I had promised my mom, and I certainly never cried.
I didn’t even cry all that much after I had been freed from Sinister’s mind control device.
(I probably should have).
But it wasn’t until just now that I remembered how good it was to cry once in a while, to let it all out and get rid of all the negative stuff that was stuck inside me.
After my breathing was back to normal and my heart wasn’t pounding so hard, I felt my body sink into the bed…
Which meant, with an exhausted sigh, I had to get up and get the pills the Professor and Hank had made up for me. They were made out of a special blend of salt, calcium, chalk, and a few other minerals, I took them with a glass of water, and it helped stop my body from melting and sagging on my bones.
Once I was back in bed, I breathed in deeply letting the feel of relief flood every molecule of my body before I closed my tired eyes and fell into the deepest, most relaxing sleep I had had in years.
<><><><><>
We worked pretty hard the next day.
Erik took apart the computers we needed. Hank and I got all the components we needed, and then Erik put everything back the way it was supposed to be. Wash, rinse and repeat.
Until we got to the record archives, then we lost Hank to ‘an abundance of possibilities,’ as he put it.
He wanted to make copies of all the information that Moira had collected over the years treating and helping mutants. The Professor thought it was a good idea. Better to have the knowledge than have it lost he said, but I kind of wondered if he wanted to save everything he could of Moira to remember her by, and having anything that might help other mutants was icing on the cake. But I wasn’t one to judge, and the Professor was right, there could be stuff in there too valuable to be lost in corrupted data.
So, while Hank was working on that, Erik and I worked on gathering up the other things we needed.
Rogue and Storm went around the building and grabbed anything that we needed for the mansion – Most of it for the infirmary, but they found a few things for defense too.
Kurt would pop in to help whoever he could – Hank one minute, us the next, Rogue and Storm after that for a while, he even talked to Tag with the Professor.
Jubilee and Roberto…
I’m not sure what they did…
I saw them eating in the kitchen about an hour ago, but other than that I barely saw them all day.
Oh well; so long as they weren’t causing any trouble, right?
The Professor spent most of the day talking with Tag or checking in on Hank and his progress.
By lunchtime we were all finished. In fact, we figured by the time we loaded up the jets we’d be able to get back home before dinner.
The idea of getting back to the mansion really had us moving at top speed and we were packed within the hour…
Of course, most of that probably had to do with the fact that most everything was packed in something metal, which meant that Erik did most of the moving for us. And then Rogue took care of most everything else, flying back and forth like she was a tennis ball in a pro match.
Hank called the Professor back to the archives just about then, saying he had found something he had to look at for himself.
“I wonder what he found” Ororo asked looking up at them curiously.
“Most likely something we’ll never understand without a Ph.D” I said turning back to see if Rogue or Erik were tired and need any relief.
“Maybe it is something that could help the afflicted primes Bastian made victims out of” Kurt said with a gleam of hope in his eyes that I wish I was capable of having.
“Anything’s possible,” Ororo said optimistically.
I didn’t want to say anything, but I highly doubted it – Moira wasn’t working with techno-viruses when I was here last, the odds of her working on anything that could help all those victims before going to Genosha were slim to none…
“Morph?”
I turned around to see Tag.
“What’s up?” I asked, grateful for the sudden distraction.
“Could I…could I ask you something before you go?” he asked nervously.
“Of course,” I said, my curiosity piqued now.
“Could I… could I be in your head as you go flying?” he asked with a hopeful look in his eyes.
I turned to Ororo and the others.
“Anyone care if I go spread my wings for a bit?” I asked.
“I don’t see why not” Erik said as he moved another crate.
“You go enjoy yourself shuga” Rogue said as she floated above me before flying off to get the next thing to be loaded.
“Could we go too?” asked Jubilee with these big pleading eyes and a hopeful smile.
“I could fly too, make it a race if you like?” Roberto offered.
“Oh, this I would like to see” Kurt said excitedly.
I turned to Ororo, and gave her a shrug of my shoulders as I smiled knowingly at her.
“It’s all right with me if it’s all right with you” I said, not wanting to steal the lot of them away if they were really needed… but I knew what her answer was going to be.
“Okay” Ororo said with a nod. “But not too far out, I want you all close to the island” she said taking her job as a guardian seriously, even though most all of us were grown up.
(Of course, the lot of them were probably a little more grown up than I was – I couldn’t wait to get out there and show Roberto a thing or two).
“We’ll stay close” I promised as they ran off ahead and I went rushing off after them.
Well, the three of them went running, Kurt popped from spot to spot.
We made it out to the bluffs, Roberto stretching himself out while Jubilee looked at him like eye candy.
I remember being that young…
“I have to warn you Morph, I’m faster than most anything that can fly” Roberto said as he kept on stretching.
“Is that so?” I asked as I moved past him and towards the edge.
“I almost out flew a jet once” he said proudly.
“Almost?” Jubilee said looking at him confused.
“It got dark, the passengers would have seen me if I stayed out much longer” he explained.
“Not that you’re bragging about that or anything” Jubilee said with a playful smile.
“Nah, just stating a few facts so Morph knows what they’re getting into” he said as he jumped around a few times.
“So, you don’t think there’s anything in the world that you can out fly?” I asked with a playful smile of my own.
“None that I can think of” he said with a smile that I was desperate to wipe off his face.
“Not even you?” I said as I changed myself into him.
He baulked when I did that, causing Jubilee to laugh so hard she could barely catch her breath while Kurt covered his mouth and tried to hide how hard he was laughing.
“Freaky the first time, isn’t it?” Jubilee asked once she calmed down. “I got goosebumps the first time they changed into me” she said as she wiped a tear froming out of the corner of one of her eyes.
“This is going to be great” Tag said excitedly.
“My thoughts exactly” Kurt said in agreement.
“You aren’t nervous are you chapa?” I asked with a big confident smile.
“No” he said boldly…before he looked at me confused. “I didn’t know you knew Portuguese” he said.
“I didn’t, not until I changed into you” I explained.
“You can learn someone’s language just by changing into them?” Kurt asked in disbelief.
“When I get close enough to someone, I can read their thoughts. Not like the Professor or Jean, and definitely not like Tag here, but enough that I can copy their unique way of speaking, acting, even a few memories if they’re new enough. You know the stuff that helps you act like them and talk like them, but not much else” I explained.
“I never knew that” Jubilee said as she put her hands on her hips.
“You never asked amiga” I said, my skin starting to tingle from the rays of the sun. “Are you ready to go?” I asked as I copied his solar energy, and my body turned dark as the lines around me filled with a fiery light.
“Let’s do this” Roberto said as he lit up with his own powers.
“Tag, you hang back in my mind” I said to him. “Jubilee, you tell us when to go” I said as I floated up into the air. “Roberto, we make this simple, we go out to mainland” I said pointing out to the line of the mainland in the distance. “We round the lighthouse, and we come back. The first one to land back on the island wins. Agreed?”
“Yeah chapa, let’s do this” he said eagerly.
“Kurt, can you pop over there if we need you?” I asked turning to him
“Definitely my friend” he said giving me a thumbs up.
“Okay, you be the judge and the referee, okay?” I asked.
“Gladly” he said as he positioned himself just right to watch us.
“Jubilee” I said with a nod to her.
“On your mark,” she said while Roberto got up into the air next to me. “Get set” she said, and we both pointed ourselves out over the water, “Go!” she shouted and off we went.
I could feel Tag in the back of my mind like I had when I was here before, except this time knowing what it was (or who it was) made the experience a lot more relaxing.
Roberto and I flew over the water, the water rippling and shining underneath us as we aimed for the mainland. Roberto showed off a bit by doing some barrel rolls around me, and I showed off myself by flipping over so I was flying with my back to the water and my face up to the sky.
The two of us flew and swerved around each other, just laughing and messing around until we caught sight of the mainland.
“See you at the finish line” I shouted as I blazed a path towards the lighthouse.
“In your dreams old man” he said as we both rounded the lighthouse at the same time.
“Who you calling old?” I said as I blast the water below him and watched as some of the water splashed him in the face, causing him to stop.
I stopped and laughed at the sight, and I could feel Tag laughing inside too.
“Oh, so it’s like that is it” Roberto said as he blast the water under me, but I went flying off before it could hit me.
That was what we did the rest of the way back, the both of us shooting at the water trying to hit the other and laughing our heads off the rest of the way back. Swerving and looping and maneuvering around each other as we moved closer and closer to our target.
I looked up to the island and found the spot I wanted to land. I shot forward, moving as fast… or as fast as Roberto’s body… could go. I could just barely make Roberto out of the corner of my eye as we got within a mile of the island.
Roberto flew past me, but he didn’t land…
I took the opportunity to change back into my base form, which was bouncier and a little more pliable, and landed down on the edge.
“I won!” he shouted as he did flips in the air.
“Actually, I won” I called out to him.
“I got here first” he said in protest as he finally landed in front of me, powering down as he did.
“But we agreed whoever landed first would be the winner” I said with a sly smile.
“He’s right” Kurt said as he popped over to stand next to us. “You both agreed whoever landed first would win the race” he said, looking disappointed at Roberto’s stricken face.
“Shall we call it a tie” I offered, feeling sorry for him.
“Alright, but I want a rematch” he said with a playful gleam in his fiery eyes.
“Any time, any place chapa” I said just about ready to go again.
“Kevin!”
We all turned to see the Professor up on the sidewalk up the hill and Hank rushing towards us.
“Kevin, are you mentally connected to Morph?” I heard the Professor ask through Kevin’s head.
Boy, those party lines on the phones had nothing on this sensation right now…
“Yes” he said nervously, the Professor’s tone sounding intense in his head.
“Break the connection. Now!” he said and the both of us got so scared from his reaction that he popped out of my head immediately.
“Are you all right Morph?” Hank asked once he reached us.
“Yeah, I’m fine. What’s going on?” I asked confused.
“I think young Kevin and you had better come with me and the Professor; there’s something we need to show you” he said as he beckoned us to follow him.
Tag and I looked at each other in confusion, but did as he said and followed after him, leaving the others standing around looking at us with confusion themselves.
<><><><><>
We followed Hank and the Professor to the computer archives, and they sat us down in front of one of the screens.
“This might be a little difficult for the two of you to watch, but it’s very important” Hank said as he pushed some buttons at the controls. “I found this labeled K. MacTaggert and K. Sydney” he said before a video started playing on the screen.
At first it was nothing but an empty lab, then Moira came and sat down in front of the camera.
“Ma” Tag said looking at the screen like he wished she could come back to life…
“I… I don’t really know how to say this, so I’m just going to come out and say it” Moira said to the camera in a nervous voice. “I lied” she said.
There was a long pause before she finally started talking again.
“I told Kevin, Kevin Sydney, not my son Kevin” she clarified before going on. “I told him that I was putting him into a coma, so that I could try out a new medication on him, but I lied to him” she said.
I sat there dumbstruck as I felt the others turning to me.
I turned to the Professor, not entirely sure what it was I was feeling, but he motioned for me to stay put and calm down.
“I only told him that so that he would be more willing to be put into a coma” Moira said causing us all to turn back to her. “I need him sedated while I try and perform a new therapy on my son” she admitted. “I’ve been seeing some improvements in my experiments with the sonic therapy, and I think we’re ready to try it out on Kevin, on my son” she clarified. “I almost didn’t put Kevin in a coma, but I’ve been worried lately” she said, her brows creasing and her hands twitching as she went on. “I…I have no proof, no scientific evidence, not tests, nothing to prove this, but I’m worried that if my son were to posses Kevin Sydney… They could inadvertently form a permanent bond with each other.”
I turned to Tag, and he turned to me, the both of us looking confused.
“Kevin Sydney has a very unique body, capable of healing at extraordinary rates, and he’s capable of changing into any form he desires, with a nearly unlimited ability to mimic any power of any other mutant. My son has possessed people before, but he wears out the host like a short-lived battery. If Kevin were to ever possess Kevin Sydney, I worry that his ability to constantly regenerate, his ability to change appearances and powers, along with my son’s psychic abilities… I theorize that Kevin, my son, would become nearly unstoppable, and that because Kevin Sydney has a body that would never grow tired or weaken… As I said, I have no proof of any of this, it’s only a theory, but I’m worried that if this therapy doesn’t work on Kevin and he were to get loose and posses Kevin Sydney… I worry that I would lose my son in Kevin Sydney’s body, and I would lose them both in the prosses” she said, her lip quivering as she said it. “I put Kevin Sydney in a medical induced coma in order to protect him” she said after she found her voice again. “With him in an unconscious state it will be impossible for Kevin to possess him should something go wrong. I… I wanted Kevin Sydney to be safe, and this was the only way I could think to protect him.”
I could feel tears trying to form in my eyes, but I blinked them away as best I could to keep watching the video.
“I feel terrible, a doctor shouldn’t lie to her patients” she went on. “But Kevin, my son is growing bigger and more powerful, and I have to run these tests to try and help him.” She paused for a long time looking thoughtful and hurt and determined all at once as tears started falling down her cheeks. “I hope I never have to explain to Kevin Sydney that I lied to him, and treated him without the proper informed consent… I may have to carry this terrible burden until the day I die” she said, those words stabbing at me and haunting me all at once… “But I need to take care of my son and my patient, and this was the only way I could think to do it… I’m probably wrong about all of this, and God help me if I am, but I’m only a human doing the best that I can for those in my care” she said as fresh new tears fell from her eyes and down to her hands. “If Kevin Sydney ever does find out the truth, I pray he’ll forgive me for what I’ve done” she said as she wiped her cheeks, and then she reached up and turned off the camera, the screen going blank in front of us.
I sat there shocked for the longest time until I felt someone’s hand resting on mine.
I looked down at the hand and then looked up to see the Professor looking at me worriedly.
“Are you okay?” he asked softly.
I nodded, even though I didn’t really feel all that great right now…
I didn’t blame Moira for doing what she did, she was trying to help her son, and she did what she did to protect me… But having someone treat me without telling me the truth, feeling that little bit of betrayal, no matter how small and understandable the betrayal may be… It still stirred up my PTSD… Had me thinking back to the experiments that Sinister performed on me. Never knowing if I would wake up or not, never knowing what he was doing or what it would do to my body or my mind the next day…
I didn’t blame her for what she did, but the memories it dredged up were trying to throw me into a panic.
“Are you sure?” the Professor asked again.
I nodded again even though I felt the tears going down my cheeks and felt my shoulders shaking.
“Breathe Morph” Hank said as he came forward and took a hold of my hand from the Professor and placed his fingers on my wrist to check my pulse. “Breathe in for four” he said as he breathed in, counting to four for me. “And out for six” he said next as he breathed out and counted for me again.
Hank and I continued like that as the Professor moved over to sit next to Tag.
“Kevin, I think it would be best if you never tried to go into Morph’s mind again” he said in a stern but gentle tone.
“Okay Professor” he said with a nod. “Believe me I would never have gone in too deep or stayed in there that long, not with that thing crawling around in there” he said with a shiver.
“What thing?” the Professor asked surprised.
“Well, when I went in there the other day, there was this thing in there, evil and pitch black, it felt like, well, it felt like if Morph wasn’t there to help me the thing would have swallowed me alive” he said wrapping his arms around himself.
“You didn’t tell me about this” he said to Kevin before looking up to me.
“I thought it was my PTSD” I said looking between the Professor and Hank, taking in their worried looks. “What else would it be?” I asked nervously.
“May I have a look in your mind for a moment?” the Professor asked as he came to sit in front of me.
“Sure” I said.
I didn’t expect much of anything, the Professor had been in my mind a lot of times…
But when he went in things got really bad really fast.
We were outside of the mansion near one of the trees that the Professor loved the most – a lot of students had come to play in this tree and sit under the shade and read, and it faced his office so he could watch the students as they played like normal kids should.
“I remember when you first came to me” he said as he stood under the tree, looking at the sun shining through the leaves.
My heart sank at that thought and he could feel it.
“You are sad that you came to us?” he asked, and I immediately shook my head.
“No, it’s just… I came here when I was 14” I said with a sad sigh. “As of two years ago I had officially been with you longer than my dad” I said as I went to sit under the tree.
“I see” he said in that understanding tone that reassured you that he did understand.
He looked like he was about to say something, but a large crash of thunder and lightning up in the sky caused us both to look up.
Two red eyes appeared in the sky and a terrible laugh filled the air.
Suddenly the tree behind us came to life and grabbed the both of us. The trees leaves and branches turning black and wrapping around us clear up to our necks.
The Professor looked up to the sky and I could see golden waves coming from his mind.
I transformed myself into Iceman again and froze myself into a block of eyes, feeling the black tendrils go limp around me.
I broke out of the ice and fell to the ground.
I looked up and saw the black vines lifting the Professor up towards the sky, closer and closer to Sinister’s eyes.
“Xavier” the wind seemed to say as it blew around us, a cackle of triumph coming from the eyes above us.
I used my freezing powers to blast at where the tree stood, from the roots all the way up to the Professor. The black vines shattered into pieces, and I quickly shifted into Archangel and flew up to catch him. An angry yell crashed like thunder all around us as everything began to shake.
“Professor, you have to get out!” I yelled over all the noise.
“Morph” he called out and held on to me as if he didn’t want to let me go.
“Go!” I called out as I threw him up in the air and away from Sinister’s eyes…
The next thing I knew we were back in the archive room, the Professor had fallen to the floor, his chair tipped over as Tag tried to help him up. I about fell out of my chair, but Hank caught me and the chair and kept me up off the floor.
“What’s going on in here?” I heard Rogue say as she came flying in.
“Charles” I heard Erik say as he went over to set his chair back to rights while Rogue carefully put him back in his chair.
“What happened?” Ororo asked as she came over to stand between us.
“A fail safe” the Professor said as he rubbed his head. “I was so focused taking out his device I didn’t think to go in and look for anything else” he said as he banged the arm of his chair.
“Professor, what are you talkin’ about?” Rogue asked for all of them.
“Sinister put something in Morph’s mind, some sort of telepathic trap” he explained. “Any telepath who goes into their mind gets trapped by Sinister and stuck there, possibly indefinitely” he said through gritted teeth.
“But it didn’t trap me in there, not for long” Tag said looking between us confused.
“You weren’t the one he wanted” I said gasping for air.
“No, clearly it was a trap set for me” the Professor said with a guilty quiver to his shoulders.
“Was not tricking us into going to the artic trap enough?” Erik asked.
“This must have been a backup plan; in case we escaped before he caught us” the Professor said and then turned to Hank. “Prep the infirmary” he ordered. “I have to go in and get that thing out of them.”
“Professor, you’re in no condition to operate like this” Rogue said kneeling next to him.
“Morph does not look to good either” Kurt said causing everyone to look at me.
“My father will be here within the hour” Tag said next.
“I don’t think your dad is our biggest priority right now” Jubilee said to him.
“Na, ya don’t understand, ever since the attack on Genosh he’s been speaking out in favor of the mutants. The Friends of Humanity have been watching him, following him, they even tried to kidnap my little brother and sister” he explained. “I can handle them if it’s just me and my father, but you can’t have a fight on your hands if you want to work on Morph’s mind” he added looking at everyone worriedly.
“Professor” I said in a weak voice. “I want to go home.”
“But…” he tried to protest, but I cut him off.
“Please Professor, I want to go home” I said begging now.
I didn’t say it out loud because I didn’t want to frighten everyone, but if I was going to die, I wanted to die at home.
‘You will not die my child’ I heard the Professor say in my mind, and I was desperate to believe him.
“Perhaps it would be best to go back to the mansion first Charles” Hank said next to me. “And if this problem is as bad as you say, it might be prudent to arrange for a second opinion.”
“Is your fur on too tight?” Rogue asked, causing me to chuckle… weakly… “Who are we going to get to look over a mutant with a telepathic trap in their head?” she asked.
“Doctor Strange,” the Professor said in answer.
“Precisely” Hank said with a nod.
“Do we still have his contact information?” the Professor asked, causing Hank to hum as he thought that over.
“I should have it in a file or somewhere offsite if the files were damaged in the attack" he said.
“Very well” the Professor said grudgingly. “We will go back to the mansion, call Dr. Strange and I want to do it as fast as possible” he said firmly.
“We will prepare the jets” Erik said as he laid a hand on Rogue’s shoulder.
The two of them rushed out, and then Hank spoke up.
“I will contact the others and have them ready the infirmary” he said as he went over to one of the computers.
“Kurt, would you please teleport Morph to one of the jets” the Professor asked.
“Oh, come on Professor, I can walk” I said in protest. “Besides, I have to go and pack up my stuff.”
“I will retrieve your things, you do as the Professor says” Ororo said over me.
“This is ridiculous, it’s only a few things and a short walk I am perfectly…”
I stopped talking after I saw Ororo’s eyes glowing and heard a crack of thunder outside that shook the entire building, causing me to grip the chair I was sitting in.
“I will retrieve your things, you do as the Professor says” she said again, in a tone that dared me to say otherwise.
“Yes ma’am” I said in a small voice.
She smiled happily and went out to take care of my things.
“Good choice” Kurt said as he popped me out of the building and into the jet.
“I will pray for you my friend” he said as he set me down in one of the seats. “Heaven will aid us” he said in such a sure tone.
“When it comes to Sinister Heaven’s got nothing to do with it” I said.
Kurt placed his hand on top of mine and stayed with me until the others came to fly us home.