Chapter 13
It was a hard week for James. His nightmares grew worse and many times he would wake up screaming.
He had sensed that many of the residents grew fearful of him. He heard their whispers talking about his screaming and even addressed his 'staring problem' between each other. Cassie told him to ignore them and that everyone had their 'problems'.
Even the weather was bad, rain storms occurred all week making the atmosphere even more gloomy than it was.
James sat in the rec center watching his open compass as the needle pointed north. Cassie sat next to him reading a book.
The rain tapped at a steady rhythm on the windows and voices chatted around the room.
But James mind swirled with each small glance people took, whispers, and laughs. It itched his brain and made his hand clench around the compass.
Quickly standing up James knocked over his chair making everyone glance his way. Rounding his shoulder James felt a fiery anger start to grow. He couldn't stand it being in there knowing people whispered. Of course people whispered he didn't even know who he was or if he'd ever know.
As anger filled his chest and he stormed out of the rec center. Cassie following him in a slight jog.
"James!"
He quickly reached the stairs and walked down two steps at a time, Cassie not able to catch up she kept calling his name.
Reaching the lobby he swung the door open and he ran out onto the street. The rain was now heavier and the sky a dark grey. With no jacket or umbrella James began to run.
The rain soaked him to the bone and his hair plastered his face, as he ran down the streets of Brooklyn. Running past a restaurant and then a gym his eyes clouded with tears, blurring his vision.
Then his shoulder slammed into something hard making him stumble and turn to face the thing.
It was a man carrying a dark blue umbrella. His eyes blue and hair blonde.
They both paused looking at each other. The blonde man's face looked James over his eyes with so much emotion behind them.
James hated the way he looked at him.
"Bucky?"
With one word it made James heart jolt, but he didn't know why. His face stoic and stone hard, he looked everywhere but the man then stared straight into his eyes, "Who the hells Bucky,"
The blonde man's was frozen staring at James. The amputee turned and began running through the rain again his heart pounding in his ears.
Pangs of emotion he never knew he possessed filled his head and heart making him feel heavy.
Who was that man?
James had made it back to the home and slowly came to a stop huffing for air. As he walked into the lobby water dripped from every part of him drenching the floor with puddles. His chest began to fill with a tightness and pain.
"James! You're soaking!" Cassie ran over then paused seeing James state, "Let's sit down,"
She grabbed his elbow leading him to the chairs that lined the lobby room. As she helped him down onto a chair she called out for the receptionist to call for some towels.
James clutched his chest and his eyes squinted shut. He took two deep breaths and opened his eyes as he calmed down.
Cassie now had a stack of towels and began covering James to warm him up, "What happened?"
"I saw a man in the rain...he knew me." James pulled the towel around his body closer, "And I think I knew him too... but I ran away,"
-
Later that night James sat up in his room and reached into his pocket for his compass, only to find it gone. He jolted up quickly from his seat and began throwing his clothes everywhere searching pockets and folds for it, but it was gone.
His one piece of his identity was gone.
Feeling frustrated James laid down onto his bed staring up at the ceiling and slowly succumbing to sleep.
And for once he didn't have a nightmare. Only a simple dream of the blue eyed, blonde man.
~
Steve was shocked. The man in the rain had looked just like Bucky.
But he was dead, it could have been Bucky.
As Steve walked in the rain through Brooklyn he replayed the moment over and over seeing the man's face play again in his mind.
Closing his umbrella Steve entered the restaurant and saw his friends sitting already at a table. Sam stuck his arm up acknowledging Steve's arrival.
"Hey Rogers!" Sam shouted with a smile.
Steve took a seat beside Natasha his face still trying to adjust to seeing the man earlier.
"What's wrong Captain?" Natasha asked seeing her friend's puzzled face.
Steve shook his head and gave a game grin, "I-I saw someone who looked like Buck. But I mean... jeez! He looked just like him!"
Sam and Nat shared a look, "Steve... no matter how much it looked like him, it's not Barnes,"
"I know, it's just been...lonely,"
"You've gotta get back out there Steve!" Sam exclaimed as he folded a napkin into a complicated form.
"Yeah... what about that guy who lives across from you?" Nat smirked.
Steve huffed a laugh, "Hmm you're funny,"
Later that night it still didn't sit right with Steve. Even if it wasn't Bucky, he felt a weird force telling him to go back to the place where he saw the man.
Under the dark sky the yellow street lights lit the way as Steve rode his motorcycle up the street. Stopping the vehicle Steve hopped off and onto the sidewalk.
At this time the streets were empty for the most part and the city was quite even for the 'city that never sleeps'.
Steve walked up the pavement looking around, he felt a pull but to what?
Then his foot collided with something small on the floor with a clink.
Looking down he saw something round and metal. Steve picked it up and rolled the brass object in his hand.
It was a compass. No. It was his compass.
Steve's heart pounded as he turned the compass to see the name James engraved into the brass.