Chapter 6
“Hey, did you fuckers miss me?” Hidan said as he approached the table, sitting down without really waiting for an answer.
“You weren’t gone long enough, yeah.” Deidara sighed, acting as if he wished Hidan took longer despite actually being excited to continue with his meddling. Although, if they had taken longer because they were kissing Deidara wouldn’t have minded at all-
“Hidan-saaaaan-!” Tobi half berated, half whined. “You didn’t fix your potty mouth!”
“Like I give a damn-“
"Hidan.”
“What- I’m allowed to fucking cuss, Sasori. It’s not like their gonna kick me out for cussing with my-“ He paused, looking at Tobi with a mix of disgust and resignation on his face. “friends.“
He really didn’t want to include Tobi as a part of that but he figured if he excluded Tobi or called him anything but then the child would whine and create a scene and then they would get kicked out.
Hidan was certain that Sasori didn’t want that to happen considering how he quickly stopped the food fight that almost began. Sure, he had said that Sasori wasn’t going to be able to tame him – he wasn’t his dad regardless of any daddy jokes Deidara wanted to make – but that didn’t mean that Hidan had to make things harder on him-
"Hidan can’t be fixed, un.” Deidara half whispered to Tobi, clearly saying it loud enough for him to here.
“Ohhhh-“ Tobi nodded, accepting what Deidara said with no questions before he looked over at Hidan. “Tobi is sorry for you loss, Hidan-san.”
“Fuck both of you.” Hidan said but there was more amusement in his voice than there usually would have been. He probably would have been more angry but Tobi just apologized for his loss, how could he not be amused at something as stupid as that?
“Yeah, yeah, we love you too, Hidan. Don’t we, Danna?” Deidara said, winking at Sasori to both his and Hidan’s horror.
Rather than reply to Deidara, Sasori looked over his head and merely said. “There’s our food.”
Hidan didn’t say anything – couldn’t since Sasori was right there – but he still leaned forward some and kicked Deidara’s shin hard enough to get the message across. ‘Don’t fucking ruin things. I said to not meddle.’
“OW-“ Deidara looked over at Hidan only to be met with a pointed look. Luckily the blonde understood the glance and looked at Tobi instead. “What the hell, Tobi!? That was my leg-!”
“Tobi didn’t do anyth-“
“That reminds me, un! You have to tell us about your crush!”
Just then, the food finally finished its trip to their table, providing Tobi with the perfect distraction. “Tobi is hungry!” He declared, grabbing for one of his chicken nuggets.
“Me too- wait-! You’re not gonna fucking distract us. You still gotta tell us about your crush-!” Hidan declared as he all but yanked the nugget out of Tobi’s hand.
“Bu-“
“Back me up on this, Sasori-“
“You want me to convince him?”
“Yeah-“
“Why?”
"Uhh- because you’re nicest to him?”
“I regularly try to poison him. How is that being nice?”
Tobi looked at his food then back to Sasori with mild alarm. Did he- “Did Sasori-san poi-“
"Maybe. You’ll just have to try it and find out, won’t you?”
“…Tobi isn’t hungry anymore-“
Hidan laughed. “Good fucking work!” He unceremoniously dropped the nugget back onto Tobi’s plate. “Now tell us about your crush-“
“Okies but let Tobi think-“
“You have to think about your crush first, un?”
"There’s a lot of things about them and Tobi is only saying one. Tobi has to decide which to say.”
“If you tell them their name then you won’t have to tell them anything else.” Sasori pointed out. He didn’t really care who Tobi had a crush on, trusting that it really wasn’t Hidan. As long as the child stayed out of his way – and didn’t annoy him with his crush – then Sasori didn’t care who Tobi liked.
“Yeah, just fucking te-“
“No. Tobi wants to say what he wants to say.”
"Go on, un, just ignore them and think about it.”
Tobi nodded and did just that.
One of the problems he was having was who to tell them about. It wasn’t like Tobi liked two people, not at all. The problem was that Tobi liked someone and Obito liked – loved – someone.
He could tell them about the person Obito liked. They wouldn’t know who she was and it would make thing easier as far as any matchmaking may go; she was dead, you couldn’t really get with a dead person unless you harnessed the power of ten tails and a moon but really that’s a different story.
The problem with doing that was all of the emotional baggage he hid behind the Tobi act. He didn’t want to talk about or even think about sad things and he certainly didn’t want them knowing anything about the past that had led him here, in this restaurant with three people whom he was deceiving, a part of an organization whom he was mostly deceiving.
On the other hand he could tell them who Tobi liked. That one was easy because it meant he didn’t have to let them see the past he was a part of. They wouldn’t see the pain that was moving him forward even now.
The hard part was that it was someone they knew. He accepted that Tobi liked him because he was one of the only people who knew the truth behind his mask, and he was the only one who was around consistently. It just made sense for him to like someone with whom he could be himself, but how did he tell the others a fact about him without them figuring out who it was?
By being extremely vague and wording the truth in a way that no one else would.
"Tobi’s crush is special because he’s two different colors-!” Tobi declared, hoping that no one would make the real connection.
“So he’s like mixed?” Deidara asked, slightly confused on when Tobi would have met someone like that. He had been almost certain that it was someone in the akatsuki.
Tobi nodded, relieved that his words had been taken the way he intended it to. It helped that everyone tended to steer clear of the man and that he was never really at the front of anyone’s mind.
Except, a glance at Sasori told him, at the front of Sasori’s mind. The redhead was giving him a knowing look and Tobi didn’t like that. He didn’t want anyone to know and if Sasori said someth-
“It’s not poisoned.” Sasori said, meaning Tobi’s food, of course, but also saying so as a way to show that he wouldn’t tell. He knew now for a fact that it wasn’t Hidan and he didn’t care for meddling like some people did-
Tobi blinked in surprise, smiling and nodded before he started to quickly shove nuggets under his mask to eat.
“Hmm, what if we all said something about our crush? It would be fun, yeah? You should start, Hidan-“ Deidara winked at him, not being able to help giving away just what he was doing.
“Wha- jashin-damnit, Dei-! I told you to not-“ He glanced at Sasori, realizing that if he continued it would be the same as just straight up kissing Sasori: he would know. “Fuck- I gotta-“ He got up and stormed out of the restaurant, too angry to stay there without fucking everything up.
Sasori blinked at where Hidan had just been, wondering why that set him off so quickly. He had been almost certain that Deidara knew about his feelings and that the suggestion had been a ploy to get him to admit it. But now Hidan was gone and- wait…did Hidan-? But, no, why would he-
Sasori glanced at the door then at Deidara and Tobi before his gaze flickered back and he stood up. He had to go make sure Hidan was alright even though he had an idea of why the silverhaired man was so upset and despite knowing that he always calmed down eventually.