When he was young if you asked Kakashi what his Utopia was he would've said it would be where Konoha nin never lost and always survived. Then after he was paired with Minato it would’ve been that Minato never lost his light. He was like a burning bonfire, worthy of the title Hokage. He lit up everything around him and although he never melted Kakashi’s icy exterior he did warm him. After Rin and Obito joined his team his Utopia would’ve been just for Obito to shut up for once.
At 16 he realized he had a crush on a teammate and Minato guessed Rin. He guessed wrong. Kakashi’s Utopia would’ve be to not fall in love, no need to have such a weakness. At 17 his Utopia would’ve been to fall out of love. He was hopeless and was thankful that Obito didn’t know and that he never would.
Then Obito had kissed him. They were in the garage getting more drinks from the fridge out there, their teammates waiting for them in the other room. Obito had grabbed him and kissed him. Kakashi froze, at that moment his Utopia would’ve been to be anywhere but there, so as a ninja he panicked and teleported away. The next day Minato asked him why he scurried off and Kakashi told him he had felt sick.
During training the next day Kakashi wanted nothing but for the ground to swallow him, despite there being jutsus to do so he managed to refrain himself. Obito gave him a hurt look and trained only with Rin.
At 19 his Utopia would've been for Obito to survive the mission; they were pinned to a tree by a large rock spike jutting from the ground through their abdomen. He passed out, or that’s what Kakashi told himself. Minato and Rin had to pry a bawling Kakashi away from him.
Obito had survived. Kakashi knew he should say something, but whenever he tried words failed him, so he lived in silence. Kakashi didn’t sulk no matter what Minato said.
At 20 his Utopia was Obito to forgive him. Forgive him for being a coward who was afraid of his own feelings. He tried to be more social despite the drain it took on him. Then the movie nights started, in hindsight Kakashi should’ve shut it down the second Rin mentioned it. It started as a group thing, Kushina, Minato, Rin, Obito, and himself. The Rin had a shift change and couldn’t find time to join them every two weeks. Minato had a security issue on his hands at the moment that overworked him and by extension Kushina who helped him.
Which left Obito and Kakashi alone. Neither wanting to be the one to suggest quitting the movie nights. The air felt suffocating this time, their thighs touching. Obito had started to get tired, but not relaxed. He had started to slump but dared not to lean against Kakashi. Kakashi felt the hot rush of shame burn in his chest at Obito’s somber mood, and the pain in their eyes. After the movie ended, Obito always chose short ones when it was just them. He stood to leave and Kakashi blurted out,
“Stay,” Then at the affronted look on Obito’s face he added. “Please,” Obito slowly sat back down and gave Kakashi a wary look. Kakashi sighed, wishing this could be easier. He clenched his fists and stared at them instead of making eye contact,
“I love you,” Obito’s expression didn't change, Kakashi didn’t know if that was a good or bad sign. Then Obito leaned against him, heat radiating from his body,
“How about another movie?”
At 24 Kakashi’s Utopia was to wake with his boyfriend in the morning, missions and forced hospitals stays tended to prevent it but it happens often enough to keep Kakashi content.