Wanting to Know You
He didn’t want to admit it, but he hated her for it. Hated her for coming in and ruining his life. His life was absolutely normal, well as normal as it could be. He was in charge of this organization to keep the canon in every single Spider-Man and Spider-Woman’s lives. And now it felt like his whole world was being turn upsdie down.
He didn’t hate her, he knew that the moment you two met. He hated feeling that he could be so weak to something so damn fast.
He could and would fall on his knees for you if she had asked him to.
Why would he deny himself this? It wasn’t the fact he is with you in every timeline, but more so he wanted to have you in his presence even before he knew her identity.
All she would have to do is say ‘no’ and he would leave her alone.
But he could tell, he knew that she wanted him just as badly, if not more.
At the very least, he would convince her to listen to him, to understand where he was coming from.
…
Stella
I watched as a Kraven was being sent home in the “Go Home Machine.” Bright lights flashed everywhere, the look in his eyes was utterly terrified.
Hobie was right, this was totally humane.
I sighed and while sitting on the desk I lifted up my knee and rested my chin on it. Why did this have to be so hard? It had been two weeks since Miguel and I figured out who I was, what we meant towards each other in every other universe. I’d be lying if I said I couldn’t see myself falling. Falling hard for the man everyone was so scared of.
He was an absolute menace when it came to other Spiders. The way he would snarl at Peter B was a sight to behold. The way he was always so short with Lyla, and she wasn’t even real. Gwen too for that matter, granted she was a teenager, I got his feelings sometimes. He was scary to everyone else, just a big man, fangs, and always aggressive.
But with me it was different. Almost sweet. I knew he tried acting indifferent with me, he didn’t want to show any biases since he claimed this would be nothing. But I could tell otherwise. When he would stare at me like I was capable of shattering this world. When he would break that same eye contact when I caught him, having him look the other way and pretend he wasn’t looking. When he would personally get me from my Earth 999 to go on a mission, instead of just pinging my watch.
The most important feature, he never got angry at me. As if it were physically impossible for him to be upset in your presence.
I smiled to myself, yeah I could fall so damn easy .
I stood up once Kraven went back to his proper dimension. Looking over at Margo I knew something was off. We became fast friends since most of the time I was there to send off the anomalies. She frowned and zipped towards me.
“What is it, Margo?” I asked.
She sighed, “You know we’re friends right?”
I nodded, “Of course, is something wrong?”
She paused and grabbed me by the shoulders, “You know I know something is up with you and the brood master right?”
My eyes widened. There was no way I could just tell her ‘I look like Miguel’s dead wife from every universe,’ right? Would she understand what could happen to us? How much trouble we could cause if we were to form something more than boss and employee?
I shook my head slightly, “Nothing is happening with us, he treats me the absolute same as everyone else.”
“Girl he literally threatened to send Hobie to the coldest spider dimension the other day because he brought his empanada ‘too cold.’”
“I’m sure he would flay me if I did that.” I argued, though I doubted that.
Margo laughed, “Right, and the sky isn’t blue.” She pretended to wipe a single tear away. “I’m telling you he treats you differently, we’ve all heard him call you pet names in Spanish, ‘Cariño.’
I paused, going beat red, “He uh…calls everyone that?”
I couldn’t lie to save my damn life, this was ridiculous.
“I call her cariño because it gets on her nerves, right Stella?” his booming voice came down the hallway.
I nodded my head fast, “Yep, exactly, I absolutely loathe it.”
Miguel fit himself right by my side, Margo went back to the tech at the desk, acting as if he wasn’t here. I could see her smirking as if we just proved her right.
“You’re with me the rest of the day unfortunately, mi araña.” His red eyes bore into my own, and I was suddenly very aware I didn’t have my mask on.
Groaning, I walked ahead of him. I knew I would be with him today after the Kraven incident, today we were back in his office doing more research. But I was annoyed, he just proved Margo right, and I knew eventually I would have to be honest about this.
He caught up easily, “Sorry, I can’t help it.” He knew I was pissed.
I rolled my eyes and stopped him dead in his tracks. I pointed a finger into his broad chest, “No, you need to listen, Miguel.” His eyes widened, “You realize they know you treat me differently.”
“And?”
I was fuming, “ And I don’t want to be singled out! I worked so hard to be where I was, I’ve been Spider-Woman alone since I was 16 Miguel. Like everyone else! It’s been 10 years and while I’m grateful I have a whole Society now, I don’t want people thinking I’m here as one of your favorites Miguel.” It was vicious I know, but the honest truth.
I could literally see his heart breaking and I hated it, I hated making him feel this way.
“Stella, I’m sorry, I didn’t know you felt this way.” He frowned.
I took my finger off of him, sighed, and grabbed his slack hand in mine. I pulled him all the way to his office. I didn’t need to be feeling bad over this, but it was like I was trapped in my thoughts for the past two weeks. We needed to talk.
When we entered I sat him down on one of the many couches and stood in front of him. God he looked miserable. God he looked so handsome.
When I first met him, it was like he was never happy, always moody, upset, and insufferable to be around. But since the truth came out, he’s never looked better, or acted better than he did now. And I hated how it was because I looked like someone he thought he was destined to be with.
“Miguel.” I waited till he looked up at me. “I have a question for you.”
“Anything.”
“Are you treating me this way, only because I look like her?”
“Anything but that.” He frowned. “ Mi araña, you are her.”
I shook my head, “You didn’t even like my presence until like, two weeks ago.”
He rolled his eyes, “I did say you didn’t annoy me.”
“That shouldn’t equate to liking me.” I scoffed. “You only like me because you think you have to be with me.”
He stood up, his large form towered over me. The way the shadows danced over his face contrasting the lights from all the monitors, he truly looked scary. He surged forward and placed a large hand over the side of my neck, pushing me back until the back of my knees hit the couch behind me.
“Okay now you’re just taking it too far Miguel.” I rolled my eyes and placed my hand over his on my neck. “Miguel you can’t possibly like me for any other reason than you think we should be together. Because I look like her. Well Miguel, I’m not her. I never will be, I’m me.”
And sometimes I wish I were someone else.
“And?” He questioned, lifting a brow up.
“And that means you shouldn’t like me.”
“Stella, I want to like you for you. I want to get to know you, your dimension of you, not some other version of you.” He could tell I didn’t look convinced, so he kept going. “You do know that I have never been with a Stella in any dimension before, right?”
I shook my head, I had no idea. “Okay, but you went to another dimension to have a family.”
His eyebrows furrowed, “Stella was already dead, I never fell in love with her, I just saw that Miguel looked happy, surrounded by people that loved him. He wasn’t Spider-Man in his universe, he never had that burden. The only thing wrong was him getting shot, him dying.”
“You think Spider-Man is a burden?” My mouth gaped open a bit, and I looked into his eyes. “What, do you hate it?”
“I don’t like what I have to do sometimes. My Spider-Man upbringing is wildly different than yours or others. You already know that I used to do gene-splicing, well because of that I’m quite literally merged with a spider.” He explained.
“I know how you became Spider-Man, Miguel, why you have different abilities than most.”
He shook his head, “I’ve had a lot happen, let's just say that… Between my brother Gabe, losing my family, the addiction, and being utterly used by Alchemax. To top it off, me ruining a universe and all those people dying, I just--”
I placed my other hand on his cheek and moved it down to cover his lips, “Shhhh..” I tried crooning. I didn’t want him to panic or freak out.
He shut his eyes and took a few deep breaths out of his nose.
I pulled my hand away and let it drop to my side. “Miguel, I want to know you, I want to understand why me in other dimensions want you, and only you. I’m sorry for suggesting that you only wanted me because you thought you had too.” I frowned and looked down.
Miguel slid his hand that was on my neck over my jaw and under my chin. He lifted my head up with a touch so gentle it almost put me to tears. “So let us try, preciosa.”
I felt the corners of my lips turn up, “That’s a new one.”
“I want to be able to use my language when it comes to you Stella.” He paused, “I shouldn’t do it near other Spiders.”
I shook my head, “It’s not that I don’t like being called that, I do Miguel. It’s just… I don’t want them to judge me.”
“Why would they judge you? For being with me?”
“No, never that. I said it before, I just don’t want them to assume I’m your right hand Spider out of favoritism.” I explained.
“Who cares if I do have a favorite?” He tightened his hold on my face, but never hurt me.
“And that would be me?”
“Of course.” He smirked.
I rolled my eyes and huffed out a breath, letting it fan across his suited hand. I wish he didn't have his suit on, I would kill for the skin-to-skin contact.
And maybe he had a point. Why should I care if Miguel shows a preference to me over other Spiders? It’s clear when he has his favorites, Ben and Jess to name a few. Ben was always on thin ice with Miguel though, he wasn’t the sharpest tool in the shed. So why shouldn’t I be one of his favorites as well?
The one thing still holding me back was who I looked like-- or who I was in Miguel’s eyes. He said he never once loved me in other dimensions, however he knew we were destined to go down that path. What if he was forcing it for the sake of fate?
“Fate shouldn’t be pushed, it should just happen.” I spoke my thoughts aloud.
He shook his head and moved his hand to the back of my head, his fingers threading into my braid. “P reciosa, fate was meeting you for the first time in your dimension. Fate was finding out who you were. Fate was me finding you, even though I’m not on your Earth, and you aren’t in mine.”
“You may have gotten me there, Miguel.” He knew, he knew I felt the same deep down. “So where does this leave us? An Impasse?
“An impasse means there is no more progress-- I think we should try getting to know each other a bit more, hm?” He grinned, showing his fangs.
You could work with that, after all he knew of the other Stella in that universe, he knew nothing of the you that stood in front of him. “Deal, O’Hara.”
“Deal.”
…
Miguel
“Lyla, is she lying?” I asked the holographic life form that was next to Stella.
Lyla glitched out and then popped out in front of Stella’s face. “Hmmm… Her vitals haven’t skyrocketed, so I’d say no Miguel.”
“So you don’t believe me.” Stella responded with her arms crossed against her chest.
“Well, how was I supposed to believe that you actually can’t shoot your organic webs anywhere else? I’m just saying I’m genetically 50% spider, and I can’t shoot them anywhere else.”
“Aren’t yours a virtual part of your suit?” She asked while tilting her head, it had me doing a double take-- adorable.
I shook my head and chuckled, “Yes and no, the suit and webs are virtual, I live in the future after all. But without my suit I can in fact make my own, I have organic webs like you, cariño.
“Okay but implying the question of if I can shoot them out of my ass?” She rolled her eyes.
“Again, I’m 50% spider, and I can’t do it. Scientifically, spiders should be able to.” I reminded her.
She snorted a laugh, “Alright, Alright point made.”
She and I became closer after our talk a week ago. Instead of going around shut off from each other, not knowing the other's intentions, we now talked and visited each other almost every day.
I was in her room in her apartment on Earth-928. Her room was simple, cute, and it fit her personality. From her bed, which she was laying on, being nothing but pitch black for the bedding yet had a colorful arrangement of what she called ‘plushies.’ To her desk, where I was seated, having a simple laptop, monitor, and knick knacks filling every inch of the flat surface. She had plants everywhere in her apartment, including her room. And--
Meow.
Did I mention she had a cat? His name was Jeff, I never understood the name, but she claimed giving cute animals strangely human names was hilarious.
Jeff was at the bottom of the chair I was sitting at, rubbing against my legs over and over. He was an orange cat, utterly destructive, but cute. I was glad he was keeping her safe in this dimension when I couldn’t.
I gave her a once over on her bed, not that she needed someone to keep her safe, she could do that on her own.
“So,” She started, sitting up so quickly I imagined she would be dizzy. “Do you just wear that suit 24/7?”
I sighed and reverted my suit back all the way revealing a simple black shirt and sweats. “No, of course not.” I chuckled when her mouth dropped. It was true, I didn't think she had seen me in my normal clothes.
“Don’t make fun of me, I thought you were just naked under your virtual suit.” She bursted out laughing, making Jeff scurry away.
I choked on my laugh. Nothing could have prepared me for that, “ Ay, dios, no! I wear normal clothes under it, imagine if something happened and my suit deteriorated away!”
The reddening in her cheeks told me she had imagined that exact scenario. Hm, interesting. Maybe I’d have to test that one out sometime soo--
“Miguel,” Her serious voice took me out of those thoughts, “Thank you, honestly.”
I stood up and walked to her bed, and sat down. Her form jostled as I sat, and I was right against her legs buried in the comforter. I placed one of my hands on her shin and she smiled up at me.
“Que? Why the ‘Thank you?’”
“For being patient with me, for letting me get to know you.” She almost whispered.
It had been like this for a week, it almost felt like our own personal holiday. Whether it was 20 Questions in my lab, late night talks in her room, even going out and exploring each other’s universe, we were hardly separated.
And I felt like I had gotten to know the real her within this week, and I knew there was so much more to get to know. I didn’t know Gabi’s mother, that Stella. I knew of her, knew that version of me fell in love with her. If my Stella was anything like the other, then I could see that same future. I could see just how easy it would be to fall, it would be exactly like falling: effortless.
Stella… My Stella.
Mi preciosa.
Mi tesoro.
I leaned my form closer to hers, and placed my hand on her cheek. Ah, she was so soft. I cursed my suit from keeping me from touching her like this and rubbed her cheek with my thumb. I could feel her breath hitch and her mouth opened.
She was so pretty. Too pretty for me.
Her cheeks reddened and my mouth was practically hovering over hers, our breaths were shared. If either one of us moved, we would kiss, and I don’t think I could stop if that happened.
“Tell me no, tell me to back away.” I suggested.
“I can’t.” She closed her eyes, “Not anymore.”
“Mi araña, por favor…” I whispered. I didn’t want her to regret this later, for her to think it was too soon. And who knew maybe it was too soon.
I didn’t give a damn.
Just as I was about to press her lips against mine, my watch started pining. It was Ben fucking Riley calling about an anomaly on Earth-562. I groaned, audibly groaned.
I backed away from her waiting lips and yelled, “Dios mío, no puedo más!” I followed it with a string of curse words I should not be using in front of a lady in Spanish.
When I got back to Nueva York I knew I was going to destroy something. I hadn't been this pissed in a minute. Hopefully Ben had the brains to know to stay away from me after I dealt with this.
Stella grabbed either side of my face with her hands forcing me to look at her. God she wasn’t even scared of my temper, she understood me, understood why.
“Go get ‘em, Miguel. And then you can hurry back to me.” It was the exact thing I needed to hear at the moment. I was about to pull away when she used all her might to surge me forward.
Her lips pressed against my own for one quick chaste kiss.
My watch opened a portal behind me and I didn’t care, I couldn’t care at that moment. All that existed in the world was her.
She pulled back fast and smiled, showing her elongated canines, like my own. And she pushed me into the portal, sending me to deal with work first.
Ben was definitely going to pay when I saw him.