Beneath the Sun
The days after the panic attack had been tough for Arthur. He’d spent most of his time in the compound either avoiding people or keeping to himself. It wasn’t that he wanted to be alone—it was just easier. His mind was a storm of emotions, and he wasn’t sure how to handle the calm that followed. It felt like a trap, a quiet before something else would hit.
The walls of the compound felt too close, and even though Bucky made sure to check on him, Arthur couldn’t shake the feeling of being lost. He was stuck in a dark corner of his own mind, and no amount of reassurance seemed to break through. There was still so much uncertainty. Still so much fear.
Arthur found himself pacing through the halls late that evening, his thoughts a constant hum in the background. He was tired—exhausted, really—but he couldn’t bring himself to sleep. There was too much swirling in his head, too much that hadn’t been dealt with yet. The panic attack had shaken him in ways he wasn’t prepared for, and now, every step felt like a reminder of just how broken he still was.
It wasn’t until he reached the common area that he realized how late it had gotten. The usual energy of the room was gone, replaced with the soft murmur of distant voices and the faint buzz of overhead lights. Arthur stood in the doorway, his hand resting lightly on the frame, unsure of whether he should even go in.
“Hey,” a voice suddenly called out. It was young, energetic—a complete contrast to the weight on Arthur’s chest. “You’re Arthur, right?”
Arthur blinked, looking over to see a kid standing by the kitchen counter. He had messy brown hair, a wide, awkward grin, and the kind of energy that Arthur hadn’t felt in... well, a long time.
“Yeah,” Arthur answered slowly, his voice rough. “That’s me.”
The kid—Peter, if he remembered correctly—stepped closer, still grinning like he hadn’t a care in the world. “I’m Peter. You, uh, mind if I join you? I promise I won’t bite. Much.”
Arthur stared at him for a moment, unsure of how to respond. He wasn’t exactly in the mood for small talk, but there was something about Peter—something bright, something hopeful—that pulled at him. Maybe it was the fact that Peter didn’t seem to notice the storm cloud of tension hanging over him, or maybe it was the way the kid had a way of making everything seem a little less... heavy.
“Sure,” Arthur said, his voice quieter now. “I guess.”
Peter smiled, his eyes wide with curiosity as he stepped forward. “So, what’s your deal? I mean, I’ve heard a lot about you. The whole ‘big guy with the mysterious past’ thing.”
Arthur raised an eyebrow, surprised by Peter’s bluntness. He didn’t know whether to laugh or cringe. “Something like that,” he muttered, rubbing the back of his neck.
“Yeah, well,” Peter continued, as if it was the most normal thing in the world, “everyone here’s got a little bit of mystery to them. Me? I’m just trying to keep the place from falling apart.” He gestured vaguely at the kitchen, where he’d clearly been fiddling with something.
Arthur couldn’t help the small chuckle that escaped him. Peter’s energy was contagious, even if he didn’t know it. It was like a light in the middle of all the darkness Arthur had been sinking into. Something about the kid’s carefree attitude, his lack of hesitation, made Arthur feel... seen.
“I’m sure that’s a full-time job,” Arthur said, trying to keep his tone light, even though the weight on his chest hadn’t lessened. His hands were still jittery from the anxiety, but he could feel the edges of his dark thoughts begin to ease ever so slightly.
Peter gave him an exaggerated look of concern. “Oh, you have no idea. You wouldn’t believe some of the stuff that happens here.”
Arthur raised an eyebrow. “Like what?”
Peter leaned in, dropping his voice in mock seriousness. “Like the time I accidentally webbed Tony’s shoes to the floor. He was so mad.”
Arthur’s laugh was genuine this time, a small spark of amusement cutting through the fog. “That sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.”
“Yeah, well, Tony’s a walking disaster sometimes,” Peter said with a grin. “But it’s okay. We’ve all had our moments, right?”
Arthur paused at that, his eyes flickering briefly to the floor. He didn’t feel like he had ever had a moment, not like Peter. He hadn’t had any carefree days, no memories of laughter or lightheartedness. His past had been too dark for that. But maybe, just maybe, there could be room for something new. Something better.
“You’ve been here long?” Arthur asked, his voice quieter now.
Peter, still grinning, shrugged. “A while. Not that long though. I joined up when... well, things got real.” His smile faltered just a bit, but only for a second, before he was back to his usual, goofy self. “But enough about me. You look like you’ve got a lot on your mind. You good?”
Arthur hesitated, his thoughts a chaotic mess behind his eyes. Peter’s question was simple, but somehow, it felt like the first time anyone had really asked. The weight in his chest felt a little heavier, but there was also something in the way Peter was looking at him—something kind and patient, like he wasn’t expecting anything but the truth.
“I don’t know,” Arthur said finally, looking away. “It’s... hard sometimes. I don’t know how to get out of my own head.”
Peter nodded like he understood. “Yeah. I get that.” He stood up straight, then stretched his arms above his head. “But you know what? Sometimes, it helps to just... do something stupid. You know, let loose.”
Arthur glanced at him, eyebrows raised. “Stupid?”
Peter grinned. “Yeah! Like, um... you ever tried jumping off a roof into a pool?”
Arthur blinked, unsure whether to laugh or be concerned. “That’s... definitely stupid.”
Peter’s grin widened. “Exactly! You see, the thing is, sometimes you just need to take that leap. You can’t control everything, and sometimes, you gotta make mistakes in order to see things differently. Life’s too short to be serious all the time, you know?”
Arthur chuckled, a real laugh this time. “I think you might be onto something.”
Peter’s eyes twinkled. “I know I am.”
For the first time in what felt like forever, Arthur felt a sense of relief. The darkness that had consumed him for days didn’t vanish completely, but the flicker of light Peter brought into the room was enough to make him believe that there might be a way out of it.
Maybe there was more to life than the heaviness of his past. Maybe, just maybe, there was room for hope again.
“Well, thanks, kid,” Arthur said, his tone a little lighter now. “I think I needed that.”
Peter gave him a playful salute. “Anytime, big guy. Anytime.”
As Arthur watched Peter leave, a small smile tugged at his lips. For the first time in a long time, Arthur felt like maybe—just maybe—he wasn’t as lost as he thought.
To be continued...