Overload
The compound was unusually busy that afternoon.
Arthur had been doing fine at first—bouncing between tasks, helping out with a few technical issues in the lab, even grabbing lunch with Steve and Sam. But it didn’t take long for the usual noise of the compound to start creeping in, pulling at his focus like a thousand threads. His mind, which had been calm earlier in the day, began to fray, slowly unraveling as the sounds around him layered together like a growing storm.
It started small. The hum of the fridge. The rapid clicks of Natasha typing away on her tablet. The sharp clang of metal on metal from the training room, where Bucky and Sam were sparring. The TV blaring in the common area. And then, the whispers. Not actual whispers, but the sense of people talking, of people moving, their presence just enough to push Arthur’s senses to the edge.
It was like a constant stream of noise—voices, footsteps, the occasional beeping of a computer. And the more he tried to focus, the more they seemed to pile on top of each other.
I need to get out. I need to get out.
He stood up quickly, his chair scraping loudly against the floor as his body moved before his mind could catch up. He felt the sharp sting of panic in his chest, his breathing becoming shallow as he tried to ignore the rising sense of being overwhelmed. His hands were shaking, and the back of his neck tingled as he noticed the sharp angles of the room—too many corners, too many things, too much noise.
“Arti?” Steve’s voice cut through his thoughts, calm and steady, but it felt like it was coming from far away.
Arthur couldn’t focus on Steve. He couldn’t focus on anything. The walls felt like they were closing in, the room shrinking around him as his senses overloaded. Every sound, every movement, felt like it was vibrating inside his skull.
Without thinking, he started walking—no, pacing—toward the hallway. His eyes darted around the compound, but it all felt too much. Too bright. Too loud.
“Arti, hey!” Steve’s voice was closer now, but Arthur barely registered it. He could feel Steve’s hand on his arm, and the touch was enough to break him out of the trance for a split second. But the overwhelming sense of anxiety was too strong.
“I—” Arthur started, but his words got stuck in his throat. His breath was ragged, like he was drowning in the noise, the chaos of everything happening at once. “I... I can’t. I just—”
“Okay, okay,” Steve said, his tone gentle but firm. “Let’s just step outside, alright? We’ll get some air.”
Arthur didn’t resist as Steve led him through the hall. The further they moved from the center of the action, the clearer his thoughts began to feel, but not by much. His mind was still buzzing, still swirling with thoughts that refused to settle. The air felt colder as they stepped into the hallway, and the quiet was a welcome relief—until Arthur’s body realized it wasn’t enough.
His head was still spinning.
Arthur found himself leaning against the wall, his arms wrapped tightly around his chest like he was holding himself together. Steve stayed by his side, his presence a silent comfort, but Arthur couldn’t shake the anxiety that was wrapping itself around his ribs like a vice.
“I can’t...” Arthur murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. His leg bounced erratically, and he could feel his heart thudding in his chest. It was like his mind was moving faster than his body, and his body couldn’t keep up.
“Arti?” Steve’s voice was soft, but he didn’t sound afraid or frustrated. There was just understanding. He crouched down in front of Arthur, placing a hand on his knee to still the restless bouncing. “Look at me, alright?”
Arthur’s eyes met Steve’s, his gaze unfocused at first, as if the world around him was too blurry to process. Slowly, Steve guided Arthur’s focus to his face, the familiar warmth in his eyes grounding Arthur, even if it was just for a second.
“Breathe with me,” Steve said softly, his tone calm. “In for four... hold for four... then out for four. Come on, just like that. I’m right here.”
Arthur didn’t respond right away. He just felt overwhelmed, like everything in the world was spinning too fast for him to catch up. But Steve’s voice kept him tethered, steady. Arthur nodded shakily, trying to match his breath to the rhythm Steve was setting.
“In for four... hold... out for four,” Steve repeated, his voice smooth and patient. “There you go, Arti. Just like that.”
Arthur’s breathing was ragged at first, but slowly, the tightness in his chest began to loosen. Each breath was shaky, but Steve didn’t let up, staying close and offering that quiet reassurance that Arthur was okay, even when his world felt anything but.
“That’s it,” Steve murmured, gently guiding Arthur through the breathing. “In... hold... out. One more time, okay?”
Arthur’s leg stopped bouncing. Slowly, his hands stopped trembling. He didn’t realize how tightly he had been gripping his chest until his muscles started to relax. His head was still spinning, but it wasn’t as loud anymore. The room didn’t feel like it was closing in on him quite as much.
“You’re doing great, Arti,” Steve continued, keeping his voice steady. “You don’t have to do this alone. We’ve got you.”
Arthur squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, just trying to hold himself together. He was still rattled, still anxious, but the way Steve stayed by his side, breathing with him, made him feel less alone in the chaos. It was like the noise had softened, just a little, and in that moment, that little bit of relief felt like a lifeline.
“I... I’m sorry,” Arthur whispered, his voice small. “I didn’t mean to... I didn’t mean to fall apart.”
Steve smiled softly, giving Arthur’s knee a reassuring squeeze. “Arti, there’s nothing to apologize for. You’re not falling apart. You’re just human. And we’re all allowed to have moments where we need a little help.”
Arthur shook his head slightly, feeling the familiar pang of shame. He hated the vulnerability, hated feeling out of control. But Steve’s words were like a balm, soothing the rawness in his chest.
“You’re not alone in this,” Steve said, his voice firm but gentle. “We all have our moments. You don’t have to hide them from me, okay?”
Arthur took a shaky breath, looking up at Steve. The tension in his chest hadn’t disappeared, but it felt more manageable now. The world didn’t feel so overwhelming, and the storm in his mind had quieted just enough for him to breathe through it.
“Thanks, Steve,” Arthur said softly, his voice still unsteady but sincere. “I... really needed that.”
Steve gave him a small, understanding smile. “Anytime, Arti. Anytime.”
For once, Arthur didn’t feel so overwhelmed by the weight of his thoughts. The noise and the chaos would still be there, but with Steve by his side, maybe it wouldn’t feel as unbearable. Maybe it was okay to let the storm rage for a little while, as long as he had someone to help him weather it.
To be continued…