The path to herself

Meditating, Sakura sat on the bed next to the chamber door. Haku and Zabuza hadn't come back from their information gathering yet, so she thought she should use the time wisely. After she had found a job in the village, she had discussed some more details with the bar owner, especially the payment and her working hours. Afterwards she had visited the shops in the centre and had found one or two things she wanted to buy later as soon as she had money. Beside a few Kunais and Senbons she had seen a few stylish hooded shirts that would fit tight to her head. If she put them on, her hair would be well protected, so no one would recognize her from far away. In addition, the tighter cut promised protection from sudden exposure should the hood want to blow off her head, which would not happen so easily. Similarly, the shape of the cut wouldn't restrict her field of vision to the side too much, which would benefit her. Now all she had to do was raise enough money to buy a few of them.

A small, barely perceptible chakra vibration let Sakura lose her concentration for a moment and startle from her meditation. The chakra seemed familiar to her, but since she had started meditating, she had never felt anything like that. Again Sakura closed her eyes, concentrated on her inner center and felt her chakra as Zabuza and Haku showed her a month ago. It pulsated inside her more than a few moments ago, probably due to the shock she had felt. Young Haruno concentrated once again on this other chakra and tried to push her perception further out, away from her inner core and body. Suddenly it was there again, this time much closer than a few moments ago and with one blow she opened her eyes at the same instant as the room door was opened. Irritated and briefly disoriented, she stared at the faces of two ninjas she had gotten to know better over the past month. "You look as if you have seen a ghost, Sak. Are you all right?" Haku had entered the room first, followed by Zabuza and had sat next to her when he noticed how much Sakura was standing beside her. When initially no reaction came from the younger, Haku stretched out his arm to gently touch her on the shoulder. His plan was stopped, however, when Sakura reflexively grabbed his wrist and held it. Horrified, Sakura stared at Haku's wrist shortly afterwards and let it go. She almost felt bad about her reaction. "Stop it." Zabuza's voice sounded serious. "Don't apologize for reflexes that save your life. It could have been someone else coming into the room. Besides, Haku should know you shouldn't bring back shinobi who have spaced out through physical contact." Sakura timidly nodded at his words, while Haku looked at the floor guiltily. "Would you still like to tell us what happened?" Behind him Zabuza had closed the door and was now standing in his full size in front of the bed on which Sakura and Haku were sitting and Sakura wondered what she should say.  "I..." she began hesitantly, "I don't know exactly what happened myself. After I was in the village and found a job, I thought I'd use the time until dinner to meditate like you showed me. And... and suddenly there was a small shock in my chakra. The chakra didn't belong to me, it didn't flow through my body and it was different than when someone put me under a Genjutsu. That made me lose my concentration and when I tried again I concentrated more on things outside my chakra channels. This time the strange chakra was closer and before I could process it the door opened and also I opened my eyes...". A shudder went through Sakura's body remembering how parallel everything was. It was almost as if she had seen the other chakra open the door… Whoa! "That was you!" Both male ninjas looked at Sakura skeptically, almost as if she had something crazy about her. "This other chakra I mean. That... that was you Haku! No idea why I felt you, but when you opened the door, it was as if I looked through the door, only I didn't really see it, but somehow. Does that make sense?" A heavy silence had fallen over the room and nobody dared to say anything. It didn't make sense to any of the three ninjas what Sakura had said. 

Zabuza was the first to move again. "We should keep an eye on that, but you said you found a job too? We'd better get something to eat and go through everything else." His two protégés nodded slightly, hardly recognizable if he was honest. Shortly thereafter they had disappeared from the room, only to return to the room a little later with trays full of food. For the first few minutes they silently enjoyed the first meal that they had not cooked and hunted themselves, before they finally reached the actual program of the evening. "It was harder to find a job than I thought. The people here aren't exactly keen on having children work for them. Pretty frustrating if you ask me. But I couldn't give up either, so I thought about what I could do. I noticed that a job where I could not only gather information but also refine my ninja techniques would be ideal. So I was thinking that even though you've helped me a lot in the past weeks, my skills list hasn't really grown, but I'm good at using the basic jutsus from the academy. So I used a Henge and got older. Using this method I also found a job in a bar. So I train my chakra reserves and infiltration skill, get money for it and can collect useful information. After all, it is a bar and where are people most eager to talk? Where a lot of alcohol flows". Sakura was proud of her idea and the success she had in finding a job, but she couldn't tell anything from the faces of the two men. When they both remained silent for the next few minutes, Sakura became more and more restless. What if Zabuza and Haku didn't agree? What if they tried to talk her out of taking this job? 'Why do you keep questioning those two? If something doesn't suit them, they will say something. Maybe they didn't expect you to come up with such an idea? You always overthink everything.' Inner grumbled in Sakura's head and silenced her. "Guys" she asked timidly when she still hadn't received an answer after 5 minutes and apparently she tore the two ninjas out of her thoughts. "You really did... You know bars can be dangerous with all those drunks. And what if other ninjas come in and see through your henge?" Haku's concern took away Sakura's fear that nobody would agree with her idea. Inner was obviously not so wrong when she said that neither of them had expected her to come up with such an idea. "I agree with Haku, bars are not harmless and your chakra reserves are not exactly well developed. Do you really think that you can maintain your henge as long as your working hours are? To use it at the same time as a kind of training is a really good idea and yes it will certainly give you a lot of information if you do it skilfully..." For a moment it was quiet again and Zabuza seemed in thought. "I hope for your sake you know what you're getting yourself into. I suppose you will work in the evening or at night then?" A nod was all he got as an answer. "Take your sais or at least a few Kunais with you when you start your shift. Even if you pretend to be a civilian, it is better to have at least something on your body so that you can defend yourself if necessary". Sakura had to stifle the upcoming smile. The two had been silent because they had been worried about her, even if neither of them would admit that openly. But Sakura had learned better to look behind the masks of the two ninjas and to read between the lines. "Don't worry, I'll be careful. The Sais won't be easy to hide on the body I have chosen as camouflage, but Kunais are feasible. In addition, my number of hours slowly increases over the next few weeks, so I can get used to running around in a Henge for several hours. This way I can also get used to the constant chakra flow that I have to keep up. With my control, I shouldn't waste too much chakra on the technique, so I should get by with my chakra for my shift." A satisfied, barely recognizable nod she received as an answer from both and for a while they ate silently again.

As soon as they had eaten the food, there was a knock at their door and an employee of the Inn put her head through the door and asked if everything was to their satisfaction before she took the empty plates and bowls and disappeared from the room again. "Your job might also be helpful to our mission." Zabuza started and got the full attention of the pink haired girl. "I can't tell you too much yet, we still lack information ourselves, but keep your eyes and ears open if you hear anything about groups that are causing problems for the people in the village." "Hai" Sakura almost floated because of her feelings. She could help Zabuza and Haku, maybe, but it was more than she could hope for. After all, she finally wanted to start showing both her gratitude for taking her with them and training her. Sakura stretched out and let her joints crack slightly. "I'm slowly getting ready, my shift starts soon. I should be back shortly after midnight." With these words she disappeared into the bathroom to get ready for the evening. When she came out again, she rummaged in her weapon bag for two Kunais and a few Senbons before she concentrated the necessary amount of chakra to transform into her work disguise. It was always a strange feeling to change into another person and it took her a few moments to get used to the new body. She was taller, more feminine, and her clothes flattered the new curves, but left her less room for large movements should she be attacked. "Interesting choice you made there." Was the only comment she got from Zabuza about her new person as she searched for suitable hiding places for her weapons. "She is the daughter of a merchant in Konoha. I met her once or twice when I accompanied my parents to the store. Nothing special, but I think she should be enough for the job. See you later." With these words she said goodbye and disappeared out the door. She pushed the memories of her parents away in a deep corner of her mind with the help of Inner and made her way to the bar.

The job was more exhausting than she had thought, but what good experience did she have as a waitress or bartender. Exactly none at all. The drunken guests, mainly of a male nature, didn't make it any easier for her either, when she tried to make her way through the crowd to deliver orders. She even had to pull herself together not to drive out of her skin when a guest thought to place his hand not exactly inconspicuous on her ass. She almost dissolved the Jutsu, so in rage she had been. When she spoke of Jutsu, it became more and more exhausting to maintain the transformation, the happier she was when it was finally midnight and one of her fellow workers came to replace her. "For the first day you did really well, Suri-san. Even some customers left more tips because of you. If you go on like this, we might soon be the most popular bar in the village. This would be great for the business, but it could also attract more trouble. Well, whatever, that's not your problem. Good night and see you tomorrow Suri-san." With a short nod and a warm smile Sakura in the form of Suri turned away from her colleague and wished her a successful night and then disappeared in the dark of night. Her way to the Inn was not far, thank God, and she quietly stepped into the room which she shared with Haku and Zabuza. As soon as the door behind her fell into the lock, she dissolved her henge and a deep exhaustion crept into her bones. The hours had been more exhausting than she had imagined. Quietly she stepped into the bathroom and came out a little later just as quietly before she went to bed, which she shared with Haku, and had fallen asleep a few seconds later. So fast she didn't even notice the look of the boy who had been watching her closely as soon as she entered the room.

The morning came faster than Sakura liked and after an extensive breakfast she followed the two ninjas into the nearby forest surrounding the village to continue her training. As usual, it was hard and neither of them took a step back, even when Zabuza showed her new Katas to train with her two Sais, he did not treat her gently. Mistakes were quickly and mercilessly corrected and she was to go through the forms until they felt as if she had never done anything else in her life. For lunch they stopped and looked for something to eat before she was sent back from Zabuza to meditate while he and Haku continued to gather information. As on the evening before, they had dinner together and Sakura got ready for her job afterwards. This routine lasted almost a week before Zabuza and Haku told her that they would not be in the village for several days. Not that Sakura felt uncomfortable on her own, because she did, but she had expected it to come. After all, Zabuza had warned her at the beginning. But being on her own for a few days was more frightening for the young Kunoichi than she would admit. She had set herself the goal of making the best of it and stuck to her routine as regards morning training and meditation in the afternoon. She also went to the bar to work as usual in the evening. However, she was much more tense that evening than normal, which she attributed to the absence of the two ninja.

"Evening Hanamaki-san and Kuro-san." She greeted her two work colleagues and gave them a friendly smile before putting on the waiter's apron and taking care of her tables. Over the week she had gained a certain amount of confidence working in the bar and had also established a good working relationship with her colleagues, but she could not get rid of the feeling that everyone was more tense than usual this evening.

The first hours went on as usual, customers came and went, some gave tips and others behaved quite dubiously when drunk, but it was nothing Sakura couldn't handle somehow, even if it took her a while. But all this changed abruptly and a group of 5 men came into the bar. Instantly the atmosphere in the room changed and some customers left in a hurry as soon as they had left the necessary money on the table for their orders. ~ Strange ~ Sakura thought and narrowed her eyes slightly. "Bring us some of your best sake and 5 mugs of beer, be quick." The voice of the man who had spoken, sounded dominant and didn't tolerate any back-talk. It was like the man was used to bossing others around. Once again she could only stand by and watch as her work colleagues ran around like a bunch of ants to carry out the order. Apparently the group was anything but unknown, Sakura couldn't explain the behaviour of her colleagues and guests otherwise. From the corner of Sakura's eye, she saw her superior waving to her and curiously responded. She had to hold to herself firmly when she was suddenly pulled behind a door not to reach for her Kunai. Instead she tried to give an angry "what" of herself, only to find a hand on her mouth a short time later. "Shhhhh. Calm down Suri-san. We don't want to attract the attention of the men out there." Only slowly Sakura cooled down and nodded slightly to her superior, she had understood, and finally the hand disappeared from her mouth. The situation was far too confusing for her taste and Sakura needed answers so she knew what was going on. "You surely want to know what's going on. I can't tell you much either, except that the men belong to a larger group that supposedly comes from Kirigakure. They come to the village every now and then, for some months now, and tyrannize us. Mostly they skip the bill, drink any alcohol they can get their hands on and harass the female waitresses. I've heard from other bar operators that they even take women with them and I don't want to imagine what they do with them. I had hoped that they would stay away for a while longer so you would have left the village by the time they got back."

That used to be news. Bad news. Was the group Zabuzas and Hakus mission? It would be possible, so far she hadn' heard anything else of gossip what a mission could contain. These men were her first lead to anything. "So they've been rioting around the village for months, especially in bars? Why? And what should we do now?" She couldn't possibly just disappear now and leave the staff in the bar alone with these men. It didn't matter that she was supposed to be a civilian, if what her superior said was true, then she couldn't just leave the other women behind and hope none of the men would attack them. None of the waitresses had experience in self-defense. "I can't just let you go in case they disappear, but I want you to work behind the counter tonight. You should be safer there than if I let you serve. I don't know much more about the rest. In Kiri it is said to have given an overthrow, but that is only a rumour."After a short reflection Sakura nodded easily, it made sense to let her work at least a little bit protected. There was a physical obstacle, the bar, which separated her from the men what promised at least minimal protection. She wasn't keen on being touched by strangers, it was enough for her to serve normal customers, who inadvertently touched her ass as she passed them. As for the rumor. She would wait until she was back at the Inn and then talk to Zabuza and Haku about it as soon as they were back. "I understood Sato-san. I stay behind the bar. Maybe the evening won't be as bad as we fear." For a moment her corners of her mouth twitched upwards, but she really didn't smile. With a pat on her shoulder from her boss she was sent back to the bar and Sakura's gaze wandered to the table with the strange men who were drinking properly. Hopefully this evening didn't escalate.

She cursed her luck. Why couldn't something go normally in her life without causing problems? The first hours in the bar had been pleasant according to the circumstances. Behind the bar she was protected from physical advances, but that didn't mean that the men didn't say anything and the further the evening went and the more alcohol flowed, the more intrusive the customers became. Especially the group of the 5 men who allegedly liked to riot bars. But the more alcohol flowed, the more aggressive the men became, which gradually scared away the less self-confident customers, so that they were now only with the group of men in the bar. "Kyaaaaa!" The scream of one of her co-workers made Sakura turn around, had she turned her back to the room for a moment. "Come here, babe, how about a little fun. Just us two or three." The sleazy and dirty grin could not be overlooked, while the woman tried in vain to free herself from the man's grip. But the man only pressed her on the table and took more and more of her freedom of movement. "Leave Hanamaki-san alone!" Sakura interfered and threw an empty glass towards the man. Her throwing arm had improved thanks to her training and the glass hit the man right at the temple, which surprised him to stagger a few steps back. "Damn bitch, you dare!" The man yelled at her after he had worked through his first shock and Sakura should have known. She should have known that nothing good would result if she intervened. But she couldn't turn a blind eye, that put her in this tricky situation.

All of a sudden the guy stood in front of her, grabbed Sakura's wrist and pulled her over the bar with full force without her having a chance to defend herself. "Looks like you want to take the place of the little slut." The man's voice was aggressive, but his tone also resonated with lust and excitement. As soon as he had dragged Sakura over the bar, he blocked any escape route by pressing her with his massive body onto the closest table. With one hand he fixed her wrists over her head and with his free hand he spread Sakura's legs to better position himself. Panic swept over the Haruno as the guy with his dirty hand dared to move over her body, or rather the transformed body. "Leave your dirty fingers off me, you creep!" All screaming and squirming brought nothing, the grip was simply not looser around her wrists. "You bitch begged me to take you, didn't you? The glass and your loose mouth should be punished and me and my boys would love to take care of it." If only she could do something to escape this situation, but her mind wouldn't come up with a solution. Instead, she found herself at the mercy of her enemy again. Why the hell was everyone always stronger than her?

Sakura snatched from her thoughts when she suddenly felt a hand on her skin and heard the helpless whimpering of one of her colleagues. This just couldn't and shouldn't happen. There had to be something she could do to save herself and the other women. Somehow she had to get her hands free, then she could reach for her Kunai and then ... Yes what and then. Should she kill the men? Did she have to eliminate them? If she didn't, they could come back and more women... She couldn't allow that, but she didn't want to take more lives, not so fast at least. ‘Remember what Zabuza said to us: Death is part of being ninja and you kill to live another day. Think of what these bastards do to you and other women and girls if we don't stop it' Sakura swallowed her fear. What would she do without inners support? A question she didn't want answered. "Ok, I... I can do that. I swore I wouldn't be weak anymore and if I had to go this way, then ... that's how it is. Thank you for the reminder Inner."

Still maintaining the Jutsu, she suddenly stopped defending herself. "Hooo? Have we already given up bitch?" It wasn't easy for Sakura to pull herself together, especially when he started to rip her top piece by piece from the neckline. Sakura used his distraction to bundle some chakra into her right leg and rammed it into the guy's side as best she could. She used the opening that resulted to pull her other leg towards her and pushed her foot against her enemy's chest to push him away. The man staggered back and fell against the next table, which gave way under his weight and cracked. Without consciously wanting it, Sakura had sent chakras into her muscles to strengthen the kick. Thereby she wanted to appear as civil as possible! Groaning, her tormentor stood up and Sakura didn't have much time to take a look at the other four men.

Fortunately, the other guys had distanced themselves from her colleagues, but this meant for Sakura that she was now the focus of attention, which made her grimace unpleasantly. Her gaze caught on the table she had been lying on a few seconds before and with a force she was not aware of, she let it go over the floor to the small group of men. She was about to turn around, when she was tackled to the ground by her actual attacker. Before he could fix her hands in any way, she grabbed the Kunai in her sleeve and pulled the sharpened blade through the man's neck. His body slumped over her, blood dripping on her face and Sakura got sick. Suppressing her nausea she threw the lifeless body away and straightened up again. The room had become quiet and with watchful eyes she looked at those present in the room. A movement in the corner of her eye let Sakura act instinctively and her Kunai drilled into the shoulder of a man who had tried to grab one of her colleagues. His cry of pain was almost satisfaction for her, but she quickly shook the thought off again. She was not a cruel monster who enjoyed the suffering of others. "Get out of here and leave us in peace unless you want to end up here like your friend." The self-confidence in her voice was greater than what she actually had within herself. But Sakura couldn't let anything happen to the women and she had to play poker. Four against one wasn't easy and she wasn't sure if she was up to it, but she didn't want to find out if there was another way. "You'll regret that, bitch! We promise you that." Angry looks were thrown at her as the rest of the men left the bar and moments after the door fell into the lock, Sakura slumped down, no longer wanting to carry her weight.

Again she had taken a life and even though she remembered Zabuza's words, it did not make it easier for her to endure. "Suri-san?" timidly the voice of one of her colleagues entered her ear. She sounded insecure and anxious, almost as if she had no idea how to approach Sakura. "I'm fine, don't worry... I just need a moment. Nothing else happened to you, has it?" Sakura could only laboriously turn her head to the others and ignore the lifeless body next to her. Fortunately nobody seemed to be really hurt, which let her breathe a sigh of relief. "How come you managed to overpower the guy here at all?" The question came from her boss and Sakura looked sighing at her hands. "I had said that I was travelling with a distant relative. She was in a ninja academy for a while and showed me a few things so that I could at least defend myself a little. I think we can be grateful to her after what happened today." Sakura stuck to the story she had told at the beginning of her job. She was travelling with Sakura a distant relative in search of her relatives to enter their business, after Sakura had noticed in the academy that the ninja life is not for her. She herself as Suri had only come as a guardian and had taken care of her the years before. At least that was her cover story. Nothing too conspicuous but also nothing too unbelievable and it seemed to work. Her boss only nodded slightly at her words. "I close for today, go home. I let someone come to take care of the guy on my bar floor. Here Suri-san your payment for the week and thanks for taking care of the others. Relax from the horror and thank your relatives in my name. She has helped us very much indirectly today." A small smile stole on Sakura's lips and she nodded.

She stored the money well on her body and was happy when she could leave the bar and return to the Inn. Her room was still empty when she entered. No trace of Haku or Zabuza, much to her displeasure. After the events she would have liked to have had their company, but she couldn't have everything. With tired bones she dragged herself into the bathroom and finished her off. Sleep, however, was a long time coming when the shadows of the night haunted her and made it impossible to fall asleep peacefully. Only much later did she fall into a restless sleep.