Chapter 5
(Authors note)
TW: suicide, bullying
Chanter 5
Monday march 8 3:23 pm
Thad’s pov🎵
Everyone I know is an idiot. Not Seb though Seb is actually smart. Except for when he threw that slushy though the rock salt was to make sure that the slushy didn't melt and no one expected Blane to jump in front of Kurt. But that's not the point; the entirety of the warblers are idiots. No one and I mean no one in the 24 people in this club had thought “hey we haven't updated our website in almost a year we should do that!” but no! Everyone forgot and now the administration is getting on us to update it. There are still photos of seniors from last year on there and we don't have our wins from this year still on there. And not only that but it is apparently my job to update it!
This was Barry's job last year and he was actually good at it cuz he learned everything from Iris. and now he’s back in central and i'm stuck trying to update the website in my free period that I usually use to sleep before practice and now i'm just in the library that doubles as the warblers practice room trying to figure out how to format a website.
Wait!! I can just call Barry. I quickly dug through my bag for my phone. I scroll through to find Barry's contact “the chemist”. It rings for a while and says “Barry Allen's phone, leave a message.” “oh come on Barry!!!” I say hang up “who else do i know that can format websites?” I ask the empty room. “Iris” I yell her name coming to my mind
The phone rings as i put the phone on speaker next to me “hello” iris says answering “Iris i love you and cherish you” there's a long pause before Iris says “Thad your gay and I have a boyfriend” i laugh before saying “I know but i need your help trying to format a website for the warblers and i just can't figure it out” i say rubbing a hand over my face.
“You could have called Barry, you know he’s made pretty good websites in his time” Iris said “yeah well he didn't answer my call and I need this done by 5:00 or the principal is probably going to yell at us.”
“I can help you”
~~
After 10 minutes of Iris talking me through how to fix and update the website “ its up its finally up thank you Iris i owe you my first born” iris laughs than says “I don't want your first born Thad, but i will take you staying in central before you head to Coast City for school lord knows how much Eddie wants to talk sports with someone that understands it”
“You guys know that Barry was in lacrosse here right?” I ask knowing he knows some stuff about sports.
“Yeah we know but it doesn't count sense he only joined because it was the best way for him to regain the strength he lost while being on bed rest from the Troy incident” That was true he’d been on mandatory bed rest for three weeks then shipped to france to live with his aunt and uncle were he was in a wheelchair for two weeks then after a month there he went back to the states to start school as Sebastian Smythe and joining me. who had already moved from Central City High to Dalton a year earlier.
“Speaking of that ass.” I say and Iris doesn't need any more prompting “he got expelled in our first week back from summer break” I pause for a long second and “and no one told me!!! I might have just gone back to central for senior year if i'd known! He was the reason I left central in the first place.”
Iris let me finish then she said “Well he tried to hurt Barry again but he did it in front of me, Eddie, Luke, and like twenty other kids and we all decided we had enough. so kids from the chemistry club, wrestling team, yearbook, and theater club all came forward”
What iris said made sense. Troy had basically made the entire student body hate him but since he was the star football player he was untouchable. One of the many reasons that he had not gotten in trouble for what he had done to barry.
Iris paused for a moment “And and the main thing that got him expelled was an incident report Joe had of a freshman who had tried to end his own life after being bullied so much and who finally hit his breaking point after he was yelled at and called a gay freak by a boy named Troy. We were going to tell you but it got out that you were the freshman”
Iris finished and finally said and we were quite for a second until i said “You guy did want me to come back to central with everyone in school know that I had reached such a low” “yeah we really didn't know how to tell you that you trying to end your own life when you were 14 was what made the school bored realize that the star football play actually could do wrong.”
I sat there thinking of how shity i had felt then. The only friends i had at that time were Eddie iris Barry and Luke. Freshman year had been a really crappy time especially with how only one out of my three friends were at the high school. Eddie had tried to help but with how at that time he was just as helpless as me against the boy who had been a good seven inches taller than both of them. Troy had known how to get into both of our heads, Eddie, his weight and my parents divorce then later me being gay. A week before winter break everything had just become too much.
“Plus you've made a life at dalton you're not the quiet kid that would shy away from people and couldn't bear to sing in front of people” Iris was right I had grown. I wasn't the kid who couldn't say more than five words at a time or couldn't make eye contact to save his life.
“This talk went from me needing help with a website to a really emotional talk didn't it” i laugh at the end it sounds bitter.
“Yeah, yeah it did but you survived so did Barry even if you both almost didn't you're still here and you've both made your own lives and you're safe and happy” as Iris says that I pull up my sleeve slightly. The scares had faded over time but I still wore bracelets, watches, or long sleeves to cover them up. I didn't want people knowing they usually treated me like glass after finding out.
“Yeah and no one will ever change that not for me not for Barry if we have anything to say about it” I say with fervor.
Were silent for a moment “You no i've been thinking about getting a moth or a semicolon tattoo its not like i were to show the scars but it's a subtle nod to how i have struggled but have overcome” I say slightly nervous to hear what she will say about it.
“Semicolon is the one that means that you have or know someone that has struggled with mental health right?” Iris asks “i've been thinking about getting one” i smile knowing that she didn't think it was a bad idea.
“Yeah, yeah it is” i say
“Iris! We need your help with editing the year book!” someone yells over the phone “ok! I'll be there in a second!” iris yells back to the person “tell your mom I said hi” she says to me “ok. tell the others i say” i say in response
“Bye” i say
“Bye Thaddeus” iris say to me
“I will tell Luke to give you a glitter bomb!” I say she knows I hate being called my full name before I hang up.
After hanging up I rubbed my face due to how the talk had brought up some old emotions and memories. I get up to put some of my stuff away and I turn I see almost half the warblers standing in the entries to the practice room. I freeze when I see them. My eyes quickly go to the clock above the door. It read 3:49 class ended 9 minutes ago and scene practice started at 4:00 most of the members just went to the practice room and just hung out. And bell system in the practice room has been broken for almost a month
In those nine minutes they probably heard almost all of my and Iris's whole conversation. We stand there looking all looking at each other and I can tell by their facial expressions; That they heard every single word.
No one said a word until. “So you got the website up?” Nick said in a very awkward tone.
“Y-yeah i did” I winced at how my voice broke at the start of my scents.
Practice started like normal but i pretended that i didn't notice how some of them gave me glances or how they looked concerned when I went to my dorm room after practice alone. God, I never thought that I would ever want my friends to not care so much.