Ashley Marin
“Do you still love Hanna’s Dad?” I asked, watching as Hanna’s Mum Ashley walked into the kitchen. I was staying at the Marin's house while my Mum was visiting my Dad in Texas. Ashley was just getting home from work now, Hanna was either upstairs or out with Caleb. I had lost track.
“Emily, when I told you to help yourself. This wasn’t what I meant,” Ashley said, taking the open bottle of wine away from me but also still pouring herself a glass.
“You didn’t answer my question.”
“A part of me will always love him, he did after all give me Hanna. But, no. I don’t love him anymore.”
“When do you stop loving someone?” I asked.
“What’s going on Emily?” Ashley asked back.
“Just answer the question please.”
“When it came to Hanna’s Dad and I, he seemed to have just fallen out of love with me. Fallen out of love for the life we had together, he wanted something more or something different. I fell out of love for the way he treated Hanna. How can you love a man who treats his daughter like that? The cheating also played a part in it as well,” Ashley explained as she took a huge swig of wine.
Ashley asked “Now are you going to tell me what’s going on?”
“It’s nothing. I’m sorry for drinking your wine. It was just one of those days and I needed something or I was either going to break something or hurt someone.” Standing up, I exited from the kitchen and made my way up to the room I was sharing with Hanna.
Hanna Marin
Walking into Hanna’s bedroom I was surprised Hanna was actually home, I could’ve sworn she had gone out and I don’t really remember seeing her come home.
“My Mum bust you with the wine?” Hanna asked teasingly.
“Something like that,” I said, dropping down onto my makeshift bed.
“Why were you drinking anyway? It’s not like you to be drinking.” Hanna questioned coming to lay down on the makeshift bed with me.
“Do you love him?” I asked.
“Who?”
“Caleb? Who else?”
“Of course, I do.”
“And did you love Sean?”
“I don’t know. I think Sean was someone I wanted to be with. But I don’t think I actually loved him, I liked him.”
“And your Dad?”
“Emily, why are you asking me this?”
“Just answer me, please.” I said looking up at Hanna, knowing she couldn’t not answer me when I gave her my best eyes.
“He’s my Dad, so of course I’m always going to love him. Despite all the pain and hurt he caused me and Mum, I still love him.”
“I guess that’s the thing, love is pain and love can hurt.”
“Seriously, Emily what’s going on?”
“It’s nothing. I better get some sleep.”
“Okay,” Hanna said, making an attempt to move but I quickly grabbed her arm.
“Can you stay here, please? Just until I fall asleep.”
“Of course, Em. Anything for you.” Hanna settled back down next to me and I couldn’t help but rest my head on her shoulder. Soon enough the problems circling around in my drifted off into nothingness as I fell into nothingness.
Ella Montgomery
“Hey, is anyone in there?” a voice asked me and I looked up to see Ella or Mrs Montgomery - Aria’s Mum sitting down next to my desk and the classroom was empty.
“Did I fall asleep?” I asked confused.
“No, you just seemed to have been staring off into space,” Mrs Montgomery explained.
Mrs Montgomery then jokes “No one else could get away with that, with me. Not even Aria but somehow you do.”
“Thank-you. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to.”
“I know,” Mrs Montgomery reassured me.
“Is everything okay?”
“Why did you get back together with Aria’s dad?” I asked.
“Emily,” Mrs Montgomery sighed.
“Please just answer my question?” I asked.
“It wasn’t easy. Aria’s Dad really hurt me when he cheated on me. But I could never stop loving him, not really and I guess our love just brought us back together.”
“Why do people cheat?”
“I wish I knew that Emily.”
“You didn’t get back together for the sake of the children did you?”
Mrs Montgomery laughed and said “No, Emily. I think Aria actually lost a little bit of respect for me when I did take her Dad back.”
“But, it was for the love you two shared?”
“Exactly. Now, is everything okay Emily?”
“Yeah. I should probably head off to lunch.”
“Okay but please come to me if you need anything.”
“Sure thing,” I said while packing up my belongings and leaving the classroom. I felt absolutely none the wiser.
Aria Montgomery
“Are you even writing any of this down?” a voice asked next to me.
“What?” I said, looking at Aria who I was laying on her bed with studying. After finding out I slacked off during English, Aria insisted I came around after school and she caught me up on everything I had missed.
“Sorry, what did you say?”
“What’s gotten into you today? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this distracted.”
“It’s nothing. Can I ask you a question?”
“Of course you can,” Aria said, squeezing my shoulder.
“Did you love Fitz?”
“Where’s this coming from?”
“Please just answer my question.”
Aria sighed “Of course, I did. You know, I did.”
“But you don’t anymore?”
“No, I don’t.”
“How did you fall out of love with him?”
“I don’t think I fell out of love with him. I think we just changed and became different people, wanting different things.”
“When you broke up, how long did it hurt?”
“What makes you think it still doesn’t hurt. When you love someone as deeply as I love Ezra, it never truly goes away. He was my first love after all.”
“Funny, I always thought Noel was your first love.”
Aria chuckled “He was my first crush. But Ezra, he was my first real adult relationship. The amount of things I was, or we were willing to give up just to be with each other.”
“And in the end, it didn’t matter?”
“I don’t see it like that.”
“Sure, I don’t love feeling in pain but I would never take that feeling of loving someone and being loved by someone for granted.”
“You’ve always been a romantic at heart, haven’t you,” I teased.
“Are you going to tell me what this is all about?”
“It’s really nothing, I promise.”
“You know, I don’t believe you right.”
“And that’s what makes you so great, Aria. You don’t push.”
“I want to, I just know you and if I push, you run.”
“Can I ask you another question?”
“Of course, you really don’t have to ask.”
“Can I kiss you?”
“Wow, where did that come from?” Aria asked, shocked.
“I’ve just always been curious. I mean it’s like you said, Ezra was willing to give a lot up for you and I always wondered what that was.”
“Gez, thanks,” Aria said sitting up.
“You know what I meant,” I said, following Aria and sitting up as well.
“I really don’t understand why you want to but yes you can kiss me, if you really want to.” I smiled at Aria’s sweetness and kindness before slowly leaning forward. I wanted to give Aria every opportunity to push me away or stop this from happening, but she didn’t seem to want this to stop. When my lips finally landed on hers, nothing really happened. I didn’t really expect anything to. It wasn’t until Aria kissed me back that I felt. I felt the passion and the love Aria could express through one piece of movement.
When we pulled back, Aria asked “Did that answer anything for you?”
“Yes and No. I see now why Ezra was willing to give everything up for you but it doesn’t answer my main question.”
“What’s your main question?”
“Why do people cheat? People like your Dad, Hanna’s Dad, hell even Spencer’s Dad. I just don’t understand cheating.”
“That’s because you are a kind and decent human being, Emily,” Aria leant forward and pecked my cheek.
“Thank-you, I probably should be getting back to the Marin house. I won’t put it past Hanna to send out a search party.”
“No, I don’t either,” Aria laughed.
As I was packing up my things, Aria spoke up “I’m sorry I couldn’t give you the answers you were looking for.”
“It’s okay. At least I can say I got to kiss the Aria Montgomery.”
“Shut up,” Aria said before pushing me out of her bedroom.
Mike Montgomery
Walking out of Aria’s room, I was very surprised to see Aria’s younger brother Mike standing there.
“Did you really kiss my sister?” Mike asked.
“Yes, I did.”
“Are you two an item now?”
“No, we aren’t.”
“Why not?”
“We just aren’t who each other wants.”
“Right, and who do you want?”
“That’s the thing right, I don’t know. I used to know but now, it’s all gone to shit.”
“I’m sorry, Emily.”
“It’s whatever. Hey, have you ever been in love?”
“Not really. I’ve had a ton of crushes but they have never really amount to anything more. I’m too young for it anyway.” I shared a laugh with Mike at that before walking away, still feeling unsure of myself and everything else.
Veronica Hastings
“Emily,” a voice called out to me and I looked up to see Mrs Hastings had now entered the cafe I had asked her to meet me up at.
“Hey,” I said.
“Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, I think so.”
“So, why are we here?” Mrs Hastings asked as she accepted the coffee a waitress had brought over to her and she was now happily sipping on it.
“I wanted to ask you some questions.”
“Should I have brought a lawyer?” Mrs Hastings teased but ushered for me to continue.
“Do you love Spencer’s Dad?”
“Love is complicated, Emily. It doesn’t always make any sense. You know us Hastings feelings aren’t easy for us.”
“Ain’t that the truth,” I mumbled under my breath.
“Spencer’s Dad and I have done a lot of things to hurt each other. If it weren’t for the girls, I don’t think we’d be together.”
“So you stay together for the children's sake?”
“No. It was basically out of convenience. I love him, I do or I did. We just don’t want to split and so that’s why we are choosing to stay together.”
“That’s pretty messed up.”
“Is it perfect or ideal? No. However, this is what works for us. Everyone needs someone Emily, even if it’s just so you don’t have to sleep alone.”
Mrs Hastings then asked “Are you going to tell what this is all about?”
“I wish I could but I can’t.”
Mrs Hastings nodded her head before stating “One piece of advice I can give you Emily is something in life are worth fighting for and other things, well it’s like beating a dead horse. You’ve just got to learn which is which.”
“Right,” I replied. Realising none of this was helping me whatsoever.
Spencer Hastings
“Do you remember when we were kids, I would come over here and we’d race our bikes out to the furthest point we could think of. Before we eventually ended up at a lake and would throw rocks, seeing who could go the furthest?” I had come over to the Hastings house wanting to spend some time with Spencer. Which we had mostly spent in silence, which I of course had to break with my questions.
“Of course, I do Em.”
“I miss those days. I miss being a little kid.”
“Me too,” Spencer said, resting her head on my shoulder.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Of course.”
“Do you love him?”
“You mean Toby?”
“Yeah.”
“Yeah, I do. He’s really good to me and for me. He’s like the perfect guy, which you know.”
“I do,” I laughed with Spencer.
“Did you love Ian and Wren?”
“No. Well, at least not the way I love Toby. I think I mostly got with them to piss Melissa off.”
“Right,” I said, nodding my head at the mention of Melissa being brought up.
“What’s going on Emily?” Spencer asked, sitting up to look at me.
“It’s funny that. I’ve been going around asking everyone different questions and they’d ask me why, and I couldn’t tell them. But I guess you're the one person I have to tell.”
“I don’t understand.”
“You know better than most people, right that you can’t help who you fall for.”
“Yeah, of course I know that.”
“Right, so when I tell you that I was seeing Melissa, you can’t judge or get mad at me.”
“Melissa? Melissa, my sister, Melissa?” Spencer asked, shouted as she stood from the couch and began to pace.
“Yeah, I thought this would happen.”
“How long?”
“It was only for a couple of months, four at the most.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I didn’t exactly think you’d approve.”
“You're right, I wouldn’t have but I probably would’ve come around. Am I to understand you aren’t seeing each other right now?”
“That’s the thing, we are kind of on a break.”
“Like Ross and Rachel?”
“Not exactly, more so like a pause. While I figure something out.”
“What do you need to figure out?” Spencer asked.
“If I can date someone who cheated on me,” I answered, wiping the tears that rolled down my cheek.
“Melissa, cheated on you?”
“Yep. It was my one condition. I don’t do cheaters, you know this.”
“I do. God, Em. I’m so sorry.”
“Do you have anything we can drink?”
“What like soda?”
“I was thinking vodka but sure.”
“Em,” Spencer warned.
“Forget it,” I said with a sigh.
“Who did Melissa cheat on you with?”
“Does that really matter?”
“Yes, cause if it was a stranger then it probably meant nothing but if-”
I cut Spencer off with “It was Ian. Melissa hooked up with Ian Thomas.”
“Oh,” was all Spencer could say.
“I wish it was a stranger, just someone who wasn’t Ian Thomas.”
“Does this stem from Alison?”
“Of course, everything always leads back to her with me doesn’t it.”
“What are you going to do?” Spencer asked, sitting back down on the couch next to me.
“I was really hoping you’d be mad at me for seeing Melissa and forbid me from seeing her, or something like that.”
Spencer laughed, asking “You really thought I’d do that?”
“A girl can dream, can’t she?” I said back with my own laugh.
“You know I never would’ve put you two together but I can see it. Other than not being blonde, she’s exactly your type.”
“I do not have a thing for blondes,” I said back annoyed.
“Sure you don’t, Em,” Spencer said as she rather condescendingly patted my knee.
“What am I going to do Spencer?” I asked, standing up from the couch and starting to pace.
“If Melissa hadn't cheated on you with Ian, would’ve been able to move past it?”
“Maybe with time. But it wasn’t someone random. It was Ian, of all people.”
“You never told us, what exactly happened with Alison and Ian?”
“Anytime Alison and I ever got remotely close, she’d run off and the next time I’d see her she’d be attached to him, some way or another. Then when things were calm, she’d come back to me before getting scared again and the whole thing would repeat itself over and over again.”
“Did you love her?” Spencer asked.
“Who, Alison?”
“Yeah.”
With a sigh, I looked up at the roof before looking back at Spencer and confessing “Of course I did. It was Ali, how could I not love her. We’d have these moments where it was just us and there was no one else around, and it was like magic.”
“That’s how first loves are supposed to be and feel like Em.”
“What? And then reality sets in? She’d get so fearful of having someone discover she likes girls that she runs away. Gets her whole family to move away and I never hear from her again?”
“Does anyone know of your relationship with Melissa?”
“No,” I replied with a laugh.
“Why would any girl I date want anyone to know they are dating me,” I said.
“Emily,” Spencer said with a saddened tone.
“It’s whatever,” I said, shrugging wanting to move on from that but this was Spencer she never lets anything go.
“Can you forgive her?”
“I don’t know Spence. I hate cheaters, you know this. She knew this, but she still did it and with Ian of all people.”
“I think you need to talk to her, Em. Find out why she didn’t want anyone to know about you two and also why she cheated on you.”
“I guess you're right. All roads lead back to her.”
“Also Em,” Spencer called, stopping me.
“Whatever you decide. Just know, you have my approval.”
“Thank-you Spencer. That means more to me than you’ll ever know,” I smile at Spencer before exiting from the house and into the backyard
Melissa Hastings
“Why Melissa?” I asked after knocking on the barn door and waiting for Melissa to open it.
“Why what?” Melissa asked.
“Why did you cheat on me?”
“I don’t know Emily.”
“Did I do something wrong?”
“No, of course you didn’t. You were even perfect.”
“Evidently not. You don’t cheat on people without a reason.”
“I guess,” Melissa started but stopped. Melissa stepped back and offered for me to come in. I took her up on her offer and moved to sit down on the couch.
“It wasn’t about you.”
“It’s not me, it's you, really,” I said with a scoff.
“I wanted to prove I wasn’t gay.”
“Because being gay, is to terrible right?”
“No. God, I’m doing this all wrong,” Melissa said, sitting down next to me.
“My family they don’t exactly approve of gays.”
“Your parents approve of me, don’t they?” I questioned confused.
“Yes but my grandparents, my aunties, my uncles, hell even some of my cousins. The way they talk about gays, as if they’ve got some diesease.”
“I saw Ian after that family reunion. He caught me at a moment of weakness. It meant nothing, which is why I told you. I felt nothing, except for shame. Because I knew how much it would hurt you.”
“But you still did it. Did you find out if you were gay or not, at least?”
“Yeah, definitely gay.”
“I could’ve told you that, I hope you know.”
“Yeah, I do.”
“You know my family aren’t exactly thrilled about my being gay, right?”
“No, I didn’t,” Melissa said, surprised.
“A few of my Mum's sisters stopped talking to her when they found out I was gay. They didn’t want me turning their kids gay.”
“How come you didn’t tell me?”
“You never exactly ask. It’s also not something you just bring into conversations.”
“I’m sorry Emily.”
“I know,” I sighed.
“Are we okay?”
“Why didn’t you want people to know about us? Is it just about your family or are you ashamed of me?”
“I am never ashamed to be with you Emily. It was all my family, I didn’t know how they’d go about accepting me being with you. I should’ve talked to you about it.”
“Yeah you should’ve. I could’ve set you straight, or I guess gay in our case,” I said, making Melissa laugh.
“I love you.”
“I know,” I smiled at hearing Melissa admit it.
“Do you still love me?” Melissa asked worriedly.
“You know, for the last week I've gone around to all my friends' parents and my friend asking how to forgive people. Asking if it’s possible.”
“And what did you find out?”
“Something I've always known. I wouldn’t care this much if I didn’t love you. It wouldn’t have hurt much if I didn’t love you. So, yes Melissa I still love you.”
“From now on I would like my friends to know we are dating and when you are ready I would like you to tell your parents, it doesn’t have to be everyone. I just can’t be a secret anymore.”
“Okay.”
“Okay,” I said, leaning over and kissing Melissa.
Emily Fields
It wasn’t as simple as that. These things never are but at the end of the day I love Melissa. I knew she was the one for me and maybe with a little bit of help from the ones around us, we’d be okay. All you can do is hope for the best, I guess.
The End.