Shikaku watched his five year old son run around the field, and he smiled sadly. One day, this boy, this five year old, would become a ninja. A genin. A chunin. A jonin. One day, this child would see death and blood and war. One day, this child won’t be innocent. Shikaku watches his son run around, and he realizes he has to teach his son these things. The things that will murder someone he will never know.
****
Shikamaru likes to complain a lot. He complains about how boring school is, he complains about how easy it is, he complains about how annoying some people are, etc. Shikaku pretends to read the paper as he listens to his sons stories, and his wife lectures Shikamaru on the importance of school, and Shikamaru comes back with something like ‘But it isn’t school, it’s ninja academy.” And Shikaku smiles behind his paper.
****
Shikaku was at the match where his son fought the sand ninja. She was quite a girl. She appeared quite intelligent, and was a very good ninja, but she was still no match for Shikamaru. Assuming Shikamaru didn’t give up, which he promptly did. Nevertheless, Shikaku was still proud of his son.
****
When Shikamaru became chunin shortly after the exams, Shikaku was overjoyed. Shikamaru complained a little less, although he still did, and he went on his first mission to recover their missing friend, Sasuke Uchiha. Shikaku watches his son leave the house, his hands in his pockets, still slouched over, but he had an energy. An energy of something exciting. Shikaku caught the energy too, and went out to see if Choza and Inoichi wanted to get together for some Ino-Shika-Cho time.
****
When Shikaku heard that the team had returned, he proudly asked where they were, and Tsunade told him they were all in the hospital. All of them. So he turned heel and left to the hospital. When he got there, he made his way to the emergency room where Shikamaru was sitting on a bench, his hands in his lap and his head bowed, a cast around his index finger. Shikaku was going to go over to his son but then he noticed the sand ninja. The girl he fought in the exams. Her legs were crossed, and she looked like she was about to lay down the line.
Shikaku sweat-dropped. He’d seen that look many times on his wife before. So he stayed right behind the corner, as he listened to the sand ninja speak, her voice clear and cool. Shikamaru received the lecture in silence, his head still bowed. He got up as Lady Tsunade walked in the room. Tsunade told Shikamaru that Choji and everyone else would be alright, and tension eased out of his son’s shoulders, and he received a lecture from Tsunade also.
Shikaku hated to do it, but as his soon walked his way, his head still bowed, he gave him a little lecture also. He watched his son’s shoulders shake as he cried, and Shikaku would wait till tonight to comfort him. That night, Shikamaru went to bed early. He closed his bedroom door and Shikaku heard him collapse.
He quickly opened the door, and Shikamaru was on the floor, his body curled half-way into a ball, tears falling from his eyes once again. Shikaku lay down on the floor, and held his son as he cried and recounted the mission, stating over and over again; “I could’ve lost them all.” He looked at the boy in front of him, and realized, he was in fact still only a boy. His only child, his son. He was only 12, and he almost faced the burden of 4 deaths. Shikaku stayed by Shikamaru’s side the whole night, and the head Nara watched the stars as his son slept beside him.
****
Some random times over the next few years, Shikamaru would spend a lot of time with sand ninja, who’s name was Temari, Shikaku learned. Shikaku learned quite a lot about the girl actually. Temari, was in fact also a genius, she was a night owl, she was a wind-user (obviously), she liked coffee, she had two brothers, and her favorite food was sweet chestnuts. When Temari spent her weeks in the Leaf Village, Shikaku and his wife offered there place, and Temari would graciously accept. She would go to bed in the guest room, early in the night like Shikamaru and Shikaku’s wife, but about an hour later, when Shikaku was still up, Temari would creep out and sneak into Shikamaru’s room.
Shikaku remembers once, with a fond smile, the first time he caught her going into his son’s room. The sand girl walked into the living room, as Shikaku was sitting there reading his paper, and the girl froze and Shikaku flipped his paper down and looked at the girl calmly. The normally calm girl looked so frightened he laughed, and that scared her even more, and he laughed even harder. He laughed so loud eventually Shikamaru sleepily shuffled out of his room, took the embarrassed girl by the hand, and sleepily shuffled back into his room.
Shikaku was still laughing when he went to bed that night.
****
Shikaku vividly remembers the look on his son’s face when he came home from the mission that killed his sensei. Shikamaru walked right past him, went to his bedroom, and Shikaku didn’t hear anything from there for about 24 hours. Shikaku was sitting outside, enjoying the stars, when his son walked out of his bedroom, not noticing him, sat down and lit a cigarette. A cigarette! Shikaku stood up, stormed over to his son and knocked the smoke out of his hand. The young Nara slowly turned his head towards his father, and the boys eyes held anger and so much grief.
Shikaku softened for a moment before standing back over his son. “Shikamaru, I know it’s hard to lose someone, but you don’t need to start dangerous habits because you want to forget about such things.” Shikamaru just got up and went back into his bedroom. When Shikaku went in there a couple of days later to play shogi with his son, per usual Sunday nights, he smelled cigarette smoke, and he knew his son was smoking in his bedroom, but he didn’t bring it up. Shikaku knew this would pass, and if it didn’t, his wife would lay down the line for him.
The two mostly played in silence, geniuses hard at work, but Shikamaru wasn’t putting up much a match as usual. His moves were reckless and lazy. Shikaku quietly brought up the subject of Asuma, and Shikamaru knocked the board clear across the room. Shikaku stayed sitting and waited for Shikamaru to speak. The boy sat there, tensed up and fists clenched and Shikaku braced himself for an attack. Shikamaru got up, and so did Shikaku, and he barely towered over the boy now, they were about the same height.
Shikamaru looked at him, and now the grief that was there was replaced by anger. Intense, careless anger. Shikaku stared his son down and lay down the line for the 16 year old once more. He turned and left, knowing what he must do, and as he closed the door, he saw his son’s face scrunch up and he yelled out silently for Asuma. Shikaku stood outside the door and prayed for his old friend as he heard Shikamaru sob and scream in his room.
****
Choji often came over to take care of Shikamaru during this time. Shikaku knew this boy was suffering as much as his son, and Shikaku watched Choji also, making sure the other young chunin would be okay too. He hoped Choza was taking care of the kind-hearted boy. Shikaku had enough to worry about with his own son, who he watched through the window as the emotionally exhausted chunin lay against his best friend, the two sharing potato chips and watching the clouds.
****
Shikaku had contacted the Hidden Sand Village, and asked for the Kazekage’s permission to send his sister, Temari, to the Leaf Village, as there was an emergency of sorts. The next day, Shikaku and everyone who was friends with Asuma went to his funeral. Except for Shikamaru. Two days later, Temari arrived, looking frantic.
“Is everything alright?! I got a message, and I expected... “
“It’s okay, Temari. I need your help, and it is kind of urgent.”
Temari nodded, following Shikaku to Shikamaru’s room. Before opening the door, Shikaku turned to the girl.
“Before you go in there, you must know, Shikamaru’s sensei died in battle about a week ago. It’s only been a week, I know, but I’m worried about him, and I don’t know what to do. Please, take care of him.”
Temari’s eyes had widened slightly, but then they turned into a determined glare. “I’ll do my best. Thank you.” Shikaku opened the door and Temari stormed in and Shikaku heard the sounds of Temari yelling at Shikamaru and Shikamaru groaning. Shikaku grinned. His son would be alright.
****
Shikamaru watches his 5 year old son run in the field, the little boy’s mother following close behind, a smile gracing her face as she laughed. Shikamaru looked at the little boy, and thought about his father. It’s been years since the war. Years since Shikaku died in battle, just like his sensei had. He hoped Asuma and Shikaku were watching over him, but more importantly, his son. He hoped the boy who ran around in the field wouldn’t face the horror he had at 12. He hoped the boy wouldn’t lose his sensei, or his father, any time soon. Shikamaru watched his son and his wife run around, and wondered.
Was this how you felt, watching me dad?