I Always Knew This Was Coming

Underlined - English

‘Italicised’ - Thoughts

In Text Bolded - Tailed Beast

*Bracketing Asterisk Around Italicised Text* - Thoughts in verse. Specifically, raps.

HATAKE KAKASHI

When Shikamaru - who has held a dozen nin fighting and struggling for an hour while backup arrived - drops the Shadow Jutsu mere seconds in, I know that something went wrong. When he emerges with a kunai launched straight at Anko’s back - luckily not landing before Genma knocked it out of the air with a well placed senbon - I flash hand signs for Ino to fix whatever was happening and fucking quick.

‘Fu and Torune and -’

But the thought is cut off by Anko crying out as what honest to god looks like a bolt of pure chakra hits her square in the chest and she drops like a stone.

‘Shit-!’

And as if summoning him with a thought, a wave of kikaichu swarm them. Calling the swarm a sizeable and destructive hive would be an understatement, and Sasuke begins to spit fire as Kiba - resident Aburame expert what with Shino on his team (and possibly in his pants) - begins to almost literally bark out orders to the team of where to hit and how.

Genma pulls out his tanto and begins to fight Danzo side by side with Naruto’s original and Kakashi himself. 

“And what do you think you’re doing?” Danzo hisses out in a shorter than brief lull in the fighting, yet again not dying from a lethal blow. 

Kakashi decides not to answer him, instead wasting the time to push up his headband and using his Mangekyo to tear into Danzo’s torso - eating into his side, shoulder, and a fair amount of his left arm.

The move quiets the battlefield for a single, deafening moment.

Then Danzo - a war hero and incredibly powerful shinobi - bellows with unrestrained rage.

And if they thought that Danzo was angry before, he was furious now. Livid.

The Shiamura screams of wordless ferality grates on Kakshi’s senses, nearly throwing him off just as the Warhawk, tearing at the bandages around his eye with his good arm, lunges at him with something unreadable and dark in his gaze.

Kakashi follows the movement reflexively, eyes locked on Danzo as a mess of red and black burns into his mind -

He can’t fully comprehend what’s happening, but he knows something is wrong when -

Nothing makes sense. The world is upside down and strange and -

Suddenly Danzo’s on fire and he can feel his feet coming out from under him.

The world burns red before black claims the Last Hatake.

OKURIMONO

When Kisame saw Itachi’s dead body he immediately flew into the kind of murderous rage reserved for the death of a friend, of family, of an irreplaceable comrade. His overwhelming chakra, returned with time and spiking dangerously with rage, rips through seals with brute force, injuring irreparable internally but allowing him to move.

It’s only the implementation of my new eye and the damage dealt to the Tailless Tailed Beast that saves me from a killing blow. I dodge - barely - and thank whatever stars I had left that I had the foresight to seal away all the weapons the two missing-nin had on them before I began to interrogate Itachi. If he had Samehada …

I wouldn’t be alive long enough to regret not sealing it.

I lunge back, Itachi’s altered eye still clutched in a fist ready to engage the Kiri nin again -

When a tentacle reaches out and snaps Kisame’s neck before he can even recognize that it’s there.

Shifting my focus abruptly, I’m face to face with Killer Bee … but it’s not. This Bee is strange, an energy coming off of him that reminds me of -

“Gyuki -” I breath in disbelief.

And if I hadn’t had his full attention before: I did now.

What do I do? What do I do?What else is there to do?

So I curtsey.

What the fuck brain.

UCHIHA SASUKE

The moment I can see the Mangekyo Sharingan - that Danzo somehow has - locked onto Kakashi’s wide, startled gaze I’ve pumped enough chakra into Amaterasu to burn the entirety of the disgusting man into nothing more than dust.

The drain is immediate, but I push the exhaustion aside long enough to lunge for Kakashi as his eyes roll back into his head, collapsing to the ground in a boneless heap.

“INO!” I scream, desperately hoping that the blonde has already fixed whatever the hell was going wrong with Shikamaru’s head. “We need you!”

She’s over in a flash, the displaced air filled with leaves of her Sushin. 

“What happened?” She demanded, hands glowing with chakra.

“Mangekyo - Danzo had one,” He answered britally, scanning what’s left of the team. 

Genma was clutching his side, holding pressure on a glancing blow from a ROOT agent as he single handedly slapped paralysis seal courtesy of Naruto on all the bodies on the ground, dead or alive or whatever the freaky in between would be.

Akamaru and Kiba both seemed unharmed for the most part, barring scrapes and exhaustion, and they leaned over Shikamaru as they fed the Nara heir sips of water as he began to come around. Naruto was sending clones to gather the paralysed figures as his main checked over Anko, frowning at the seal on her neck.

‘Take charge,’ a voice that sounded suspiciously like Noa nudged him, a laugh in her tone.

“Genma, take Shikamaru and go - get yourself checked out and have another Yamanaka check him just in case. Naruto, take Anko and make sure she doesn’t die. Send your clones to drop the lot of ROOT in T&I and more to clean up the area. We were never here. Akamaru, Kiba. Find the bases in Konoha, pronto, and report back to only one of the team or the Hokage directly.”

I turn back to Ino, watching as her eyes close as she runs her jutsu. “Is he safe to move?”

“Yes, but not right now.” She answers absentmindedly. “It was a genjutsu, a strong one. Probaby to try and plant something in his subconscious. The backlash of it never completing with Danzo’s death sent a shock through his system strong enough to knock him down for the count. Give me a moment to stabilize him …”

Agonizing seconds.

She looks up. We move.

OKURIMONO

“How do you know that name?” The Eight Tails demands in a bellow, impatient and dangerous. “Who are you, girl?”

‘Don’t bristle at the condescending sexist bijuu. He could kill you and he’s old. Like … Hinata’s dad. Don’t flip, he’s good under all of that.’

“They call me Okurimono now,” I tell him, hesitant to lie. “I know the name of the Bijuu only through word of mouth and rumor, passed down as stories among my people. I knew not the validity, and I hope not to have offended.”

“Hmph,” The Eight-Tails harrumphs. “Do not use it: you are not worthy.”

Shit. I curtsey again - lower. “Forgive me, Hachibi-sama, for I did not mean to offend. But might I impede on your time and attention further? I have news you will find essential.”

The three tails manifested whip back and forth with interest, and I find myself holding my breath as he considers my words. “You have healed Bee. I will hear your words.”

I summarize as quickly, concisely, and accurately everything I knew about Akatasuki, Tobi, the Zetsu, and Kaguya as clearly as I could. The great Ox-tapus seemed … angry. I couldn’t tell if that was good or bad.

“And how I am to know the validity of your words?” Gyuki snaps, not really angry at me but peeved with the situation. 

“I have no way to benefit from the increased wariness and vigilance of the Jinchuuriki and Bijuu of Kumo, nor those of other nations,” I reason softly, head bowed.

“And what,” The Eight-Tails considers. “Do you expect me to do?”

“Not get captured,” I answer automatically, but then I compose myself and my answer a bit more. “To warn Killer Bee. Get him to spread the message, to Nii Yugito and Gaara of the Sand. Talk to your siblings if you can. I suspect that your siblings of three, four, five, and seven have been overtaken. I suspect that if six has not been assaulted yet, they are near to being. None of us would want the consequences of the Rabbit Goddess’ awakening; please take the care needed to prevent that and preserve yourself.”

“Very well,” He acquiesced, rolling his shoulders and flexing his tails in a way wholing unfamiliar on Bee’s face and in the fluidity of his body. “Till next time, Okurimono no Chishiki.”

‘Gift of knowledge,’ I think. ‘I can work with that.’

I lean down and swiftly remove Itachi’s second eye, hesitant to linger, and speed off into the creeping dawn.

UZUMAKI-NAMIKAZE NARUTO

I slump back against the tall Harishima tree, feeling the bark press into my back with an aching familiarity. It isn’t long at all until another presence joins me.

“Scarecrow’s going to be out for a while,” Sasuke informs me, weariness creeping into his tone. “But Ino and her father both ran through his head with a fine tooth comb: there’s nothing there that shouldn’t be.”

“Other than copious amounts of porn,” I joke, laughter only a touch forced.

We settle into silence, shoulders pressed against each other as the sun begins to rise. 

“Do you think she’s…” I start, then stop. Unsure where to go.

“I dunno,” Sasuke supplies, lips twitching grimmly. “But there is one thing I do know.”

My teammate turns to face me, and my breath almost catches on the way that his features glow in the morning light, dawn creeping across his features like molten gold.

“She loved - loves - us,” He says with the calm surety of someone commenting on the color of the sky. “And she never did anything to hurt us.”

“Except for lie.”

It’s not bitter, exactly - my tone. More … resigned. She lied.

“She always knew more than she should’ve,” Sasuke reasoned. “Do you think that you or I or anyone really would’ve been better off knowing?”

I can only shake my head. No, we wouldn’t have been. 

“Danzo had Red Eyes,” I change the subject abruptly. “How -”

“I got debriefed,” He sighed heavily, and I regret bringing it up. “I think part of me knew - not that the Warhawk had one … but that it wasn’t only under orders. The Massacre, I mean.”

“Yeah,” I breathe out, shifting to better feel the raven’s warm, solid strength. “I know what you mean.”

“Do you …” He stops, searching for words. “When she comes back, will you be able to forgive her?”

“When the Weasel comes back will you be able to forgive him?”

He frowns at me, “That’s not the same.”

“Isn’t it?” I ask. “Two siblings of ours, both only ever following orders but keeping secret from us all the same. Both having killed what was left of their family.Both missing ninja of the village.”

“You don’t really believe that,” He protests, and I’m shaking my head before he even finishes the sentence. 

“No, I don’t,” I admit. “But the parallels are there and you can’t deny them.”

“I don’t care about parallels,” He almost-growls. “He killed, she killed - it doesn’t matter. She tried and he never did.”

“And when Itachi comes back?” I ask him, searching his face. “What will you do then?”

“Mourn what could’ve been,” He replies immediately. “But never mourn him.”

“Okay,” I relent, switching back to Common. “Okay.”

OKURIMONO NO CHISHIKI

Time passes slowly and quickly,

As I traveled, throwing caution to the wind as I raced through the rest of The Land of Lightning, I tested my limits. I had no way of knowing how I compared to a proper Uchiha, but spending time with Sasuke and Kakashi lead to a level of familiarity with the functions of the Sharingan that Kakashi himself didn’t have when he got his transplant. I spent the dash for the border it wasting bits and pieces of my precious chakra to familiarize myself the best I could with the Sharingan implanted behind my red irises. It would no me no good to get into a fight with a tool I didn’t know how to use.

I had also checked my reflection in a mirror I had constructed. My eyes didn’t change when the sharingan was activated, an advantage that would no doubt save my life. I needed every one I could get.

I was beginning to feel very much like a Mary Sue at this point.

In no time at all, I arrived at the edge of Sound, having dodged border patrol and sentries alike until I place myself directly outside of the compound of a village’s gates.

“I’ve something of interest for Orochimaru of the Sannin,” I announce to the Oto air, sporting a full fledged Kumo accent I picked up while I was in Lightning. “Tell him the killer of Uchiha Itachi and Hoshigaki Kisame is willing to make a trade.”

And with a flurry of motion, I’m surrounded on all sides and locking gazes with Kabuto - one of the most dangerous men in the Nations - as he laughs hideously at me.

“Is that so?”

The room is concrete. Designed as an arena of some sort, I’d bet. It’s large, as large as the space I had my chunin exams - I’m thankful we aren’t in some tiny room. I can’t be destructive if I’m worried the walls will come down on me.

Orochimaru was summoned promptly, leaving Kabuto as guards and a handful of Oto nin dotting the wall. 

“And you are?” The snake of a man hisses once we’ve all settled in a pseudo mexican standoff. “I don’t believe we’ve had the pleasure of meeting.”

‘Sweet. Disguise fools a Sannin.’

“The people of Kumo call me Okurimono no Chishiki,” I answer cryptically. “But I am not here about myself, Snake Sannin. I am here about a trade.”

“Ah yes,” He hisses, his sickly yellow eyes locked on mine. “You claim to have killed not one but two of the Akatsuki. That is very impressive for a no name kunoichi like you, don’t you think?”

“You find me a liar,” I allow, shrugging delicately. “I would do the same in your place. Would you care to verify the authenticity of this then?”

I pull out a storage seal (Ruto wasn’t the only one who could do fuinjutsu) and with a poof of displaced air and chakra dust Samehada is in my hand, mewling with the loss of it’s master. I pump a thimbleful of chakra into it in a half assed placation.

“Indeed,” Orochimaru hisses, and holds a hand out in an obvious demand to hold it.

I carelessly flip it towards him and pretend that I don’t flinch when he catches it greedily. 

“So there might be some validity to your words after all, Okurimono-chan,” He practically purrs, eyes locked on the sword and overall forcing me to hold back a shudder. “But we both know I’ve a legendary sword of my own. This -” He chucked it to the side, lodging it hilt deep in a wall and nearly clipping one of his subordinates. “- doesn’t interest me.”

I reach carefully - mindful of the ever present danger in the room - into my pouch and remove a single glass jar: Itachi’s black eyes floating in the preserving fluid within. 

“I hope you don’t mind I’m not willing to throw these around, Orochimaru-sama,” I challenge, just on the edge of mocking. 

He only nods, eyes locked firmly on my movements and he beckens for Kabuto to move forward. 

Kabuto approached slowly, eyes studying my body language just as much as the eyes in the jar. I keep everything about me wary but firm, not aggressive but perhaps merely greedy. Exactly what would be expected in a weaker kunoichi in the face of a Sannin.

I wait. Hold back my bloodlust as he leans down to examine the jar, they eyes. The structure of the nerve, the lack of damage. His guard is up the entire time and I force myself to wait.

After a number of agonizing minutes - with Kabuto going so far as to place a finger on the jar to run a cursory scan - the grey haired man settles back, satisfied with their authenticity. And then for a fraction of a second, his guard is down.

I wait a moment. Just a second more.

I drop the jar carelessly and as his gaze follows the descent I reach out with a hand coated with chakra -

And fry his nervous system and chakra system in one devastating blow.

Not even Tsunade could recover from that.

Before anyone in the room can fully process what had happened, I activate one of the many seals on my person and a barrier sphere half the size of the room leaps into existence - sealing me, Orochimaru, the dead body of Kabuto, and the arm and torso of one of the faster guards in.

It was a seal designed by Ruto by my prompting, a way for medics to seal in the most grievously injured during a mission and keep out any unwanted attackers. The integrity was tied to my life: as long as I was still alive, this barrier would not fall. And as long as I was alive, no one could get in or out. I had essentially evened the playing field between me and Orochimaru in one fell swoop.

The snake Sannin snarled at me, furious and - just a little bit - impressed with my sheer gall. “You are courting death, little girl.”

Courting? I had conquered it.

“Then why don’t you deliver?” I mock him, and with one powerful stomp I pulverize what was left of the jar containing Uchiha Itachi’s eyes, destroying Orochimaru’s only chance at getting the Sharingan.

That sent him over the edge, and he hissed a deadly sound as he drew Kusanagi, his all cutting sword, and prepared to kill me.