"Why are you called gods anyway? You're just like the Captain, slightly better regular men," Natasha had posed the question shortly after their first capture of Loki, on the helicarrier. Thor had looked amused at her question but had made to wave them off when Tony had spoken up.
"I assumed it was the general fuzziness that makes them hard to look at." Tony had glanced up after the minute of silence to see confused looks shot his way and Thor, who was positively beaming.
"Fuzziness?" Steve asked when Tony's eyes glanced over him.
"Yeah, it's like a periphery thing, like they aren't the right shape, but I can look at them just fine straight on?" Bruce's nervous voice rang out, making Tony's head snap to his new science buddy.
"This is excellent, Man of Iron!" Thor's booming voice makes all of them jump, aside from perfect Natasha. "You are far above any Midgardian I've met! None other has struggled to accept our false forms as truth!"
"False forms?" Natasha asks, disbelief coloring her tone.
Thor nods, clasping his hand on Tony's shoulder in a manner that could be playful if Tony was less fragile. "Of course! My brother would be much better at explaining, but your tiny brains can not handle our true greatness, so they don't!" Thor smiles down at Tony, who returns it with a wince. "Except you. I will allow you to gaze upon my visage!"
Any and all visage gazing was cut off by alarms blaring and Loki's continued efforts to take over the world.
---
Tony stepped back into his penthouse, where SHIELD agents were swarming around cataloging the scene and the Avengers were scattered around giving statements. Thor stood off to the side watching everyone with a stern expression. Loki, cuffed and muzzled, stood beside him. His eyes flicked to Tony immediately, and he shifted, bumping Thor and making the blonde god look towards Tony.
With a quick glance around, Thor motioned with his head towards the empty room next door, leading Loki in quickly so as not to be spotted. Tony followed, curiously.
"Friend Stark, tell my brother what you told me!" Thor motions towards his bound brother with an encouraging smile.
Tony raises an eyebrow as he speaks. "About the fuzziness? You said that had something to do with your 'visage'."
Tony ignores how he can almost feel Loki's eyes snap to him, keeping his own eyes on Thor, or well, behind Thor.
"Correct! Friend Banner mentioned it as well, but not to as of an extent!" Thor was looking at Loki as he explained this, the mischievous god watching Tony with matched curiosity.
"Loki has asked me to translate him exactly; he's going to explain why you see us as fuzzy in words I won't understand." Thor is smiling as he says this, looking back at Tony.
"Asked you? Can he, like, mindspeak with you?"
Thor looks surprised and confused, his eyes snapping to Loki for a few moments before saying, "Ah. It seems the form you see of him can not speak at the moment. Loki says, Yes, but also no."
Tony wipes a hand across his face and uses the other to wave the conversation onwards. "Loki says to tell the Star-Bearer that the passive seidr of the realm wouldn't allow its inhabitants to gaze upon incomprehensible sights, as all realms do; it makes us into the most comprehensive sight it can so as not to break your puny mortal minds- Loki! Be nice! I could do this without you." Thor snaps half-heartedly.
"So what, you're so Lovecraftian horror creatures?" Tony asks, making both gods look at him with confusion.
"Loki is correct; we should just show you. I will go first, as I am a bit more manageable than my brother, for he is a father and not purely Asgardian."
"What the hell does that mean?" Tony doesn't get an answer, as when he looks back at the thunder god, his eyes sting and a headache starts forming instantly as he looks over the new being taking up most of the space in the room.
The creature is tall, with a centaur-like body; its hindmost legs are long with two cloven toes and a long, undocked sheep tail, and its remaining four limbs resemble those of bears if bears were the size of trains, each paw the size of Hulk's chest. The length of his now elongated body was covered by three sets of massive black and white feathered wings and brown shaggy fur, leading up a short neck to what looked like a bear's head, covered in what must be a hundred goat horns of various species and a very long beak much like a woodpecker's. His blue eyes were a massive cracking- no lightning-shaped line leading nearly halfway down the front length of his body. Static sparked and danced between the furs and feathers and arched between the horns and giant bear claws.
Tony was frozen in place (DANGER his mind insisted) as the massive creature opened its beak, revealing thousands of teeth, and let out a horrifying sound of grating scraping that had Tony flinching and covering his ears.
And then it's gone. Thor- or least the humanish visage of him- was back where he had once stood with an apologetic look on his face. "Apologies, friend Stark! I forgot you did not possess all-speak and wouldn't understand me."
Tony rubbed his temples and tried not to whimper at the pain of his headache as he spoke up. "Jesus, okay, Thunderpaws, give me a minute to recover before you speak."
"Loki says as long as you are not bleeding from any orifices, you may perceive his true visage, if you'd like. He is much more overwhelming than I." Thor's voice is much quieter this time, speaking up when Tony looks over at him to get the image of his other- his true- form out of his mind's eye.
"Not bleeding yet at least, but explain what you meant by Loki having children making him less manageable first?"
Thor is chuckling, visibly sparking in excitement at showing off his true form- he would surely explain all of it after- Tony would force him to if he had too.
"Loki says we take on all aspects of ourselves, creatures and things we hold sacred, when we first eat Idunn's apple and become Aesir. Loki has five children. Sorry, Brother, he had five children; now he has three. So he has aspects from the five of them. He also has aspects from his birth heritage."
Tony feels more prepared when he blinks and Loki is changing- he wasn't.
Loki's body is distinctly serpentine, with eight long, hairy, spider-like legs that reach above him before bending down to touch the floor on solid, hoofed feet. His foremost and hindmost legs were covered in fur and ended in clawed paws as wide as or wider than Thor's paws had been- still bent up like the spider legs. He had a hundred sets of dark feathered wings- black or a really dark brown and his body was covered in dark green scales. A thousand thousand eyes peeking through and between even scale and feather. His body had no distinct end, seeming to go on forever and never, but his head was that of a wolf, with a short but sharp beak curled and pointing downwards.
When Tony's eyes looked away from Loki's face (the voice in his mind had frozen in cold panic; it could not even begin to comprehend the danger this being felt) his eyes tracked thick black lines that trailed down his body to three cuffs of rough, gray, stone-like material linked by an old, red, rusted chain that is broken in several parts and connected to a chain that leads to nothing. They're old, far older than he is, but there are clearly new, solid, shiny metal cuffs that trail down the entirety of his body, connected by glowing golden chains that also loop around his beak, not holding it shut, but Loki's eyes are green.
Tony blinks as he wakes up, Thor and Loki- desguised once more- looking down at him with looks of concern and curiosity. Tony's hand wipes his face and comes back dark red with drying blood.
"Friend Stark? My brother apologizes; he merely got excited at the prospect of you seeing our true forms!" Tony doesn't hear whatever Thor is saying, the ringing in his ears growing louder as he stares at the chained Loki. Who has green eyes. Green eyes that were dark blue just hours ago-
"Friend Stark?" Tony jumps, turns, and offers Thor his best media grin.
"Don't worry, Build-A-Bear. The bargain bin here was a very impressive sight." Tony ignores how he's now hyperaware of Loki's face fluttering like he was grinning and how Thor's body twitches like his human disguise cannot portray whatever movement he had made.
"Let us make haste to return to the man, Fury, so he does not wonder where we have been." Thor is grinning; Tony can feel how excited both Gods were at being seen.
Later, it's Natasha who brings it up again, days before the Avengers scattered to the winds again, leaving him alone in his tower to grasp the concept of eternity alone.
"So, what was comprehending the gods like?" Her question makes Steve and Bruce look over from where they were scrolling through media networks, and Clint raises an eyebrow in question.
"What makes you think I ever got the opportunity?"
"I watched you sneak away with them during the debriefing." All of their eyes are on him, but the weight of their gazes is nothing-
"Y'know Sid from Toy Story? A lot like his toys, actually."
The redirection works well; Steve is now asking Bruce about Toy Story, and Clint is trying to prod Natasha for answers while she's still watching Tony. For once, her gaze holds no pressure.
He has so much work to do.