Catch Up
After all his griping, Logan just ended up ordering a pizza. Scott was left to wonder whether this universe's Scott actually liked olives, or if Logan had asked for them to spite him after all. He picked them off while Logan wasn't looking regardless.
They threw a cooking competition on the TV to watch while they ate on the couch. Scott would come to view this as a mistake after the first few times Logan would randomly start shouting at the contestants without warning like it was a sports game, making Scott jump out of his skin each time. It didn't help that he was pressed up against him at the corner of the couch, Logan sitting with legs spread and one arm slung over Scott’s shoulders.
When the sun started setting, the grizzled old mutant excused himself to go herd the chickens back in the coop and let the dogs out, leaving Scott to clean up after them and wash their dishes in the sink. He was grateful for another few moments to himself to collect his thoughts.
Eventually the back door opened and the sound of claws skittering on the floor preceded heavy footfall. Age had slowed Logan down just a bit, it seemed. He removed his flannel stiffly and took his time throwing it on the table, pulling out a chair, and easing himself down. He said nothing as he waited for Scott, merely watching passively. He didn't say out loud that he was expecting Scott to explain himself, and didn't need to.
Scott looked out at the sky turning to dusk. The X-Men still weren't here, and he promised himself he'd spill the beans to Logan if they hadn't. He poured them both a glass of water before sitting down; he was probably going to be doing a lot of talking, and he knew Logan liked having something to do with hands during serious conversations. The old man's eyes stayed trained on Scott as he joined him at the table with a deep sigh at the conversation ahead.
“So.” Scott opened.
“So.” Logan repeated curtly. His hands were already wrapped around the glass Scott sat in front of him. He'd had plenty of time to figure out how to start this, but now he felt at a loss of what to say. He looked down at his glass of water while he tried to remember exactly how he figured he should go about this, the half a speech he had planned out escaping him at the moment.
Logan's hand came into view and grasped one of his with a reassuring tug, and Scott felt guilty all over again. Scott was important to Logan in this world; he wasn't ready to let him down yet. When Scott looked up, it was just those eyes again. Fierce and focused.
“I'm aware how this is going to sound,” he started slowly, “but I'm being completely serious. I'm not… I'm not ‘your’ Scott. I'm from another universe.” Scott had not planned to just jump right in like that, but… it was Logan. He'd never appreciated beating around the bush, so Scott had to grant him that in the end.
The older man furrowed his brow and narrowed his eyes, but he didn't interrupt. Scott tried to get himself back on script, recalling the other times he'd tried to explain with the rest of the team present. It was easier than trying to do it with Gambit kneeling in front of a guillotine, at least.
“The X-Men have been trying to capture a mutant that can go from one universe to another- basically, different versions of reality where things are slightly different from each other-”
“I know what alternate universes are.” He interrupted sternly.
“Oh, good. That makes this way easier.” He flooded with relief. “That's why I came here, to stop this mutant.”
"The only way to get here was by borrowing my body from this universe. The Scott you know is completely okay- as soon as I'm gone, he'll be back.” Scott said quickly, nervous. This was way easier with a group of people to back him up. Logan was staring at him unreadably, expression unchanging. “I know this is difficult to believe, but the other X-Men will be here soon, either tonight or tomorrow. If you just wait until then, I promise-”
“I believe you.”
“-that they can- oh. You do?”
Logan's had relaxed a little, but he was still staring right into him. Scott couldn't help feeling like somehow he was the more surprised of the two of them right now.
Logan pulled his hands back and reclined in his chair. “This isn’t really your sense of humor.”
Scott blinked. “Okay, just to be clear: you believe me as in, you think what I'm saying is true? Or is this a ‘I believe that you believe it’ situation?” He'd been there once in another reality and was not looking to revisit.
“Scotty, I've known you long enough to see what your mental breakdowns look like. This isn't that.” He was being very matter-of-fact about the whole thing. “Unless you're finally going senile.”
“I promise I'm completely mentally present right now.” Scott said with as much sincerity as he could.
“I know. I believe you. I mean it.” Logan’s demeanor had eased considerably, but his face had only grown more serious.
Scott finally breathed, feeling more grateful towards Logan than he had in a long time. “Have the X-Men here dealt with something like this before?”
Logan tipped his head back and forth in a “kinda” motion. “How much do you know about the Mutant Conversion, little over a decade ago now?”
“I just got here this morning, so I read a few news articles about it, but I don't know much.”
“Most of what happened was never made public, but the X-Men were there.” They were getting straight into it. Logan really did just… believe him. He was kind of touched, if a little concerned for the lack of skepticism. “It was a mutant back then, too.”
Scott sat up straight. “Seriously? Just one?”
He nodded. “This is a secret, by the way, so keep it to yourself. Her name was Jessica. She was young, strong and too inexperienced to know what she was doing. I think she was 11 or 12.”
Logan readjusted himself to delve into the story. “She'd only recently found out she was a mutant. She had reality-bending powers, the ability to shift just little pieces at a time. At first, anyway. Then she started learning about the way mutants are treated first-hand, in the usual way. Humans were scared of her, all her friends rejected her, doctors and teachers refused to help her. She finally ran away and came to us… actually, she lived in Berlin, she snuck onto a plane. She just… changed the world to one where no one could see her, then changed it back.”
“Couldn't she just change reality to one where minors fly alone, or something?”
He scratched his beard. “I guess I don't know the ins and outs of it. We didn't have the chance to figure it out. But based on what happened, I don't think she could change anyone's minds about anything, or make them forget what happened. I think. Doesn't matter now, either way.”
“So, what happened?”
“She called her parents to let them know where she was and that she was okay. I don't know what all they said on the other side of the phone, but I know they didn't take her being a mutant well. Could hear them yelling at her.”
Not an uncommon reaction, unfortunately, and a fairly normal trigger for uncontrolled release of powers in young mutants who have just discovered their gifts. Scott shook his head slightly and Logan responded with a shrug and a pause to drink water. One would think that at a certain point, parents would learn to hold their tongues if they disapprove when their child comes out as a mutant, for their own protection if nothing else.
“Jessica reacted without thinking. She said she wished mutants didn't exist, so no one would have to be treated like this again. And what do you know, that's exactly what happened.”
There was a moment of silence while Scott digested the information.
“But it affected everyone with powers? Not just mutants?”
“I don't think she knew the difference.”
“And I'm guessing this was kept secret to protect her?” He asked Logan, who was now resting his chin on his hand and looking away, a somber expression on his face.
“Yeah. Didn't want anyone trying to get revenge.” He stared at his glass as he fiddled with it. “Didn't take her long to regret it, but she'd taken the power to fix it away from herself and anyone else who would have been able to. She didn't know what she was doing. She was just a kid.”
They both fell quiet again. He couldn't imagine just going back to a normal life after that, for himself or for the girl, after what she'd done. Had they tried to undo it? Would Scott want to? He could easily imagine the X-Men being split on the topic; for many mutants, the world that had been created is one they'd always dreamed of. One where they couldn't hurt people because of their mutant gifts, and couldn't be hurt because of them.
Scott looked over at Logan, who was staring at the bottom of his tilted glass like there was something mildly interesting there. He considered asking the former mutant how he'd felt about it, then thought better. He had no idea if it was still a sore subject, but the years of scars across his entire body told Scott enough about how well he took it.
“What happened to the school?” Scott finally asked. Logan casually looked up at him without moving.
“Stayed mostly the same for a couple years.” The words came out mumbling because of how his face was still smushed against his hand. “Lotta kids didn't have a home to go back to anymore, and plenty of ‘em needed help transitioning to human life. I think it helped... Sticking together. Not everyone stayed, though. I was even more in and out than usual.”
“Is it closed now?”
He lifted his head up and shook it, causing Scott to lift his eyebrows in surprise. “Seemed like a waste of facilities. Now it's a school for the gifted in the conventional sense. Hank still teaches there, actually. Furball couldn't part with his lab.”
Scott snorted, then caught Logan's words. “‘Furball'? He didn't go back to looking human?”
“He did. He hates that I call him that.”
Scott started laughing at that and then tried to hide it by smoothing a hand over his mouth. A smile spread across Logan's face at this, wrinkles crinkling around his eyes. It was genuine and comfortable, the way he was looking at Scott with a sparkle in his eye, like he did it all the time. Scott's Logan would always look away if he caught him doing something like that, but this one made no effort to hide it. Scott had to force himself to snap out of it when he realized he was smiling too. This didn't do anything to stop the grin from growing on Logan.
Scott's eyes drifted down to the ring on Logan's dog tags, then to the ring on his own hand. He'd been forcing the matter out of his mind in the strongest act of denial he had ever managed. When he looked back up at Logan’s face, his smile was fading.
“You said Scott's okay. My Scott.” He said firmly, but still light enough to let him know he hadn't stopped believing Scott's story. The question was implied; if you aren't him, where is he?
“He's… more or less asleep? My consciousness is sharing his body. That's how Jean explained it, anyway. Don't worry, I don't intend to do anything to put him at risk while I'm here.”
Logan’s jaw worked while he chewed on the inside of his lip, processing his words.
“...Jean.”
He didn't need to say more than that. It was sad. Mournful. Longing.
“She's… gone, here?” Scott asked gently.
The version of him that felt indignant at the very notion of Logan missing Jean was long gone. Logan, at least in his world, had accepted his love for Jean and chosen to move forward as their friend so they could function as team, no longer expecting any meaningful reciprocation of his romantic feelings. Scott felt like it was only right of him to do the same. He used to believe that his feelings for her couldn't possibly be that profound anyway, given that he'd known her for such a short time compared to Scott, but that had changed after getting to know him.
Logan loved people quickly, deeply, and entirely. Scott had gone from looking down on him for it to seeing it as one of his best qualities.
The Logan across from him swallowed and looked away.
“Was it before or after the whole ‘conversion’ thing?” Scott asked.
“Before.”
So it was over a decade ago. Over a decade, and Logan still wasn't really over it.
“Y’know, we…” Logan started, his voice lightening in tone yet somehow becoming more bitter. “We, uh… well, we’d lost people before. You know how it is with the X-Men. Sometimes people die, and that's it. Sometimes they die and come back. And you never know, so always have to assume they won't, or you go crazy.”
Scott nodded.
“We kind of… I mean, we missed her. We mourned her. But we all kinda thought, in the back of our heads, that she'd make it back to us somehow.”
His eyes were becoming distant as he reminisced. “That was just another thing we had to deal with, after we lost our mutations and everything became ‘normal’. There was no more coming back. Everyone we lost and secretly hoped would come back, that was it. No more second chances.”
His voice had grown quiet near the end, and when it was clear he had nothing else to say Scott let the silence sit between them for a minute or so before he had to drop the news.
“She'll be here with everyone else.”
Logan looked back at him, eyes dark. He said nothing.
“If it's too hard, I can tell her to hang back. Give you space.”
He paused, pursed his lips, then shook his head. “No. No, it's been a long time, time enough to come to terms with it. If I didn't at least say hi, I'd never forgive myself.”
“Okay. If you're sure.”
As Logan once more lost himself in thought, Scott’s eyes traveled back to the ring on his hands, then to Logan’s, then to his. If Jean was dead, then there was no chance…
“Hey, Logan?”
Logan inhaled and shifted in his seat, resetting himself. “Hm?”
Scott suddenly felt shy.
“Spit it out.”
“... Are we… married? ”
Logan stared at him in absolute dumbfounded silence. He blinked. Blinked again. Then the full-throated, barking laughter spilled out of him.
“What do you- what-?” He wheezed, doing the old man mid-laugh cough to catch his breath. “Are you fucking with me? What are you…?” He cut himself off with laughter again.
“Okay, look -” Scott said defensively. “It’s not like- it's not like I'm just figuring it out.”
“Oh, really?” he said sarcastically, face red. Scott didn't think he'd ever seen him laugh this hard.
“I didn't want to make assumptions! You wouldn't know this, but when you've been to as many alternate universes as I have-” he scrambled to justify himself.
His eyebrows shot up “Oh , o-kay.” The sarcasm was absolutely dripping off him.
Scott’s hand instinctively went up to his visor in a wordless threat to blast him if he didn't shut up, but of course there was no visor there. He compensated by kicking Logan's shin under the table, which just made his face scrunch up tighter in laughter. He slapped the table while he lost it and tried to catch his breath. Scott leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms while he waited for him to get over himself.
Finally, he stopped and took a drink of water to recompose himself. He looked back up at Scott with teary eyes.
“Thanks, I needed that.”
“Glad I could help.”
“You always do, Slim.”
Scott fought the urge to straight up punch him.
“What did- What did you think was going on? Askin’ seriously.” He said the last part quickly before Scott could get mad again.
Scott rolled his eyes and scoffed indignantly. “Anything else! Maybe I was just staying with you. I don't know. I was trying as hard as I possibly could to find another explanation.” Logan pursed his lips in a way that told him he was pointedly not saying anything. Just going to let him sit in it. Scott sat back up, irate.
“Listen to me. In all the nonsense in all the weird, off-brand, and frankly stupid universes I've been to, we've never been married. If you asked me to make a list of every X-Man, everyone who's ever been related to the X-Men in any way, of any gender, in order of who I'd be most likely to MARRY, you wouldn't even make the list because I'd forget to add you, because putting you in the same dimension as marriage is too ridiculous to even consider in the first place.”
“Okay.” Logan said flatly, unimpressed.
Scott just stared him down. He was completely aware he was being dramatic and making no sense, but mostly was grateful the others weren't there to see all that, because god he was stressed out and tired and didn't need that right now.
“... So.” Logan said like he was continuing a normal conversation and nothing had happened. “I take it we aren't that uh, committed. In your universe.”
Scott deflated like a pool toy being stored away for the fall. “No. We aren't together. At all. I think you would gut me if I ever suggested anything like it.”
“Huh.” he sounded mildly amused and even less surprised. “Well, you have time.”
Scott furrowed his brow in disbelief. “I'm with Jean.”
Even though Scott desperately wanted Logan to respond to that point, he infuriatingly didn't. “So, earlier today.”
“Yes?” he sighed.
Logan looked at him with jovial curiosity. “Was that the first time you've kissed me?”
Scott's stomach dropped. He really, really hoped Logan had forgotten about that. He hesitated before answering.
“...Yes.”
“Hm.” He hummed in a ‘hey, whaddaya know?’ sort of tone, like it was only kind of interesting, and shrugged one shoulder.
Scott sighed for the 100th time that evening. “What.” He said sharply.
“Nothing.” he replied nonchalantly. “Just… wouldn't a’ guessed.”
Scott didn't know what to do with that information, so he didn't do anything. He threw it away and pretended he never heard it.
One of the two pointy-eared dogs, Thistle or… whatever the other one was called, came over and rested his chin on Logan's thigh for attention. He finally turned away from Scott to scratch his ears lovingly. Scott watched him and wondered if losing Jean or the X-Men in this universe had made this Scott lose his goddamn mind or something.
“When did you say your X-Men were coming?” Logan asked, not looking up.
“Tonight, or early tomorrow at the latest. It's never taken longer than that, at least.”
Logan checked his phone for the time. “It's getting late.”
Scott peered over. “It’s only ten?”
“We usually go to bed around now.”
“Really?”
“Well, one of us makes the other go to bed around this time. Whoever is less busy, usually me.”
“I should stay up and wait for the team. Besides, we really have more we should discuss-”
Logan turned back and threw him a look. “Sounds like they'll be here whether you're awake or not. This mutant you're looking for- you said they go to whoever has the strongest powers they can find, right?”
“Right.”
“Then they'll be lookin’ a while, because we ain't got anyone like that.”
It sounded like Logan had reached the same conclusion Scott had, but it didn't calm his nervous energy.
“Even so-” he began to argue.
“You work yourself to death in your universe too, Scotty? I’d would’ve hoped you figured out how to relax in some world or another by now.”
Scott bit his tongue at the callout.
“I don't want to have to repeat myself even more than I already will when your friends get here, anyway. I'm done talking for the night.” His words were sharp, but his demeanor was softening in a way that made Scott mad for reasons he didn't entirely understand. Probably because he wished his Logan could ever make a point so calmly (Not his Logan, his world’s - whatever.)
The old man got up from the table and patted Scott’s shoulder on the way to the sink to put his cup away.
“Okay, one more question. Just out of curiosity.” Scott called behind him. The dog, who had followed Logan with perked ears, seemed to realize he wouldn't be getting any more attention and came over to Scott. He gave him a few pets. “What do you and I do? For work, I mean.” He wanted to be considerate to whatever schedule of this world's Scott he was ruining.
“You're a math teacher. Summer school just ended, so you're on break.” Logan responded from the counter. “I do carpentry, but it's not a steady job. Just somethin’ to keep busy. We don't really need money anyway, Chuck left us more than enough.”
Scott chuckled. “Charles put us in his will, and we live in this tiny house.”
Logan shrugged as he walked back over, stopping with his hand on his hip. “Mansions were never my style. Turns out, if it's not for school, it isn't yours either. We give most of the inheritance away when we get the checks.”
Scott nodded in understanding. “Wait, don't tell me you got all those scars from woodworking?”
Logan laughed at his dumb joke. “Yeah, I'm just piss fucking poor at it. Can't trust me with a bandsaw to save my life.” he shifted his weight. “No, I uh… used to get up to a lot more than this. Healing might a’ gone away, but the trouble sure as hell didn't.”
“Nothing changes overnight, I suppose.” Scott said sympathetically.
Logan just smiled, shrugged, and walked away. Scott stood up to join him, and it seemed that while he was used to staying up much later, this body wasn't. Maybe it was the age, but bed sounded like heaven right now.
“So what does bedtime look like with 20 animals to look after?” he asked Logan, who was already headed off to the living room.
“It looks like me taking care of it while you get ready for bed.” he called back.
“I hope you aren't just being nice to me because I'm technically a guest.” he joked.
Logan sauntered over and placed his hand on Scott’s arm, rubbing it soothingly, like a partner would. Scott opened his mouth to say something about it, but before he could, Logan’s lips were on his again. Scott pulled away in shock, which just put a smirk on Logan's face.
“What are you-”
“That hasn't worked at shutting you up in years.” He said, a little too proud of himself.
“Alright, you know what-” he started, but Logan was already walking away again. Scott shook his head and headed back upstairs.
In their bedroom, he changed back into the pajamas from this morning. He was in too much of a hurry to get out of there before to get a good look at the place. There wasn't much to see anyway; the bedroom was comparatively plain and tidy, probably this Scott’s doing. There were a few more framed photos on the dresser, likely whatever didn't fit on the walls downstairs.
He picked up what must have been their wedding photo, front and center. They were younger, looking about the same as he and his Logan did, which made the whole thing a lot stranger. They were both in suits, Scott with his upright posture and "I'm-being-photographed” toothy grin, Logan looking significantly more casual and leaning on Scott, his smile smaller but more natural. Even on his wedding day, Logan’s hair was fighting against whatever product he had put in it to get it under control. Despite the surreal nature of it all, Scott couldn't help but get a kick out of it.
He replaced where it was and got ready for bed, brushing his teeth and refilling the water on the nightstand. When he climbed back under the blanket, he had to remind himself to take his glasses off and set them aside. He wondered how long it took him in this universe to get used to that, or to be able to wake up without panicking. Maybe he still did.
Logan ambled a little while later and paused when he saw Scott.
“Scotty?”
“Yeah, what's up?” he rolled over to face him, the movement making him realize his body was already drifting off to sleep.
Logan was looking at him with mild intrigue. “You know you don't have to sleep in here, right? We have a guest bedroom.”
He hoped his embarrassment didn't show, because he did forget that. “Sorry, I can go.”
“Hey, I don't care.” he said, clearly amused.
Truthfully, Scott was too tired to get back up or even particularly mind it. Maybe if he hadn't already fallen asleep with his head on Logan's chest earlier he'd be a bit more motivated, but that bridge was already crossed. Besides, he'd found himself adjusting to his new circumstances relatively quickly. Case in point, he barely batted an eyelash when Logan undressed to his boxers and slipped on loose pajama pants.
Scott got a glimpse of a particularly gruesome scar on his back, a deep slash from his shoulder blades down to his lower back, deep and red and jagged at the edges. It looked like it should have gotten stitches and didn't. It almost distracted from the characteristic dip in flesh of gunshot wounds around the kidney area. It made Scott… sadder than he expected. A little angry.
Then Logan turned, and peeking above the waistband on his hip was a series of straight white lines that Scott recognized instantly, because he'd seen the same on some of his students. They were cuts from self-harm, shallow and short, but there were easily more than 20 crammed on just the small patch of skin visible above his pants. It was clear there were many more out of sight that he was too distracted that morning to notice. It made him nauseous, but he didn't ask. They were clearly from a long time ago, and it wasn't his business to begin with. He decided to put it out of his mind.
Logan pulled the covers back and climbed in, giving Scott as much distance as he could, in stark contrast to that morning. Logan turned his head to look at him, probably because Scott had been staring at him again without meaning to. He looked properly worried for the first time since their conversation, and Scott wondered if maybe he'd been holding it in for his sake.
“Hey, Logan?” Scott asked.
He grunted in response.
“Thanks for believing me. I mean it, it makes everything a whole lot easier. I know it’s a lot to ask.” He said, trying to convey his appreciation as best he could.
Logan sat with that for a moment. “Thanks for telling me.”
Scott nodded and rolled onto his back. “I'll be honest, though. I'm not looking forward to trying to explain to everyone tomorrow why I'm here with you. I don't think I'll ever live it down.”
“What, are you ashamed of me?” Logan's voice teased from beside him.
“Sorry, but whatever happened in this universe- it's different for us. The idea of me and you is absurd in mine. The others are not going to let it go-”
“It's fine. Seriously.” Logan interrupted with a chuckle. “Nobody could believe it here, either. Hell, you and I didn't believe it. I think a few of ‘em were convinced it was some sort of deep cover all the way until the wedding day. Pretty sure Bobby still thinks it's an elaborate running joke.”
Scott snickered. “I can see that.”
His eyelids were feeling heavy and he had to blink hard to keep them open. He was already slipping off. The thought crossed his mind that he should probably say goodnight, but that would take too much energy.
“I'll wake you up when they get here, then.” Logan said. Scott made an affirmative sound, then drifted off to sleep.