and we wish
Touka is too grounded in this world to dream much. She remembers old days as she sleeps but they are the memories of days passed, not dreams of a could have been future (present), and for all she wishes things could have been different she takes the world as it is, she always has. So as Madara slips farther into love with a ghost she does her best to give him all she can of Tobirama (as she helps him with his hair she thinks of Tobirama- she tells him the story of the day she found her blood-brother day dreaming of wild black hair- turns out Madara can blush every bit as brightly as an albino) it is a task born half from pity and half from hate. It is perhaps cruel to tell him more of something he will never have, but it is Madara’s brother that killed him, and she can care for the Uchiha when he tells her all he knows of Tobirama, parts of his secret heart even she didn’t know. She can care for him when she thinks of what her brother would want, what was in his most secret heart. (it was Madara who had been there- Tobirama adored his overwhelming warmth, he ached to have a place in that consuming love)
So as they slaughter their way though the days she finds another- well not quite brother, but family (she is older than him, barely but still, so she gains another younger sibling) after a fashion and she can almost be satisfied with that; she has only ever wanted satisfaction really, happiness if for other people, she does not want any piece of it. She cares for him in Tobirama’s place, loves him for love of her brother, watches over him when no other person will; and it is this that seals her fate. She dies on river bank in a valley she doesn’t know that name of, she dies with a blade in her heart and a curse on her lips as she faces an abomination she cannot fathom the origin of. And she regrets that she leaves him alone with memories, but she does not regret her death as she laughs to see blood (that makes even her unnatural foe falter). The god of death is an old friend and there is nothing for her to fear there, all that she loves is waiting for her (all but one, and she fears for him a little without her to remind him of the good days)
Touka wonders what her legacy is, she thinks even if it is just the death they carved in the world she is proud it, after all many who would have someday been enemies of the peace are now no threat to any but worms.